SOS: Save Our Souls
by QueenOfFanFicWorldLoveGunner
Summary: AU Konan's moved to the country and is making new friends. But soon, that entire friendship may be put to the test. Does she really have what it takes to change? STRONG language, rating may rise. Akatsuki&Konancentric. R&R, includes PaiKon
1. Hell

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto or anything else used in here.

YO...... Okay, I know that the total population of Naruto AU Highschool fictions are through the roof. So this one's just another for the pile.

I got the idea reading another Highschool AU that had them in the country (Crocodile Farm. Go read it or I'll bite you. But if you're emotional and a Deidara fan. Grab a box of tissues.) So this one is: of course- THEM IN TEH' COUNTRY!......... WOOOOO!...... I have no creativity. (RANDOM )

I'm alittle upset to have it in Konan's POV. Cuz' that's how CrocFarm was. But I know I can write angsty-teenage-girl.... Well, Konan at least. Characters like Ino and even Tenten sometimes make me vomit. I like the shy/tomboy/angsty girls. AKA: Hinata, Temari, Anko and KONAN!

Now here are warnings: This is likely to go on hiatus like all my other stories. I swear. I have like' ten unfinished stories I haven't posted yet. (Which is why I'm open to one-shot requests! anybody? PLZ GIMME SOMETHING! THE LAST REQUEST I DID WAS A DEITEM NURSE-FIC! THE ENDING WAS RUSHED AND CORNY! PLLLLLLZ! ASK ME ANYTHING! ( I will however kindly ask you to refrain from flat-out porn. I don't think I can handle that- well. I would. But then I'd be considered ultimate-perv.... Dammit I'm having dreams of SasoDei and Sakura by herself.....(I need medication....))).... So you can just yell at me if I don't post for a while.

....Oh, right, the warnings, *cough* Ummm, Okay. This is likely to contain lots of Shonen-Ai. I mean Konan's the only chick. And however I'm not going to make it the stupid-all-partners-love-eachotha' I'll just probably have Sasori and Tobi fighting over Deidara and Hidan and Kuzu' being the BEST OF FWENDZ! And cuz' I'm not gonna make Konan a whore like she is in all the other stories that center around her (Seriously, select Konan as the main character in the search, They're all about her being the Akatsuki dudes' personal sex doll.... But I couragously reward the maker of 'Dirty Little Secrets' the reward for first Akatsuki foursome ( KonItaPaiHid. It was creepy (I'm going off track again arn't I?)))

Okay, I need to get back on track. I'm commercializing other fics and explaining my own mental disabilitys (I think I'm Schizo'd like Zetsu. Or at least Bi-Polar like Jugo. Or maybe it's just ADHD like Naruto.) RIGHTRIGHTRIGHTRIGHT WARNINGS!...... Konan's mentally unstable- So are most of the other ppl. I'm likely to severely torture some characters. And severely ignore other characters- By accident, I'll be making up a scene and when I'm almost done I realize I've forgotten to include Itachi and Kisame. I'm not even sure what I'll be doing to Zetsu yet guys. And all plans for Konan are blurred by her being a pyscho sex-aholic. (ROFL XXXHolic XD)..... It's ADHD, I'm telling you.

Or maybe I'm a shark like Kisame (too lazy to be lazy so I must keep moving. Like a shark, rawr, FEAR MEH!) ..... That was a quote from a totally awsome (and deleted) fan fic. Whose author has apparently dropped off the face of the earth. Damn, I'll miss her 'Sasori and the Big Bad Wolf'..... I'm gunna cry.

Wait- right, I must WRITE...... I'm tired. Wait, no I'm not. What am I? I'm going off track again. Must write. write. wright. whirst. wrist. wist. whrists. zombomdom.......pie.... Sorry. Authors notes are my outlet. I'm anti-social and refuse to talk to those disgusting alien whores people call 'girls my age'.....

Okay I got an idea. I couldn't think of what to write but I've got a plan goin' on. But what type of country town? When my mom and her boyfriend got into a HUUUUGE fight me and her moved to my uncle's place in Montana.

Pony Montana looked lovely.... But the people in it made it like a living hell. So now I think I can relate to living in small towns. Everyone thought I was autistic cuz' I wouldn't talk much and I think there was one lady that was a pedophile O_o Cuz' she liked rubbing my hands and smiling and now that I think about it she reminded me of Orochimaru with braids in his hair .

PS the parents will mostly be OC's unlike with my previous Conffesions of a Teenage Monster where all the extra's were main characters from the series-slash-Characters from other Shonen Jump and Shojo Beat series'..... I can stop talking now- I'm getting waaaaaaaaaay distracted.... blurry. I think I need glasses. I think Konan's mom might be an out-of-character and older-looking Tsunade. Wait-no, Yugito, yes, Yugito. And Jiraiya can be the godfather(again). Mwhahaha. I am amazing.

(Looks at how much of the story I've written)... Damn I know I didn't spell those right.... (What? all my stories start out with a unhumanly long authors note)

--------------------------------------------------------Hell

Harsh winds blowing agenst the car wildly like it was about to turn us over. Mom clentches the steering wheel for dear life. Her expression taking any resemblance we have and distorting it, her frown lines making her look twenty years older.

I shouldn't blame her, or maybe I can. A nasty divorce on the fault of my usually non-exsistant-anyway father. But mom's the one that went crazy on it immidiantly asking for the divorce and insisting we move.

Well, then again she'd been wanting to move out of the city for a while. But that didn't make it any happier a decision on my part.

But mom decided we'd drive 12-to-12 every night. Mainly because of my sleeping schedual. She was worried about it. But she'd hadn't known that it wasn't the anxiety and just withdrawal symptoms.

Keep the doses low and she never notices I'm even high. But I strangely doubt many dealers out in the country. Ah well, I wanted to quit before addiction set in anyway. She can't stop me from smoking though. Screw my damn lungs. they're only good for holding my chest up.

I don't look underage either. I went to a bar once and they didn't even ask my age. But that might've been my low-cut shirts doing, I don't feel like caring.

Not that it ever led to 'legal' troubles. My mom's a Doctor and she gives me personal papsmears monthly. God, a virgin at 16, it's embarressing. Half the girls in my class lost theirs when they were 14. But I guess that's not something to brag about. I've gone to enough classes preaching about teen pregnancy and STD's to just screw it and wait till' marriage so no one puts me in their documentry. I still get away with oral though, not that it does anything for me.

She actually decided to speak now. "Konan, it'll be nice here, I promise. We both can make new friends and have a better start." Friends? I've never had any. I hung out with people at their houses and called them my friends so she wouldn't whine. But someone who likes you _is_ always good for connections. "We'll pull into the next hotel soon. I can show you some more pictures." Not the pictures again, god I need a cigerette.

We finally pulled into a Holiday Inn that's sign promised wi-fi connections. I demanded a bath the second we got through the door. But the wi-fi was in all reality so bad that I couldn't tell what they were doing in the porn vids.

My cigerette pack had been left carelessly in my backpack outside the door. Damn, but I couldn't do it in the bathroom anyway. I think tile strengthens the smell of things. At least that's what it always seems like.

I rolled around in the bathtub untill I was sure mom'd be too tired to show me pictures. The place wasn't all that special anyway. A long road that leads to a ghost-town-like thing you see in the movies. The layout actually reminded me of a zombie movie. But I couldn't put my tounge on the name. When you think country you usually think green pastures and godly mountains right? Well the grass was faded jade and there were brown patches everywhere. The mountains had enough animals in them that mom'd probably demand I start carrieing a pistol with me. She's paranoid like that.

My Mother, Yugito Nekohi. That means 'Cat Fire' if you insist to know. Is a sometimes frisky but in all reality angsty doctor. After my fathers affair she got in contact of an old friend. I guess he's her godfather-family friend type of thing. Mom seemed anti-social and un-trusting. This guy was probably my own godfather too.

Worst of all, he had 'kids'. My mom wasn't the only one who'd entrusted their child to this guy. They were supposed to be two boys. One my age and the other is in middle school. Just what I need. Nerdy boys around me to make my life worse. Wha.

I got out and Mom had passed out on one of the beds. A whine glass on the end table and a corny Lifetime movie on. She hates whine _and_ Lifetime. She's just punishing herself for spending twenty years next week with a cheating bastard.

-----------Next day

We were due to arrive in the town by early afternoon. I was predicting five but when we had finally gotten off the 'red roads' and started seeing yellow fields and the radio started playing actual stations and I got to stop listening to my ancient P!nk CD(I couldn't reach much else) it seemed we'd be there much sooner.

In fact we rounded a bend and there was the zombie town. I was totally waiting for dead people to start pounding bloody knuckles on the windows.

Mom finally seemed to smile and she drove forward slowly through the streets that didn't seem wide enough to be car-worthy. Less then a mile up the road and we were driving onto a dirt path that forked with one way leading down and the other leading up.

We went up the right path leading up and it turned out to be just a really long driveway. The house at the end looked like a more colorful version of 'The Little House on the Prarie'.

Before she even had the car completely parked Mom jumped out of the car and the screen door of the house slammed open. A large man with thunderous footsteps and looked smaller in faded photographs ran over and picked my Mom up like she wasn't a full-grown woman.

Not that she acted like one ever. She acted like a child being swung around by him with her feet kicked up. I groaned loudly before deciding to get out the door myself.

I looked up and almost spotted the two boys watching from a window and the door but then I was attacked by the thick tanned arms of a guy that came off younger then his white hair called for. He lifted me up and I bit my lip to surpress a scream and he and my Mother laughed like maniacs. "And you must be Konan!" He roared like he had laughed. He put me down and held out his hand. I gave him mine hoping he'd leave me alone then. "Your mother told me all about you! But you were never able to get on the phone." He said looking at me slyly like he knew that I'd used every excuse in the book not to talk to him.

"She's alittle shy sometimes." No, I'm not shy, I just hate people. "Be yourself and she'll warm up to you eventually."

"Well I think I can pull that off," He said and then laughed again for no particular reason. "Come on inside! I can introduce you to all the roomies!" He turned around and I instinctively covored my ears knowing what he was about to do. "NARUTO! YAHIKO COME ON OUT!!"

The figure that had been in the window through it open. Out popped a little blond with as much noise and chaos as the last man had made.

He ran up to us and stopped looking like he might burst with words. He was about half mom's size alone. He had rustled-with hair that gave out a spike effect and bright blue eyes. With them next to eachother I heard Doctor Evil and Mini-Me pop in my head.

Mom spoke up again. "This is my old godfather Jiraiya. Naruto is his grandchild and- then there's another one?" She turned the last half into a question.

"Yahiko's the other godkid' " He said. Hand on Naruto's shoulder who was still looking up at me trieing not to start talking non-stop like little kids do. "I said COME OUT!" He yelled suddenly. The screen door stuttered open

My eyes widened alittle. Naruto and Jiraiya were both the epitomy of country people with tan skin, talkative demeanors and just that plain annoying-hill-billy feel. Before this guy even made it into the sunlight there was a diffrent feel about him.

I'm not good with hiding emotions so I probably looked like a gaping fish right then. But Mom seemed about the same state. The next kid that walked up to us kept his head down and had pulled his sleeveless hoodie over his head when he knew he had to come out. But when he peeked up I could make out carrot-top hair under the hood and then I got struck with the cement-gray eyes. He also had piercings. Not just the ears. but he looked like he could pass as the punk in my old school. He had a tiny stud in his nose and on his lip. He looked like there were even some on his eyebrows and I knew there was probably more then just the three shiney parts on his ears that I could see.

Mom choked a laugh and smiled holding out a hand. "Nice to meet you Yahiko." He held out a hand that had three silver rings. This kid was made of metal.

I bit my lip to hide some blush that I'm sure was there. He was cute. Cuter then any of my boyfriends back at my old home. His skin was deathly pale but he tucked his hand back into his pockets which I think was a signal that I didn't have to shake his hand.

'I want him' popped into my head like he was a shiney new toy. I could've laughed then.

-------------Later

Naruto finally let his lip undone. He managed to tell me everything about the town. Even a few things about Jiraiya and Yahiko that had earned the metal-cuties glares while he helped with luggage.

I didn't bother to understand anything the kid was saying. But I was listening. It was something to distract me. And he never seemed to notice that I wasn't interested in the slightest. At least he had a lovable younger-brother feel about him. I could cope with living with that.

After everything was inside and Mom was drinking tea with Jiraiya. Naruto seemed set on talking to me untill he passed out but then a phone rang. The caller-ID that was apparetly attached to his brain made him rush to the phone while waving goodbye. He then burst out a simular conversation with the poor sap on the other line.

I half-expected Yahiko to retreat to his room but then I'd noticed he was still standing next to me in the middle of the room.

"Nice to meet you," He said in a surprisingly authority-like voice. I could've swooned right then. I need a cigerette. "Konan, right?"

"Yeah," I couldn't think of a conversation piece. Nothing that would match his unknown intrests and still match the country-knowladge at least.

"Want me to help you with your bags to your room?" He asked, proving the authority voice had a gentle side as well.

"I couldn't deny it." I said with all seriousness.

He picked up four suitcases that I pointed out to be mine and managed to carry up _plus_ my backpack. This left me with just one trash bag which I was fine with. I'll pull up the boxes when he's gone so he doesn't give himself a hernia.

The living room was the main room. It had dark wood everything with a very homely lodge feel. With accents of magenta and dirty green with potted plants everywhere. It was connected to a bright white and lime kitchen that didn't look capable of holding all of us. The steps winded alittle bit to the upstairs hall that was a lighter wood color and had three doors on each side. It was like a perfect click of everything. five rooms for five people. And then a bathroom- _one_ bathroom that I had to share with three men and my _mother._ The longest bath-taker in the world.

Yahiko stopped at the middle door on the right. He opened it without putting down the cases and walked inside. I followed after.

The room was a pale rose pinkish. It had child-like borders and a light wooden bed. Yahiko put the bags down and looked at me with a shy smile pointing to the corner.

He let me look at where he was pointing before he said anything. There were about ten buckets of paint in the corner. "Jiraiya wanted you to be able to paint the room. Be glad you got here early." I gave a nervous-annoyed chuckle. I walked over. Maybe if I painted it black no one would bother me. But I was a lazy gangster. I'll paint it another day.

He handed me my backpack before nodding and leaving. I went to sit on the bed with a modest mattress and started flipping off the ground.

That bastard stole my cigerettes.

* * *

I'll end first chap here cause I'm lazy and I have shitake ta' say.

Yeah, Konan is the trouble-making steriotype teenager. Why? cause dammit I had no other ideas.

I'll say that all the other Akatsuki shall be 'unique' compared to the socially retarded children of this town... Oh, and the town is called Ame. Cause' I'm lazy and Konoha is too big a name. Konoha can be the state they're in.

This is alot like my Confessions of a Teenage Monster only darker. And I made Konan cornily sympathetic in that. In this she's-... Like the teens you hear about. Yeah, like that.

This town is like a larger version of Pony, Montana. Cuz' well- Oh geez.

I just realized that the dirt driveway leading up the hill to the house was my uncles. I SWEAR that was an accident. I didn't mean it XD

Does anybody know what movie Konan was talking about? It's a zombie movie about a buncha' people that stumble on a ghost-town inhabited by zombies and then they have to defeat them by stopping the cowboy leader zombie. And the heroine does it by dressing up like his dead sister and stabbing him. That's all I remember about the movie but that's what I thought of while I was writting the discribsion.

(Slight spoilers but you can still read) The next chapter should be varily longer with introductions of the rest of Akatsuki. I'm gonna make Zetsu a teacher-or-something. Along with Madara too probably. And Orochi. I made Naruto the annoying little brother XD. I've decided on the layout and The first few chapters should be Konan getting to know the Akatsuki. Then drama shall start.

Yes, teh dramah' Becuz I am evil. EEEEEVILLLLLL................

Next Chaptah' now.


	2. First Day Blues

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto or anything else used in here.

Yawn, what ta' say? lets see. Well Yugito's acting alittle like me. So yeah.

Some people will be out of character. But when the story ends everyone will be in-character. They are supposed to be developing INTO character. Like Konan is a teenagery whorey-girl that I don't like and then when this ends she'll be in-character....

Yay Akatsuki. They are amazing like a brand new home. Jiraiya's cool too. AWSOMENESS!.... I'll probably always switch from Konan's to normal POV. Expecially at certain parts. Like following the other Akatsuki home. And I might go to Sasori's POV at one part XD

I have a tendancy to horribly torture my favorite characters. Naruto might be left alone. Cause he's my favorite of the favorites. But then that means I get to get extra-angsty with the Akatsuki XD

...... I wonder if I can work Team Hawk into the plot? Nah' Too much work. oh well, I'll miss Karin. I need to find something for her. And I'm already gonna make Anko the lunchlady..... Like in Confessions of a Teenage Monster. bleh, I'm so un-creative.

I've also decided on the intro and outro's for this story. The intro is 'Everything back but you' By Avril Lavigne and the outro is 'Addicted' by Kelly Clarkson. I might make the intro on my Sims 2 and post it on youtube if you people bug me enough.

------------------------------First Day Blues

I set some things up before going back downstairs. Naruto was still jabbering on the phone while Yahiko watched TV and Mom still chatted with Jiraiya in the kitchen.

"They call me the frikkin' king of the town! My yard overlooks almost the entire area with every single house and all that shit!" Jiraiya boasted. He noticed me and called for Yahiko on the couch. "Yi'ko, Ya' need ta' show Konan. He can take ya up to the roof. Naruto's not allowed up there even though I know he goes there anyway with his hubbie." Naruto surprisingly flipped Jiraiya off but everyone just ignored.

Yahiko smirked as he got up. He tugged my sweater as he passed me to half-pull me up. I reluctaintly followed seeing Mom smile and clap her hands. She thinks he's cute too.

When we got to the top of the steps I half-cornered him half-stopped him at his door accidentally and took the chance. "Where'd you put my cigerettes?"

"I flushed them down the toilet." He said turning the handle and standing there for the conversation.

"What?!"

He chuckled, but I was too mad to swoon right now. "Nah, I have them. But you're not getting them back."

"Why not?"

"Cause' I said so." He said leaning in to make sure I heard perfectly. I tried to desipher whether he was keeping them for himself or trying to make it clear that I couldn't smoke here.

His room was hard-floored with a dark woodish-green color. The walls were gray with a surprisingly pretty detail line pattern in the middle with a darker gray. The room was homey and lived-in. With a comfort no kid in the cities room has. Some shirts were scattered around the floor and he had a computer on a out-of-character business desk. The bed in the upper right corner like mine was positioned had really dark gray sheets. Again,

The window was in the middle in-between his end table and dresser. Like mine. He hopped over a beanbag under it and out the window and held a hand out for me.

I took his hand secretly hoping my heels would puncture the thing. It was already riddled with duck tape but I smiled to myself when I noticed a end split.

The scenery this time of year made the yellow grasses give out a desert effect. A _deserted_ effect I thought. And it was true. I could see every single house in the town from here. It made me sick to my stomach. There wasn't even 100 houses here. Yahiko must've seen the look on my face cause he asked what was wrong.

"It'll be hard to get used to it here." I said. He looked at me for a few seconds thoughtful. He cracked a smile.

"I know how I can help."

"How?" I fought the urge to growl. But he was tempting me.

"I have connections that can make any lady smile." He said codedly.

I half-heartedly smacked his arm. "Shut up and carry my boxes up."

----------------Later

He carried them up alright. In just two trips. Had he been a few inches taller it would have been one. He had to take a sport, wrestleing maybe. He's almost tall enough for basketball but he only passes me by his 5'7 or something to my own 5'5. Jiraiya cut Naruto off from the phone which earned a loud groan from the latter. Jiraiya offered us leftovers since him and Mom'd talked so long.

With everything in my room I sat on the bed pondering. Once everything is un-packed I could certainly fill it. And still have un-needed stuff for the garage. But there was no way in hell I was leaving the room this color. And I was far too incapable with painting it.

"You could have the boys paint it for you," Mom asked, she's independant but anti-feminist at the same time. It's weird. She insists she can do things herself but always secretly needs a man around.

I thought about that. But Naruto would probably paint it twenty diffrent colors and Yahiko- I don't even want to ask him. He's too cute to hate but too annoying to bother.

The son of the devil walked in at that moment. "Paint issues?"

"Konan doesn't know what to paint it."

A little light in his eyes flashed and he kept smileing. "I have a friend who could do something. He did my room, He'll love to, I'll introduce you tomarrow."

Oh yeah, Jiraiya decided to enroll me before we even got here. I'll be starting immidiantly. Great. And worst it seems Yahiko desires to get me into his 'crowd' Just what I need. Socially retarded hillbillies trieing to be my friends where as I need to stay quiet enough to make them think I am.

Who knows, maybe he's popular, maybe I'll come up with a plan to ditch him. Or not, I could always go to Naruto's middle school for lunch.

---------Next Day

I didn't fall asleep untill 3pm. But Naruto seemed to be wake-up crew and I didn't get to sleep in. He tapped half-quietly on my door before opening it. "It's six, don't know how long you need to get ready."

"I'll be out," He's too lovable. But I'm sure in time I'll learn the strength to throw a pillow at him.

I got dressed slowly. I didn't feel like breakfast and depending on the horror Yahiko puts me though at school I might skip lunch too.

I put on a slightly skanky white low-cut. I can get Mom mad and alittle attention at the same time. Not that it would be non-exsistant anyway. In a small town like this my arrival was likely to be expected. Best of all it was warm enough to wear shorts. I trodded down the steps and into the kitchen and immidiantly took Yahiko's attention off his food.

Mom kept her mouth pinned shut. Naruto looked for a few seconds before noticably shaking his sense back and bowing his head to his bowl like it were a god. Jiraiya put my bowl out for me and then gestured to Mom.

"She get those from her father?"

Mom started laughing histarically. Naruto spit up some oatmeal while Yahiko only half-heard. But then he looked up to my eyes. "The least you could've done was wear a bra."

Jiraiya joined Mom and Naruto basicly vomitted. I almost did too.

--------Later

I waited on the couch for Yahiko to be ready. Naruto kicked the coffee table from his spot on the loveseat while he waited with me. He made tiny conversation but he looked like he was easing off his wake-up high and dreading school like a normal kid.

Yahiko came down the stairs in the same hoodie as yesterday. The faded jeans might've been from yesterday too, but I couldn't remember.

At the door Mom informed that Jiraiya was taking her down to the Hospital to see if there was an opening anywhere. They might not be back. Great, alone with 'it' and Naruto. Yay.

Two school buses were down in the center of town. It looked like every child in Ame was getting on. The low numbers once again made me sick. Naruto raced ahead and Yahiko took my hand to pull me down to catch them.

I rolled my eyes annoyed while also trying to decide wether to sling my backpack over my shoulder or to use it to protect any 'popping' from the running. I choose the latter cause I'm not _that_ needy. We skid to a hault at the bottom of the hill and wait in line.

Naruto immidiantly grabs someone who is apparently a friend and does his chatter-marathon. The annoyed-looking raven-head watches him talk mindlessly with silence that made the two clash violently. Even their clothes- light with orange and dark with blue- Made it look like Day and Night standing side-by-side.

"Where's your group?" I asked Yahiko looking for an end to the awkward standing while I made sure I was still in my clothes. Yeah, a bra might've worked.

"They're on the bus already." He said casually like he was always the last one there. He then pointed to a space between the two buses. Gesturing at kids in each one sticking tounges out and making faces at eachother. I couldn't make out faces but I knew I'd have to sit near one of them.

I caught Naruto dragging his friend over who looked about to kill him in embarressment. "Hi Konan this is SASUKE that is spelled S-A-S-_U-K-E_ and saided' SAUSE-_GAAAY_,"

The raven wacked him in the head. He gave me an acknowladed look and polite nod before pulling Naruto away to avoid actual conversation. Naruto made humorous choking noises and thrashed around as he left us again.

The buses were almost full. I noted that the few still standing were me and Yahiko and then a blond and a red-head. They seemed to be having an arguement on which bus to get in. I rolled my eyes and Yahiko actually did the same. He gestured that I follow him and in confusion I did. We got in the bus on the right and settled down into two vacant seats. He got the window seat of course.

Once all the kids were inside the buses both pulled out and backed up awkwardly- what they must've done nearly everyday. They then started going down the long road to the nearest civilazation. Which was that at the other end of the long road that had a post-office, the schools, a grocery store and a Cafe I remembered passing. Back then I hadn't known they would be the closest outlet for anything.

Before the buses had even reached the speed limit the guy infront of us turned around in his seat. He had gelled back silver hair and clear albino-like eyes. "Yiki, what we' doin'?" Yiki? That's a worse nickname then what Jiraiya has.

"Nice to see you too Hidan," He replied. "This is Konan, she's Jiraiya's other godchild that's staying with us. Get aquainted." He almost demanded with his authority voice blasting. 'Hidan' crossed his arms on the seat and slowly looked at me. He checked for a moment before pointing at my chest. "Yes Hidan, she has breasts. You can stop."

"Boobs," He said distaint-mindedly. He turned around in his seat and tapped the guy infront of _him_. "Kuzu, Yiki's girlfriend has boobs."

I looked around for a split-second and people were un-surprisingly staring. I was expected. A shiney new Barbie.

The guy infront of Hidan turned around. He looked annoyed. He wore a gray bandana over shoulder-length brown hair. He had bloodshot green eyes and some scars on his face. I couldn't really tell wether he was black or just really tan. He didn't look interested but wanted to see the newbie. He gave a half-hearted wave and went back to his seat. Hidan made a strange whining noise and hopped over the seat to sit in the spot next to him, which like Hidan's old one was empty.

Yahiko seemed to roll his eyes again. I looked around, most of the kids retracted from their previous stares. I looked back a couple rows and Naruto was on this bus. Still with his friend, chattering away. In the seats infront of them there was a deathly pale kid on the window seat and next to him was another cute one. He had silky long black hair and bags under his eyes. He didn't look away when we locked eyes. A few seconds later he blinked and smiled- like he just now realized I was looking back at him. He waved almost shyly before turning his stare to the ground.

His eyes were a weird brown color. Almost black. He had sunglasses holding his bangs back which slightly failed but added to the sexy silent demeanor... Maybe I can at least have fun staring at all the cute country boys at least. Yahiko it was alittle weird with since were Mom to die we would technically be related via' Jiraiya.

It was only about fifteen minutes untill we reached the school. Me and Yahiko had sat in silence the whole time. Hidan looked back at us a few times looking for an excuse to get close to my breasts again. But he kept his seat with the other one.

The schools were all brick with vines growing up them. Wood and chain-link fences alone seperated the recess yards from the post-office. There was a Elementry-and-Kindergarden in one at the right. It was close enough to be connected with the Middleschool. Which probably doubled as a Intermidiate too. The Highschool was tallest and at the left. connected to the Middleschool and a garage that held only two other buses besides the ones that carried us.

I stumbled out of the bus having to be led blindly by Yahiko. Hidan who got out just infront of us spun around once we were clear of the doors. "Yiki, what we doin'?" He asked again.

"I wanted to show Konan around the town, but we also need to get home and finish unpacking." Shit, and without telling me. How much is there to see here? I didn't surpress a glare at the back of his head that Hidan laughed at.

"Can we come?" Hidan asked,

"Yeah, fine, she can meet everyone else too." Who else? How many kids in this town could actually follow him around? "Konan?" He turned to me, "Care to meet the rest of my 'group' After school?"

I glared at him again, "Do I have a choice?"

"Not in hell bitch!" Hidan yelled laughing. The warning bell rang and Yahiko pulled me away. I wasn't half surprised again when he waved at the black-haired boy from earlier and the pale one. Yay, maybe a boyfriend isn't impossible here.

----------Later

Apparently either Jiraiya or Yahiko assured we would get all the same classes. I doubt it was accident that we were never seperated.

I was fuming when we got to lunch. I didn't have to worry about homework cause it was all stuff I did last year. Even some of the same questions. I slammed myself down next to Yahiko in the cafeteria.

"What the hell is this?"

"What?"

"We have all the same classes." I held out a paper the first teacher gave me.

"Most same-age kids do."

"When's homeroom?" I growled.

"End of the day. With Mr. Yian, why?"

I hadn't really had a reason, I get impulsively curious when I'm angry. It doesn't ever make sense. I groaned. When I brought my head up Yahiko was gone but Naruto was on my other side- still with his friend.

"Konan! How's the school?" He asked sounding slightly more childish then usual.

"Decent, everythings easy."

"Cool! Hey, here's Sasuke again, he's not really gay. Just bi when in Gym." Sasuke wacked him again. I smiled boredly.

Yahiko came back balancing two trays and set the one infront of me. "I'm not hungry."

"Too bad, eat it and be polite." He said like that now ment I had to listen. But the greasy cheeseburger did look eatable. And there was only a small diet A.W. soda on the tray. Yahiko had a modest chief-looking salad with water. Might as well stuff _something_ down my throat first day.

"Why's shrimp here?" I asked pointing to Naruto who I think growled.

"Middle-schoolers eat lunch in the Highschool cafeteria because we rule them." Naruto stuck his tounge out that was riddled with half-chewed food.

Despite this being one of the biggest tables in the room it was strangely empty. It clicked in my head that there were probably cliques' here too. Maybe Yahiko really does have half the kids in town following him around. (And how right was I in the end?)

The guy that was with Hidan earlier sat down across from us. Along with the two other no-names from the bus. But Hidan was missing.

Yahiko seemed to notice too. "Where're the others?" He said still trying to apparently scan the entire room.

The kid with scars looked at Mister-Pale before groaning. "Detention,"

"_All_ of them?" But the raven-head shook his head, which made his sunglasses fall perfectly down to his face. I felt a blush creeping up my cheeks again.

" 'Sori's around here somewhere." The pale one said. I looked back at him finally and all attention on the raven-head dissapered. He wasn't pale just _blue_. I think he noticed that I noticed cause he quickly gave a weak smile and flipped me off without anyone seeing and then continued. "That one wouldn't come to _school_ if 'Dara didn't drag him here."

Yahiko sat up straighter in his seat. "May I introduce those present?" Yahiko asked me like a gentlemen. I nodded not having reason to object. He pointed to the one infront of us. "Black guys' Kakuzu," He said bluntly. I guess anti-racisim is common sense in a little town where everyone is on equal ground. "The blue one's Kisame," I tried not to laugh when he flipped off Yahiko too. "Other is Itachi."

"He's Sasuke's brouder." Naruto said with a mouth full of mac n' cheese. He swallowed most of it and continued- "He's tha' coolest guy in tha' whole wide world!" Itachi and Sasuke both smiled without saying anything.

Kisame slammed a big hand down on the tabled and waved behind us. " 'Sori! get over here!" He screamed fifties-businessman style.

Regardless I kept my head down, trieing to decide wether or not to eat the food on my plate. I turned my eyes up when something tiny and red sat down next to Kakuzu.

He left a wide space between the guy and folded his hands over a notebook. With a thick red hoodie on half his pretty-chibi face was covored. He had short crimson hair and bangs dangling infront of his face. May I compare his femmie eyes to gold. I think he took a glance at me before I looked at him but now he had his eyes fixed on the table. He might've passed for twelve and the fact that he hung out with Yahiko was the only thing keeping me from thinking he is. Pink cheeks and creamed skin made me want to pinch him.

Dammit which one is the sparkly vampire?

I'll bet on Itachi for now. But the least I can do is try and make myself known and it clear I'm not going to be dragged around by Yahiko forever.

"I-"

"Sasori what happened?" If I ever get the chance to.

"Deidara's an idiot. Story over. Lemme alone." He said in a voice ten times more mature then his face. Which was now completely covored by his sleeves.

" 'Sori you need to eat something." Yahiko spoke again in his attempt of a loving voice that was dominated by the low pitch.

"Food is useless." The red pile grunted.

"Common~" Kisame stretched his arm over Itachi and Kakuzu to wag a fishstick near his face.

Sasori lifted his head up, but he looked at Yahiko. "I hate you,"

"You hate everyone Sasori, just eat."

"I wish for your souls to be locked inside of dolls." Where the hell did _that_ come from?

"Nice to meet you," I finally said. Fed up with just sitting there listening to them argue. The look I had certainly wasn't the happiest but no one complained.

"_That_ is the newbie everyone won't shut up about?" I realized I hadn't realized that people were staring at me like on the bus. Only now it was doubled. Good lord.

But pushing that aside this little twerp just spoke about me like I was smelly trash. I think I might have glared but Yahiko then put a hand on my shoulder. "Ignore him, he's Grumpy. Kuzu's Greedy. Kisa's Bluey-" Kisame held up his middle finger again and waved it around in the air like a flag.

Me not being the most subtle and sencere person. "What's with that anyway?"

He wacked his head on the table. Like he was wishing I wouldn't ask. Yahiko took the hand off my shoulder and covored his mouth with it. Kisame didn't answer but I achieved the goal of being known.

Sasori still looked at me like dirt though. Which still urked the fucking shit out of me. I turned my mind on him. "Do you have something to say 'Little Red Riding Hood?' "

He fired with pimp-like venomous comebacks. "Yes, you're a disgusting piece of shit and I don't like you. I don't like most of the people at this table but you're close to topping the list." He went back. Like he was recoiling more words so if I said something back he'd have just as harsh things to say.

I was tempted to but Yahiko put the hand back on my shoulder. Naruto was fighting a smile but everyone else was silent.

The bell rang then. Time flew by apparently. I grabbed the goddamned burger and took a giant bite before stomping off.

----------Later-Literature Class

We got to write poems. Which had usually been left to Art class in my last school. I was still fuming on lunch.

The sparks in my head went off when I noticed that just two seats away was Sasori. I pounded the pen on my paper- usually I just took a tune and made words ryhme to make a story. But his creative insults fueled my own creativity- I knew there was a whiney woman in me somewhere.

_Angel of Death_

_Hate fills our lovely eyes_

_and my undying rage spills over_

_distain, destruction, disaster,_

_But none can compare with your-_

_impending danger._

_Clutches around a neck so tight_

_blood dripping down my trusty knife._

_The vengeing Angel swipes down fast_

_to take out the devils minions' last gasps._

_Burn in your hell with all the fury_

_and then take my own life-_

_with my hands now dirty._

The class is small enough that we turn in our poems and are asked to read quietly while she grades all of them. I think Yahiko sped-read mine cause he gave me an impressed-slash-you're-a-pyscho-look when he went to his seat.

At the end of the hour when she gave us back our papers the teacher quietly asked me to report to the school Guidance counselor.

-----------Later

"And you swear you hadn't been serious with all of this?" The extreamly annoying old man behind the stupid fat desk said. Holding that damn piece of paper in his wrinkly hands.

"I was angry with someone. I vented it on the work." I said for the fifth goddamn time.

He looked at me through the thick glasses that magnified the eyes that were screaming 'I don't believe you'. I mean really, I knew a girl who wrote poems about killing her parents and herself. She never got sent here. She was just mad her Mom wouldn't let her get a cellphone. Is everyone in this town that retarded?

The man looked over the paper once a-_fucking-_gain. He then took out a pad of paper to write something on. My vision felt like it was turning red when he handed the two papers to me. "Keep your poem. Give the note to your Mother-"(Good god these fucktards even know my living situation)"-please refrain from reading it. You may go now."

I left the office before his last sentance was done. I of course opened the note right outside the door. '_Miss. Nekohi. I'm afraid your daughter may be in need of long-term pyscholodgical treatment for stress and possible suicidal/homicidal thoughts. Feel free with calling me on more information if Konan refuses to talk or starts acting strangely. The signs for clinically depressed children are-_' I put the note in the trash before finishing it. I stomped harder in the tile floors towards the doors.

Screw it all. I'll skip the rest of school. See if I can't walk to a close enough gas station that would believe I'm over eighteen and buy a pack of cigerettes.

I pushed the doors open- Kids were in the recess yard. I went to the right to make sure no one saw me. I slung the backpack over my shoulder not really caring about any of the books I'd left inside.

It was free period. But everyone was either inside or in the recess yard. I zigged through an alleyway looking for a shortcut behind all the buildings.

And I walked right smack dab into Yahiko.

"And what are _you_ doing here?" He asked like he was my babysitter.

"Cutting. You?" Blunt is good, cause they never believe you.

But he apparently did cause' he smiled. "Same, want to meet the _whole_ gang now?" He smiled bigger and when he spoke I could see his frikkin' tounge was pierced too.

"Do I have a choice?" I said a second time now. He took my hand and pulled me behind a overflowing dumpster and through a wooden fence.

There were places like this back in the city. They were always full of smoke and girls doing things behind trashcans for money. The ground was cement like everything else around the school. The walls were covored with moss and more vines forom not being in the sun, along with some posters and random graffiti. Trashbags full of candy wrappers and a surpriser-_soda_ cans-. Yahiko seemed to have his own little mafia inside here.

Everyone from the cafeteria table was here.(Excluding Naruto and Sasuke whom I recall seeing in the recess yard in a heated wrestling match) I was too relaxed here to be angry with Sasori's presence. Which was obviously expected, he was sitting ontop a dumpster writing in his notebook. Kisame was wacking a wooden samurai sword on the wall that looked like it was reserved for it. Kakuzu was the first to notice us with a nod while he used a trashcan for a seat. Itachi was ripping little pieces of paper up in a corner close to Sasori. Directly across from the entrance was a pile of trashbags piled like a wall.

I regonized the cheeky little asshole on the other side as Hidan. He had the controller for a remote control car in his hand and was right now having fun ramming it into my foot over-and-over. Next to him was likely the missing member. Whose gender I was leaning toward boy the longer I looked at him.

Obviously yes, but he still had bright blue eyes with thick eyelashes that are seen digitally added onto models. Bright blond hair that was probably reaching down his back with the right half's majority tied into a ponytail on top. A fringe covoring the left side of he-_his_ face topped it off.

By the time I was done zoning everyone Yahiko kicked the little car away. "Attention," He said with quiet authority this time. Everyone listened. "Can everyone give Konan a proper introduction now?"

Kisame turned from his area first. He put the sword to his side and bowed. Kakuzu grunted a hello and Sasori just grunted. Hidan waved enthusiasticly being a dork and I heard a very sweet and pretty seductive 'Very nice to meet you' from Itachi that caught my attention.

The last member jumped out from behind the wall and practically skipped over to me. "Hi! I'm Deidara," He said happily. His low sexy voice printing his gender into my mind. "Finding 'comidations suitable?"

"I'm already pissed off at half the population and I arrived yesterday." I said bluntly, maybe they'll leave me alone _now?_

But the giddy little member continued the conversation, he didn't seem to want to stand still cause he was fidgetting and kicking his leg around. "I heard your spat with the loving Sasori," He said in a sweet tone. Little-red-hood himself looked up finally. "Hn, Don't mind him he's just mad at god for not making him a pretty little irish girl." Sasori through his pencil right at his head which I don't think he bothered to dodge. Deidara playfully through the pencil back while Sasori heatedly through it back _again._ The little match lasted for who knows how long.

Hidan went up to us. We were still standing infront of the doorway so Hidan decided to take a seat on Kakuzu's lap right next to us. "Heard you're a pyscho." He said right off the bat.

I decided to be honest. Expecting these people to be too stupid to take anything to mind. "Is everyone in this town retarded? I wrote an angsty poem. So what? I want to know what the fuck Sasori _the_ _greats'_ said!" Hidan laughed. I thought I might be feeling _too_ comfortable here. Maybe I'm on a contact high.

I noticed Deidara spin around by his flying hair. He was still smiling from his 'game' with Sasori

"_Eternal love with an undying passion._

_Heartfelt confessions in sparkling rain._

_May our true feelings linger forever._

_Never aloud yet waiting near._"

A few prickles on my heart with Deidara's lovely voice speaking the lovely words that broke my concentration. But Sasori's cocking grin following snapped me out of the daze.

"Saso' an' Dei' are that faggy-ass 'artists' " Hidan picks earning punches in the gut from Deidara.

"That reminds me," Yahiko spoke and I predicted what was coming. "Deidara, Konan needs help painting her room." The perky blonds eyes lit up. Jumped over to us again.

"Can do!" He screeched right next to my ear. "Hnm, any ideas-suggestions-favorite colors-I'm not really gay Hidan just has a crush on Kuzu-movie themes-anything?"

Before I spoke I laughed with Deidara that Hidan hadn't heard us at all. "I have no clue, just please do something with it."

He leaned forward and looked in my eyes for a second. "Something to match a lovely personality and that'll go with beautiful hazel eyes."

Right on que the bell rang. Everyone started getting up and heading for class. Kisame patted a hand on my shoulder- actually wishing me _goodluck._ Yahiko took my hand again and led me out through the alley and to the doors.

I got out and with the sun on my face it hit me that I'd felt better. Best in a long time. I didn't think I'd be happy here. Expecially not after a day like this.

But I was on a high that didn't involve lighters and was entirely legal.

----------------Later

I'd calmed down from earlier when I got to homeroom. But the automosphere from the alley was in this room as well.

Yahiko gleefully pointed out the whole gang that took this class. Deidara waved happily from sitting on Sasori's desk. Hidan ran over to me first and put his arm around me. "Yo' Ko' "

"Please don't call me that." I said less pissed then I'm supposed to be. The high was back and I couldn't get mad no matter how hard I tried.

He laughed again. On closer inspection Hidan looks like a lazy jock. With beefy arms and about 1 or 2 inches on Yahiko. He has scars that blend into the pale skin- A cast on his right wrist that'd been hidden all times before- A crooked nose that must've been broken a couple times and I think there's a chunk of his ear missing.

The teacher apparently came in because I heard the door close behind me and everyone retreat to their seats. I turned around and jumped.

Yahiko quickly led me to an open seat (next to him of course. But it's also to the left of Kisame. Infront of Sasori and behind Kakuzu. Oh god, I'm surrounded by men. This feels like a comical harem.)

The teacher got behind the desk. His name 'Zetsu Yian' in big bold chalk letters on the board.

All we were supposed to do in here was review things. Yahiko said in the hall that Mr. Yian would tutor you in class on something if you want extra help. I looked up at him but tried not to stare. He was tall- about Jiraiya's height. Moss hair and bright topaz eyes.

The thing was though he has that what-ya-call disease I saw on the news where parts of your skin are black and other parts are white. His face was almost perfectly split down the middle.

But I tried to smile and do my work. Part of this high I'm on is I feel polite. I can name five kids I used to know that would throw papers at this guy.

He was lecturing on some of the 'voted hardest' topics the students picked. Despite anything from earlier I thought about Yahiko's earlier comment.

Kids were walking up and asking him stuff. I could tell the nervous kids that didn't look him in the eye. The high was getting higher and I started thinking how rude it was seeming.

A idea popped in my head. I plucked my poem from my bag and trodded over to him.

"Mr. Yian?" I asked- surprised by a shyness sound in my voice.

"You're Konan Nekohi right? the new girl." He said. His voice a calm adult sound with just that tad of husky you expect from someone tall. "Can I help you?"

"Well, we were writting poems in Lit' and I was mad at someone so- mine came out kind of dark." He nodded. "They took it all so- _seriously_ and sent me to Guidance. But could you look it over and tell me if it's really that bad?"

He smiled and held out his hand. I set it in his and he looked at it, like he was taking time to read it all. He smiled handing it back. "It has a justice-seeking feel to it. And shows you're alittle vain." Blush creeped up my cheeks. "But no it's not bad. Lovely really. Would I know who was the 'devils minion'?" He whispered the last part. And then I mouthed 'red' and pointed over my shoulder. He took one look and surpressed a laugh. "He's grumpy sometimes, don't take it to heart. But if you want to write something like that again just play it safe and fill it with sarcasim and opposite feelings."

I smiled back and thanked him. Then I turned around and went back to my seat. Most of the 'boys' were looking at me. Sasori had a 'what now?-I'm bored' look on his face. I gave him a wave that confused the living hell out of him and sat down. Thinking that I'd just found my favorite teacher.

--------------After School

Class passed swiftly and I had to sit there and mope after I'd finished all my easy homework. At the end of the day all of the group left at the same time, chatting together mindlessly. I was leading the way since I wasn't talking but Hidan caught the back of my shirt.

He pulled me to stand still next to him and I felt like punching him in the jaw alittle when he wrapped his arm around my shoulders again. "Yiki! bitch what the fuck'er we doin'?!" He whined.

"I want food!" Kisame yelled, and if we don't feed him I think he might eat Itachi (whom he seems joined at the hip with)

Yahiko once again rolled his eyes looking around. He raised his hands in surrender. "Okay, if you retards want to walk home that bad, we can go to the Cafe."

Some cheers that were followed ironicly by my rumbling stomach. I turned to Yahiko feeling talkative with the high blowing full-blast. "Walk? really?"

"If we tie a sled to Deidara and hang Sasori on a rope infront of him it'll only take 45 minutes." Itachi said. The hilarious joke that everyone but Deidara and Sasori laughed at combined with Itachi's rare voice made me laugh too.

I think to humor us Deidara led the way with a sprint towards the Cafe. The short distance didn't bother me as much when we started on a undeclared race for it.

The outside was square and old-fashioned. Deidara opened the heavy wood doors to a square room with a payphone. Then Kisame beat him to the glass doors that opened into the resturaunt. Right infront of the door was a single bathroom. Which almost did give me a cramped feeling. To the right was a short bar and a open door to the kitchen. To the left was the eating area. Small with hardwood floors and beige walls that had countless joke posters, fishingpoles and other stuff you'd see covoring resturaunt walls. The left wall was lined with five black leather booths and then two big tables were agenst the right wall. The whole gang went for the biggest booth in the far left corner and I got to slowly follow behind them.

They all scooted to their seats and I think it was Hidan and Kisame that went under the table to get to theirs. Yahiko gestured me over to the isle seat next to him. The ones that wern't still wrestling eachother for a seat were already banging on the table waiting for the menus.

This was quickly followed by a young waitress- fresh outta school looking. Short brown hair and bangs covoring her eyes while she wore a old-fashioned yellow waitress outfit you saw in old movies. "May I take your orders?" She asked about to laugh at everyones positions.

"Bri, this is Konan." Yahiko pointed to me.

She smiled and nodded. "I couldn't help but hear. Hope you like it here- or at least try not to kill yourself." She remarked. Must haven't of been born here either.

"Give me ribs, lots and lots of ribs. Big, long, juicy, thick, smothered, ribs." Hidan made clear.

"Water," Sasori groaned.

Yahiko handed me a menu he plucked from the waitresses apron. I lazily scanned the front of it and picked the first part that registered in my mind. "Cheeseburger." Wait, I had that for lunch.

"With?"

"Theee, tater-tots."

"Drink?"

"Pepsi."

"Phone number?" I opened my mouth to reply but then I cracked a smile. Yahiko and the other boys laughed more before finishing off their orders. The waitresses hands scribbled all over the paper writting it all down. But she was probably used to tending to them cause she was smiling the whole time.

She nodded goodbye and went behind a curtain that probably led to the kitchen. Everyone continued chattering and Yahiko tried to force me into the commotion.

"So Konan, tell us a bit of city life."

"Were you a hooker!?" Hidan screamed right off the bat. Country bunkins only hear the worst of stuff from TV specials. But he was getting close.

"I was trouble." I tried honesty. I could've lied but the high was making me honest. I probably would hate myself later but who doesn't love their own personal harem? "More trouble then most kids. But I got away with it."

Deidara tapped the table for attention, "Are those real?" I cracked a laugh at that one before nodding.

"I'm not that intresting. Please, just talk amongst yourselves."

"But you're _femaale_, hn" Deidara urged. Him and Hidan seem to be the most active of everyone. Itachi was sitting quietly next to Kisame after ordering only a salad. Sasori wouldn't talk unless to insult Deidara who seemed to greatly enjoy poking and prodding the little red chibi. His torture was amusing.

"Tell me about you all," I'm being absurdly nice for some reason, "Why's shrimpy so mean?" Deidara looked about to pop a blood vessel from laughing so hard. And I heard it loud and clear when Sasori growled like a dog at me. I made a hissing noise that pissed him off even more.

"He's just an asshole. Bastard hit me the other day, hn." Deidara said wacking/patting his shoulder.

"No I didn't." Sasori growled again,

"Yes you did!" Hidan was laughing more and I think it was annoying Kakuzu with the hanging all over him.

"No, I slapped you like the little bitch you are. Now shut up." He almost moaned.

Deidara rolled his eyes and leaned towards me over the table. He lifted up his fringe and up by his temple was a pinkish purple bruise. The skin was obviously broke cause there were scabs scattered around. Like he used something to 'slap' him. A pimp theory found it's way back into my head. I turned to Sasori, "You did that?"

Deidara sat back in the seat and Sasori looked at it. "Maybe,"

" 'Sori's a flippin' jackass, you just need to get used to him. Hnm," Deidara explained, but he was smiling. He let down the fringe and shook his gold locks around. He was shampoo-commercial worthy.

Kisame leaned towards him and put a hand out, "Deidara, honey that's domestic violence." Deidara started giggling high-pitch like a girl. "It's serious, he's not gonna stop." Deidara laughed more. "Sweetheart, no matter how good the sex is you need to get out." Deidara screamed laughing and fell out of his seat. Yahiko had his face in his hands and Hidan was under the table. I could've swore a smirk flinched on Sasori's face.

I turned up to Kisame "And why are _you_ joined at the hip with Itachi there?" Hidan's head banged on the table below and his laughing got louder. Itachi smiled and looked up like he was waiting for an answer too.

Kisame's mouth gaped open like a fish and he got really quiet. Which I think just made Deidara laugh more.

The laughing echoed on a couple minutes before anyone got it out of their system. Hidan came out from under the table looking like he just accidentally walked into the girls' changing room. "Welp, I gotta pee," Some laughed more and Hidan went back under the table.

"Hey, me fir-" Kakuzu tried to call. Hidan pulled him under the table with him. Hidan emerged and started walking for the bathroom. Hidan was almost there but...

Kakuzu crawled awkwardly out from under the table. He ran and jumped up on one of the tables and then jumped ahead of Hidan shoving him into the wall and making it to the bathroom first. Hidan regained his self and stared wide-eyed at the door. "Dude! bitch what the fuck was that?!"

Hidan started banging franticly on the door asking to pee and managing to shove every curseword possible into the sentances. Deidara wasn't making it back into his seat and was still rolling on the floor. I had to laugh aloud at just how ridiculous it is. Hidan kept banging on the door and whining and doing pee dances.

The entrance door opened and low-and-behold little Naruto was there. He had Sasuke in tow along with a cherry-petal haired girl bringing up the rear. Hidan waved smiling for a moment but then comically went back to screaming at the door. The three sat down at one of the tables.

"Are twelve-year-olds allowed to dine alone here?" I asked Yahiko while still smiling at Hidan's antics.

"In small towns pedophiles don't exsist." Yahiko said in a way that he was trieing to make it obvious that wasn't true. Naruto waved his hands in the air trieing to get our attention like he wasn't half a foot away. "How much money you got Naruto?" Yahiko said knowing full-well he was broke.

Naruto's hands retreated to his pockets. He sat down looking blank like he didn't hear us. Sasuke spoke up, "Sakura's paying."

"Yea, yea, yea," The girl groaned taking a menu that was hanging on the wall. This one had country girl essance. The good kind. The kind that are 'daddys girl' and country singers write songs about.

The same waitress Bri came out with her notepad again. Taking their orders, ramen, rice and sweet pork. Bri waved to us as she went back behind the curtain.

Meanwhile Deidara'd finally made it back to his seat. Sasori pulled him up by the arm which would have looked rougher had it not been the size thing. Hidan was banging his head on the door still shaking his hips around.

Then another group came through the doors. Obvious christian-pacifists, even the father had a cross around his neck. They gave Hidan and then us dirty looks that in the city would have caused a automatic fight.

They picked the booth farthest from us. I could imagine why you wouldn't want to sit too close to a gang of rowdy teenagers. But boys are boys, their two angel-looking children will probably be the same someday.

Hidan's voice was getting quieter untill the entrance opened once again. Kakuzu walked back to our booth earning open-mouths and stares. Expecially from Hidan. Who suceeded in making the other family get more anger with our presense.

"Fucking shit," Was the first thing he said, I covored my mouth, almost embarressed by the commotion I was predicting, "Goddamn bastard ass-wipe motherfucker. Hidan started banging on the door by the time Kakuzu got to the booth. But me and Yahiko moved to let him in this time. "Holy shit you fucking bitch-little whiney cunt." Hidan tried the door. Locked from the inside. I did that once at a party to piss everyone off. Hidan started to get crazy banging the door trieing to break it down. He stopped everything for the moment and actually thought about it. "Be right back." He ran out the door. Oh good lord.

Everyone was chattering hushly amongst themselves. The topic of the prank was even going on at Naruto's table. The kids at the familys table were obviously curious about it but the parents were keeping their mouths shut.

I heard the commotion from inside and then after a couple minutes the flush. Hidan kicked the door open and ran back to us. "You goddamn little bastard bitch fucker." Hidan's colorful mouth kept rambling as he dove under the table and attacked Kakuzu from below.

The two half-wrestled for a minute untill Hidan apparently got either bored or tired and went back to his seat right next to Kakuzu like nothing happened. By then Bri had gotten to the familys table.

Instead of going back to the curtain when she was done she appered at ours. "The family at the bottom want you to leave." She whispered smiling awkwardly.

* * *

Bri=Briana

I'm the waitress. Yeah, I'm that annoying mary-suey XD

The chapter was getting uber-long so I stopped it here. It can pick up next chapter.

I don't recall the exact name of the Cafe in Pony Montana that my Mother did infact work at (before the mean chief kept making her leave crying and the catholic owner started spreading rumors about her) But that's what the place is based off of.

Not sure of what else to say.... hm, Akatsuki are awsome. Amazing, cool, epic, hm. Running out of crap to say.

Oh, but PS: The soul reason this thing is rated M is because of Hidan's 'colorful' mouth XD


	3. Misfit Toys

DISCLAIMER:For the five thousandth' time I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else really in this story. I own background characters, Bri. And those 2 poems.

Yawn. What to say?

Drama might not start for a few more chapters. I mean, there's some depressing stuff throughout the whole thing. But nothing will get "ZOMG HOW COULD U DO TAHT 2 MAH DEIDEI?!" Untill like chapter six... I dunno, I don't have it 'laid out' like I had with Confessions of a Teenage Monster. I just write and end the chapters when things start to drag on.

I might make a sort-of sequel. You people can tell me if I should. This'll end on a epilouge that skips ahead to graduation. I'll tell you that much. But yeah. This story is supposed to show that it is possible to believe in anything.... Mwah.

I'm trieing to get alot of it to sound like an actual book. Tell me if I'm doing well at all. But yeah, I'll have one whole chapter that 'follows' the other Akatsuki home. Just to really get a grasp on what their orgins are for this story.

Yawn. nothing more to say. (I complain and ramble just like Masashi Kishimoto's authors notes don't I? XD I feel so proud of myself.)

----------------------Misfit Toys

"Oh you fucking little bitch," Hidan said staring at her. "We just got here we haven't even fuckin' eaten yet!"

"Wonder why they complained," Kakuzu groaned glaring at Hidan.

"Hey it's your fault cunt," Hidan shouted quietly(if there's such a thing) at him.

A priceless moment down at the family's table "Mommy what's 'cunt' mean?"

Naruto spit up the complimentry water and Sasuke and the girl had their faces in their hands. Yahiko was purple while he used his free hand to beckon everyone to get up.

"Dude we're not seriously gonna go _now_ are we?"

"Get out Hidan," Yahiko spoke with his head still down.

On the way out Hidan made sure to get the familys attention and to flip them off with both hands. Yahiko grabbed his hands and pulled him out faster. When we were out I caught up to him "Now what?"

"Just wait," Yahiko led me and the others back to the alley. The sun was going down making the shadows even darker. But Itachi took out a lighter and lighted candles I hadn't noticed in the daylight.

Yahiko sat me down with him in one of the more comfortable trashbags-slash-chairs. Everyone moped for a while silently. Yahiko had his face in his hands still and the only noise was Kakuzu quietly lecturing Hidan.

A knock on the wood and the waitress came out. "Special delivery?" I smiled graciously when I got up to help her with the eight-or-so to-go boxes with eveyones names on them.

"How'd you-"

"All the time. They get kicked out for laughing too much and I sneak the leftovers out with the extra break the chief hates me for taking." She smiled. Hair falling away for a second for the candles to light up a sparkling blue eye. I put the boxes on the ground for everyone to sort out. "Hidan, extra BB'n'Q sause for the restless." She handed him.

"Ah' you know you're my favorite bitch~" He cooed taking it and immidiantly dumping the whole bottle on his meal.

"Bri please make sure Sasuke gets back okay." Itachi said. Sounding like a genuinely worried older brother.

"I'll keep an eye on him. You all take care of yourselves now." She called blowing a kiss before leaving.

When she left the mood was back and the candles made it light up like daytime. Kisame was wacking his wood sword on the ground while he ate his Lobster like a barbarian. Next to him (still) Itachi was nibbling his salad.

Sasori sucked on a bottle of water(like a baby bottle. L.O.L.) while Deidara seemed to be trieing to despretly get him to bite his dumplings. Which the way I just worded that is humorful.

Kakuzu still managed to lecture Hidan through chomping teeth. Hidan had sause dripping down his chin like good-smelling blood. Who knows? maybe they're _all_ sparkly vampires.

My burger was greasier then the one from lunch. So while I choked it down I shared the tots' with Yahiko. After that I could hear everyone speaking up and joking again. The dinner went by fast and everyone through the garbage in one of the bags.

Kakuzu apparently volenteered to use the last of Sasori's water to hose Hidan down. Who was hilariously covored with BBQ sause from ears to hips. After using Kisame's shirt as a towel Yahiko ordered everyone to start heading out.

Deidara dragged Sasori and Hidan dragged Kakuzu ahead full-speed. Yahiko had to go up to try and control them like the leader he apparently is.

That left me in the back with Itachi and Kisame. "What do you use that sword for samurai?" I beckoned.

He held it up and twirled it in the air alittle. "I give sword-using classes for spare change. My dad used to be a proffessional in school and he taught me."

"Sound like a nice hobbie,"

"It's something to do. And I like collecting and using the diffrent swords-" He continued. I knew I'd hit a intrest point and he would go on for a bit. But at the first break Itachi spoke.

"How has your first day been?" Itachi asked me.

I tried to wonder. I certainly wasn't feeling normal. At least I didn't feel like I usually did. Maybe it's the harem of cute guys or something but it's all just making me so-... Dare I say happy again. "It's been great I guess," I tried to find the right words. "Not what I expected in the least. I thought kids here would be more gossipy and awkward."

Kisame talked again, "They are. We're just the misfits that don't fit in." Kisame said, and I sensed a piece of seriousness in his husky voice.

"But we're not misfits if there are other misfits to be with." Itachi turned to me. An angelic smile plastered on his face. "I think you know that."

Flutters on my heart and pride. What the hells' wrong with me?

Yahiko had Deidara and Hidan in his form of 'timeout' (Him sitting on the two of them while they whined and called fruitlessly for their seme's) Sasori and Kakuzu stood on the sidelines waiting for the rest of us to catch up.

Kisame laughed at their predicament. "Now, lets see if the little city girl has the toughs to walk ten miles."

"It's really ten miles?"

"Should we hold down Sasori?" Itachi reffered to the joke earlier, Hidan instantly agreed but Yahiko called us to start walking.

I _think_ I can make it.

------Later

The suns almost completely down. I have no flippin' idea how long we've been walking but I'm glad I wore flats today. A few of the things I've learned though are-

Deidara seems to be addicted to pestering Sasori. Whom seems intent on killing Deidara someday. At least that was one of the threats after Deidara started grabbing at his shirt.

Yahiko is certainly the leader wether he wants to be or not. He's leading the troup and gets mad whenever Deidara runs ahead of him.

Hidan- despite being one of the most active of the group- Is extreamly slow. He's about ten feet behind me and Kakuzu is apparently his babysitter. As he is back there with him- silent. But I think the vibe is simular to Sasori's.

And finally, I'm walking with Itachi and Kisame. Who have the supreme ability to talk about little things and ordinary topics without any sign of getting bored.

The only time this route was halted was when Deidara would come back here to conversate with us or Hidan would attempt to sprint up to us only to fall back a couple minutes later. And then one time when Bri drove past and Naruto waved his hands out the car like a lunatic. You could see that poor girl Sakura's blush from inside the car.(What? I used to be popular. I'm good at remembering everyones names.)

It was the same scenery the whole walk. But now we finally got to a big tree on the left side of the road. The scene reminded me of the part in 50 First Dates where they go to the tree Drew Berrimore crashed into.

Yahiko turned around, "Break time."

I was slightly panting. And I wasn't the only one, Hidan was heaving all the way behind us and I could even hear Sasori up ahead. But that little spitfire Deidara seemed to have unlimited stamina. "How much farther is it anyway?"

"About~ five more miles."

"What!?"

Yahiko laughed at my reaction, "This little tree," He pointed one arm behind us and one infront, "Is convinently placed right smack dab in the middle of the road.

I stared at him like a dead fish a few more minutes untill Hidan and Kakuzu caught up. "Can't...breath...must....recharge....battery.....robo power turn off....activated." Hidan then fell into the grass next to the tree. Sasori was already sitting under it and Deidara now seemed determined to climb it despite the lack of low branches.

I sat down in-between Sasori and Hidan. Too tired to care that Sasori bugged the living hell out of me and Hidan was making me even tireder. Yahiko sat cross-legged infront of us. "Princesses need thrones?"

"Fuck yes," Hidan raised his hand.

"You O.K. Sori'?"

"Yea," He panted some more.

Kakuzu seemed bored and Kisame was in a simular but less hyper state as Deidara. Both Yahiko and Kisame kept asking Itachi if he was alright and he would smile politely and nod everytime. Sitting behind the tree in the most shade. Kakuzu and Deidara would kick Hidan at periodic moments to make sure he wasn't falling asleep. Finally he sat up with grass imprints on his face and started moaning conversations with the others.

Deidara finally jumped down and out of the tree. Although the landing was less then soft and he groaned alittle he got up and rushed over to Sasori with an apple. This doesn't look like a apple tree but what kind of fuckin' Einstine am I. Dammit right now I'm surrounded by sparkly vampires and unicorns exsist. Their leader is Charlie. And I'm reminding myself of a conversation I had once when I was incredibley high.

"Eat," Deidara handed it to Sasori. Who was still panting and took it without any complaints this time. Wow, a first when I've just met him. Cool.

"Say 'aye' when you're ready to start again," Yahiko called.

"Aye!": Deidara

"Ayeaye!": Kisame

"Aye,": Itachi

"Ugh,": Kakuzu and Sasori.

Hidan just flipped him off. I sat there feeling awkward. It's not that I don't feel myself it's just that I don't know _why_ I feel myself and why I'm so comfortable with the friggin' misfits of the tiniest town in the world.

I think it must've been fifteen minutes before everyone finally said 'aye' and Hidan was forced into getting up. But this time Yahiko took my hand to keep me going. I wasn't slowing down, just exausted period.

Everyone was trying to keep in a close pack this time around. But this involved Deidara dragging Sasori _and_ Hidan and I think Kisame was pushing Itachi. Or maybe he's just checking out his ass. I dunno, I keep forgetting to.

--------------Later

We finally reared the bend into the town. The first few buildings were abandoned things or little family markets. I could see Jiraiya's house from here. So now Yahiko just needs to drag me up the hill.

Or maybe Naruto can do it. He was on the front porch and now he's running down the drive with Sasuke in tow towards us.

The race ended with the two tackling eachother at the finish line. They wrestled around in the dirt for a couple minutes while Deidara and Hidan cheered them on. It ended with Sasuke jabbing Naruto hard in the stomach and Naruto recoiling with a weak kick to Sasuke's leg.

Sasuke popped up and took his spot next to his brother. Yahiko helped the moaning Naruto up who comensed in a battle of sticking out tounges with Sasuke.

The sun was still 'setting'. At this angle the mountains were reveiling it again. But it was still pretty dark. Just some people sitting outside the bar were in the street. "This is the crossroads?" I asked.

"I'll be leaving now," Was Kakuzu's form of a 'yes'

"Kuzuy where's my hug!?" Hidan went after him.

"Didn't your sister tell you to stop staying out after dark?"

"She's not my sister!" He boasted, " She's just a really hot chick who lives in my house and that I'm not allowed to fuck." He said bluntly. After those two parted ways. Kakuzu went down an alley that was a shortcut to a little area with two or three houses on it and Hidan went to the left of the fork in the road and down the hill.

Itachi waved goodbye to us and him and Sasuke dissapered behind the buildings. Kisame gave us the peace sign before walking up a side street that went to a line of suburb-type houses.

"SASORIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!" A crackling old-woman voice screamed from the direction Kisame was heading. May I note the priceless look on Sasori's face right now. "GET YOUR ASS HOME I CAN SEE YOUUU!!!!!"

"I'm coming!" Sasori hurried his way up the path Kisame went(who is laughing at his neighbors dismay) "God woman take your pills and die already!" Was the last bit I heard from him.

"That was Sori's grandmummy. hnm," Deidara declared, then I think we remembered the agreement at the same time. "You have paint?"

Right, the room. "There's some buckets up there. I'm not sure of what though,"

"Can' manage."

"Deidara's staying over again!?" Naruto called excitedly.

"Yes, but you guys can't play video games all night okay? It's Monday you need to be asleep by midnight." Yahiko explained.

"Okayokayokay let's go!" Naruto led the way up the street and to the house. Deidara chased after him quickly and me and Yahiko made up the rear laughing quietly at them.

--------Inside

The first thing I heard when we walked into the house was Mom and Jiraiya's laughing. Naruto ran up the steps calling the news with Deidara. Which was followed by Deidara chasing after him yelling the same thing.

We of course had to follow them up. Apparently Mom and Jiraiya decided to paint her room too. It was a pale green inside and they were covored with the color. Mom for some reason had her hair down even though a ponytail is reason for painting. She still had the clothes on from when they left too. But to be honest her smile is reason enough to not tease her.

"Yugito this is Deidara, he came to paint Konan's room so all three of you will be on the couches tonight." Yahiko said like the kind little gentlemen his apperance denied.

Mom shook hands with him and then stepped out to show the room. "Please do a better job then I do," Deidara laughed and walked in.

"Perfectly fine for a amature and a Jiraiya." Jiraiya tried for a noggie but tiny Deidara slipped under him and came out. "Take me to your room."

Yahiko opened my door and Deidara ran inside with his spitfire speed. I followed after and he was circling the room like a vulture. Hopping over the boxes in the middle of the room and twirling around to get it at all angles. "Is it savable?" I asked

Deidara put on a serious face, "If we operate quickly. But it's not as bad as Yahiko's room that used to have blue waves and happy duckies." I laughed alittle looking at Yahiko who decided to then _duck_ out of the room. I turned around to catch Deidara hopping over to the paint cans. He scanned them all and the looked up at me. "I have a good idea." He said, then he ran over to my bed and started pulling the endtable talking to the knick-knacks I put there not to fall over. He then scooched the bed into the middle and then the dresser that was on the other side. Leaving a island of boxes and furnature in the middle.

He took some tools that were with the paint cans. His bookbag that was pretty small for a school bag was put to the side. He dug through pulling out schoolbooks and papers and got a bag of paintbrushes and put them on the box island. Putting everything back in his bag which he slung onto the bed. He pulled two paint cans over before stopping. "What color are your bedsheets?"

"Uh, like a white-blue pale color?" I got from my Dad when Mom for some reason insisted he get me something for my birthday. Even though my room had been yellow.

He clapped his hands together "Perfect." Yahiko came back with a couple bowls and through them over to him. Deidara clapped his hands again and got a spoon that was in the bag with the brushes and started mixing the paint. "You can watch if you want." He called finally looking up from stirring.

Yahiko was still in the doorway watching like a parent. "He says that but if he messes up the tiniest bit he starts throwing temper tantrums." Deidara glared up at him in a pout almost too cute to adore.

I left the room to leave him to the work. Ironicly Deidara then closed the door. And I started to worry on what he would do.

"What's it gonna look like now?" I asked Yahiko. My attitude tuning up with the high tuning down.

"You heard what he said, my room used to be waves and duckies."He said, turning to go to his room and practicly begging me to follow.

I went into his room again. Now it could match more with his leader personality. I looked closer at the walls to try and expect my own turn-out.

Apon closer inspection I could see that at the bottom of the dark gray pin-stripe lines there was dark gray waving grass at the bottom. With little specs leading up to the lines. I looked all around the room just-... looking really.

"Anything?" Yahiko asked.

"I'm not _worried_ right now." I said looking at all the pretty detail. "I'm just extreamly curious."

Yahiko chuckled looking over at me from his bed. "He's not bad. He can find personality in someone as closed and whiney as you."

I glared at him and he laughed some more. "How old is he?"

"First year,"

"What?! fourteen!?" I hadn't really thought he was exactly my age but not down there.

"Sasori's seventeen if you'll believe that one."

My mouth must have been hanging open, "That whiney little shirmp. Seventeen. impossible."

"Very improbable but extremely true."

"How tall is he?"

"5'3, barely" I laughed, good lord my view on life is starting to warp.

But I went back to the room. Looking down at more of the detail- He had to of used stencils right? but at looking more there wasn't two blades of grass alike.

I looked through it all a bit more. And I noticed under the desk a little signature. In a brown-green color just like the floor was pretty cursive 'Deidara was here' "Cute,"

"He does that to everything." Yahiko now had a magezine on his head laying in his bed. Some kind of gaming mag with robots on it. "Over half the graffiti in the alley is his."

" 'Figured," I looked down at the floor again. Like I might be about to yawn. But then I felt light headed. "Yi'ko?" That wasn't on purpose, I just feel nausous.

"What?"

"...I don't feel good." Screw it that I sounded like a baby. I ran for the bathroom and ripped the door of its hinges.

-------------Later

"What the fuck is that," I moaned into the toilet with Yahiko holding my hair back. Mom already checked up on me. And Yahiko told me the same thing he said to her that I didn't quite hear through the belching.

"It's a curse. The first time you have the Cafes' tater tots they always double-check your mouth."

"It didn't happen to you,"

"I've eaten them before. And un-eaten them the first time. Ask any of the guys. It happened to all of us. Even Jiraiya would call it,"

My stomach was empied out and I was glad I hadn't eaten anything else. Maybe that explains why Jiraiya, Naruto and Deidara all went back to their business when he said I 'ate the tots.'

------------Later Again

I was resting on the couch. Yahiko was next to me with a rag on my head to calm me down. Jiraiya's asleep, Mom was half-asleep on the chair-may I note that she got a job at the hospital. She'll be a nurse for the couple weeks and when she's proved enough she gets to be MD. Yay.

Deidara was letting paint dry and was beating Naruto in a video game. I couldn't tell what it was, Shippuden-6 something. The characters look familiar. Probably saw them in a magezine or something. It's all in japanese so you can't read the names or understand what they're saying. But I guess with fighting games you can just mash buttons relentlessly.

-----------That Night

Yahiko left me on the couch. Mom was fully passed out in the chair. And I got shook awake at about 2 in the morning. Well, at least I was _asleep_ by then.

Deidara hovored over me like a puppy. Moonlight from the open window seemed to accent all of his femmie features, and I wanted to tug on his hair that was tickling my face. He shook me again and I rolled over too tired to hit him. And he shook me again, "What?"

"Wanna sleep in your bed tonight?" He said in a eager whisper.

I let him pull me up and drag me next time I opened my eyes he had reached our destination.

The room was cold because of the now open window. But the room definitly didn't smell like it'd just been painted now. The walls were like a super-white blue and he'd even painted the trim a whiter color. Along with the wood on the bed which was now decorated with my matching bedsheets. All the boxes were moved to the side and I was able to walk to the middle and look around. The inside of the door was white too.

I got to look closer at the walls. There was a regular curved blue line going all around like waves and it continued the shape fading up untill it was nothing. Then there were amazingly detailed flowers with elegant grass that led up to long-stemmed flowers. The petals had the same fade effect as the waves below. With white centers. I didn't think things like that could be hand-painted let alone someone would take the time to do it. But every flower was diffrent and the whole place had the feeling of a white field. I looked at the someone that had done it. Deidara was in a simular state as me admireing his own work.

He'd unpacked some things. Little knick-knacks and a blue sued blow-up chair I'm not sure how he could've inflated himself. Even I always used a tool or the inflater thing. "You really did all this?"

He smiled spinning around the room still and nodded. I walked hesitaintly over to the bed. All the white made the floor brighten up and manage to match. I even liked how he'd placed everything. All I'll do is unpack the rest.

A yawn and I was too tired to think of anything else. "Thanks. I guess,"

"Sleep tight hn," He did a little bow and left the room. I closed the window and went to my new bed. With the covors around me and looking at the wall I wondered what he saw in me that gave off this effect.

------------Next Day

I slept but it wasn't much. I woke up with the sun. I laid in bed thinking about the extreamly active day yesterday.

As I'd predicted before, I started thinking of what had gotten into me. I should have told off Sasori and went to bitch-slap him after school. I should've been annoyed and left alone when Hidan and Kakuzu started the commotion at the Cafe. I should of been whineing and telling them all that they're deranged and to leave me alone.

I tried to re-think my thoughts about them all. Originally I _should_ have labled Deidara a complete fag expecially after he made this pretty room. I don't see how it matches my personality at all.

I also should have been relentlessly flirting with Itachi and teasing Yahiko. But back then I was getting a too-much-of-a-friend-to-be-more-thing from Itachi that didn't make any sense since I'd only just met him. I also should of tugged on why the hell Kisame's blue to.

None of it made any sense. In a way I guess I was kind of scared. On what had happened just there that was making me smile and think happy thoughts.

I shook my head out of this when the door opened. Damn Yahiko knocked on the wood quietly after he'd already opened the door. Now _him_ I could throw a pillow at.

He caught it with one hand and laughed. Then his gray eyes widened when he looked around the room. "Pretty, did he sew you a Princess dress to match?"

"I don't know what he was thinking."

"Well, you _are _a princess." He poked. I glared at him. I got up and pushed his fat-laughing face out the room so I could get dressed. Or maybe I should have locked him _inside_ to torture him. "Hurry up and change, me and Deidara are heading out for a walk."

Not that again. I don't want to spend any time with them what-so-ever now. But knowing Mom she'll throw a fit expecially after having seen the 'fun' we'd been having. She's just weird like that. She's cocky sometimes too- It's like she has multi-personalities.

I screwed looking skanky today cause I was mad. I put on a pink T-shirt that had 'B!tch' on the back. Then I put on a orange vest to covor that.

Ripped-khaki jeans and sneakers with yesterdays socks were thrown on and I decided to at least make it look like I wasn't a Hillbilly yet. I put a tie in my hair that wrapped up the outfit to make it preppy.

I came out of the room and peeked into the free-bathrooms mirror quick to make sure I didn't really look like I'd only had three hours' sleep. After willing away the bags under my eyes I trodded down the stairs once again.

Upon turning Mom was in the kitchen looking just-shaked-awake with steaming coffee in her hands. Jiraiya was trieing conversation with her to try and wake her up. Naruto was on the bleeding phone- _again,_ And it didn't take a genius to guess it was Sasuke. Deidara was actually jumping up and down on the couch with those ridculous golden locks pouncing like he's auditioning for 'The Man Show' credits. Yahiko looked rarin' ta' go standing by the door with a backpack and a long-sleeved gray shirt- _gray again._ And this time I know those are yesterdays jeans.

"Do I have to come?" I tried to sound as annoyed as possible without Mom hearing.

"Yes!" Deidara called falling to a sit on the couch. He pounced back up and actually ran over to _take my hand_ and drag me to the door. I pulled away without thinking and I think the expression on Deidara's face is worthy of being called a pout.

It dawned on me that Deidara's big mouth might get me in trouble so I added a quick- "I'm tired."

"Get used to it Princess." Yahiko took my hand this time and pulled me out. We followed the smiling-again Deidara out the door while Naruto waved still trieing to end his chatter on the phone.

It was luke-warm outside. Like it was humid but a tank-top would be uncomfortable. I think I must have caught sight of the tiny red thing down below walking down the street the same time Deidara did, " 'SORI!"

Deidara made a mad-dash and practicly _flew_ down the hill and _onto_ Sasori. That little twerp would have been crushed if he hadn't spotted Deidara coming.

Yahiko still had my wrist and was pulling me down after them. I caught Sasori screaming and cursing at a histarical Deidara who was on top of him now holding his wrists down. With all of Sasori's thrashing I started to really wonder if Deidara has a dick or not.

Sasori finally just rolled over and tried to crawl out from under him. Which didn't work but almost made me laugh.

Yahiko was laughing with Deidara when the little yellow tuff of hair known as 'Naruto' ran past us and over to Sasuke. Who was coming out of a broken-down phone booth when Naruto tackled him close to what Deidara did. Only the raven-head didn't budge and it looked like hurt Naruto more then him.

Itachi was sitting on the Bars porch petting a black-and-white australian shepard watching as Sasuke waved and went off to cause mischeif with Naruto.

I wiggled out of Yahiko's grasp and went over to Itachi. "Waiting for someone?" I tried a flirty voice but it wasn't coming out right.

"For Sasuke to meet up with his hubbie is all," He said with affection and a giggle as he still had his eyes on his brother. I sat down in the shade next to him- just giving up with the useless flirt and had my eyes on Yahiko trieing very fruitlessly to drag a Deidara-on-rampage off a Sasori-extreamly-pissed. I looked down and the dog had nudged over to me and gave me brown puppy eyes despite it looking ancient. "He likes you,"

"I think so," I said as-matter-of-factly. Scratching his black mane as the stinky old thing set its head on my thigh. I rested my hand on his neck and turned my attenion back to Itachi. "You going to come with us? Yahiko and Deidara are going for a walk and Deidara seems apt to invite Sasori."

He smiled leaning agenst the wall. " Like I'd have a choice, Kisa'll be here any minute and if Yahiko doesn't gesture us along we'll still end up following."

"What's with that anyway?"

He blinked his eyes but he wasn't focused on anything. Sasuke and Naruto were out of sight. " 'Unfortunate soul needs only to find other Unfortunate souls. Then- they happy.' " He quoted,

"What's that from?"

"I got it _first,_" He patted the old dog, "From Lady and the Tramp." I finally laughed on that one, getting less grumpy from his relaxed aura. " Who thought ten years later it'd turn out to be true?" He stood up and on que the dog moved to let me up. I got up next to Itachi and the old dog went in-between us to start down the road. " Bye-bye Smokey." The dog did a crooked nod like to acknowladge. And then went behind a building and away.

Itachi went over to join Yahiko who was now holding _Deidara_ down with a tussled-looking Sasori. I followed actually forgetting I was going to avoid them for the moment- goddammit.

There were other people in the street going about their business and everything. Everyone was talking and saying hello to every character that passed. Yahiko gestured us over to them.

Yahiko had arms and his legs wrapped around Deidara's waist, who seemed to be very-much enjoying the restraints as he still tried to scoot over to Sasori who was panting heavily leaning agenst a post. Itachi helped Sasori up and Yahiko was finally able to let Deidara go as the latter whined loudly.

Like Itachi had said, Kisame came down the road he'd gone up yesterday. Twirling what looked like a wooden sword all-around himself. I heard the honking of a car horn, the first one to pass since we got here. A navy-blue mini-van pulled up next to us and Hidan popped-out. Good god, they're attracting eachother like magnets. Like it's a horror-movie omen.

"Mom can I hang out with my friends?!" Hidan called to the woman driving whining like alittle kid.

"Hidan! but you said you'd come!" A red-head in the backseat whined.

"And now Ima' sayin' I'm not!"

"Go ahead and stay if you want to dear," His Mother called sounding like this happened everyday. Hidan blew a kiss and stuck out his tongue to the girl in back. With a wave to the other three people in the car he turned to us.

"What'er we doin' mah' bitches?" He called loudly. I mean- did he really just ditch his family without even knowing what it was for? 

"We're going on a hike-"

"Can I come?" Hidan interupted Yahiko.

"... No, not in a million years." Yahiko said dripping with annoyed sarcasim.

"I'll get Kuzu' " Hidan then ran passed us. I rolled my eyes grunting loudly and I think that's what made Deidara laugh.

Kisame had found his hot-spot glued to Itachi's hip. He looked so awkward otherwise. "Which way we goin'?"

Yahiko wiped his brow leaning agenst the fence that suceeded in guarding nothing. "How bout' our Princess Kon' decides?"

I felt like I was ready to kill him. Scowling, I noticed everyone was looking at me.

I turned around in all directions- how much could there be to see in a tiny town like this? I thought back to when I'd been up on the roof. "I'm not sure of where to go," I tried as politely as possible.

"Which is why we're leaving it up to you," Kisame explained slowly, like I was retarded and that was obvious.

I closed my eyes to avoid glaring. But the look on my face was likely to be far from pleased. And I think Itachi chuckled. I remember there being a patch of forest to the far right of Jiraiya's house. "What's in the forest?"

"Awsome!" Deidara exclaimed like that was an answer. He took Sasori's and mines wrists and started dragging us in the direction. Kisame chuckled like a demon and I swore that was Yahiko grinning in the corner of my eyes.

-------Later

On the way we'd zig-zagged through the empty streets and past some bushes. Over a makeshift bridge across a thin stream and through some trees.

I probably sounded like a steriotype bitch screaming and tugging away from Deidara, which proved frutile. But I was too pissed to pretend and be nice. The forest was the kind you saw in movies, daples of sunlight coming down through the leaves would have been nice to look at if we would have just stood still.

When Deidara finally _did_ decide to let me go. I had Yahiko pushing to keep following and I was now too out of breath to complain anymore by that point. We went up a tiny hill to a little opening. Looking back Kisame and Itachi were a whiles back and it looked like we'd actually been going through a rarely-traveled path.

The clearing was even more cliche. With the opening there were also no trees over head to shield sunlight. One thick tree was in the middle though, looking slightly decayed but had a tire-swing tied on to one of the more sturdy looking branches.

Deidara seemed to have discarded Sasori to the ground. He panted heavily sitting on the ground at the edge of the clearing. Deidara'd went straight for the tire-swing and spun around on it. "Welcome to hideout number two Princess," Yahiko said standing next to me. Apparently turning an old comment into my new perminate nickname.

I just screwed it and sat on the ground. Which set me right next to Sasori but he wasn't the one I was currently pissed at. He still had that damned notebook though, "What the fuck's in that thing?" I said with the first breath I caught.

He looked up, Yahiko had turned his attention on Deidara for the moment and Kisame and Itachi were making their way up the hill painfully slowly. He leaned over but didn't scoot which ment I had to scoot towards him if I wanted to see.

He flipped through the pages for something and stopped on one. He turned it towards me. It was a utterly lovely sketch of me 'pouting' at the cafeteria table yesterday. With the kind of shading I'd only really seen from the Titanic movie Mom made me watch. The only diffrences being that he'd added jewelry and more outragous example of my mood then. He'd also seemed to have added what looked like a rusted halo tilted above my head. It was a picture of how he saw me.

"Sweet," I said sarcasticly. Trieing to hide that I kind of really thought it was pretty. But maybe that's because it was of me. He gave a sarcastic smirk with glaring eyes back and flipped to another page. Raising the book again it was now a apparently old picture of this place. It had Yahiko and Itachi in the bottom corner but they wern't in as much detail as the pictures main star Deidara, who was hanging onto the same swing as he was now. His outfit the entirety of a glitz-n-glam punk rocker. With lovely shaded glitter and a choker to top it off. He was looking out to the left horizon and his pretty hair weaving in the sketched wind. Sori' even managed to imitate the sunlight.

"You like?" His smile was cocky now that I realized how long I must have been looking at it. I think blush must have creeped my cheeks because his grin got bigger.

"It is lovely, but you can stop smiling like that or I'll take my first chance to burn it." I tried to glare to get him to leave me alone. Unvased he went back to his business and turned to a blank page.

Itachi and Kisame'd finally got to the top of the short-but-steep hill. Laughing while Kisame finished pulling Itachi up comicly and turned to kiss the ground screaming victories.

I pulled myself up to get away from Sasori's still-grinning figure. I got close enough and Itachi was just right next to me. I tried to think that we looked perfect with eachother. Azure and raven hair and with his height about around Yahiko's. I took down my hair for extra effect and it perfectly brushed his shoulder to make him look at me. He still had a perfect smile from laughing but he looked back away from me and at Kisame who was playing with Deidara.

I pouted inside my head again, I'll try again later.

That was the scene for a while. About fifteen minutes of Kisame trieing to shake Deidara out of the swing while the latter hung on for dear life laughing the whole time. Itachi barely took his eyes of them while Yahiko stood by with a stern smile probably getting ready for if the rope broke. In the corner of my eye Sasori never looked up from his notebook.

At the end of that fifteen minutes loud curses and complaining alerted us of the last two in the group. I didn't even have time to brace myself from the high I got when Hidan and Kakuzu came into view at the top of our hill.

My head was alittle dizzy and had my vision had a color it would have gone from muddy purple to rosy pink. I felt a flinch on my face and the part of my mind that was still in the dark angry part cursed about smiling.

Hidan's bright and odd-colored eyes were almost glowing while he was in the shadows, and then they moved into the light. Kakuzu's face still had the annoyed expression of the argument they'd been having and if I had super-human sight I would have been able to guarenete that the shadow on his forehead was from a popping vein. Poor Hidan was panting from the short walk over here when he spoke "Thanks for waiting you buncha' faggots."

Deidara did a happy 'bwhaha' while Hidan came closer, getting ready to join Kisame in trieing to shake the blond off the swing. Kakuzu took a spot crouching next to Yahiko watching and it looked like we'd been here for hours.

"How do you guys _do_ this?" I asked absent-mindedly. Yahiko looked up, like he knew exactly what I was talking about.

"It's just natual. Ask Kisa' when he moved here. You get sucked into perfection,"

Kisame turned to me with a fake-sad face and pretended there was a tissue in his hand, "Th-the meanie kids-ies made-ed f-f-f-f-fun of meh~...." He whined and then pretended to blow his nose.

"I'm going to find out why you're blue." Kisame snapped up and stuck out his tounge- wow, it's red. I'm surprised. I looked up trieing to push the subject as far as possible "What about later? What ever will you do when you have to split up?"

It was in a joke tone but Yahiko and a few others gave me a confused look and Deidara cocked his head. Even the sound of Sasori's pencil was silent. I thought Hillbilly stupidity finally kicked in but Yahiko nodded and smiled, "Not gonna happen. We're gonna stick around and run away."

"What?" I stared at him. Sense was trieing to force it's way back into my mind. "You're not really serious, right?"

He chuckled while everyone slowly went back to their things. "We've decided. We would've done it earlier but we're not going to be steriotypes and drop out of school to do it. But the second Deidara graduates we're all hightailing it out of here together."

I got a good grasp on clearity by now. That's like kindergardeners saying they'll be best friends forever and then never see eachother again after Elementry. But this supernatural high was making me nice. "I'll join in on that."

Yahiko smiled and Hidan and Deidara cheered. Itachi smiled alittle and Kisame clapped. There's no way in hell that four years from now we'll go through with that. But I might as well make it good while it lasts.

* * *

Is Konan bein' bitchy enough? Cuz' she's SUPPOSED to be out-of-character.... Once again, she's going to develope into in-character.

Oh, and quick luvies to our dog Smokey who made a special apperance in here cause he's going to have to be put to sleep soon...

Also~ I've already decided that Karin's going the have a big role in this. And it was actually the day after I decided that I read the Manga chapter (480) where she dies....

....... RIP Karin, our favorite slut- may her spirit live on in stalkers and fangirls everywhere.

Now Sasuke needs to just snap out of it..... Naruto needs to give him a hug- or a punch in the face. Both'll work....

Tobi's a Bad Boy. (And if you're wondering where Tobi IS, You'll see soon... Well. maybe not soon, but in about somewhere within three or five chapters.... Yeah- He might apper like' six chapters from now- but once again I don't quite have everything planned out.

I'll give you a SPOILER and say that the drama-stuff will happen in this order of characters- Karin, Sasuke, Kisame, Itachi, Sasori, Tobi, Deidara, Hidan&Kakuzu, Pain.... I'm trieing to get every character into it- but Pain Kakuzu and Kisame's problems arn't as bad or in-depth compared to what I'm gonna do to the others. And Konan's dramaing the whole way through. But I am going to try and dabble with all the characters- It's not going to be very realistic let me tell you. But nothings supernatural at least. But anyway-

....Maybe Tobi'll apper seven chapters from now- I don't know. Anyway, LoveGunner over and out~


	4. Getting Used to Feeling

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or any refferences or things in this story.........

It took me a while to write this chapter.... It might not seem that long to you~ the readers, because i made the first chapters at one point but as I'm typeing this I haven't posted yet.... Why did I get into such a deep writers block that I didn't bother to look at any of my stories for about- _three weeks?_....

As dedicated Naruto readers should know, Karin's not quite dead yet. Actually- she should live. She is going to be healed by Sakura, Sakura tried to make Sasuke believe she was joining him. But Sasuke didn't believe her and told her to kill Karin. While Sakura stood infront of her trieing to figure out what to do, Sasuke tried to kill _her,_ untill Kakashi stepped in. And at this point it's Kakashi VS Sasuke with Naruto on the way.

Sakura was going to save Sasuke. Because all this time she's loved him and just wants to stop the pain. Because apparently, it's the only way.... I think I'll be chopping my hair off soon, that's what I do in honor of Sakura's heart.... Keep the fear and normalty of 'reality' and the thought of backing down and just giving in at bay- and shedding thoughts of giving up away, like falling sakura petals in the wind.

But Sasuke's being consumed by hatred- I won't say it's over for him, I believe too much to think that. I just know that he's right now completely bat-shit crazy.... So yeah, that's the reason for writers block, Sasuke is the reason. (Just like he's the reason for all the other problems of Naruto?) I haven't been able to picture him as that sweet, protective, ego-filled to almost comedic levels boy he used to be. I still think it'll be back like that someday. But things are still falling pretty dim. (Thank the lord for Naruto's hair, brightens things up and reminds us to believe)

The thought that Naruto might have to kill his best friend, and the whole reason Naruto stood up in the first place- I really don't have to explain any of that do I? Naruto found his ninja way back in the Mist Arc. When him and Sasuke narrowly excaped death that had been cause by the cold feeling of having no purpose.... Naruto's purpose is to spred the love and find true peace. But Sasuke has fallen and all he sees right now is pain, fear, and revenge.

But I know there still hope- why? because Sasuke _has_ reason, he's doing all of this because his family is gone. Because he's lost everything and the only way he can think of dealing is by making everyone around him feel the same. He's locked in delusions of himself being a avenger when that isn't what Itachi wanted. That isn't what Itachi gave his life for his brother to become... So on that note we shall blame Madara........... Sasuke's fallen and the only one that can pull him back up by now is Naruto. The one that understands, the one that knows his pain but can choose the right path. Anything could happen as he saves Sasuke- And he will, even if saving him means his death. Because Naruto can do anything, he promised to save Sasuke and he _will._

...................... ALRIGHT THEN! Kar-Bear should make her lovely apperance this chapter! I'll be needing to put in some filler crap before the drama starts though. Dammit, I hate making filler. This whole chapter is going to be something that HAS TO HAPPEN and it's all bunched together with meaningless filler.... Damn....

------------------------------------Getting used to Feeling

Nothing big happened that early in the morning. I tried to peek over Sasori's shoulder to see what he was drawing now. I think it was Deidara on the swing again with Kisame and Hidan trieing to tug him off. But I'm not sure how he could draw that when he never turned around to look at them.

Eventually Prince Deidara did fall, and Yahiko actually had enough reflex to _catch_ him before he broke his neck on the ground. Like a father monitoring their child.

Hidan jumped onto it next. He got a short heated lecture from Yahiko. But Deidara just wiggled around from his arms and crawled over to pester Sasori. Who happily gave Deidara a death glare that managed to give me goosebumps.

Hidan'd brought rocks up with him and began twirling around and trying to hit Kakuzu with them. He failed miserably and bruised my leg.

Eventually Yahiko held up his watch and signaled everybody. "Bus time,"

Hidan and Deidara(predictibly) groaned while Kisame and Itachi yay'd. They must've gotten bored with pushing the tire swing into eachother.

Itachi slipped out of the hole and his shirt flapped up alittle- yup, mind in the gutter and another notch on the fangirl bar.

We'd been making our way back down the path- I was walking in time with Yahiko who was extreamly considerned about the tiniest bruise in the world that was on my shin. His fussing that managed to tire me out despite me having just stood there the whole time.

We'd gotten out of the forest in no time. I was incredibley bored. We made our way down a hill and I could see the buses driving towards the town from the long road.

Yahiko had my hand now. He pulled me down with him to catch the buses and everyone else was in tow. Naruto and Sasuke held a bus to wait for us untill we got on.

When we did alot of the kids jammed into the seats on the left while we took most of the ones on the right.

------------------Later

The Schoolbus was extreamly loud on the way there. Most of it came from our group, but I could hear kids on the other side chatting about a schoo assembly today.

Great, what is it this time? Teen pregnancy? School shootings? Or taxes? they talked about taxes at my old school once. But half the kids didn't care, they don't tax you when it's stolen.

"What'ya think it's about?" One of the boys behind me and Yahiko whispered.

"I got money on~" I heard Kisame's voice 'umm'ing

"Pregnancy." I called, Deidara and Kisame- the two that'd been chatting, Turned to me. "They had them almost monthly at my old school."

"STD's and how ta' use a condom. Whip-ti-fuckin' doo," Hidan moaned yawning. Interesting, they know what sex is. All my hillbilly theories are goin' down the drain.

"We know who needs ta' worry about that," I turned away from them. A girl was chuckling with a dumb-looking blond while they whispered that. They pointed behind themselves with eachother but I couldn't tell who. I used to be one of those girls-

Wait, _used_ to be?..... What am I now?

---------------At School

Everyone split up when we got off the bus. I was noticably dissapointed while I waved goodbye to as many members I could catch. I don't know what clique I'm in, but right now I don't seem to care.

But before we arrived me and Hidan placed bets on either School Shootings or Pregnancy lectures today. Ten bucks is on the line. _That's_ all I care about.

I scribbled the obvious answers on my papers all day. The assembly was at free period. Everyone would gather in the Middle School gym to hear. Yawn, hope I win the bet.

Finally it was lunch and I could throw myself into something else. Maybe get involved in someones argument.

But the thing was, Yahiko ditched me for the flippin' _bathroom_ and I had to find the squad on my own. I wondered between tables for a while untill someone flagged me down. It wasn't them but I wanted to sit down and eat already. I've always wanted to eat something that could wink at me- so thank the lord for giving me meatloaf surprise.

I imidaintly regonized the cliche- it was the two girls from earlier. One was a dark-red-head with pop clothes and a beanie that didn't match. The other wore pink sweatclothes and was the bleach blond. There were two guys too. Basicly just your adverage raggy-clothes boys with unbrushed hair and one even had braces.

The red-head girl spoke up first, "You're the new girl? Nekohi somethin?"

"Konan," I said, now that I got to settle down I was mind-numbingly bored. I actually cocked my head to look around for a big blue guy or glob of blond hair.

"How've you been doin' here?" The one guy asked. I almost wanna groan.

"Fine, why?" Please, leave me alone. Am currently waiting for Yahiko to swoop in and save my soul.

"Just have no flippin' clue why you're hangin' with Masoc-hiko," Before that really registered, Masoc-hiko grabbed my wrist with one hand and my tray with the other.

"Have fun with _your_ friends Kagure' " His voiced laced with venom while those four glared after us and he took me to his table where everyone seemed deathly quiet.

-------------Later-Assembly

Lunch sped by faster- I swear they only give us five minutes to eat- We were at the assemply in no time and I cursed(pretty loudly) when I saw the people in wheelchairs and big video projector. Damn, school shootings. And I own Hidan big bucks.

He made me aware of that sticking his tounge out at me from the bleachers. He was between a completely-magenta girl and Kakuzu. The girl was rolling her eyes and Kakuzu was holding his shirt so he didn't lean over and fall out of the stands.

Yahiko led me put to the farthest and highest seats. On this side down below us I was able to spot Deidara and Sasori bickering. Naruto waved to get my attention and he was next to Sasuke and Sakura. In the bleachers to our right was Hidan still celebrating and Itachi and Kisame were-once again- right next to eachother chatting quietly on the edge of the bleachers. I found them in time for Itachi to wave at me before the lights dimmed and people started talking.

"What was with lunch?" I asked Yahiko the second I knew there were other kids whispering. "You went balistic." Well, not really, but ti was balistic compared to his regular demeanor.

"I just don't like those kids much," He explained. "They're the gossips of the gossipers. Everyone here's the same, but they're worse,"

I looked hard at him again, how bad could it be? "So you and the others are diffrent?"

He had a smile flinch on his lips. But he's not capable of more. "I told you before, we're the misfits." He was hardly done with that sentance before a loud clanking and a crash came from next to us. I metal pole fell down and clipped the side of the bleachers next to us. I didn't think anyone was hit untill some one screamed.

"Itachi!"

* * *

Short chapter~ but I decided to end it there.

I didn't want to put the whole beggining dilema in here anyway. Cause then it'd be uber-obvious that I wanna get the friend-making over with so I can torture them.

Okay, so in personal news. The dog finally died,(Smokey, he was 14 years old) My Aunt and Step-sister are moving out, so we might be on a tight budget for awhile. But mom's re-financing the house. And I'm not sure if they'll take the computer or not(if I don't post for a while that'll be the reason. But to be sure I'll be sure to put it on my profile if it's so.) My mom needed to renew her driving privilages today ('Okay you can go sit down.... Jacinda come to the front desk..... Okay you can go sit down..... Jacinda come to the front desk.... Okay go sit over there..... Jacinda window three please.... Okay you can go now.') It was funny, and then my ninja headband set off the alarm XD

Oh, and I FOUND A CANADIAN QUARTER TODAY! WEEEEE!!!!~~~

Okay, I haven't gotten ahold of the latest Naruto chapter yet. But I found a spoiler, (one that is ACTALLY ACURATELY CONFIRMED!) and yeah.... So if so- Somethings gonna happen soon, Naruto's gonna either kick mayjor ass or get his ass mayjorly kicked. The end climax will come soon. And SakuKar is gonna became outragously popular....

Kar-Bear LIVES!.... I think..... Sasuke, whatever you do, DON'T. DRINK. THE PUNCH......

.....ROFL..... Quote of the day: RESPECT THE PIZZA! (I really did say that just ten minutes ago...)

Oh, I just realized that Karin didn't apper- She'll be in NEXT chapter! guaranteed! (And no, the four kids that are Pain's enemies are not Naruto characters. And the girls name is Kagura, but that is not a refference to Gin Tama OR Inuyasha.... I just like the name~ is that so bad?)

PS: By the time someone answers this I'm sure I would have probably found out but does anyone out there have a Inuyasha spoiler for me? Cause I heard that Kagura died and I keep forgetting to confirm it..... Anyone?


	5. Forgetting to Feel

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto or anything else used in here.

Piece-O-New numbah' one..... I've renamed the Hidan and Kakuzu Arc for Naruto (Why was it called that anyway?)

It will now be known as the Shikamaru Shippuden Arc..... Haha,

Also... Finally, I've seen chapter 485

..... Naruto, you, can, do it.... YOU CAN DO IT! USE ANTI-EMO PUNCH! USE ANTI-EMO PUUUUUNCH!!!!!!

(You know, the thing he used on Konohamaru, Inari, Neji, Gaara, Tsunade, (kind of)Kabuto, and Nagato.....)

..... Yeah, Naruto needs ta' spin some ultra-Naruiffic magic and drag Sasuke's fuckin' ass HOME.

I need the happy ending soon, waiting impatiently every week for the next chapter IS NOT good for my health....

And I wonder what the hell Anko is doing? They haven't mentioned her, and she's after Kabuto who could be possibly turning into Orochi 2...... I miss Orochi......

OH AND PS: For cliffhanger reasons. Karin will be appering in the chapter AFTER this one. Okay? Sorry, it was going to be one long chapter but I decided to cut it in half.

---------------------------------Forgetting to Feel

Everything blurred together. The last thing I saw clearly before Yahiko pulled me off the bleachers was Itachi's brother getting to him in split seconds after screaming.

By the time we fought our way(Well, _he_ fought our way.) through the crowd. Sasuke was on one side of Itachi and Kisame was on the other helping him off the seats. He was holding his arm that was covored completely in blood. A couple kids started screaming and fainting. I was pulled along with them through the halls and sense didn't reach my mind untill we stopped.

We were two hallways down. At the nurses office when I clicked back to reality and wrestled my hand out of Yahiko's. But I actually moved closer to Itachi, now sitting on the examination chair.

The Nurse through down her magezine and grabbed a few towels and wiped away some blood from Itachi's arm. It seemed coated so thickly I had been thinking for a second that his arm must have been ripped off.

But when she wiped enough away I could see his arm clearly again and reality set itself back in my mind. I started to be able to hear people again and realize what was going on. A long, red straight line across his arm. It dripped blood but it didn't look deep at all. It just started below his shoulder and went to about an inch or so above the elbow. Itachi looked more exausted then in pain but everyone- expecially his little brother keeping close next to him- were being like it was frantic for his life.

Even cold Yahiko had his fingers on his lips tapping his foot waiting for the final result. He really was acting like the worried father. "What's wrong?" I asked hoping some clear words could help calm the situation down. "It doesn't look too bad."

The Nurse and a couple others turned to me. The Nurse smiled quietly to reassure "He'll be fine, we just need something to hold the bleeding."

Sasuke was clutching Itachi's free right hand with his face buried in his brothers lap. Deidara was in the far corner of the room. For once just a character in the background "Use Ducktape." Was what he said that was the only thing that got my attention.

Everyone readily ignored him and kept eyes on Itachi. Who looked up smiling weakly, "I'm fine, really."

The situation was still too coarse. I couldn't understand anything. I had to get out of the room to calm down, Itachi looked at me for a moment and I nodded my head before running out of there.

---------------Later-Outside

I had my face in my hands trying to clear out something in my brain to think about. I tried thinking about parties I used to go to. But all I saw during those were drugs on the table and beer bottles on the floor.

I shook my head to think of something else, but nothing else seemed to clean off enough for me to remember. My head was starting to ache and my heart was pounding fast. What the hell is wrong with me?

I'm scared, I want to be in there with Itachi. But it was only a cut, why am I so frantic?!

Yahiko sat down next to me. He was even paler then usual and probably resembled me right now. "Ko, are you there?"

"I can't calm down," I spoke softly, going back to covoring my face. "Why the _hell_ am I so _worried_." I gritted my teeth on that one.

His words showed he was smiling. Be it forced or not, "Women's intuition? I think you know what's wrong without knowing." I peeked a eye out to glare at him.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You're getting attached to us."

"Good god," I groaned, "This isn't some kind of warm fuzzy cliche story about bad girl gone good. What the fuck are you talking about."

He moved his head to stare at the horizon, "No it's not." He mumbled. ".... At least it's not warm and fuzzy."

"I said _what the fuck are you talking about?!_" I screamed at him followed by a growl. At least my anger blinded the worry.

But he didn't bother to look back at me, ".... Itachi's a Hemophiliac,"

I stared at him in what must have looked like awe. I didn't know what it was but I know anything with 'ac' at the end isn't good. "What?"

"A Hemophiliac. It's a disease where your blood doesn't clot right." He explained still with his eyes turned away. " If he gets the smallest scratch it could bleed for days."

I stared at him a bit longer, speechless, "Is he alright?"

But he was silent. "Which also makes him Anemic," He explained more.

"What else?" I said glaring at him.

But he chuckled, " He's also half blind, okay? and Itachi doesn't like us _worrying_ about it." He spoke like he resented it that fact.

I stared at the ground, speechless once again. My mind was lost in haze and I still couldn't think straight. "I don't like this," He looked back up at me in the corner of my eye. "I don't like worrying to death about people I hardly even know." I shuddered alittle. Yahiko scooted closer to me and put a arm around my shoudler. I didn't want him touching me but at the same time I didn't want to complain. It's when it actually was working in calming down that I had to leave.

I got back up and stomped through the halls back to the Nurses office. Yahiko stood behind me while Itachi gave me a welcome back smile as the nurse wrapped thick bandages around his once again blood-soaked arm.

---------------Later-Lunch

I avoided everyone all day. Pretty successfully too. I didn't want to face any of them and right now I was focussing on stradigys to never have to be around them _again._

But now it was lunch. There wasn't a table that wasn't occupied. My stomach churned when Deidara and Hidan tryed to flag me down. And so I pretended to be the only one in the room that _didn't_ notice them.

Walking in-between tables once again, I contemplated just walking really slowly untill the bell rang. Up untill the tug dragged me down to a seat at a table.

"There you are," The girl from the other day spoke. "We'd thought they'd converted you."

I rolled my eyes alittle, finally I'm free. "They almost did."

"I'm Kagura." She spoke, then gestured to the two guys, "Those are Gin and Furoshimi. And other lady's Akame. We got imported from the city too."

"Finally someone that can relate." I laughed alittle, this is how I used to act. "those guys were so annoying. It was driving me crazy."

"Have you like' _seen_ the things they do yet?" Akame asked. "Everybody knows they're just troublemakers."

I looked up honestly curious, maybe in my high I'd missed something. "Like what?"

"Everybody talks about them," Kagura started, "They're the idiotic misfits from hell."

"Sounds about right," I said, almost ready to laugh at the fact that she actually said 'misfit'

"Well for one," Akame started again, the two guys just leaned forward to listen. I think the one was looking down my shirt. "They're fucking 'leader' is some kind of maschonistic pyscho. His parents deserted him with that old koot Jiraiya. He does things like cuts his legs and pierces anything a needle can go through."

"And I think he's a pervert." Kagura said again. "That fag Deidara's their own personal sex slave. Stays in a diffrent house every night." A weird feeling in my stomach. He'd stayed at Jiraiya's. All he did was play video games with Naruto and paint my room.

But I don't really care if it's meaningless gossip or not. Just as long as I'm as far away from them as possible.

But that's when Yahiko touched my shoulder. "Leave her alone Kagura,"

"What're you whining about? She's fine. Ten times better here then surrounded by your no-account cronies."

Yahiko gave her a look and leaned into me, "Come on sit with us."

"Hell no," I snapped, the look on his face at that made me want to smile. "Not unless you tell me where the Nevermore is." Kagura and the others gave me a look that said they had no idea what I was talking about. But I guess it took me untill 'pyscho maschonictic' to notice how much Yahiko reminds me of Luis from 'Valiant'

Which was kind of creepy seeing as how the one girl from 'Valiant' had blue hair like mine. But either way, right down to the piercings and leader attitude. I'm waiting for this guy to start talking about rats. "Just leave her alone, see? She doesn't want to come." Kagura said.

Yahiko took his hand off me and stared at me silent a while. Then he turned around finally to leave. Kagura muttered something like 'good riddance' right before he turned around and looked at me. "You know, the worst part is when Lolli just up and deserts them all." He said.

My stomach churned again along with my heart. I guess it hadn't dawned on me that he could read too. Then there was the look on half his tables faces when he came back alone. But I turned back to this table. _My new table._ And listened to more of the meaningless gossip that Akame started on again. "And what's the deal with that blue guy? It's like he's a mutant or something!"

-----------------After School

I tried to annoy the giddy feeling that forced it's way into me during Mr. Yian's class. Akame was in the class too so I passed notes to her the whole time. It was pretty priceless to turn around and see that look on Yahiko's face and on Kisame's while he had to pass them. Sasori almost tattled on us but Akame put the notes in her bra whlie Mr. Yian searched her desk.

After school I practicaly clung to Kagura and Akame to keep away from Yahiko's group. We made it on the bus and I sat with them in the back. Akame whined when she saw the two boys from earlier had gotten on the other bus. But thankfully for me Yahiko's group either got on the other bus or didn't get on at all.

"What other stuff does those misfits do?" I asked, hoping something they said would sound believable enough for me to believe and shun them like everyone else did.

Akame smiled at the chance for more gossip and Kagura smiled that she'd offically stolen me. At least that's what it looked like through her maroon lipstick. "Well, the guy that swears alot is like a satanist or something. It's something like those guys from texas from really long ago right?" She explained, "What did you pick up on?"

I thought about something they did and how I could warp it into something completely outragous. ".... I caught the fag on top of me in the middle of the night."

"Ew!"

---------------Later

We made the ride back into town while chatting full of gossip. We got off and met up with the two guys. Who mumbled a 'yo' each before following us automaticly. And the taller one was definitly looking down my shirt.

Kagura led us into the bar. A giant wooden sign at the top that I never bothered to look at before read 'Akatsuki Bar'.

I groaned, inside- I guess Yahiko's gang really had gotten on a bus. They were all surrounding the bar. Deidara tried to beckon me again but Yahiko gave him a look that said 'don't bother'

Inside everything was wood. The bar was in the middle and shelfs of liqour made a wall seperating the other side that had a pool table. There were street signs and bumber stickers on the walls. On the entrance side, there was a single portrait that was a bunch of half-dressed women standing infront of a newer version this place. Great, this place was converted from a whore house.

Upon seeing Yahiko's gang Kagura led us to the other side with the pool table. After that she nodded to an old guy sitting at the bar. She led us to the other side of the pool table and stopped us to just stand there.

"He was one of my dad's employees. He'll get us something to drink." Kagura whispered. Akame seemed to be flirting with middle-aged guys at the pool table. The old guy seemed to argue with the bartender- a young woman with dark hair that seemed to be extremely loud. But eventually he got a bottle from her and Kagura led us out through the door again.

He slipped her the bottle while she went out the door and we left the place. I'd seen that Naruto's own group had arrived. He stared at me with his mouth gaping open while Sakura gave a dissapointed look. Sasuke was just clinging onto Itachi's good arm. That dog Smokey was inside and sitting next to the door.

He growled at Kagura but if dogs had expressions I'd say it changed when I passed.

Kagura sat us down on the same porch I'd sat on with Itachi earlier. Her and the one guy started transfurring the Vodka into a Pepsi bottle. Akame decided to talk more gossip. "The owner of this place's wacked too. He's on crack and has a record or somethin'. And he's with that group."

One guy actually spoke up. "Heh, puts beer in pop glasses. So juvenile."

You're the guys drinking Vodka out of Pepsi bottles- I almost said aloud. And then another think clicked in my head- forget any of Yahiko's group. But just looking at Sakura, who was sporting jeans and a green t-shirt today- was _not_ the type to do that or even let it happen.

But I shook that last thought off- what do I know? maybe I got a tad bit of high and that made me defensive. For all I know Yahiko really is hiding Nevermore and secretly doing it to manipulate everyone around him like Luis did.

Wait, that'd been Dave that was doing that. Because he was in love with Lolli.

When they were done with the transfurring, I made sure to get the first big gulp.

--------------------------Later

We'd screwed around in the streets doing nothing the whole day. Stumbling around and passing the bottle. The guy that was Gin definitly was trying to flirt with me. I let him, felt like old times.

Finally I'd stumbled in at around three or something. Of course Mom was downstairs, Jiraiya too. "Konan where have you been?!" She half-yelled at me with her voice cracking.

"I was with friends Mom," I tried to make my way up the stairs without her lecturing me.

"Yahiko came home without you,"

"Well I wasn't _with_ Yahiko Mom," I growled. At the top of the steps I spotted Naruto scrambling his way back into his room. He'd been waiting up too the little twerp.

Mom tried to say something else but I stomped up the stairs and slammed my door. I landed on my stupid bed in my stupid painted room. I glared at the walls contemplating scratching at them and throwing stuff at them. I probably would have if I hadn't passed out right then.

* * *

i am extremely depressed while writing this authors note. I just got back from reading elric0sis's 'A Bright Flash and Angel Wings'.... which is a story about what it might be like if the Akatsuki had been living in Hiroshima when the bomb hit.... it was extremely depressing,

now go my pretties. go read that story and bring a box of tissues.

as for my words on this chapter... I can't think of any.... I'm still imagining Tobi's face in the story.... and Saso... poor Saso....

go ahead and read the next chapter if it's up....... but I don't feel like talking now so you can look forward to a really long authors note at the begining of the next chapter......

....why the fuck did we have to bomb them?.......


	6. The Truth

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto or anything Naruto-related in this story. Or any Valiant-related stuff XD

Okay! I'm fine now! Let's see, what to say?....... THIS is the chapter Karin appers in! I PROMISE!

Okay, so, here's some FanFic reccomendations for you.

If you're a SasoDei fan you can go read 'In Time'. It's not totally Canon but I liked it~ I think the authors name was WhiteAngel or something, or I could be completely wrong and thinking of someone else. But the stories name is 'In Time'

Then there's the one that was the inspiration for this one. Convesation Hearts' 'Crocodile Farm'. It's a story about dealing with death and moving on to better things. In Konan's POV, and is the reason this story was born, and why this story has Sasori in hoodies and Itachi with sunglasses XD

Then there's the story that made me so depressed and caused me to spend the whole day moping. Elric0Sis's 'A Bright Flash and Angel Wings' Very depressing. But very good, and based on the real events of the bombing in Hiroshima. And Elric0Sis also another one: If you like the thought of Chibi Akatsuki, read 'Akatsuki R' Us'. And actually, if you're a KisaIta fan in general, go ahead and read any of her stories, she's a big fan.

If you like a wide variety of Anime, and are a SasuNaru fan, you can also read 'Who and Who' Although the author's name excapes me, go ahead and look.

If you love Akatsuki in general? There's always 'Akcracktsuki' or something along those lines. It has a chapter for every possible Akatsuki couple- it's not finished, there's around 100 possiblities. But the mere idea- it's something cool to read when you have nothing else to do~

Then there's a Naruto-Harry Potter Crossover, I think it's called 'True Identity' and once again- the authors name escapes me. But it has a serious, smart Naruto that has to protect Harry (like with most other Harry-Naruto crossovers) So far they've found out Orochimaru's trieing to team up with Lord Voldy, and Sakura, Shikamaru, Ino, Kiba, Hinata, and Neji have arrived as back-up guard duty. But they don't know Naruto's there, and as far as they know, he's dead. So there's a pile of drama. Just keep an open mind that there's KibIno XD. But it's also getting ready for NaruHina (I'm pretty sure)

I can't think of any more of my personal favorites, but here's just something I wanted to throw out there. Go ahead and read this chapter- the one, after the chapter, after this, is where the big drama starts-......... Okay, I'm done now. Go ahead and read.

----------------------The Truth

I woke up. Thankfully without a hangover, I seem to be immune to them. But either way, Yahiko's in my god damned doorway. "What the fuck do you want?" I said immdiantly upon waking up. Anger being my coffee.

"Your Mother was worried sick last night," He said with that damned authority-voice.

"What's your point?" I said, moving over to lean on my arm.

"My point is, me and Jiraiya had to help her get ready for work today while she was crieing waterfalls!" He yelled making me sit up for a second. "If you weren't being so selfish trying to uphold your damned popularity that no one even cares about maybe-" He ran out of things to say, "... maybe she wouldn't of been like that." He finished and I heard him run down the stairs and slam the screen door.

I pushed any thoughts away from my mind, ignoring the numbing feeling I got from biting lip so hard and I stomped down the stairs like he did. I landed on a seat in the kitchen across from Naruto who stirred his cereal almost shyly.

I sat there a couple minutes trying to ignore the world untill he spoke up. "Jiraiya went for grocerys." He explained, still not taking a bite at the soggy rainbow that used to be cereal. After a few more moments of silence he started again, "Why were you hanging out with Kagura Oni?"

"Why shouldn't I be?"

He looked up. "Well, it's just that she's mean to everybody, specially' Yiko'. And, well.... I guess.... Yeah," He mumbled. "She's made people cry before."

I looked at the clock, five minutes till the buses should arrive. So I grabbed my book bag perfectly placed in the living room. "The world's just like that."

I went out the door with the echo of Naruto yelling 'No it's not' and just continued my way down to the bus stop and towards Kagura's group.

When I finally got there she motioned. Akame and the boys looked hungover. "You 'mkay? get hit by the Beer Train too?"

I started with another piece of gossip that I'm sure wasn't entirely a lie. "I'm fine. Yahiko just wants to kill me."

Akame tried her best to start a bit of conversation on that. And when the buse came we all grabbed a seat in the back while they tried to talk off their headaches.

I was absent-mindedly listening to what else they had to say. I spotted Hidan, Kakuzu, Deidara and Sasori climb on the bus. Wasn't really surprised when Deidara pulled Sasori over to some seats right infront of me. But it was fifteen minutes untill Deidara turned around in his seat and poked at me. "Konan? hn,"

"What?" I said, can't really ignore him but at the same time can't find a reason to be angry with him.

Deidara actually seemed modest for a few seconds. "It's, um... hn, there's a loft near the school. When we get the pass we all do a little concert for the towns' kids. We were gonna' do one tomarrow night and... wanna come?"

"She has other plans." Kagura answered for me. I put my head down and started ignoring him again. But I could easily see him slump back into place and whine to Sasori. Sasori's not-so-quiet-response being 'She's just a bitch'.

--------------School-Lunch

I managed to droan through the day with half-listening and ignoring life once again. I'm sure Yahiko was expressing his hatred toward me in some way in every class but I don't care.

We made it to lunch and I let Kagura lead me to the table. And tried to get back into the game. "What plans do I have tomarrow?" I asked.

Kagura smiled looking pretty damn devilish. "It's not easy to get someone who deals in this town. But I have enough to keep the five of us _ultra_-busy all night tomarrow." She winked to the others. Or maybe it was just the one guy. I imagined a plan to get me and him in the same bed had gone down somehow. Hey, I was gonna lose it eventually. Might as well have the excuse of being high.

I made sure not to turn around and look at Yahiko's table. But Akame pulled our attention there. "Hey, the sluts back!" She yelled so most of the room could probably hear.

Coming through the Cafeteria doors, looked like a middle-schooler, about Naruto's age probably. She had a tight pink tank-top with her bra strap showing, although she doesn't seem like she _needs_ one yet, and a copper metalic mini-skirt. She also had bright red glasses and matching hair. One side looked long and straight but the other looked chopped and slept-on.

Kagura started up next, "Hey Karin! you get that abortion yet!?" She yelled over at her. "Principal might not see you anymore if you didn't."

A surprising number of kids in the room laughed. The girl looked up for a second but probably upon seeing who was talking ducked it down again. I watched her a while, she smiled at Yahiko's table- probably the only table that didn't have anyone laughing at her. And kept walking. Then the worst- a couple of tables she went to wouldn't let her sit down. Eventually she got to a table in the far corner. Naruto's friend Sakura and a couple other girls were sitting at it and Sakura gestured her down for a seat.

I turned back to what I was supposed to be calling _my_ table. All four of these people were laughing over the apparently hilarity they just started and how they managed to get half the school laughing with them. When Kagura looked back at me I smiled and pretended like I'd been laughing too.

-------------Later

Oi, my minds hay-wire today. I mean- even my 'friends' back in the city wern't really _that_ mean. Well, I think.

But the more I think the more I realize that I might have been the one calling the girl out before. But I shake that thought away and keep down the hall. But then I stop half-through a door. Mr. Yian's class,

I panicked, for some reason. I looked at Mr. Yian and tried something. "Um, I don't feel really good. Can I check in with the nurse first?"

He gave me a smile to kind for me to probably deserve. He nodded and kept down the hall towards the bathroom.

I got in and took a deep breath. The window was open and the room smelled a bit like nicotine. Who'd think city schools and country schools had so much in common?

I started running some water and stood infront of a mirror. Finally letting myself think. Okay, so I'm a bitch, I can deal with that. But being a cronie to a Queen-of-Devils bitch?

Why had I deserted Yahiko and the others? I leaned agenst sink squesing my eyes shut trying to clear my mind.

Why did Lolli abandon Dave?

Because we were scared. Scared that they might have to settle and be alittle less then always extravagant. To have no weaknesses and seem like we were perfect. But what would've happened if she put down the lighter and spoon. And managed in being extravagently normal?

But she didn't. She ran out of the hospital and away from Dave who she _knew_ loved her. Hell, she even killed a damn kitten. But that's not what Val did. Val risked her very life to save her love, she quit the Nevermore and went home. Managing to keep both fantasy and reality at the same time. But not being a complete bitch while doing it.

Could I do that? could I be like Val? Maybe, what'd helped her along the way?... Her love for an ogre, guilt from what she was doing to her friends, seeing what'd happened to the others, what else?... My mouth flinched alittle.

Luis drove her away, back home to return Ravuses heart and even save Dave. Maybe I can fall into Yahiko's fantasy world and not come out seeming like a pyscho. I turned the water off. I'll try and give Yahiko another shot, if he'll let me. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

My heart filled with hope, I almost started back for class. Untill I heard the crieing.

I opened the stall. Like I already knew who it was. Karin sat on the toilet seat weeping into her hands. And then I started wondering what Yahiko saw happening to my Mother.

She looked up for a second, I got down infront of her and whispered her down to me. She wasn't an ugly girl, she had pretty lips and clear eyes. And being flat didn't mean she had a bad figure. She had leggings under her skirt and her shirt had a Breast Cancer ribbon in the corner. They'd all just been being mean for no reason. She went to crying in my chest for the rest of the time with the stall door closed.

Maybe Karin is a whore. Maybe Sasori's a selfless bastard. Maybe Hidan's a satanist. Maybe Yahiko's a maschonist. Maybe Deidara's a fag and maybe Kisame's mutated. Maybe the group is just a big outcasted gang of troublemakers.

Or maybe there's the truth;

Maybe Yahiko's a natural leader. Maybe Deidara and Sasori are just clichely misunderstood artists. Maybe Hidan's a hilarious douchebag. Maybe Kisame's a wise older brother figure, and maybe Karin's just a bullied little girl that wants to be seen. Maybe the group is a safe-house to get away from the kids who _are_ the troublemakers.

Maybe everyone else in this town are just selfish gossips who are too stupid to even notice that just _maybe_ they're ruining someones life.

------------------After School

I ended up not returning to Kagura's group _or_ Yahiko's. I got on the bus first with Karin and tried to sit where no one'd see me.

I still had one arm around her while she calmed down. People were whispering- Newsflash, tonights bit of gossip: The New Girl is gay. But now, we have speedo padding with Junko.

I tried to get her attention, "Are you okay now?" She smiled timidly and nodded her head. Leaning back, there were still streaks down her cheeks. " What was everyone elses problem?"

She looked out the window, "Nothing I guess. Everyone knows who I like. They make fun cause I can get persistant." I started wondering how I must've been with Itachi. "They think I'm just like that to _everyone._"

Nodding more but half-listening cause I already understood. "Why hadn't you been in school?"

She grinned alittle and facepalmed. "My cousins were visiting town. The one's Schizophrenic, my dad pulled me out to keep an eye on him... I guess I should have expected the rumors that'd went around while I was gone."

Akame passed us with one of the guys but I gave them the 'keep fucking moving' look that I seem to be so good at.

---------Later

We sat in silence for those fifteen minutes and got off the bus. She had her pretty-in-pink sticker-covored and mascot-invaded backpack. I think she caught me staring, "I never really found the need for a new one." She tugged at a Hello Kitty sticker, "And they won't come off." I laughed alittle.

"Want me to follow you home?"

"If I give you permission I can't call the cops." She joked again. "I live just up the hill. This place is like a mini-country." She gestured around us "The Market Place and Strip." She commented, then pointed up the hill to where her and I know Kisame and Sasori lived. "Rich peoples turf." I took a closer look up the hill, all the houses looked updated like was a modern-day cabin might be like. Then she pointed down the alley to where Kakuzu'd gone. "Business-family vacationing homes and other summer-palaces." She pointed to the area that went to the left of Jiraiya's driveway and down, "Suburbs, where most of everyone lives." She gestured to that colorful little house on the prarie "And then there's Jiraiya's house."

I laughed alittle more. "Interesting,"

She nodded hiking up the backpack again. "I need to head back, but thanks."

I nodded back and she trotted up the hill. I looked around secretly hoping I could catch Yahiko's group. But it looks like I somehow managed to miss them completely. If they even got on the bus.

I spotted Kagura and Akame getting off the buses and whizzed through the tiny crowd towards Jiraiya's house.

Oh goddammit it's just _my_ house now.

I found myself on the porch without anyone calling my name. So, so far so good. I walked through and actually let the homey feel into my mind, acting like I'd lived here all my life.

Jiraiya was on the couch watching TV, he looked up at me and waved, half-smile on his face. He's probably mad at me too. Mom was in the kitchen cleaning things, I'm not quite sure of what her work time is but she's in casual clothes now. I walked over and stopped halfway into the kitchen.

She looked up with that impassive neutral face of hers. Makes her look in her early twenties this time. She almost twitched a smile on her face and crossed her arms leaning on the counter.

"Sorry Mom," I spoke. It sounded like when I was tweleve and wasn't paying attention, got mud all over the new carpet in our old city apartment. Back then she glared like a cat and scolded me. But this time she smiled and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"It's okay baby," She rubbed my back and I half-hugged with what I could while holding the heavy bookbag. After a loud '_awwwwww'_ from Jiraiya and a few extra moments she pulled out. "run upstairs and do your homework now."

Haha, homework. And now I've finally realized what I _haven't_ been doing the past couple days.

I gave the weak grin that said that and she shooed my up the stairs. But stopped halfway through my panicking outside Naruto's door. Yahiko _had_ managed to pass me getting off the bus, without even saying anything. He looked up from helping Naruto with _his_ homework (painfully ironic, huh?)

"Hey," Was all I managed, Naruto turned around and waved his hands in the air like that adorable little lunatic he is.

Yahiko nodded solemly, "Not hangin' out all night again?"

"No," I tried not to growl.

He watched me like I was a rat in the house a few more minutes- oh god, why the hell did I just say rat? While I was thinking that he blinked a few times and said- "The guys really want you to come to the concert," Naruto added an agreement to that.

I pondered a few moments, "Unlike you, right?"

He watched me alittle more. "I never said that." I fought the grin horribly and made my way for my room.

* * *

Weee~ Okay now, I've finally managed to post this (obviously since you're reading, right?)

I was gonna put up all the themes and crap. But- after finding it meaningless to do so. I've decided that if you care, you're reading this, and then that makes you very much capable of hitting that button under this and asking for me to review-reply it to you.

In fanfic news- I have a poll on my profile(which I've finally updated) asking which one of my stories you want me to update the most (Includes the stories I'm most likely to update if asked, and stories I haven't posted yet.)

So run on over to that if you hate me for not updating enough XD sorry. But in personal news- my Mom's starting the dreaded menopause.

I. Am. Doomed. She was emotional to begin with.

So anyway, Hope you liked- the chapter after this one is where the drama starts (which I have labled as 'season 2' of this story)

PS: I'm gonna start revising some of my older stories. Special thanks to- I think the screenname was DarkSacredJewelXoX. Who is a wonderful reviewer and pointed out all the flaws, plot holes and typos of my strangely popular oneshot 'Just You and Me My Love' Where as all other reviewers just said 'ZOMG gweat!'

Dis' ez' LoveGunnah' ovah' an' out fo' now! HOMEIEZ~~~!!!


	7. The Concert

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or any other things used in here. Be it song lyrics, or pop culture refferences. Naruto&Akatsuki are owned by Masashi Kishimoto. Songs are owned by Rascal Flatts, Britney Spears and Will Smith. And Pop Culture refferences are owned by Ryan Seacrest.

Okay~.............. I've now read Naruto Chapter 486.... I shall cry now.

I think I screamed at Sasuke for fifteen minutes in my head... Ya' know, the usual. 'fuck you you fucking selfish bastard' 'you're a fucking idiot you fucktard' 'I hate you, burn in Itachi's gaze you motherfucker.' 'fuckfuck, fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck'............. I swear, I'm not even a huge Hidan fan, XD I'm christian.

But yeah, also, expect more Valiant/Ironside/Tithe/The Good Neighbors refferences. I've decided to just plain make Konan a Holly Black fan.... Okay, I won't rant like in the other chapters. Writing now~

Oh, and, a comment on the country that wants to try and make it law that Gays must be sentanced to death..... That just friggin' urges me to make this a yaoi story. I mean- God made us in his image, white, black, asian, gay, straight, animated, furrie. We're all his children. His message is love, I don't think two guys or girls being in love is wrong at all, it's all love. Even since they adopt the millions of orphaned children in the world. if gay was really evil- it would be as rare as Demon possesions.

They call gay sexual terrorism? Hate towards fellow humans is fucking terrorism T.T .....Bakas-for-brains, all I got ta' say. You can read now~...... I just said I wouldn't rant and then I did..... XD I'm a Urasundochi~

Oh, and another Fanfic reccomendation... Ummm, I think the screename is-..... Okay, I don't remember what the screename was-(was it Order of Rawr? or was that a Lemony Snicket author?) Anyway, the story is called 'Days go By' It's an Akatsuki AU colleage story. Includes Fem!Dei (which doesn't come out as annoying as you would expect, actually quite enjoyable) And... well, it's just a great story. Includes PaiKon, KakuHid,(Hidan's hilarious, I'll end at that) KisaIta, (I think)ZetTob, And SasoFem!Dei. Yes, I know, those stories where all the Akatsuki partners are couples are annoying, I myself find them EXTREMELY annoying. But when it's well written and the love is hearfelt- it's alittle more then tolerable. ^_^

Anyway.... This Chapter is the SEASON FINALE of SOS: SAVE OUR SOULS!!!! ENJOY!!!~~~~

---------------------------------The Concert

I'd actually managed to finish my homework before 1AM. Ha, and I was tired enough to change into PJ's and fall asleep shortly after that. Cool, I pwn all.

The sun shined through my window at around 7:30 in the morning. Perfect timing. But I'd probably have slept in if I didn't have a little yellow runt sitting on my bed. "Morning Ko~" Naruto cooed,

"What do you want?" I moaned alittle. What day is it? Time has excaped me...

Thursday, I've been here three days. I've had about three revelations. Made about ten friends, four enemies. And I have a twelve-year-old sitting on my bed like he's my baby brother. Well, I guess he could be. But anyway. Naruto responded to my question. "It's time to wake up~"

"The bus doesn't get here untill another hour."

He smiled and laughed at himself again. Actually seeming shy now. "I was actually thinkin' I could help you unpack the rest of your room?"

I looked back at his annoying lovable face as his blue eyes practicly pleaded me and he rubbed the back of his head. I couldn't help but grin at that. "And I didn't even have to threaten you?" He brightened up and smiled bigger. Pulling me out of my bed immidiantely and hopping over to the boxes that were still mostly in the middle of the floor. "I'll work on stocking the dresser and you scatter the knic-knacks around."

That was surprisingly a blast. Naruto chattered on about whatever came to his mind. And I actually listened this time. After deciding how everything would go in the dresser, which I had moved to next to the door. I started on the items box. It wasn't mysterious on what we were doing. I yelled down the stairs to Jiraiya asking him if he had a white desk for me to put extra stuff on. I don't know where he got it or if he just pulled it out of his ass- but he brought up one that matched everything perfectly.

Yahiko contributed too. He got a big white vanity mirror from the garage that also perfectly fit on top of the desk, yay~ And Mom finally gave me a big blue rug that matched the walls.

Yahiko dissapered after that. But I carried on with Naruto. I put my MP3 player, some make-up and accesorys I might still need for special occations and school stuff on the desk. Through old plushies and photo-albums on top of the dresser. Lined the windowsill and end table with knic-knacks- My Mother gave me her collection of angel trinkets a long time ago. I'd finally decided to set them out.

I threw a box of unmentionables at Mom to hide in the bathroom. Gave Jiraiya some boxes to throw in the garage. By the time the room was finished Naruto was (almost) out of breath, and we were running late for the bus.

Giving Naruto a greatful kiss on the cheek before shoving him out of my room. I stripped off the blue tank-top and pajama-pants to replace them with the nearest things to my hands, a purple sweater-jacket over a orange tube-top and navy buisness-worthy short skirt.

I snatched up my back-pack and shoved last nights homework inside. Trampled down the stairs where Naruto waited by the door hopping around nervously. We bid quick goodbyes and raced down the hill. The one bus was already pulling out, and Sasuke hanging on the door was the only thing keeping the other from leaving without us.

Me and Naruto pummled onto the bus half apoligizing for the wait and half laughing our asses off that we actually made it.

-------------------School

I actually sat with Naruto and Sasuke on the bus ride, squeezing into the corner on the seats. Yahiko must've been on the other bus, but Hidan was with Kakuzu up front and he twisted himself around to wave, for some reason.

After getting to the school Sasuke and Naruto hopped away and I made a dash for my first class. Trying to get there before either posse ambushed me.

My first class was History with Miss Yuhi. I stepped up to the desk, being one of the first there. Miss. Yuhi was a young woman that looked almost too young and pretty to be a teacher. She had dark waving hair and elegant make-up. She had a cherry-blossom-styled Spring dress on that made her look all the younger. And she was seeming like a steriotype perfect-teacher. That the school board wants to fire but all the kids love. I handed her an assignment I didn't remember the due-date for. "Miss. Yuhi?"

She looked up with a neighbour-smile. "Yes Konan?"

Even without the mystical high, I was going to try and be as nice and polite as possible. "Um, I hadn't been paying attention in class and forgot the due date. I just finished my Greece paper and wondering if I could turn it in."

I set the paper in her hands and she scanned it. My penmenship was probably sloppy cause I'd been writting it fast. She gave it an approved look and set it with other papers on the desk. Litered with papers to grade, family pictures and an ironic apple. "It looks nice. I'll have it graded by the due date next Thursday." She giggled alittle, cause I must've looked like one of those Anime characters when they sweat-dropped. I gave a weak smile to her reassuring one as she thanked me. I went back to my seat. I'd been so close to not even hearing the whispers.

"See that? new girls a nerd!"

------------------Later

Well, my nickname'd been 'Skin-kneed-K' at my old school. So nerd is... better?

Yahiko barely acknowladged me during class. I bet I didn't look to good constantly flickering my sight up to the back of his head either. I had some hope though- I don't think he was staring at _himself_ when he was twirling that mirror on his desk.

I payed more attention around me during class. I have Shop with Deidara, Kisame and Kakuzu. After I walked in Deidara scribbled 'HI KONAN!' in big letters on his binder. Shop was ironicly boring. Teacher Mr. Sarutobi kept dosing off while teaching on how to use a torch. On odd-number days we have Gym with some crazy loud green thing for a teacher. With a Moe Howard hairdon't.

I had Art class with- again Deidara, and Sasori. I did a playful 'L-on-the-forehead' to Sasori which totally cracked Deidara up. Our Teacher here is just some poetic wack-job. Reminds me of Micheal Jackson. Orbi-Chakoo whatever. He makes us paint animals.... Alot,

Then it's lunch, but as I stand in the line trying to desipher which table to go to. I pick up my tray and turn around. Kagura had a death-glare on me that says 'come here or I have my Daddy's men kill you.' I hurry on over to a diffrent table. She's in the way of Yahiko's. But I catch Karin and Sakura lets us both seek refuge at her table with a giggling blond. Withdrawn brunette that was nibbling pastries and another panda-ear girl that was preaching feminisim to us all. Lunch went by fast and Sakura chatted with me agreeing on Kagura's bitchyness.

The crowd still kept me away from Yahiko's group, and I didn't have guts to go up to just one of them to follow around, god I'm pathetic. Literature has the weird bitch Miss. Same. On odd-number days we have Science with Mr. Hatake instead. Whom I think has a cold, he wears a medical mask the whole time. Makes me wonder what-the-fuck his face looks like.

Then it's annoying Math with Iruka Umino, whose way too nice to be a teacher. Nuff' said.

And finally homeroom. I can't escape here. I head for my desk untill I'm grabbed from behind. I stop cold-

__

- I turn around finally and of course it's Akame. Why should my target come to me? No, that'd be too perfect.

"Konan what's with you? Kagura's pissed," Her pink-nailed hands felt aliitle like vile on my shoulder.

"I just, didn't really... Take a liking to hanging out with you guys."

She blinks a few times. "....What?... Why not?"

I blink myself, so she really is a dumb blond. "Well, all you guys do is gossip about rumors and get into trouble. It was-..." I look for a word that would be in her volcabulary. "...corny,"

She blinks some more, then pulls back like I just insulted her dress. "Corny? are you kidding me?" She shakes her head, like she's a over-done actor who just figured something out. "you're screwing around with the maschonist aren't you!" She screeches annoyingly loud. People turn their heads and start laughing alittle. They all know who 'maschonist' is.

"W-what?" The kids are enjoying the show and Mr. Yian isn't here yet. I'm doomed.

"That's it isn't it!?" She screams pointing that glittery pink nail at me. "He's fucking you so you're gonna run on over to him now! Don't you remember what we've been saying?! He's a freak! they're all freaks!"

Looming hands grab her shaking shoulders. One being black and the other white. "Are we done Miss. Mona?" She screams and pulls back, not looking Mr. Yian in the face and running away.

"I can't believe you Konan! you're one of them now too!" She screamed again, overly dramatic. I started thinking she was making a scene on purpose. "You fucking whore!"

I felt warm arms wrap around my neck and then golden locks drape infront of me. "Aka, darling. Haven't you heard the news? Konan's a nerd, and nerds are always virgins!" Was what I heard from Deidara's very relaxing voice. I took a sigh turning back to Akame's-... well, I'm not sure there's a name for her expression. Just more over-drama...

Hidan started snorting histarical laughter. Then Kisame finished. "And they live longest in horror movies. Unlike the skanky up-stuck blonds."

"I think he's talking about you Deidara," Sasori whispered. That cocky smile on his face again, Deidara takes an arm off of me to hold up a fist.

"Detention, Miss. Mona," Mr. Yian finished finally. Akame's awe-struck face as she stumbles out is probably as hilarious as Hidan's laugh makes it out to be.

Deidara'd moved attention to aruging with Sasori for ruining the moment. Yahiko took my shoulder and led me away from the packed-in commotion and to our seats. I turned my head back to the door again, "Want me to walk you there?" Itachi asked Akame with genuine pity. The sweet kind.

She batted his hand away. "Don't touch me freak," She growled before stomping off in a huff down the hall. I have no idea what started these misfit-freak rumors. Maybe just frustration that Yahiko and everyone else wern't interested in gossip, so they ended up becoming it. All I know is that in the city, any girl would jump at the chance of a guy like Itachi even talking to them. But here, it seemed that him hanging out with the 'freaks' made him polluted somehow.

Yahiko set me down like a doll in my seat. He turned back as Mr. Yian instructed for everyone to return to their seats and (mainly to Hidan)to stop snickering. Everyone did so. Kisame leaned down next to me to ask if I was alright and I replied. Itachi found his seat fingering the others as a balance-guide. Kakuzu had a tired look while Hidan got my attention- gestured to where Akame'd been, and then made yapping noises before chuckling at the scene again. Finally, after giving Sasori a final death-glare Deidara gave me thumbs up.

I grabbed a compact I'd snuck into my desk. I put it up. It reflected off Yahiko's and he chuckled. Putting his down he turned his attention to the Teacher... Alright, maybe I have more hope then I thought.

----------After School

"And then she just had a complete WHAT-THE-FUCK face and-and-and-" Hidan seemed to enjoy repeating the scene over and over with amazing detail. But I found the 'kill-me-now' look on Kakuzu's face ten times more hilarious.

Deidara chuckled back at Hidan who continued rambling. "Ko-Ko~ I thought we'd lost you~" He said squeezing me. Sasori muttered something I didn't catch that turned all of Deidara's attention on him once again.

I was walking in-beat with Kisame and Itachi once again. Itachi gave me a charming stop-her-in-her-tracks smile. "Welcome back." And for a second I felt alittle like puddy.

Yahiko was on my other side by now. I imagined a fangirl-esque jealousy that probably wasn't even there. "The Darkside may have cookies. But we have cake."

"AND PIE! lotsa' lotsa' PIE!" Hidan screamed from somewhere behind.

I kind of started slowing and falling back alittle. After Itachi turned back from checking on me. I giggle to myself- I have a personal harem.

And they're _alllllll_ mine~

-------------Later

We rode the bus home. I sat down in a seat but Yahiko didn't join me. I peeked around the corner to see where he was, maybe he really was still mad at me? Really can't blame him.

The spare seat next to me ended up being stolen by Naruto and Sasuke again. Sasuke scrunched up close to me and we whispered loudly about Naruto's beligerence while he whined and asked what 'beligerent' ment.

I got off with them. Naruto announced that him and Sasuke were going to go mess around in the woods and other crap. I waved them off and started for Jiraiya's.

No one ran up behind me like was expected. I hurried up the steps and threw my bag in my room. Jiraiya's door was open and I nosed myself inside. "Jirry, wazzup?"

He turned around from his computer- we have a computer?!- and smiled. "Nutin' comon in homie." He gestured me in and I got down next to him.

I watched him type shit on the screen awhile. I wasn't too interested in what it was. But I stifled some laughs when I caught the words 'clit' 'thrust' 'moan' and 'dominate'

"Yiko's doin' a concert tonight." I tried, speaking in his language.

"Cool," He typed more.

".... I have no idea where it's gonna be at...."

".... In town..... he invaded the old run-down building at the end of the road there, near the schools, and they use it for that concert shit....." I nodded and left the room. I then heard him scream 'Eureka!' and the typing sound reached down the hall.

I hopped down the steps. I must not have heard but it looks like Yahiko dropped off his bag. I looked out the door. Damn bastards hiding from me or somethin'. I went out and looked around some more. I could almost guarantee that was Naruto and Sasuke climbing up ladders onto the top of buildings.

The sun was on it's way down. The sky was they same gray color as Yahiko's eyes. I started on the way down the steep hill. This little village was starting to feel more homey and lived-in. And it wasn't too hard to imagine it was where I was living now. If I can offically make peace with Yahiko and the others then maybe everything can come out right- if not just decent. Running away with them was starting to sound more fulfilling and less impossible.

Trotting up to building, looked abandoned. I peered up and there was a yellow tuff of hair and raven top. I called up and Naruto looked over the edge down at me and smiled his smile. "Konan! wassup?!"

"Yahiko's doing that concert right?" I yelled up there.

Naruto leaned on the edge, Sasuke got down beside him either to see me or to grab him if he fell. "Yup, I guess so."

"They just left with Hidan's mom." Sasuke informed. "Did they desert you? Itachi said you were tottering off Yahiko's good side."

"I guess so." But, I'm a bitch as most would know. So I'm not gonna let the hints get to me. "Do you know if I can get a ride?" I continued cranking my head up to them. Faint rapping was in the background. Probably had a radio or somethin' but I've never heard the sorrow tune before.

Naruto and Sasuke both pointed to the bar next door. I looked over at it. "See if someone's heading that direction."

"We swear only a quarter of pedophiles dwell within." Naruto chuckled, Sasuke whacked him in the back and they both chuckled away out of my sight. The song changed to the same rapper and I could've sworn it was chanting 'Sakura-Chan'

Humming the catchy tune along with me I had my fingers entertwined behind my back and walked onto the porch and to the door. Smokey the dog peered up at me before rubbing his face like he was being bashful. I walked inside the dimly-lighted place and searched around for a friendly face. I wandered over to the bar. Sitting a stool away from a guy in a un-done buisness suit and black hair draped around covoring his face and the drink infront of him.

The bartender spotted me. He was the one Yahiko's gang had been talking to the other day. the one Kagura said was on crack with a record. Actually, he just looked aged. Barely-visable wrinkles on his face, he had a weird eye color. In this light I could've sworn it was red. He had black hair that was alittle frizzed from not brushing it, went to alittle passed his shoulders. And he was big too, not crack, steroids maybe. He gave me the look that said he regonized me. "Bluette Yahiko's pissed at. You wanna sneak more vodka for your friends?"

His bluntness was almost comical, but he had that calming rough voice I liked. "I'm not with Kagura anymore. Just a one-night stand." He chuckled, leaning over onto the bar to wait for me to talk more. "I actually need a ride to the place Yahiko's... performing at tonight."

He nodded, then turned around. "Anko! got a minute?" A bartender that was on the other side of the liqour racks turned around. She had dark hair pulled back, black shirt and a orange mini-skirt. She was the loud one that(as I've now figured out) didn't want to give the vodka to the old guy that gave it to us.

She had a bit of a pout on her face. "This place is packed, you really think I'll leave for ten minutes to come back and you nag me?" She called half-glaring at him.

He rolled his eyes and started nudging the guy next to me. "Orchi? you awake for a ride?"

The guy groaned and put his head up. "I'm awake you filthy commoner." He slurred, I regonized him. He was my Art teacher. Once again- mister Orbi-chucky-whatever. He had the same personality sober and teaching as drunk and doing nothing. "Wether I can legally drive anywhere, is another story all together." He gestured around like drunks do before taking a deep swig out of the bottle. And I think he purposely burped afterward for effect.

Mister Bartender rolled his eyes yet again. There's something freaky about them. He has contacts or something.

"Milady need a ride?" I looked over to the doorway to the other side.

"Mr. Yian?" I almost gasped out. He had his dress shirt unbuttoned with a tank-top under it. He had one of those incognito hats pulled down his face, and the poll tables stick in his hand.

"I'm heading back that way Konan. I'll take you." He handed the stick over to one of the husky women he'd been playing with who teasingly whined about his leaving.

"Watch her, she's a troublemaker." The bartender said turning back to pour drinks that I hadn't heard be ordered.

"I've noticed." He put money on the counter and walked over to my drunk Art teacher who seemed to be singing Michael Jackson songs. "Orochimaru, get home to your kids." He moaned an okay and Mr. Yian put more money on the bar next to him. Before leading me out.

Naruto and Sasuke were on the ground trying to coax Smokey into play. And a old guy with a bloated belly was sitting on a bench some feet away cursing and yelling South-Park level babble, and something about communists. I waved to Naruto who cheered for my ride and then I was inside Mr. Yian's car. A green Hybrid that looks like it's been trashed around alot.

The inside smelled like a rainforest. I looked around for a scented car freshner but didn't see one. Maybe a crown of willow branches and wilted flowers around the mirror were to blame. It kind of reminded me of the crown on the Ironside bookcovor.

I leaned my head against the window while he started the car and pulled out... Gawd I read too much.

After a while he nudged me, couldn't of been too long cause we wern't there yet. But I had that feeling where you open you're eyes and can't tell if you dozed off or not. "Are you alright after today?"

I nodded and smiled, trying to make sure I didn't look depressed to him. "Just tired, I'm half-ready to turn somersaults to get Yahiko to stop hating me."

"He didn't look quite like he'd hate you when all you guys left class together."

I smirked, "I think he's just a gentlemen. The kind who can sense a Princess in danger from a mile away." I chuckled alittle, feeling delirious. Yahiko's nickname for me made it ten times more hilarious.

I looked over in time to see him roll his eyes and nod agreeingly. I was bored, and actually pretty tired. I arched myself to crack my back and then set my head against the window again. "There's a story about a man who fell in love with a doctors daughter. She obviously loved him but she would never come close to him. He soon figured out she'd been raised norished by poison, and that she was slowly turning him into a poisonous person too." He said, like he'd read the story a thousand times. "But he wanted to help her, he brought her a antidote for the poison that helped him. She smiled and took it, not even bothering to tell him she knew it'd kill her. She fell into his arms and turned into flowers while her father cackled at the sucessful experiment."

I looked over at him curiously, "Why tell me this?"

"It's a story about loving something you probably shouldn't. He loved her although she could kill him, and she loved him because it made her feel free. I thought it related to you're situation. I'm not blind to how you've been acting all this time milady." His medieval way of addressing me was interesting. And I guess the story was... relatful, if that's a word. But I couldn't regonize it, but I guess kids nowadays have never heard of a fairytale unless Disney's adapted it.

Daydreaming, I shook my head when I realized the car stopped. We'd gotten there, I looked up at Mr. Yian who nodded. "T-thanks," I tryed to spit out so that I didn't look stupid.

He smiled very politely. "Yahiko'd forgiven you, don't try so hard." I smiled back and got out of the car. He pulled it down a side road I hadn't noticed that led to behind the schools.

I looked up. There was a makeshift sign on the wall that was obviously designed by Yahiko's personal artists. The sun was down but a streetlight lit it up for me. 'Akatsuki Band playing TONIGHT! don't miss or face the son of Jaws!'

I giggled. I couldn't help it. There was already a healthy amount of people here. I looked up. Above me was a shark plushie on a sting.

I took a step back to look up. Kisame helf the pole it was connected to. "Get your pink ass in there!" He grumbled smilingly with the 50's buisness tone again. I looked at the door. A half-open steel door on a giant brick building that had lights flashing inside. Too tempting.

Smiling at Zetsu Yian's story, embracing a new choice. And trying despretely to ignore the thoughts that a Kelpie was about to lead me into the sea. I walked inside trying to choke down laughter.

Kids were hopping around in excitment that the show was starting. I couldn't tell much of what was inside, except that there were tables on either side. I giant dancefloor in the middle. At the far was was a giant stage, like at a broadway show. I spotted people fixing the red curtains. Above the stage was a steel bridge Sasori was standing on. He was holding a fat remote that was controling the lights. Eventually I lost sight of him when the curtains were fixed to hide the backstage and his little observation bridge.

Instruments were comically pushed into place by Kakuzu, the place wasn't made for the curtain so they couldn't hide the set-up. But it was still like 'almost-ready-almost-ready'

After a few minutes of lingering in the back near the door. Everything looked set up. And I saw members start to come on stage. Yahiko was there in the middle. He looked at the crowd but I couldn't tell if he saw me. Then he grabbed the mic- oh gawd- I've heard the song enough damn times to tell what it was. I almost wanted to close my eyes and wake up from this dream...

_I drive the road that you travel on_

_It's one day here and the next day gone_

_sometimes you bend, sometimes you stand_

_sometimes you turn your back to the wind_

_There's a world outside every darkened door_

_where the blues won't haunt you anymore_

_Where the brave are free and lovers soar_

_come ride with me to the distaint shore_

_We won't hesitate. To break down the garden gate_

_there's not much time left today~_

My mouth dropped open alittle bit. He sounded..... Nice... Deidara was jumping around on bass and Itachi had guitar. Kisame was pounding drums in the background. I walked through the small but cramped crowd to the middle of it.

_Life is a highway,_

_And I wanna ride it all night long_

_If you're goin' my way_

_Well I wanna drive it all night long_

_Through all these cities and all these towns_

_it's in my blood and it's all around_

_I love you now like I loved you then_

_This is the road and these are the hands-_

Hidan ran through the stage screaming that drowned out the music. Kakuzu went after him and everyone in the audiance laughed, I did too.

_-You knock me down and back up again_

_You're in my blood I'm not a lonely man_

_There's no road I can hold_

_The roads are free and this I know_

_I'll be there when the light comes in_

_Just tell them we're Survivors~_

He actually looked like he was having fun up there. Not the Yahiko that'd been grumpy avoiding me all day or the one that held me in place. I still chose against making more Valiant and Ironside hints and just enjoyed the music.

_Life is a highway,_

_And I wanna ride it all night long_

_If you're goin' my way_

_I wanna drive it all night long (All night long)_

_Life is a highway,_

_And I wanna ride it all night long_

_If you're goin' my way (goin' my way)_

_I wanna drive it all night long (All night long)_

Oh God, he's pointing. It's at me, please no one notice- yeah they're noticing... So why don't I care as much?

_There was a distance between you and I (Between you and I)_

_A misunderstanding once, but now. We look it in the eye~_

Itachi throws his guitar over to Deidara and he trades with his bass. Deidara does the solo from atop one of the speakers and Kisame tries to keep the beat on the drums while laughing.

_There ain't no note that I can't hold,_

_The roads are run and this I know_

_I'll be there when the light comes in_

_Tell them we're SURVIVING~_

Dei, Itachi and Kisame put their stuff down to coax everyone to clap with them. On the side of the stage Hidan and Kakuzu were singing along also. The lights that flashed signaled Sasori's participation and I had to sing along too. Despite thinking I didn't know the words.

_Life is a Highway_

_I wanna ride it all night long (all night long)_

_If you're going my way, I wanna drive it all night long_

_Life is a Highway (life is a highway)_

_I wanna ride it all night long_

_If you're going my way, (You're goin' my way)_

_I wanna drive it all night long (all night long)_

_Life is a Highway_

_I wanna ride it all night long _

_If you're going my way, _

_I wanna drive it all night long (all night long)_

The song ended with the flash of the lights that made me think they'd blow a fuse eventually. I laughed as Deidara hopped around the stage like a lunatic and Kisame tryed to duck out of the way.

The lights died down while they got ready for the next song. Yahiko jumped off the side of the stage and I couldn't help pushing myself over to him.

Without a word, after I'd gotten close enough he pulled me over to a table a couple feet away. Still sweating from the lights and panting from the singing. "Didn't think you'd really make it."

"Neither did I, not sure how you thought I'd get here after ditching me at home."

He chuckled, "Did you say 'home'?"

"Keep talking."

He rolled his eyes, still smiling. I looked back at the stage, Deidara was performing Britney Spears' 'Toxic' that wasn't seeming as gay as you'd first think. Yahiko kept talking, "Now, how do you like it here?"

"I hate it, but that's not the point." He nodded, knowing exactly what I ment.

"You wanna devote yourself? Dei, Hid, and Kisame said they'd start crying if you didn't."

I looked at him, trying to ignore the fact that music was blasting, people were screaming and Sasori was trying to make someone have a seizure. "I'm not sure I have a choice. But if I do, you need ta' be honest and tell me where the Nevermore that's making me love you guys is."

He laughed again, all riled up. "Only if you shut up and listen to my rat stories."

I smiled like the sneaky bitch I am. "You know Luis is gay right?" And at that his face got into a fight with itself of whether it wanted to turn pale or flush up. "Right?"

"Yes, but that's not the point." I started laughing. "It's the _character._ Lolli," I kept laughing louder. "sexual prefference has nothing to do with personality. You're being racist." He started chuckling the words while I was about to fall out of my seat.

He kept me in my seat while the rest of the music played out. We looked over at the stage, Deidara'd managed to change his clothes within about five seconds of being unseen. "How'd he do that?"

"I think he went to a Boy-Band Prep School." I chuckled some more. The song was ending. "Deidara needs to _do_ everything,_ be good_ at everything, _be seen being good_ at everything. Or he'll pout and cry like a little baby."

Now Hidan ran on stage, it was his turn. He'd started singing(scarily goodly) Will Smith's 'Switch'. Which was ironic seeing as it's the only brand of rap without swearing in it. Which seems to be Hidan's favorite passtime.

"What the fuck is Sasori doing backstage?" I asked, no lone, short, grumpy human could make lights dance like that.

"Nobody knows~" He called, "Only Deidara is stupid enough to disturb him during the button-pressing, which was followed by him turning the lights _off_ while Deidara tryed to sing Mandy Moore." I laughed, yet again.

I through my hair back, feeling alittle proud that I was making it. Being better. "Now what am I supposed to do?"

He smiled, still watching the stage. "Keep being like this."

I watched the rest of the show with him right there. Eventually Hidan tryed to drag Kakuzu into the performance, which was hilarious. Kakuzu's eyes got wide and tryed to step out of one of Sasori's spot lights that followed him around like he was escaping from jail.

We chatted alittle more about the ridculousness of my new friends. After Hidan, Sasori came on stage himself, setting the lights red and just perfect for him. He sang a really long love song I didn't regonize that was making the ladies swoon and guys jealous. I swear Deidara was pouting behind the curtain. He seemed to be serenading every girl in the audiance.

Yahiko wanted me to sing the encore. But I ducked under the table. He got up behind the curtain and told them something. I looked out from under the table and Itachi was singing- now that was sexy. But at the same time funny seeing as how it was Michael Jackson. With the whole 'You've been hit by-you've been struck by-a Smooth Criminal.' He shot a finger-gun at me. Damn I think I just had an orgasm.

Yahiko pulled me backstage. I tryed invain to protest. Since the easiest way up was for him to pull me on stage. And however I'd know they were fake- I didn't want to hear the new rumors on Monday.

But he got me back there and practicly threw me on the couch. "And she has been captured. What now cadets?"

"Skin her flesh and nibble at her insides!" Was from Deidara,

"Probe, the, bitch~" Hidan spoke like a robot.

"MAKE HER SING!!!!" Kisame screamed right near my ear. It rung and I leaned against the chair next to me. Which Sasori just _had_ to be in.

"You'd make a pretty doll." He said, hands holding his face and staring at me.

"Oh I would would I?" He'd said I was a piece of shit three days ago.

"Hm-mmm." His finger came up to trace my face. And his motha-friggin honey eyes made me want to sqee and glomp him. My mind went back to the song he'd been singing. "Pale clear-eyed face, with painted red lips on a mouth that can't open." I started laughing and fell back on Kisame, who'd stolen a seat next to me.

Itachi saved me from Sasori's tounge and set himself between me and his chair. He panted alittle and sighed from just finishing his performance. "Are you alright Konan?" He asked once he got a breath.

"Are _you _alright?" He chuckled seductively but didn't answer that.

"Konan~" Yahiko cooed getting back down infront of me. "We could always do another encore,"

"No!" I screeched, hiking up my legs to my chest. Everyone laughed at me. Except Kakuzu who was trying to get Hidan to pay attention to their argument. I started laughing too after a few minutes. I shook my head out of the daze, but then I let it right back in.

I helped the guys put things away. They keep all the gear in the back rooms for when they do this crap. The guys made sex jokes despite all of them being virgins, and I couldn't stop laughing the whole time.

"So you guys are the 'Akatsuki'?" I asked Yahiko once there was two seconds of silence.

Yahiko chuckled. "We are... Akatsuki, the Dawn of a New Age!" He announced dramaticly.

"Of retards!" Hidan boasted from behind a speaker. Yahiko threw something at him.

I went to seek refuge with Itachi and Kisame. I clutched Kisame's arm like I was scared I'd get pulled into the commotion, Itachi laughed, and I think Kisame turned.... Purple?

There was a knock on the back door. Sasori opened it and welcomed inside Mr. Yian. "You children need a ride? Bri said she'd trade her Van for the night."

"Pwetty pwease wit' sugers on top!" Deidara cooed from his spot lounging on the saved-from-the-curb sofa.

"Isn't the Van her sisters?"

He took a few minutes to conjure up a reply. "Well, do you want to find out so you can walk? Cause' the news said there was a serial killer on the loose."

Deidara did a loud gasp before fainting back on the sofa. He rolled himself off when Hidan's laugh got too loud that he had to join. Yahiko grabbed my wrist. "Well, Princess? Walk or ride?"

I took a few seconds to pretend to decide. Yahiko chuckled again before pulling me out the door. Deidara whined that we were abandoning him in his time of emotional comfort before Sasori pulled a punch that came two inches from his face to get him to shut up. Which he didn't. Hidan was back into his argument with Kakuzu that I'm not sure what was about. If it was about anything. And Itachi was chit-chatting with Kisame, hard to believe they never talk about gossip.

Looking up as the others were deciding on seating arrangments. I saw Kagura's posse a few blocks down, they were laughing too, but the so-not-cigerette smoke hussled around the was what was causing it.

Yahiko'd already saw them. I clutched his jacket sleeve and kept my head down. He put me up in front so I'd be out of sight from them. He got in back to do damage control with the loud yelling and whining in the back. Kisame was wacking Hidan with his wooden sword to get him to stop whining. And Hidan was yelling something about the gods eating them all. Sasori had his ears plugged comically leaning against the window- but that just made Deidara want to talk louder.

There wasn't really meaning to any of the inexplicable joy everyone was having annoying eachother. But at least it was really real. Although I'm still have convinced that at least one of them is a sparkly vampire, or a changling. I could see Itachi being a changling. Maybe next heir to the Seelie throne or whatnot.

Zetsu was chuckling himself while he turned on the car. Kagura looked over at the car but didn't seem to notice me.

The drive was loud. I didn't participate in the chaos but I watched with a smile on my face. When we were almost there I saw Yahiko's pained face of having no control what-so-ever right now. I laughed, he stuck his tongue ring out at me.

Zetsu parked in the middle of the street once we got there. He then told us all to get the hell out, he grabbed me before I was out and kissed my hand. "Good luck," He smiled all polite prince-charmingly, I got out and curtsied. He chuckled again and drove off.

Kakuzu grumpily waved us off. He started off towards his house but then Hidan pulled him the other way. Urging a... _sleepover?_

Sasori was gone before I noticed I looked around, no where. Deidara looked like he migjht break down crying. Before comically slumping and wadding off in Hidan's direction.

Sasuke and Naruto were back again. Naruto tackled and hugged me raelly tight chattering about something. Sasuke stole Itachi away and they left like the had before. Itachi waved and bid goodbyes, Kisame picked me up and wagged me around in the air hugging me after Naruto let go. "Bye bye," He smacked a kiss on my cheek, I was surprised- I imagined he'd be more slimy.

Me, Naruto and Yahiko found our way up to the porch. Jiraiya and Mom welcomed us loudly. It looked like Mom just beat him in chess or something.

Mom came over and hugged me from behind like she does. "Need anything to eat honey?"

Jiraiya rumbled into the Kitchen, I followed after without anwsering Mom, he was making fish. "You will eat, or else you will be eaten." Jiraiya called like a zombie. With the utensil in one hand, he robot-walked over to me making chomping noises. I screeched and ran behind Yahiko, everyone was still laughing.

Mom grabbed my shoulders, "Eat, honey. He's serious," She said, Naruto practicely jumped onto a chair and started gobbling down what was on the first plate he reached. Loudly,

Yahiko pushed me down into a chair before Mom could. I blinked and everyone was seated before my eyes opened. Jiraiya put his hands up. "Rub-a-dub-dub, thanks for the grub. Yay God. And since Naru didn't wait, you can go ahead and damn him to Hell. Luv ya' J.C!"

Naruto made another one of those bird-screech sounds with his mouth full. He got down on the floor and started mumbling prayers with half a fish in his mouth. I almost fell out of my chair- again.

I probably inhaled the fish as fast as Naruto. Dinner conversation insisted souly of laughing at Naruto's antics. I almost couldn't get the food down without spitting it up again. I think the runts' doing it on purpose.

Sometimes it didn't feel anything less then fantasy. But then there were the parts were too real. Am I really as happy as Mom said I would be?

When my plate was clean I got pulled away from the table by my knight-in-shining-piercings Yahiko. I was upstairs before Naruto could whine and Jiraiya could make a puberty joke.

He dropped me off at my door. "Do I get a tip?" He asked holding his hand out. I lifted my hand, I ripped off all the glittery blue fake nails I had on since I was nine. And I put them in his hand. He looked down at them with the what-just-happened face. "....Deidara could make a shirt out of these."

"I'm sure he could. Make sure he gets them." He chuckled, fingering through them, watching the light reflect off. "Night,"

"G'night," He said, looking up with the smiling gray eyes. There goes the butterflys in my stomach again.

I entered my done-up room. Everything went by so fast, even my room now looks like I've been here all my life. Maybe if I stick with Yahiko's group- Akatsuki, then this place won't always seem like a complete hell.

We'll just wait and see won't we?

* * *

And there goes Season 1 of SOS: Save our Souls.

Weee~ Okay, NOW drama cna start! YAY MEH!

Wait- no! first, I'll put up the follow-em-home-chapter! Where we get to see all the Akatsuki's home life!

La-di-da. We went to my Granpa's funeral- well, my Moms-boyfriends-Dads. So- like Smokey, Rusty got a insert for this chapter (AKA: The cursing guy with the bloated belly Konan saw outside the bar.)

Ho-hum, anyway. Goin' to my Granma's tomarrow, well, today. Since that's when I'm gonna get to post this, (and actually do something to my Deviantart club! HAHA!)

It took a while to write this, so there's quite a few refferences. Besides the dead people in my life-Rusty and Smokey the dog. There's many other refferences.

The Rap Music Naruto and Sasuke were listening to was Eddie Rath's CD. AKA: Best Friend By My Side & then Sakura-Chan. I have that one stuck in my head XD

Konan made many refferences to the 'Modern Faery Tales' books by Holly Black, go pick them up. They're Tithe, Valiant and Ironside.

I wasn't orginally gonna add the scene, but I did. The song Sasori was singing was supposed to be a song his Japanese Voice actor sings. I don't remember the name though, just go to Youtube and type in something like 'Sasoris seiyuu singing' or something like that.

I'm trying to give Zetsu screen time guys. I had him develope a medieval way of speaking, and then tell the one story, it's called 'Rappaccini's Daughter' to those who have only seen the fairy tales adapted by Disney. Yes, I'm looking at you, every child in America.

So- since I love doing this so much- in commercialization and Copyright to Eddie Rath:

_Itachi~~~_

_Mangekyu in teh eyez_

_only see BLOOD when a ninja cryz_

_wanna kill me?_

_then you better get_

_SASUKE!!!_

Come back next chapter!


	8. Family Portraits

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, or anything else used in this story.

***REALLY LONG AUTHORS NOTE, SKIP IF YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME***

Okay, originally this authors note was going on and on with me ranting about the Akatsuki's ressurection in the regular series... But, that was about- dare I say a month ago?

When did I last update this? sorry everybody. The story wasn't supposed to go on a suspense-hiatus like this. I just- well, I guess I must've lost interest...

But I'm here now- I picked the chapter back up when it was less then half done. (It all went blank shortly after we get to Hidan's house. So everything before that was written a month before the rest.)

The current date that I am writing this new authors note is- Wednesday, May 19, 2010.**

So whenever this is posted on. That's how long it took me to write the rest.

I'm not at all leaving this story. Lets see- what's happened with me? Nothing, really. I got a new Tony Hawk game that I've been playing the last four days. (I haven't even touched the computer in a week, wow. That'a a record for me...)

Last night I suddenly got really bad chills. I couldn't stop shaking uncontrolably. My teeth chattering. I had a long-sleave on. I had to put a jacket on and got an extra blanket. I was still shivering and chattering. I'd have to say I got to bed around-... 7am... I woke up at 9, went back to sleep and woke up at 3pm. In which I was then rather toasty and sweaty... Maybe there was a ghost in my room... All I know is that right now, as I'm writting. My body aches horribally. I almost couldn't stand up on my own without groaning. And my body feels hot, like I have a sunburn or somethin'

But really everyone. Whoevers reading this has likely read my other authors notes. And know that Naruto, and many other Anime, are my life. Let me show you this example. When I told my mother I wasn't going to marry, I was just going to spend my life playing with Naruto characters and other cartoons from other demensions. She thought I was joking. But I was in a certain mood so I decided I wanted to convinse her that was what was going to happen. But the thing is- I started laughing during it, just because of the way she was reacting. So I sounded very much crazy. And upon realizing that- I started laughing harder.

My Mommy tried to playfully say- "Who are you?"

That was too much, I answered "I'm LoveGunner!" Just because it fit so perfectly. I was trying to stop laughing when I said it. So- it came out sounding weird and sadistic... which made me laugh more. At this point my Mom seemed genuinely worried. And called my Grandmother, to certify that I was insane.

But that's the thing! The Naruto characters really DO exsist! they really are in another demension somewhere. And if you believe enough you can go see them. Then, you have to try and remember what you did with them. It works as- usually the first thing you think of- isn't you coming up with something. It's you remembering.

As Itachi said: "We go through life thinking it's reality, when in actuality, reality would only be what the borders are of our own knowladge and senses. And so- one persons fiction could very well be another reality. And visa-versa."

We all know Itachi was a genius. And not only that- but I found a science artical that was saying the same exact thing! So- therefore. If something is thought up- then it's real in another sort of demension! VOILA! I'm not crazy! everybody else is!

And so I have recently came up with a sort-of prank to pull on my Mother. When I get a job and aren't home alot(she wants me to go to Art collage. Which might happen too.). I'll eventually tell her that I met a guy.

His name is Neil Cersack. He's 26 years old, likes Soccer and has two antique swords his father gave him. He has a little brother named Thomas. And has a ex-girlfriend named Eileen who doesn't like me. He has a friend named Elliot whose a party animal and invites us over alot. His Mother is a pretty red-head who really likes orange. His Grandmother lives with him, and his Father killed himself during the war. Neil wants to be a Gym Teacher. He has scraggily dark-red hair and green eyes. He's very active and even hyper sometimes. And has a collection of traffic tickets.

After a while. When she's continually asked to meet him, and it's been long enough to get all this information out. I'll tell her that he's fake. And explain how I created him.

Neil is the name of a character I created in a original story of mine. Although everyone in the story is a Naruto-character counter-part. Neil would be the main character, based off Naruto... Cersack is the last name I gave to the villian Janga from the Klonoa game series. 26 is Kakashi's age pre-Shippuden. Soccer is the hobby of Jimmy Kudo from Case Closed. Two antique swords given to him by his father is a refference to Sesshomaru from Inuyasha. Thomas is the name of the healer hero in the book series The Silver Sequence. Ex-Girlfriend Eileen is the counter-part for Ethine from the books Tithe and Ironside, Eileen being the human name Corny gives her when he has to introduce her to his Mother. The Friend Elliot, is the name of the hero in the NiGHTS game series. His Mother the pretty red-head who likes orange, is a reffrence to Naruto's own Mother. The Grandmother living with him is a loose reffrence to Sasori and Chiyo. And his Father killing himself during the war is a reffrence to Kakashi's father. Wanting to be a Gym Teacher is another loose reffrence to Guy, who makes the perfect Gym teacher. Red hair and Green eyes is a modern, male version of my heated rival. Sakura Haruno. His personality is taken from a modern version of Deidara, with a need-for-speed. If my Mother ever happens to ask about sex, I will comense in telling her the discribtion of every detailed Akatsuki Smut story I've ever read...

And, voila, we have a confused Mommy who still thinks I'm insane for wanting to be a eternal virgin XD

This is getting to be a long authors note, I'll stop now. I don't usually beg for reviews, but they help me get chapters out faster. I'll hope the upcoming drama will satisfy you. I'm not sure how good I can write drama.

It'll be here in a few chapters- but this is the before-mentioned chapter where we follow the Akatsuki home. It's just a middle tidbit- and doesn't really belong to the first or second season. I just love background stories.

!

** Okay, I can explain the prolonged time delay. On Wednesday, May 20, 2010. Me and my sister rented Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life. For 5 nights. So I was playing that the past 5 nights... And I'm gonna get my Granma to buy it for me- anyway. NOW, on Tuesday, May 25, 2010. I will continue writting and finish this chapter. The chapters after this are mostly already half-written. So there'll be some quick updates after that. NOW... I'll end this embarressingly long authors note -_-;

**-Family Portraits-**

Drifting off to sleep. I daydream about what might happen next. Maybe it'll just be hundreds of lazy days up to graduation? But at the same time I'm cheerful of what'll come. Not caring what it is, I'll be happy going through it all. At least I'm not alone.

It's only been a few days but so much has happened. Almost cornily perfect, like an amature Manga you buy at Comi-con for half price or something. Ah well.

But one of the things I'm wondering, while I'm- _yaaawn,_ falling off to sleep is. What past lifes my friends have. What's making them seek refuge from the world?

-Normal POV-Sasori's House

Sasori's never been good with showing his emotions single-handedly. His personality- and this is sometimes on purpose- usually comes out seeming cruel and unusual. And he usually wants to be seen as cruel and unusual. Because he's good at it, and he wants to be perfect at everything.

Not many know that either. _Deidara's_ the one always squabbling for attention. Not Sasori, no, never Sasori. Sasori doesn't care about what people think, Sasori doesn't have his heart skip a beat and his face go pale when someone betters him. Sasori has _never_ been vain. He's the loner, he's the jackass, he's a misfit.

His parents died when he was five years old. In a _car crash._ Sasori thinks sometimes- the _practical_ death in a story. Anybody could die in a car crash. Sometimes he's ashamed their demise could've been so _unoriginal._ At least that's what he thinks now.

Hit head-on by a suicidal drunk driver none-the-less. But there's some irony in it. The son of the drunk driver just happens to be Sasori's _fucking science teacher._ That's a new one. Not that he grudges against him at all. No, that would be too _emotional_ for Sasori.

But the other Akatsuki know about Sasori. Yahiko knew him back in the beggining. Back when he was still mourning his parents(_he still is, but if he showed it that'd be too emotional) _He knew him when Sasori was a wreak, the little tike hiding in the corner, drawing scribbles in his notebook. All the others know, because they're misfits too. Which makes Sasori wonder if his predicament is original or not.

He climbs the steep hill up towards his house. He's lived with his Grandmother since the accident. The crazy woman- Sasori always thinks.

He opens the door now and is about to run up the stairs before she can offer him something as trivial or normal as _food._ He hates the stuff, everything has always tasted bland to him.

"Dammit Sasori get your ass down here!" He screeches. The woman's about up his kneecaps, and we're talking about Sasori here- not exactly mister basketball champ. Doesn't make Deidara any less scared of her though.

Sasori grumbles and turns to go back down the stairs. Stops infront of her and leans on the stair railing waiting for a reason to have turned around.

Chiyo gives him that cocky-as-hell smile that pull all her wrinkles up and gives him the almost comical 'you are screwed now' look. "Have dinner, my love. And eat something, you look famished. Not good for your heart you know."

"I'm not hungry,"

"Oh really?"

"No, I ate something off the road today, it was delicious, tasted like your cooking. Goodnight Grandma." He trys the stairs again.

"Eat my fucking Popeye-Casserole before I shove the ladle I cooked it with up you're stuck-up ass and dig out all those dead bugs you have up there." His Grandmother's a creative woman, really.

Sasori rolled his eyes. She'd do it too. He knows it, a thousand times over. But her casserole was going to be stuffed with so much cheese that he'd need something up his ass. But he was also somewhat worried on why she would need a ladel to cook a casserole. Who knows, maybe she just felt like saying the word. She's like that sometimes.

He'd thrown his notebook to the top of the steps and turned back and followed her through the living room that had the far wall lined with stuffed-full bookcases. Chiyo always said that his parents practicly collected books.

He sat down at the white table that already had a bowl waiting for him. Chiyo sat on the chair across from him, gave the big ole' 'eat-or-die' smile and then started shoving it in her mouth. Another thing from the past- Sasori liked her cooking once. But now it all seemed like disgusting 'this-might-taste-good-with-this' food.

But- haha, Chiyo's a proud woman. And even when all seems lost she will not back down from her plans to get Sasori to react to something. Then Sasori brought friends home. Once Kakuzu ventured there. Sensible man, reminded her a bit of her late husband. Then there was Deidara, oh, Chiyo had fun torturing Deidara. And she'd had so much fun she'd pulled every trick possible to get the blonde to give her the 'WTF' look.

Sasori picks at it. And picks, and picks, and picks. Chiyo scoffs, she actually wishes the blonde was here. He'd be whining, and picking at Sasori(instead of the food. Which even Chiyo was certain he'd eat half of before losing interest. That's his attention span) Sasori finally puts the fork down and looks at it. There might be some noodles in there. He sees something round.

"I'm going to bed." He gets up and walks away.

"Ah you little pussy."

Sasori trudges through the living room and up the stairs. Snatching his notebook and escaping into his room. It had sand-colored carpet. Deidara'd begged him to let him paint his room. So much so that finally Sasori did it himself, there was a desert effect with a beautiful sunset. The blonde threw an absolute fit.

His bed is pale colors. There's an ever-watching shelf of porcelain china dolls. Wide sparkling eyes, pale painted skin, frilly dresses. Some even have the small smile to match the staring eyes. Everyone that sees them thinks they're eerie. Thousands of stories, about dolls and girls and burtal murders in the night. Sasori just thinks they're beautiful.

He has puppets too. And marionettes like elegant thin versions of the china dolls. He'll take them out and look at them. But the passion of using them died with his parents. Before then Chiyo was sure he'd be a puppeteer. He still thinks he is. Like a puppeteer and a puppet at the same time. The master and the used. But those thoughts are left for when memories try to flood back when he wants to sleep.

He ruffled through his backpack. The thing was so small- Chiyo convinced all his teachers to give him as little homework as possible because she saw a news story about how unhealthy it is for kids to have heavy backpacks. Sasori isn't healthy. Never mind that he hardly ever eats, he was born with a massive Heart mur-mur that was too big to treat with anything but rest. That's why everyone worries about him. And Sasori lets them, it's a guilty pleasure for attention. Not like Itachi, who brushes things that might be life-threatening for him off cause he wants them to worry about more importaint things. So noble, Sasori admires it.

Emotions, once again, are too much to say. There's anger though, that idiot Deidara could make Sasori pop a lid and lose his temper and go off like a old car roaring to life. And he hates it. Because hate always reminds you of love. Anger of joy. And Sasori's parents sometimes reapper in his head for a moment and he feels like scribbling things in his notebook again.

He's always drawn the world how he sees it. He looks at someone- the new girl, Konan. The angry princess on her throne. He gave her jewelery and that halo. Because she was a pretty girl, just horribly, horribly tainted at the time.

He draws Deidara in those sparkle and blinding things he wants to be wearing. The glits and glam he pretends to have. Sasori gave him something else though too. The first time Deidara pissed him off, Sasori'd won the argument. And then when he looked at Deidara pouting on the recess yards' school steps he drew it. He gave Deidara angel wings. Still doesn't quite remember why. Maybe it was just the look in his eyes.

Thinking over the day- he got to control the lights at the concert, like always. He still remembers when Deidara tried to pester him while doing it. And the look on his face only Sasori could see when the lights went out.

He rolls over in his bed and flips through his notebook. Stopping on a blank page that doesn't have indent scars. He starts on the scene when Itachi was on stage. Itachi never gets extras. Cause he seems like everything he could be. The pencil scratching the paper seems so calming. Sasori hadn't realized how deeply he was engrossed in the sound untill he realized the whole picture was done.

He turns the page again. But then he stops with literal writers block. After a few minutes of thinking, and getting only one idea. He puts the pencil on the paper and sketches his parents. But he was lulled to sleep before it was finished.

Chiyo tip-toed in a couple minutes later. Just because he's seventeen doesn't mean he's grown at all, Chiyo knows he's always been such a baby either way. She's long given up trying to take his shoes or jacket off in these situations. She pulls the notebook out and looks at his parents on the incomplete background. Closing it she folds the blanket over to at least covor him. Nights get cold.

Sasori made his own portrait. He writes how he sees things, so it's just a blank page. But Chiyo still has the baby pictures of his parents holding him, and her giving his mother bunny ears.

-Hidan's House

"Let go of me!"

"Noooo~" Hidan chimes pulling his captive, Kakuzu along with him. Down the hill and towards his house.

Kakuzu hates going to Hidan's house, he hates going anywhere _near_ it. He just wanted to go to his own house, where he was used to hating it.

Kakuzu's father is a Dean for Konoha University. He lives a couple of cities away near the school. Kakuzu used to go with him where ever he went for a while. Untill the Spring of a few years ago. Since then he's stayed in Ame, at the vacation home.

Hidan pulls him through the door of the tiny white house. "Mooommy~ I'm home!"

Hidan's mother, a practical, tired-looking woman came out from a doorway leading to the kitchen on the left. Still clichely causally cleaning a plate in her hand. "There you are, you missed dinner. Chi was balistic."

"Ah' she can bitch later." His mother had long ago abandoned the words 'watch your mouth'

Hidan still pulled him up the steps. In the doorway leading to the living room on the right was Hidan's uncle and grandfather visiting. He has a big family that apparently likes to breed like rabbits. If Hidan hadn't been so much trouble getting out of the womb he wouldn't be a only child.

Kakuzu swears he could name half of Hidan's relatives. They come over all the time. The house is almost never empty. Ever since Hidan saw the giant, practicly bare wooded boards that were called the rooms in Kakuzu's home he'd been intent on dragging Kakuzu over every time his attention span let him be reminded. Usually caused by remembering how much fun Hidan had making echoes in Kakuzu's living room.

Of course he was expected to go to the collage his father worked at. But that was never said out loud. Even Kakuzu remembers how all the future talk stopped after his mother died.

She'd gotten cancer somewhere around Kakuzu's elementry years. Foolish woman hesitated so long to tell them. She was always so strange like that, always spoiling Kakuzu with things he never wanted.

Right on cue Hidan's own mother, dressed in purple walks inside with a tray filled with a bottle of milk, two glasses and some cut apples. "Mom, ew!" Hidan whines.

"It's good for you, just eat it. Love you, don't keep Kakuzu up all night again." That was the usual goodbye whenever she brought a snack in. But then when she left the doorway. Chi replaced it. Feet far apart and hands on her hips in a dramatic 'I'm pissed' pose.

Kakuzu knew Chi wasn't her full name. Hidan usually calls her Cherry or something stupid. But it'd never really been mentioned. She was a pretty girl- apparently Hidan's cousin or something come to live with them. She had pale cherry-blossom hair and usually wore spring colors to match. Like now in her pink short-shorts and little-boys' tank top. "Hidan, you're late."

"Oh wah, you knew I'd be out awhile. Little bitch." 'Little bitch' also seemed to be a nickname. Hidan shoved one apple slice in his mouth for nuritment and then handed the rest to Kakuzu who'd went ahead to take a spot on Hidan's bed.

She half-stumpled-half-tackled the floor infront of Hidan to glare into his eyes. "Why do you always make promises you don't ever keep?"

"Why the fuck do you care!" Hidan exclaimed still with bit of apple his his mouth. Kakuzu's pretty sure he spit some on her face.

"I DON'T! Just don't tell me you'll do something and then don't do it!"

"I'll do whatever I want!"

"HIDAN!" One of his relatives yelled from downstairs.

Chi groaned loud and twirled up to leave the room, dramaticly stomping her feet. Kakuzu isn't exactly interested in dating at all, so he almost didn't notice what Hidan whistled at. "Love the underwear you little whore!"

Chi twirled around again glaring at him almost evily. She wears long skirts and sweaters at school but from what Kakuzu's seen she changes into shorts and some of Hidan's elementry hand-me-downs when she gets home. She for once doesn't have a comeback and, self-consiously, pulls her short's non-exsistaint legs down and bussles out of the room.

Kakuzu stares at Hidan whose laughing at the poor girls reaction. "She's your cousin,"

"She's a bitch!" Hidan trails off the last word with more laughter.

Kakuzu actively rolls his eyes and fall back on Hidan's bed.

Hidan's room is one of the lesser works of Deidara's room-painting fetish. After explaining that Hidan just doesn't really 'have much personality'. Deidara painted it a bright white. At the bottom was a thick light blue line going all around, and in the middle of the blue was a pink line that matched Hidan's strange pinkish eyes. His mother said that they kind of faded that way from a light brown. Hidan just complains it makes him look gay.(The eyes _and_ the room,)

Hidan's latest stunt, (which was jumping out his window for kicks and breaking his wrist) Got his Xbox put in the closet. Which Hidan actually went on a very lengthy mission with Deidara and Itachi to find the key to. But it was finally stopped and post-poned when the teammates he asked to help wouldn't stop squabbling. (As in Deidara attempted to enter a wrestling match with Itachi, who side-stepped away from the blonde who then stumbled off the porch and onto his face, right infront of Yahiko, Sasori and Kisame...)

But those are the things Hidan does. Kakuzu makes note on how the man _never_ thinks before doing something. Like- maybe if he tried to race across the tracks that giant Train blasting threw might run him over... They thought he was dead that time, untill the Train passed to have Hidan laughing on the other side. That stunt earned him a joint beating from Yahiko, Kakuzu himself, and a rather upset Deidara.

Kakuzu attempted a brotherly talk with Hidan once, telling him that he needs to be more careful before he gets himself killed or jailed. But that failed badly. Because Hidan answered that with later by eating lunch with his feet dangling off the schools roof.

Kakuzu had to desipher Hidan's not-quite-rebelious-hes-just-like-that-attitude himself. And Hidan dragging him to his house every other day helped at that.

Hidan gets sent to the Principal's almost daily. He's almost never without a current broken bone. He swears like a Pirate (Not a Sailor, a Pirate.). He's gotten both the schoolboard and local authorities to hate him. Skipped as many faily outtings as humanly possible. And some markings around his room suggest he's some sort of satanist. (One of the few school rumors that're actually true.) And Kakuzu's been able to conclude it because of one thing.

Hidan's family almost desperetly wants Hidan to follow in the family Buisness. Some really successful company that sells really simple things. But the thing that it doesn't take to much to figure out is- Hidan has never wanted to just be _normal._

No one's sure why he wouldn't be content in having a guarented perfect, calm life. But that's just like no one's sure why Deidara hates attention being drawn away from him, or Kakuzu not being content in seeing the Akatsuki only in Summers. Or why Yahiko just wouldn't leave Konan alone when she tried to drift away.

Hidan, plain and simple. Just doesn't want to be forgotten to the world. Or, something along those lines. It doesn't stop Hidan though, from being a normally rowdy boy. Or, the strange sense of intelligence in his eyes that his personality seems to deny.(Kakuzu mentally kicks himself for having the word 'Intelligence' and 'Hidan' in the same sentance.)

Kakuzu's been dazed out looking at the textured ceiling before Hidan nudges him from his spot on the floor. " Ey'. Help me get my Xbox."

"Hidan, they'll just hear you playing it and take it away again..." Hidan is very vocal when he's doing things.

He seems to take a moment to let himself 'realize' this. And then he blinks. "... We could lock the door. Can't take it when they can't get in."

"Okay, Hidan, listen. One, I refuse to be locked in a small room with you under _any_ circumstances. And two, the last time you locked your door, Chi climbed threw your window."

The 'Oh _yeaaaaaaah'_ look dawned on the boys face. And this was the kind of moment when Kakuzu wondered why he would ever even think to attempt and _speak_ to Hidan, the god of idiotic douchbags everywhere.

"...Well then whaddaya wanna do?"

"I _want_ to go home."

"...Why?"

-Later

And so, the two had ended up sitting there like idiots silent for a rather long time. Untill Hidan's Mother entered and told them that everyone else was going to bed. And Kakuzu decided to lay down.

The last time Hidan fought Kakuzu for _his_ bed. Kakuzu snuck out in the middle of the night. So, Hidan gets his beanbag chair to sleep in. Seeing as how the Hidan can sleep through anything, no matter where he is. Kakuzu wonders why he always wakes up in the middle of the night.

He rolls over to before mentioned idiot. Who has slid off the beanbag and is sprawled across the floor, snoring loudly. Kakuzu rolls his eyes and groans loudly. Then leaving the room.

He goes across the hall to the bathroom. Chi's door is cracked open, with pink light from a lava lamp half-lighting the hall. He can hear her faintly breathing too. He clicks that bathroom door shut gently, for her only.

Without turning the light on he takes off his bandana to let his face breath a while. He's not self-consious about the scars on his face, just got tired of people assuming how he's gotten them.

One day at the Hospital visiting his Mother. Little Kakuzu had convieniantly grabbed for a knapkin on a high table and pulled down a box of surgical knifes with it. The doctors said it was some of the chemicals on the knifes that kept the scars from going away.

But, that's all in the past. Kakuzu doesn't care about any of that anymore. But he still thinks about it, everytime Hidan draggs him over. Kakuzu gets reminded of his own ditzy Mother and the Father that hasn't been around since she died.

Kakuzu shakes his head absently and retreats back to Hidan's room. The king of idiots is on his bean-bag throne snoring like a active volcano. Kakuzu just clenches his eyes shut and covers his head with a pillow.

Kakuzu's portrait is empty. Hidan's portrait is full, but Hidan's making faces at the camera and everyone from his grandmother to his cousin are glaring at him. But Hidan's doing it to try and coax Kakuzu into the shot to wack him.

-Deidara's Home

Deidara kicks dust up as he slowly trudges to his house. It's only about two houses away from Hidan's. But Hidan had dragged Kakuzu inside his house before Deidara ever looked up.

He wanted to go knock on the door and ask if he could join in. But he was there two nights ago.

Sasori was another option. But Deidara always thinks he'd just slam the door in his face.

And he didn't want to bother Kisame. He already does enough for Deidara, he doesn't have to be a host for him too.

Which leaves Dei with his own home. The one he hasn't spent the night at in a week. And Deidara has to take a deep breath before opening the door.

Most of the house is a pastel yellow. Supposed to signify sunshine but only gives Deidara the taste of lemons. The adults are on the couch watching the TV. His Mother turns around, her bleached hair brushing the back of the burnt orange couch. "You're really still alive?" Her voice is getting harder with the cigerettes. But Deidara's neevr taken the time to memorize the sound of her voice like most children do.

Deidara fights back a smirk and grunts a reply trodding up the stairs. Her hair wasn't always yellow like the walls, she dyed it after he was born. Even while she was pregnant with his little sister. Because she didn't want anyone to notice that Deidara's the only one in the 'family' with blonde hair. Everyone else has natural dark hair. Especially the man his Mother's married to.

Both of them always strived for the picture of perfection. One slip up, and Deidara's the scar of that. The scar they tried to cover up by denying and practically disowning him.

Deidara was never at a family function. They leave him home and claim he's caught the flu. _Again._

He's thought of just running away millions of times. One of the reasons he stuck around with the Akatsuki, because they all want to run away. And they're gonna do it. Eventually.

And another reason is that he wouldn't dare to _think_ of leaving his presious, perfect, spoiled sister alone with them like that.

She's probably in her room. So Deidara heads for his, 'they' don't like them talking. 'They' want her to disown him too. But she's a stubborn bitch like that. And Deidara loves his sister.

Deidara's convinced the rooms he's been put in used to be a storage closet. There's only three rooms on the second floor of the tiny house. His room had the walls decorated with what looks like thousands of tiny, rainbow fireworks. Deidara was going to leave it blank, but one time when his family was away, and Deidara'd just met up with the others. He ran away for awhile. Not really, just spent the day moping in the woods. When he'd got back this was what his room looked like.

Sasori's not nice enough to have done it. But Deidara has always admired him as a friend none-the-less. But the only other one with the talent for this, Deidara knows, is Itachi.

Deidara's wanted to take a knife to the walls on more then one occation. But, '_To destroy perfection is redemption. But what redemption is worth the cost of love?'_

He doesn't recall where he found the phrase, but it works. Because he admires Itachi too, he hates it. But it's there.

He hates admiring Sasori so much too. But he can't stop, and he can't stand it.

Just like he's stuck to Akatsuki like a magnet. He would have withered up and died a long time ago without them. He's lost his sanity, but he hasn't lost life. Not yet anyway. Deidara never cared much for exsistance when he was little. Akatsuki gave him something to live for. And living for them is redemption enough.

Deidara doesn't remember when he started calling himself an artist. Maybe because the sense of having created something gives the sense of freedom. The fact that you put something in the world ment that you belonged in it. Deidara's head was full of fevered dreams that he was going to make real. Even if it killed him, but whenever he envisions them happening, lately, he's seen people by his side.

_Living for his friends_ is good enough.

Boredom. However, can get to you sometimes. It's so boring at his house. The only things in his room is a tattered, dyed-a-million-diffrent-colors-a-million-diffrent-times-cot, a mannequin he uses to customize his clothes and some buckets of paint he throws at it to change the colors of his white clothes. Most of the room smells like bleach too. For when he changes his mind. Which he also does alot.

Best of all. He forgot to open his window. So the room smells rancid. He pushes the frame up as hard as he can, some of the mannequin's paint splattered on it and now it magically re-paints itself shut whenever he closes it.

It cracks open and he has to shove it the rest of the way and the prop it open. Because once it _is_ open, it wants to snap shut on Deidara's neck. Because his house is just plain evil, and wants to kill him. It's a big, evil, cramped, lemon monster. This is what he has decided.

Not to be mistaken with Sasori, the short, evil, constipated, strawberry monster. Who also wants to kill him.

Deidara throws his head out the window and takes a deep breath. But he still takes in a big lungfull of the toxins and starts gagging. Then he hears the silver bells laughing at him.

"What the hell have _you_ been smoking?" Kurotsuchi laughes at her heaving brother hanging out his window.

Deidara hangs there untill he gets a clean breath. "Blah, blah... Poppie seeds..." He randomly replies.

Kurotsuchi giggles again. "No comeback. So out-of-character for the king of smartasses."

"Yeah, well. I'm dying, you'll get your money back don't worry." Kurotsuchi switches to sitting on her window pane while watching him.

"I saw that thing fall on Itachi's head the other day. What happened?"

Deidara tched, "He's alive, hmmm."

Kurotsuchi flipped her leggs around to dangle out the window. She's as fidgetty as Deidara sometimes. " Heather Sabako said something pushed it down."

Deidara smirked again. "Heather's a dweeb."

"But she's not a liar~" She chimes. Deidara looks over at her, she fell out that window once. Started laughing histaricly on the way to the Hospital too. For a moment she dissapears back inside her window before hanging her head out of it again. "Hungry?"

Somewhere along the line, Yahiko got some of the others together to put a supply line so Kurotsuchi and Deidara could pull things up from a basket, the line was rigged to go across to so they could pass things to eachother. Kuro grabbed her basket and passed it to his side.

Deidara grabbed the handle a peeked inside. "...Yum, rice." He groaned.

"It was all we ate tonight." Kurotsuchi whined.

Deidara grabbed a handfull of it and put it in his mouth. Then he dropped the paper plate onto the ground below. "It's too salty too."

For some reason that made her start laughing. Deidara looked down to the darkening shadows below, and Smokey the dog hobbled over to eat what he'd thrown down.

"What you guys been doin?" Deidara looked back up at her when she asked.

"You see Konan? Yahiko's newest recruit?"

"Big-boobed bluette? She's hot~"

"No flippin' kiddin," Kurotsuchi just laughed again.

"What else?" Deidara crossed his arm and searched his memories for something she'd want to hear.

"The usual, really."

"Have you confessed your undying love to your boyfriend yet?"

Deidara pounded his head on the window pane. "You're fucking sick."

"You're fucking gay."

"I think you are too." Kurotsuchi did a fake gasp and 'fainted'. A couple seconds later she leaned out the window again and Deidara'd retreated to inside.

"Dei-Chan~~~ I was kidding! I know you're a player okay? Peace! PEACE!"

Deidara's blonde tuff poked out the window again. "No, you think I'm gay, just like everyone else. You bitch." He droaned in monotone.

"You're not gay you're just in love with someone who has a penis honey!" Deidara lost his composure and started laughing at that.

"I love you Kuro-face."

"Ewww~ Incest." Deidara shoved his window shut again, with a loud clack it closed and he sat on the floor trying to think of what to do next.

Nothing. He was bored. And bored makes him question exsistance again. Maybe he could stop it all and just forget. Light a match in this room and it could just blow up. But, these are the times where he remembers things to life for.

Right now he's living. And he has to remember he's happy with that. Nothing else matters. He's happy he's living with Akatsuki.

Deidara's portrait looks happy. It's just that Deidara's face has long since been cut off. But he remembers that doesn't matter any more.

-Kisame's House

_I'm blue, da-blu-di-da-blu-dai_

Kisame _really_ hates that song. It plays in one of his neighbours houses as he passes...

And Kisame Hoshigaki doesn't hate very many things. The taste of Shark Fin Soup he hates, but everyone manages to make fun of _that_ too.

What's wrong with blue anyway? These peoples ancestors finally warmed up to brown, how is blue so much diffrent?

He hates Itachi sometimes. Because that boy doesn't hate anything, and it's envious. But there's many things about Itachi that people are envious about. Yahiko's envious of Itachi's leading skills. Kisame and Sasori are envious of Itachi's uncanny empathy. Deidara's envious of Itachi's every bone, bloodcell and skin flake.

But that's also the exact reason Kisame's so close with Itachi. Not just because he has that string-pulling aura, but Kisame wonders if it will ever rub off on him.

Kisame also wonders if it's all genetic, because his young brother also has the envious aura. And his precious boyfriend Naruto never even notices it, infact he surpasses it. Covered in annoying-ness and naivity.

So sometimes it's not surprising when Kisame imagines being in the shoes of someone else every once and a while. He's surrounded by such characters, his chaotic group of misfit friends. And he's the _blue_ one. It's too funny, Kisa has to admit he isn't offended at all.

Not embarressed to be the unsightly 'older brother figure' in the group of boys too pretty for their own good. Which is admittedly why he likes their newbie Konan. She's not disgusted by the apperance. Just utterly confused. And that might be one of the things that got Yahiko to hang on to her, because she never once made fun of any of them anymore then they do to eachothers faces.

Except with Sasori. But everybody hates Sasori, even Deidara hates Sasori. And Deidara loves Sasori.

Kisame even started laughing to himself at the first few ridculous attempts Konan made to flirt with Itachi. But many have tried, and all have failed. Which adds to the schools social's making rumors about them all being gay. Because they're not drooling jocks leaning over every cheerleader that passes their locker? This town is so steriotypical. It's an insult to the world.

That's another thing. Kisame rarely thinks about himself. Almost never, he rarely thinks- 'if I do this for you I have a 95% chance of dying'. He's just like 'and when does this need to be done by?'

There are times when he does think this, but he always thinks so highly of whoevers asking, he'll do it regardless. Which works in Akatsuki.

There was the time back when he first joined, and him and Kakuzu, being the oldest out of the group, (Not including Sasori, cause everyone hates Sasori, and Sasori hates everyone, so figure it out) Kakuzu got the plan to raise funds for their group to share. (Kakuzu also proposed that they could both get extra shares since they raised it. Knowing Kisame would deny the benefit)

Lemonade stands, Sketchbooths, (Few know all of Kakuzu's talents) Sovenier tables. Mini-Hospital's. Car Washes (Kisame doesn't remember how Kakuzu talked Sasori into that one. But he does remember how wrong the plan went.)

In the end, they made a total of 25 dollars that was inevitably spent on snacks at the Beach Jiraiya took them to.

Which leads to Kisame's current location: His room. Deidara is a very observant person, but it doesn't take that trait to have noticed that Kisame spent the entire time in the water. Even when the coast guard called everyone in, Kisame was still at the very edge of the shoreline, making soggy sandcastles with Itachi, like they were five-year-olds.

Kisame personally has no flippin' idea of why Deidara has a unearthly obsession with painting all his friends' rooms. And he sometimes doesn't want to know why.

But when Deidara asked to finally paint Kisame's previously wallpapered room. Kisame let him out of his love for the annoying little spit-fire. Kisame returned from the market with a room full of beautiful waves against a pink sunsetted background. Kisame loved it, and then noogied Deidara, for making another 'you-look-like-a-giant-shark-monster' refference.

Kisame later humorfully bought a surfboard to hang on the wall. Bwhahaha.

Other then that, Kisa's room is virtually empty. There's a dresser Deidara painted dull red to match the sunset, his bed. A endtable, and he filled the emptyness on his south wall with a ever-present navy blue sleeping bag for when Deidara stays over. (That kids the literal baby of Akatsuki, Kisame can't get enough of him)

But regardless of all that. Kisame moves into his kitchen to eat a late-night snack before falling back on his bed and passing out. And decided to just take the tupperware full of Alfredo and dump it in a pot to reheat.

He sit's at the little table in his kitchen to continue to daydream. Rubbing his hands trying to stay awake(it can get extreamly boring when you're alone. Even if it's for five minutes). He picks at his palms, he's always had dry skin(A very logical reason for liking water, he thinks). Asshole-Sasori once said the dead skin flakes looked like scales. This close to punching that round red face into the back of his head.

But he's seen the boy in gentler times.(Hard to call him a boy when he only juniors Kisame by about eight months) He still remembers when he'd just joined, back when Sasori was still shy as hell. Just as stubborn, but he had the habit of hiding behind Kakuzu all the time. Then Deidara came, and Sasori came out to beat him up.

From arguing to whining. Everyone just acts like a bunch of children. There was on time where they had to track down Hidan after he decided to take a hike and get lost. And they all spent the night at a spanish womans house on the way back. Itachi and Deidara both fell in love with a litter of kittens her cat had. Started naming them all and wouldn't put the down. Kisame had to catch Deidara before he put one in his pocket. (He might have though, because after that there was a stray cat around these parts that looked exactly like the kittens)

Not to mention when everyone found out Kakuzu had three diffrent consoles and numerous games after a fase where his Father thought he was like normal kids that liked that stuff. So Everyone kept ransacking his house to play games... Untill one day when the entire collection dissapeared without a trace, and Kakuzu had to hold Hidan from calling the cops to report an alien abduction.

Opp, crap. Forgot the food. Yup, burnt Alfredo, it exsists. And doesn't taste too hot.

He mixes it all up and starts chowing by the fork-full. Ignoring the flaky, dried noodles.

Yes, Kisame always thinks more of the people around him then ever of himself. Which reminds him of his annoying cousin Zabuza, with the little fangirl- er, boy. Or, Kisame can't really tell. He comes over every so often to remind Kisame they hate eachother. But that's a long story that Kisa's too tired to go over...

Kisame needs to remind himself he doesn't like hating things though. But sometimes it's too hard not too. He can completely forget things though. He can forget dates untill Deidara's pounding on his window to wake him up. He can forget to care when Itachi stops to tend to someone he's never met in need. He very often forgets why people don't like any of them, but then there isn't a reason to forget most of the time.

Through spending all his time with Akatsuki, he can forget he lives in a house alone most the time. While his Father is away on buisness, and his Mother is who knows where trying to forget she has a life.

Kisame can't find his portrait, he thinks he might have spilled juice on it.

-Itachi and Sasuke's House

"_Coughcoughcough"_

"Are you sure you're fine?"

"_I'm sure _Sasuke." He just needs to cough up one lung a day. It's normal.

When Sasuke was little he'd sit on Itachi's shoulders with him all day. School was the evil that made him let go so they could go to seperate classes. Sasuke's too big to sit on his shoulders now, but Itachi still catches him clutching an arm whenever they're together.

They walk up the creaking steps in the building. They're all textured like they could be made of hay and could fall apart any second. But they haven't yet~

When they're at the top of the stairwell, Sasuke bussles ahead to light the candles.

Itachi never tries to impose and ask his friends if he can stay over. He knows Deidara already does it, and Itachi himself believes his problems are much less worse then Deidara's. At least his crazy parents aren't around anymore.

But he always tries to get Sasuke to stay somewhere. Naruto was a sign sent from Heaven, Sasuke wouldn't have lasted this long without him. The trauma scarred the barely-13-year-old forever more. Itachi always has to keep an eye on him.

Sasuke keeps an eye on him too. Akatsuki was a sign sent from Heaven, Itachi wouldn't have lasted this long without them.

But Itachi's the one that needs to remind Sasuke every once and a while. '_it was accident. Neither of us could do anything. Or else we would've been hurt too.'_ Sasuke just isn't always in the right mind to listen.

Itachi needs people to worry about, people to live for. It's what's been keeping him moving. Sasuke needs a purpose, and Itachi's trying to get him to see that his purpose is to just _live._

If only he hadn't inherited their Father's stubborness. Itachi did too though, but it's a good thing with him.

The room's illuminated now. At least the area they stick too. The one they're both 100% sure won't cave in. That has all the pillows and blankets that both Kisame and Naruto keep giving to them.

Itachi has to beg them to stop giving them clothes, (The cardboard box can only hold so much) Itachi does the odd jobs all around town trying to get a fund of some sort for them to live off of. It was making him the 'most liked/least hated' member of Akatsuki to everyone. Untill one rumor started at school got around that the money was to support a drug habit. (The bags under his eyes are from his Father. And maybe a few months of no sleep when little Sasuke thought their building was haunted.)

Yahiko was convinced Kagura started it because Itachi wasn't interested in her at all. She used to be so desperate to get attention from him, she even pretended to be nice. When Yahiko finally intervined she blew a gasket and was determined to make their lifes hell.(It already was really. Akatsuki was the cliche club for angsting teenagers. And not just any angst, this was real honest-to-the-god-half-of-them-didn't-believe-in angst.)

The truth is, The Uchiha boys have no honest way to register flirting. It's like a trait, given to them to prevent over-populating the world.

Itachi only ever really had one real love in his life. His cousin that had an air about her, oh the irony. And he left it all.

Because his biggest love was Sasuke. He wouldn't hesitate to end to world for him. But he knows that sad thing was that Sasuke would do the same for him. And not for a soul more. Naruto has to kick it into gear before Sasu turns serial killer.

Okay, bad thought, Itachi thinks... But the locked-in personal he displays most of the time can scare the living hell out of an overly protective older brother.

Sasuke finishes and takes a place across from Itachi on the floor in the huddle of blankets. The flickering flames makeing their shadows quaint company. Sasuke used to be terrified with flames after the incident. Which didn't mesh well with Itachi's sudden fear of darkness brought on at the same time.

That's all he could see the first time. Blackness, it hadn't lasted but in those few moments he'd thought about everyone he wouldn't see again. His eyesights still damaged by the flames, he can barely see two feet infront of him nowadays. (He _wants_ to say it's getting better. But he can at least say it isn't getting worse)

He hasn't gotten glasses because that would call for giving out too much personal information. And besides, Kakuzu gave him a pair of his Father's old steriotype-thick pair and it hardly made a diffrence.

Itachi can still see Sasuke though, even in this light. Like his memory won't let him forget every wrinkle in his shirt and every unarranged tuff of hair. It makes him smile. And he can see Sasuke's averted glance while he smirks at nothing.

"What're you doing tomarrow?" Itachi asks almost absent-mindly while breaking the comfortable silence.

"Naruto has a forest crusade he wants to set out on." He replies, smoothing out his shirt so it looks like he's doing something. "It'll last about three days at least."

A meek chuckle and Itachi lets the silence envelope again. It makes him soothingly tired just sitting there.

Sasuke drifts to the side and pulls a blanket around to make it more animate that he's doing _something._ Itachi just thinks back to his day. (Doing the encores at the concert always takes a toll. But he volenteered, and no one says no to Itachi, even if he's about to kill himself.)

With a sigh Itachi leans back onto the wall behind him. This area his coated with an array of posters they got from where ever they could find them. Just something to cover the walls. Itachi looks at Sasuke who is so engorged in batting his blanket he looks like a finicky cat.

"You're bored,"

"...What made you guess?" Itachi does another soft chuckle. Mainly because it took Sasuke a second to avert attention away from the blanket and register the statement.

Itachi, is of course bored out of his skull too. Reason number 3# he's just sitting there, trying to stay awake and staring at Sasuke's every movement.

Sasuke opens his mouth for a yawn and looks more like a cat. Making Itachi have to laugh aloud this time.

"Why are you laughing at me?"

"Because you're so subtly ridculous." He just can't stop giggling at Sasuke's 'confused-as-hell' face that's staring at him right now.

"Are you mocking me?"

"Course' not foolish little brother."

Sasuke almost self-consiously sits up. Resting head on hand in a 'I'm-so-cool' pout that made Itachi laugh louder and Sasuke go crazy with his 'confused-as-hell' face.

Sasuke gets close to the fetal position. Trying to ignore his wondering of the things _mentally wrong_ with his brother.

Itachi just sits up. Picking up a randomly placed nail to dig the floor with. "Tired?"

"Hn," But that was followed with another yawn.

"You _can_ go to sleep you know."

"Hn," Alittle annoyed that time. But all the same in natural sibling rivalry. "What about you?"

"Bored," Honesty is nice~

Sasuke sits there dumbfounded for a second(Itachi gets him that way alot) Itachi absently rubbed his bandage from the convieniant pipe falling on his head. Sasuke twitches a moment making Itachi look up. Before Sasuke lays completely down and shuts his eyes almost forcibly.

Sasuke had just the same blood disease, it being genetic. But his was so much less severe it was like it wasn't there. He's gotten thousands of scrapes and cuts by just being near Naruto, not one Hospital visit, not a single blood transfusion where they had to sneak out of the Hospital right after to keep from giving too much information.

If it wern't for their connections with Shizune, the school nurse, they might not've made it this far. Just another dallop of luck provided for the infamous Uchiha brothers.

One of which has quickly dozed to sleep. And is snoring so quietly it's like a lullyby to Itachi.

Itachi's damaged portrait consists of him and his brother. Itachi calls it the most perfect thing in the world. But Sasuke still refers to it as a beautiful disaster.

-Jiraiya's House

There's thousands of problems with Yahiko's life. Mainly because he takes the burden of everyone else on him. The sole reason he's agreed to be such a guide throughout all of this.

But that's all the sappy stuff, and we already saw all that with the others...

Yahiko gets up to help Jiraiya get Yugito ready. Just because he wants to be of use to everyone he meets. Konan's door is slightly ajar. He peeks in when no one sees to the little princess looking less then mighty and mean dozing soundly in her princess bed.

Yahiko has the perfect portrait, it's pictured right in his mind. Of him and the rest of Akatsuki raising chaos. Even Konan's in it. And it's his favorite picture.

**-End Chapter-**

...Okay, it took long to write again because I re-found my love for my Sims 2 PS2 game. And me and my sister also rented Dog's Life, and Tomb Raider: Legend. And I was playing around with my Titanic: Adventure out of Time game again. YAY! I FIGURED OUT HOW TO SAVE LADY GEORGIA AND STILL KEEP HITLERS PAINTING! WEEEE!...

And we found a Kitty. Her names Gabby, but no one knows that her REAL NAME is NEKO!... My Mom's upset cause we probably won't get to keep her when my aunt moves out... . (The funny thing is, the day we got her, but before we knew she was coming. Me and my sister did a roleplay where Itachi and Deidara fall in love with a litter of kittens... That's where Kisame's one flashback came from... Itachi's was named Teme and Deidara's was Detonate!)

And Mommy's taking us to the beach regularly. I still have a sunburned nose, and I have yet to wash the lake water out of my hair, I'm been wearing it out-of-characterly-for-me-back because it looks like crap XD

Oh, and, when I started writting Deidara's scene, I kept calling him a she/her XD

I know Kurotsuchi isn't his sister, but I think she might be a cousin, or a really close family friend at least. I want Kishimoto to explain that. But anyway. I made Kurotsuchi the little sister just cuz- well. Deidara just seems twice as hot when he's the 'cool older brother'

(Is currently tempted to write story with Kuro as the star and Dei as the hunky older brother.) Oh! I could do that! Hey readers! when this is done who wants me to write a story starring the under-mentioned characters? I'm tempted now! WEEEE!

Sasori's part was easy to write. I love making Chiyo-Kun as sadistic as him. Haha, it runs in the family~

And Hidan gets the HAPPY FAMILY! BWHAHAA!

Kakuzu... well, now that he's a zombie, I hope we get to learn more about his personality in the series. Cuz all I can think of when I think of him is Money, and yelling at Hidan...

Itachi and Sasu are homeless. I'm so mean... You'll learn some of that later... Actually, I just realized I killed their parents in a fire in both this and COATM... Eh, befitting of the Uchiha Nazi's... PS I couldn't resist the foolish little brother bit...

Where as Kisame seems to work for me as the older brother of Akatsuki... 'The nice one' ... yes, it works well. But I feel I could have done him better justice. You have no idea how hard it was to write him. He's the only one I REALLY got writers block for. I wrote some for him but I couldn't just end it when I ran out of ideas to talk about, cause then his thing was going to be the shortest in the chapter. AND I WILL NOT ALLOW THAT!... Also, when I finally pushed myself to sit there and write something. A storm was going on, the power already went out twice, and I was paranoid as hell... Cause I HAVE WRITTEN entire chapters of stories, and the the power goes out... Annnnd, yeah... So anyway... Also, burnt alfredo exsists! My Mom made it once and she got all upset!... And so do burnt noodles... I made that... I forgot I was cooking Ramen and started watching The Little Mermaid...

We didn't get to hear anything about Pain? WTF? XD Don't worry, we'll find out about him eventually... and it'll probably come out blunt. I dunno, I write very bluntly sometimes. So I need a main character who can say that 'wow that was blunt'

I'll end this authors note now. The next chapter shouldn't be too late. And the ones after that SHOULD come quickly, these are the parts I've been waiting to write.

Here's the count-down kiddies. Our presious Tobi is due to apper in chapter-... 13! YAY! (The overall story should be 20 chapters long I believe... Did I already say this?)

Yup, the ideas are comin'... who's for a story starring Kurotsuchi? BWHAHAHAAA! (Plot ideas are VERY welcome!)

... I need to stop with the insanely long Authors notes, I know... But I probably won't...


	9. Good Fortunes

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else used in this story... Cept Bri and a few background characters...

OOOOOKAAAAY...

FanFiction . net is annoying me... I have to seperate authors notes diffrently~... AGH!

Buuuut, okay. Nothing big happens till' the end of the chapter... Yaaawn,

Me an' my sissy gotted Resident Evil Outbreak 2...

We're in a abandoned Hospital, being chased by an Axe Murderer, surrounded by zombies and there's living, man-eating plants on the walls... Yay.

Sooooo... I've been playing the Hook-Up game on TeenNick... Claire is so annoying, Dylan too. I know Claire has a nice side but I don't care to look for it. And Dylan's just a corny hornydog.

Continueing on~~~

I like Sara and Justin, and I'm trying to re-do my conversation with Matthew about Sara, because the game messed up and I couldn't save it after the last time I did it. But all Matthew wants to do is take me to the Great Wall, and talk about Justin, and talk about Melissa, and I know he's not gay, because I also failed to save the part where he tells me he's crushing on Stephanie... AND CLAIRE WON'T STOP PICKING FIGHTS WITH ME IT'S DAMNED ANNOYING!...

I'll stop talking now. Continuing on~~~

**-Good Fortunes-**

"It was a test, Konan."

"A test? A motherfucking _test?_" I grumbled under my breath. Yahiko'd woken me up extra early this morning, so that we could have a romantic, light-bulb lit breakfast. How sweet. "You deserted me clueless to _test_ if I _cared_ enough?"

He just laughed again. He'd told me that the reason he ditched me to the concert last night was to see how worthy I was. If I'd actually go through the trouble to look for them. Which I did, because I have no life seperate from these fools

"...The least you coulda' done was warn me you would test me." Was all I could come up with after moments of silence. The metal bastard just laughed at me again.

Luckily Jiraiya trampled down the stairs. Saving me from making anymore bad comebacks. "What're you twerps doing alone~?" He called. Fake dread in his voice.

"Make me coffee." Yahiko scoffed.

Jiraiya saluted. "Yes mastah!"

I made a whipping noise that had them laughing at me again. I guess that's what woke up Naruto who started moaning like a ghost-whore upstairs. Mom'd already went to work. Her schedule's apparently 5am to 1pm.

Jiraiya jumbled coffee cups around. I don't think he has one without a corny joke on it. I got one that said 'I-lipstickmark-Michael Jackson' But now when I think of Michael Jackson I either flashback on Itachi or think about Art Teach Orochimaru... That's a creepy combination...

Naruto basicly rolled down the stairs to us. Clutching a pillow. And wearing a angry-frog nightcap that looks like it's eating his head. Naruto mumbled things on the floor infront of the steps a few minutes. I looked back at Yahiko. He tapped his glass on the saying. Another Modern Faery Tales refference. 'I can drink more Coffee then you'. And there goes my composure.

"How's school goin' Ko?" Jiraiya asked sitting down in his own chair. Ignoring Naruto who I think was snoring again. I absently took note of his mugs logo reading 'Babe Machine'

"I hate everybody."

"And?"

"Yahiko's stalking me. Do you know what the other students say about Yahiko's friends?"

"They're just jealous because Yiki has a Ouran High Host Club-esque group of friends." Jiraiya did not just make a flippin' Anime refference. He is such a child... But I already knew that.

But then again he _is_ 100% correct.

Naruto rolled and crawled himself over to us. "...Me...Ti... phone... hoooome..."

"No tea, drink coffee." Was Jiraiya's reply.

"Is it the weekend yet?" I grumbled taking a deep swig of coffee.

"One more day." Yahiko mused. "We'll be meeting the others at the bus stop today."

Plan. Another drink of coffee... glug, glug, glug. And I'm awake.

-Later

"Are you ready yet!" Naruto-Chan yelled from the bottom of the steps.

"Not yet!"

"We're gonna be late." Yahiko called.

"We have five minutes!"

"We're gonna be late for being early."

"Shut up I'm buttoning things!"

He mumbled something else but I couldn't make it out. Something about being gay.

I was digging through my wardrobe for something that wasn't slutty but still cute. Because I'm a vain bitch and this is my payback to Yahiko. I got a tube-top that's bottom spread out like a canopy around my waist and a short-sleaved jean-jacket thing over it. Fitted Blue jeans that took me five minutes to get on- If I hadn't ripped off my false nails last night they probably would have chipped trying to button the thing.

I still had those five minutes left, so. Looking down at the blankness on my hands I dug through one of my old purses for black nailpolish. Torture Yahiko some more.

Actually, I think his nails were painted too. And Itachi's... And Hidan's... I know Deidara's are- but that's probably because he's gay-as-rainbows.

I blow them dry- I make a horrible girl. I always think they're perfectly dry and then I get them all smudged up. But I guess I'll start caring less and less once these men start turning me into a tomboy.

Ha, all my friends are guys. Now I'm one of those girls I used to call an orgy whore.

I blow harder like I believe that'll make them really dry. Five minutes are up~ how quaint.

"KOOOOONAAAAAN!"

"Just a second!"

I pick up my bookbag, in too much of a hurry to fully worry if I forgot anything. Hussle down the stairs where Yahiko's holding the screendoor open and it's a mad dash between all three of us towards the buses.

Thankfully wearing flats today. I sprint ahead to snatch the bus on the left while shoving past Deidara and Sasori in perfect timing.

Yahiko joins me shortly after. Turning around Naruto's finish line had been Sasuke, who was now consumed in a very tight holding from the blond who seems to have forgotten they're supposed to get on the buses.

Yahiko sits us down in the front row(Bastard still steals the window seat). Sakura arrives and drags Naruto onto our bus just as the driver presses the button for the doors.

Sakura wedges inbetween her boy-toys in the seat behind us. Naruto starts talking, Sasuke seems to be dreading exsistance, Yahiko's trying not to laugh, and if I turn around I can see Sasori heatedly trying to choke Deidara.

And so my day begins~

-School-History Class

Yahiko is the only one I share my History class with I see. My Teacher, the painfully beautiful Kurenai Yuhi, sits quaintly behind her dark-wooded desk. Set behind her in contrast to and the brown is the green chalkboard, which currently bares her cursive writtings of todays Hiroshima subject.

My old school barely touched that subject, like it was illegal to teach. Our History textbooks were full of things that 'Interested' us. But then we got low grades for sticking to our books.

(Well when you have something that's supposed to contain all the answers that's usually what you do)

For being a small town the classrooms are cutely decked out. Like the Teachers decide what's in them. The back wall is lined with proffesional-looking books. In dull but varying colors.

Miss Yuhi stands up in her sleavless yellowish beige tight dress. "Class does anyone know what happened to Hiroshima?" Half the class raised their hands. I think some of the guys wern't paying attention and just staring at her. Yahiko lazily had his hand barely up. Mine was bent seeing as how all I know is it blew up.

She had one of those conducter-like sticks you only see Teachers have in old movies, it was brown like her desk and the bookcases. She points it to a brunette behind Yahiko. "Does anyone know why? Hana?"

She blinked a couple times like she didn't think she'd get picked. I don't remember if she even raised her hand. but she shakes her head in the animated sort of way. "Erm, cuz-uh... To shorten the war?"

"Very good. Now how about a debate? Was that the right way to do it? To bomb the entire city and kill thousands of civilians?"

Poor Hana blinked again. "...Um, no?" Teachers love catching their daydreaming students off guard.

"Really? but if they hadn't then millions more would have died in the upcoming planned attacks." Hana started shifting through her notes for something intelligent. Miss Yuhi smiled and continued walking inbetween the desks. "There really is no correct answer, surely the bomb was the slightly better scenario. But both of the only choices still weren't quite the right ones." She stopped next to Yahiko's desk. "So then what would have had to happen?" She asked the entire class.

"They should've made a diffrent decision earlier on." Yahiko explained, looking relaxingly 'blah' "The farther on the might've gotten a diffrent scenario with better choices. People just need to look for the truely right decisions."

"Agreed!" Hana said cheerily to save her fall. Some of the class laughed.

"Very good Yahiko, Hana." She said, walking back to her desk. "So everyone can agree to make better decisions now?"

Everyone nodded hurridly. Only a few genuine. It was the kind of promise they'd forget or go back on later. I made a mental note not to be one. Not this time.

-Later-Gym Class

"Good morning youths!" Gym Teacher, 'Might Guy' yelled at all us. " How are you feeling today?"

Scared, terrified, nausous, usual emotions during the adverage Gym class.

But this is Gym class with Guy. I don't know if Guy is his last name, first name, name the witness protection program gave him or what. All I see when I look at him is a green thing with a bad haircut, orange legwarmers and giant catapillers eating his eyebrows.

Apparently, general age doesn't matter when you're here, if you're in Highschool, you're in the same learning age group. Because 14-year-old Deidara and 18-year-old Kakuzu are both here with me. Both _sufffering_ with me...

Along with Kisame and Yahiko. Who are clenching their mouths shut to either prevent vomitting or laughing, or both. Kakuzu seems pretty impassive and Deidara just has a giant grin plastered on his face.

"As a warm-up, you all can do 50 laps around the Gym!"

Save me Lord.

-Later

"Now, Dodgeball!" Wait! I'm only on lap 38!

-Later

"Quickly! 700 jumping-jacks!"

We have 15 minutes left!

-Later

"Oh you blossoming flowers! I'm so proud to be watching over you during such growing stages of youth!"

Can't. _Breath._ Can't. _See straight._

-Later-Art Class

You'd _really_ think Art would be the one cut in half and not Gym- then again, I guess I can't argue breaks between Guy encounters.

Yahiko picks the easel next to me. On my right is Deidara who holds up his folder again that still has the 'HI KONAN' written all over it. Next to Deidara was Sasori, who'd already started painting something.

This is the class with creepy, drunkard Orochimaru Hebi. Although I can't be certain that he's drunk right now. Maybe he's just on drugs. He does always have a slurry speech. Or he's hissing, one of those two.

He walks in the door eerily on que with the bell, like usual.

He yawns, not bothering to hide how extreamly _bored_ he is with us. He lifts his head to check for us in all place. Gestures at two kids to stop talking. Picks up a note book and gives us all the 'You know I don't want to be here any more then you do' gaze.

"Today you can all just paint me pretty ladies. Realistic looking ones with as much clothing on as your raving hormones and the schoolboard will allow. Get started."

I'm not quite sure why he scares me so much. He just does. I start trying to paint my Mother on a antique couch.

Halfway through I can see how cartoony it's looking. Yahiko on my left seems to be drawing her too. In a uncreative field with confusing borders, but still prettier then mine. I look over to the artists. Fully expecting something near perfection.

Deidara's made a silloette of a cute little body, but is making a firey background first.(Just looking at it makes me sweat alittle.) Meanwhile I try to non-chalantly lean back to clearly see what Sasori's painting. Which fails when my stool almost tips back and Deidara laughs at me.

The commotion aparently called Orochimaru to us. He walks over lazily, he takes a sneaking look at me and glance at Deidara before moving on. He likely circles around the next easel and comes back around on Deidara's other side.

He stops to watch Sasori closely. But Sasori's concentration hasn't been broken once this whole time and isn't now. I try to see and I can make out what looks like a foresty-type thing. But I can't spot any outline or person.

I blink and try to stab my curiosity to death and pay attention to my own. But after a few moments I sneak a peek at Deidara to see if that'll silence it.

Deidara's put his hand down, he's scratching at a pre-exsisting hole in his brush and making it all the more deeper. Like he does it regularly..Glaring intensly at nothing. While Orochmaru's still watching Sasori.

-Later

Everyone got in a line to show-off their paintings. I waited behind with Yahiko to ask him:

"What was Deidara doing half-way through?"

He looked at me with 'took you this long to notice' on his face. "What? the part when he was killing his brush?"

"Are there other parts?"

"On diffrent days." He explained hushedly. "For a while he had a tick where he had to hold the canvas with his knees and lay on his back."

I shall call things like that, a Deidara moment. "And?"

"If Sasori gets more attention then him, from anybody but him. He starts throwing tantrums. He's gotten enough detentions so far for him to learn to take it out on the poor brush."

That was pretty humerous, and totally Deidara.

Speaking of the gold spitfire. He pushed and shoved enough to the front of the line that with God's perfect timing he showed off his right when I looked up. It was a very James-Bonds-girlfriend looking girl with short black hair walking calmly out of an inferno. I could actually swear that she goes to this school.

When Yahiko got to go up later. Mommy dearest would have loved his young, and quite tiny depiction of her.

Orochimaru liked to find something to complain about in each picture.(He complained that there wasn't a scratch on the girl walking out of the inferno. Deidara retorted that there wasn't supposed to be. Orochimaru comebacked saying she looked like a boy in a dress. Deidara replied that she always does) His complaint with Yahiko's was the back background.

The complaint with mine was that- I men for the couch to be angled, but I couldn't size the bdy to that effect, so one side of the couch was small and skinny while the rest was normal. And he just had a field day telling me how logically wrong _that_ was

Even I was annoyed when Sasori's turn was up and Orochimaru said nothing more then "Beautiful job."

-Lunch

For Gawdz sake. I didn't even see a woman in it untill I got up close to see the line of bug-sized ladies walking by... It _was_ awfully pretty though...Wait- _shutupshutupshutup._

When Yahiko'd pulled me into the Lunch room. Deidara was still arguing with Sasori in the entertainingly though. Or maybe it just seems that way because Sasori's so still and tiny and Deidara's flinging his arms around like a lunatic on menopause.

Hidan flagged us down by standing up ontop of the table and yelling "HEY HEY OVER HERE OVER HERE!"

Not quite sure why we always need to be flagged down when we're always at the same table. We get up there as Kakuzu's trying to pull Hidan down.(Very fruitlessly despite Kakuzu's size and creative attempts)

Itachi looked like he just finished noogieing Sasuke. Naruto was closer then close to the two and gobbling his Mac-n-Pizza like a wild animal.

"Naruto?" The animal looked up at me with a slightly disgusting mixture of cheese and tomatoe sauce on his face. "You're making me sick and kind of scared." He smiled annoyingly and I started getting nausous.

Kisame landed his place and Hidan finally volentarilly got off the table. He started casually talking with Itachi in that 'perfect couple' sort of way. Speaking of gay couples. Deidara's had a moodswing and is now dragging Sasori to the table by the air in the 'hyper-girlfriend' sort of way.

Deidara threw the red bundle in a seat before flopping down himself. He then started jabbering worse then Naruto. Mainly because _Naruto's_ jabbering is _about_ something most of the time. Where as I think Deidara was saying something mixed with Sasori and extinct panda's.

Oi, the group of friends I have.

Hidan starts touching something he shouldn't be touching..

"Did I drop something down there?"

"They _are_ real!"

-Later-Science Class

After I bloodied Hidan's nose and Yahiko gave him a woman's rights lecture with so many big words I think his brain melted. It was off to Science~

In here it's Sasori and Itachi, who I, in a childish moment, wanna call the 'cool crew' Because they're just both so stotic and sexy in their own diffrent ways, if people didn't hate Akatsuki, heads would be turning.

Itachi's sunglasses keep falling infront of him and I don't care if I gave up flirting, him brushing his lovely black hair around is just damned beautiful.

Sasori just annoys me. But I kind of want to pinch his cheeks after he finishes the days' pop quiz and covers his body in the giant red hoodie and dissapears in a pile of reddness. It's hard to stay made at something so chibi-like.

Mr Hatake, who could win the best Teacher award hands down. Is at the same time awfully annoying. He throws us pop quizzes so he can read some kinda pink book under is desk. It's the days inbetween his readings that he wins the award.

He doesn't _look_ or _sound_ sick. But he's always wearing that Hospital mask. Kinda reminds me of Kakuzu, I've only seen the lower side of his face when he took that bandana off his mouth to eat in the dim lighting of thee alley a few days back.

Yahiko finished his paper early on. Now he's writting on something else. He folds it and throws the paper over to me. Mr Hatake's still reading intently.

In handwritting too neat for a normal guy to muster: '_This is the part where Kakashi gives his speech'_

On que (alotta on-ques today isn't there?) Kakashi Hatake smacks his book shut and stands up. "Okay everyone, class is almost up. I won't be seeing you all untill Monday, so be good so I don't have to track you down and devour your very being. M'kay?"

A gruesomly awsome mini-speech. And you have to laugh at the few kids that seem to shiver in paranoia.

I tried to jolt down the last two questions I'd been working on. I trotted up to his desk and handed my paper in while all the country bunkins tried to dispher his comment from sarcasim and seriousness.

"If I screw something up, I'll tell you my weakness is poor swimming."

Kakashi looked up at me, "I'll keep the mini-pool inflated in preperation." I turned away from the desk to catch Yahiko and Itachi laughing. While I think Sasori was sketching a picture of me drowning or something close to that effect.

-Math Class

I got into the room. Teacher Iruka Umino was fussing over Hidan whose nose had started bleeding again(or had never stopped bleeding). This was punishment enough for the poor guy who is this close to crying over how Motherly Iruka's tending to him.

Complain, complain, complain. World, I give you a Hidan moment.

Hidan starts cussing and Iruka just waggs his finger at him.

Personally, I hate Math, I don't understand the importance of Pi, just it's tastyness. This class should be reserved for people who want to grow up to be one of the scientists that sit in a room 24-7 making sure a comet doesn't hit the worlds. Cause you know the cranky Greek gods are just going to intervine in life again and Jesus is just gonna waltz back down here and shove a big peace-sign up Zeus' ass.

At least that's how I see it. 2012 was too much Hollywood. (I did a report on Buddisim once. Maybe we'll just all get kicked into Naraka. Or better yet, maybe this IS Naraka.)

Maybe the wrolds already ended and this is just what Heaven for normal people is like. Who knows. But the apocylpse is still something bettter to think about then Math.

Iruka starts with a stern lecture on the importance of numbers. And I think he's talking about Pi. Which is making me hungry. (Now that I think of it. Between commenting on my Harem and pulverizing Hidan, did I ever eat Lunch?)

Iruka's pointing to a symbol on the board that I have no idea what means. Or what you do with the numbers and it. Or if it has anything honestly to do with numbers. They tend to talk about numbers rather little in Math.

My Mom tryed to tutor me once. I was bored, annoyed, and tired. I jotted down the answers, the realizing that I'd added everything, when one side of the paper clearly read subtract. I told Mom I hadn't payed attention and she tryed to calmly say it was okay. Then she looked over it and tiredly said. 'Well, none of them are right- but I can see where you messed up~'

Math is evil. And I'm starting to wonder if it's the reason why teenagers today have no self-esteem. You know a generation has failed when kids are ashamed of their own age group. Which I wasn't untill I noticed how much of a bitch I was... I fail.

I absently look over to Hidan. Either he's illiturate, and writting his words very carefully, or he's doodling, and has a bad headache.

Or maybe he's just right-handed and is having trouble writting with his left because of his wrist. Or it could be all three. I could see it being all three.

Yahiko's writting rather calmly, he even yawned a few times. A metal nerd, gawd he is a straight Luis. My life is a TV show.

-Later

Math is death. I didn't touch my pen once, and I finally got an assignment, which Iruka'd passed with me because I'm new and my daydreaming face might've made me look alittle retarded.

I run up behind Yahiko and tap him on the way out. "Can I copy?"

-Homeroom

Homeroom, AKA Study Hall, AKA the place where you get to deflate your brain before frying it with video games at home.

AKA AKA-tsuki playroom. Because we're all here. Isn't that quaint?

I followed Yahiko and Hidan like a puppy and kept tugging at Yahiko's notebook hanging enticingly out of his bag for my precious cheat-sheet. Hidan just wouldn't stop laughing.

I got down in my seat and tryed to grab for it some more. Failing I looked around the room trying to figure out who else I knew who might be a Mathwhiz.

Not Deidara, not Kisame- looks too jocky. Most certainly not Hidan, I'm alittle scared to ask Kakuzu... Maybe Itachi.

Before Zetsu comes in I run over to him. "Itachi, can I copy your Math paper?"

"No," Well damn,

"Why not?"

He looked up at me with the dark eyes that now that I really look at them, really do have gray pupils. "It's diffrent then yours."

"How diffrent?"

He smiled, and my legs kinda got jelly-like. "Advanced Math for Seniors diffrent." Said the 15-year-old Sophmore genius Itachi Uchiha.

I kind of gave myself a wide-eyed pout. Before carefully returning to my seat. Where I proceeded to bend over and tug on Yahiko's bookbag some more.

Zetsu Yian eventually entered in a entirely brown suit. Putting down his briefcase, removing jacket and straightening tie in a very extraordinary fashion. "Okay class, The board tells me your'e low on ideas of Literature stories?"

I could write a screenplay. 'My Life: The Musical' And it goes like 'Laladididaa, God made us change this verse because it was too cliche, then alittle horsey starting eating hay, common~~~'

It seems all the best musical numbers were written by people dying of AIDS. At least that's what I thought when Mom dragged me to see RENT and when I listened to the Beauty and the Beast commentary.

Actually, speaking of RENT, Deidara could almost- okay Konan, stop now. You are not making another gawddamned refference.

Expecially not one that reffers to Deidara as a transvestite. I should know by now, that he's just a very pretty and artistic little boy.

I wasn't paying attention, but I guess he's calling kids up to display ideas. Yahiko walked up and provided that taking a normal, everyday issue and writting a story of your own charaters dealing with it was a guaranteed A. Which Mr Yian laughed at. And I shall take that idea next time annoying Shion Same decides to throw a 'make-sure-you're-not-crazy; assignment at me. I'll write a pleasant little tidbit about Konara, the serial killer.

Deidara's idea was taking extreamly boring and simple ideas or things, or subjects. And making a detailed documentry of them. Sasori immidiantly got up and gave a lovely suggestion of writting a story about the seasons going to school together. Or elements, or Greek Gods. Which adorable little Dei-Chan started visibly fuming over.

Itachi suggested a modern parody of an old story. And Hidan got up and suggested a story about a blob named bob who wanted a nod and a polished knob.

Akame even went up and suggested a list of fashions you'd like to exsist. And droaned on about how hers will be shades of pink... I've never hated the color so much.

"Any other suggestions?" He looked at me. Yahiko outstretched his arm to push me out of my seat.

I walked up, not hating being the new girl as much as I expected to. "I'd write 'My Life, the Musical. And it's go like:"

-Later-After School

"And Kakuzu's would go: Money money money, It's so tasty, cash-cash-money my sex-y BABYYY!" Hidan sang loudly as we all exited the school building and safely scurried away from the normal people.

No one'd said anything but we all just started walking towards the Cafe. Deidara started yapping again fatally near my ear so everything was blocked out untill I had to sit at the table.

"And THEN she starts asking me where I buy my clothes and how I make my bust look so full and I'm trying to explain that I JUST walked into the wrong ROOM!" Deidara was telling the tales of his ill-fated short attention span leading him into the wrong dressing room. Eventually Bri came out of the magic curtain that led to lands untold of.

"Kookerz, we got pinched a shipment of generic ingreidiants, so you all get free fortune cookies!" She said it so randomly I had to blink a second.

"Who sent you fortune cookies?" Sasori asked, being the first one to regain composure,

"Ironicly, Canada," She explained very plainly. "... Orders?"

Everyone gave their orders, I asked for chief salad and frys this time. "Fortune cookies?"

"Bri has a habit of being extreamly random."

I blinked, well, it's random versus cliche. Up to bat, bases loaded, fashion sense: Pink.

She brought our orders out on two giant carts. Hidan was yelling loudly as usual but the only ones here were a group of girls that just kept giggling and all the cute guys at the table and- hot damn that's the girl from Deidara's picture!... Yeah she does look like a guy!

I'm snapped out of it when Yahiko throws a cookie at me. I instinctedly pop open te wrapper.

"So Genie-B. How acurate are these?" Hidan asks.

She puts on a very serious face while setting out table. "Written by the store owners Shaman Grandmother accurate!"

I break open and put the pieces in my mouth. We're all impatient cause everyone has theirs open by the time the table's set. Bri walks away just as Deidara exclaims. "Double Fortune!"

"What's it say?"

Deidara unfolds the first one. "Let go of what you love. And cling to what keeps you breathing."

"Beautiful," Sasori muses, but he looks half-asleep. "And the other one?"

Deidara opens it. "Patience is a virtue."

Mayjor ROFL moment.

Deidara nudges red. " Sori-Danna, wazzurs?" Isn't Danna the honorfic for husbands?

Deidara's husband opens his own. "Listen. Someone's trying to love you."

Kisame leans over the table to him. "Pssst, I love you."

"Okay Free Willy, what say you?" Kisame glares and flipps him off. Itachi chuckles and gets a nudge frome the big elbow. Kisame opens his. "Some secrets aren't always worth hiding."

"We already know you're gay." Hidan muses. "Mine says: CAREFUL! Your next road trip may have _deadly_ consequences!" He says, then gasping and pretends to hyperventilate.

Yahiko, whose been awfully quiet compared to the rambunctious group. Opens his almost off-handedly. "Someone special will come into your life."

He looks at it a moment before putting it away silently. "Well _that's_ gay." Hidan talks again, with his mouth hanging open. Everyone giggles.

"Itachi?" Free Willy trys.

"Rely on your friends, they can help you more then you do." He says quietly. He unfolds the paper, puts it away. And looks up at Kisame. "I need ten bucks."

Everyone laughes aloud. Hilariously. Except Deidara who's looking like the stotic one for once and I think Kakuzu's just bored.

The before mentioned miser opens his to get it out of the way. "Mine is...: You're not alone?"

"I take it back I take it back! THAT'S gay!" Hidan yells. He says before laughing and falling to his side and onto Yahiko's unwelcoming lap.

"When you say: That's so gay. Do you know what you say?" Hidan laughes louder at my terrific memory.

"Okay Konan-cheater-princess." Yiko's _combining _nicknames now? "Everyone's been forced out of theirs,"

I quickly re-open mine to read it before people try to coax me. "Strive for what you wish for before that shooting star dissapears."

-Later-Home

"ITACHIIIIII!" Naruto attacks the poor unfortunate man when he enters the door with me and Yahiko.

Jiraiya and Mom laugh at us from their spot on the couch. Sasuke's sitting on the floor playing the video game Naruto abandoned.

Itachi drags Naruto whose hanging on his leg over to the couch. Itachi leans on Sasuke. "Winning?"

"Hn," No, he's not.

Mom gets up off the couch to poke-greet me. "I don't understand this game- he's beating up the man to find out what he got for the ladies birthday I'm just confused. Why not say please?"

"Men do anything to avoid the 'P' word, Yugi." Yahiko explains.

"So it is true, you are a little lady." Yahiko smiles and closes his eyes. He walked straight into that one. Mom wants a chewtoy and the first one that calls her Yugi is it.

Naruto's attention wandered away from humping Itachi's leg and he moved to trying to pull the controller away from Sasuke. After five minutes of that, Sasuke got up just as Naruto apparantly lost interest.

I was sitting at the kitchen table with Mom talking.

"_Coughcoughcough,_"

"You okay Itachi?" Yahiko asked, seeing him and Sasuke to the door.

"I got cough drops~" Jiraiya called.

"I'm fine just something I ate." Itachi said tiredly. I looked over, Sasuke was clutching his arm.

Naruto glomped his other side. "Bye-bye Itachi~"

"Ey, Naruto." Jiraiya called Naruto for something. Yellow runt waved and then trampled off.

Mom excused me and I left the kitchen. Yahiko whispered something to Itachi I still couldn't catch.

I got next to him in time for Itachi to wave as the decended the porch. But I just kind of got struck by how tired Sasuke looked.

They both were out of range shortly. I stayed on the porch with Yahiko. "Why're you picking on Itachi?"

He kept watching the darkness. "I'm just worried, he's been coughing bad, and there's enough crap wrong with him already, y'know?"

"Have his parent's said anything?" I asked.

He watched the dark some more before turning around. "His parent's haven't said anything."

I watched him. The I looked back outside to see if he had been looking at anything.

Nothing, untill a couiple seconds later when I saw a gold wave tumbling towards the porch.

It was followed with tackling me. "Hi Ko-Chan~"

"Yes, Deidara-hurricane?"

He rustled with his bag before pulling something out. " Sori's cheat-sheet."

Glittery gold in my eyes and I snatched it up. "Oh Dei you shouldn't have." I called Hollywood style.

"Your welcome." He smiled and took a bow for me. Before turning around and racing away as fast as he'd gotten here.

Well, If this isn't all convinent?

I smirked and re-entered the house. Yahiko was at the bottom of the stairs. "Konan, I'm going to bed."

"M'kay." Him and Naruto both vanished to upstairs.

Mom exited the kitchen. "Aren't you both the sweetest couple?"

Jiraiya twisted around on the couch. "Oh-no! steriotype underground romance manga incest!" How ever he gets a hold of it, Jiraiya knows way too much about Mananime Pop culture.

-Later

It was about 3-somethin' in the morning. I take note of that remembering it's the demonic possesion hour because of all those horror movies I've watched and start wondering if I'll be possesed by some guy named Beezleblub. I hear a soft rushed knocking and I get up. I opened my door, there was Naruto in his navy PJ's rubbing his eyes with the phone in his other hand.

He sobbed a few times, and before I could ask him what was wrong he hugged me and spoke with a broken voice "Somethings not right." He stayed there crying a few moments and all I was able to register was petting his head and having my other arm around him. After a couple minutes Yahiko heard and came out. Tried to calm him down and see what was wrong. He just clung onto me and repeated the same thing.

Mom and Jiraiya woke up too, we were up the rest of the night trying to snap him out of it. I think Naruto must've whispered something to Jiraiya, cause he got worried too and made some phone calls that he didn't let anyone hear. It wasn't untill Jiraiya'd put up the phone, Naruto was passed out on the couch with Yahiko and Mom had head out for work that he'd turned on the five O'clock news.

Me and Yahiko looked up from Naruto's tear-stained face at the sound of the same newscast. 'Tonight, more information on the missing boy from Ame' And on the screen it showed a picture of Sasuke.

-**End Chapter-**

Holy crapper-snickle Batman! LoveGunner stole another plot point from the canon story!

Sasuke ran away in Confession's of a Teenage Monster too... I fail at creativity~

There's lots of refferences to other crap and other fanfics in here too. But I don't remember it all.

The next chapter is almost completely written- It's likely to have been updated along with this chapter.

Unless I get Kitten duty while writting the only scenes I haven't put . That damned animal keeps attacking my fingers. And worst of all- WAKING UP.

I TRY to keep it asleep in my sling. (AKA My Naruto headband around my neck) But then it wants to wake up. Eat, attack my fingers, eat again, and then fall asleep on me for another two hours . Not good for my posture.

This chapter- as writting it, seemed extreamly uneventful and uninteresting to me. It was kind of supposed to. Because drama has offically kicked into gear. BWHAHAHA...

Watch, I'm gonna suck at the drama XD let's call it Teenage Angst that doesn't last long. XD


	10. Reasons to Live for

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, Akatsuki, crap-crap or crappity crap crap. Anything used in this story, it's location discribtion or the current plot point in this story...

YAAAAAAAAAWN

Oh of course, I WANT to put a informational authors note, but I can't think of anything to say.

Here's something: The mayjority of this chapter was written during mine writing chapter five and six. Basicly, after Konan and Pain get home. Everything after that was written a month or more ago...

Also excuse freguent(er) typos. I have a sleeping cat on my chest right now. In the before mentioned 'Naruto headband sling'

Slightest...motion... wakes... up... eh,

Oh and- I've cause myself a few times. Tell me if I ever accidentally refer to Pain as- well, Pain. Instead of Yahiko. XD

-**Reasons to Live for-**

"It doesn't mean anything. Maybe someone just reported him missing- er. Falsely." Is what Jiraiya tried to say while re-dialing constant numbers.

I'm still confused on how Naruto telepathicly knew this- well. He didn't know it, but-

Yahiko's pacing infront of Jiraiya waiting for him to finish whatever he's doing. I'm stroking Naruto's head begging God to keep him asleep.

I turned around on the couch. I watched them both pace next to eachother. It was five minutes of tearing silence before Jiraiya's face brightened up. "Itachi? that's you?" Yahiko spun around to stare at Jiraiya who was listening intently at the few words Itachi said. "The News report today. Was it-?" Jiraiya's face fell a second. "...We'll do something Itachi, don't worry just rest up and-..." More silence. "...Okay I will..."

He put the phone back up again slowly. "What-what?" Yahiko asked frantic.

"... Itachi said he put out the call. He woke up last night and Sasuke was gone." Was the worst, grim, reply.

Shit shit shit shit shit _shit,_

-Later

Naruto was coaxed up with attempted calmness by noon. I had to leave the room with Yahiko when Jiraiya told him, but the part I was scared about was that he didn't make any noise.

I'd just seen the 12-year-old boy last night! Perfectly fine, pefectly safe. He was just fooling with Naruto like-mother-fucking-_usual._

But, don't mind me, I'm just newbie who's been here a week. For all I knew he does this monthly...

_AGHHHHHHH!_

I thought I'd DELT with my lifes teenage drama!

Calm, calm, worry about other stuff. Stop, blinding, worry with anger... Ugggh,

Jiraiya room. "Okay, we're all calm for now." He takes a deep breath. "We need grocery's."

"WHOOP-DI-FUCKIN-DO!" ...Oh gawd I said that out loud didn't I?

-Later

Yahiko's been half-carrying me like I'm a fragile doll since the outburst. Which I actually don't mind.

The 'store' is about the size of two shacks put together(I think it _is _two shacks put together) there's a corner of a very limited rent-a-movie selection. I get three horror movies cause I'm kind of in the mood to see guts flying everywhere.

Blinding worry with anger.

Naruto's- _scary_ silent. Who knew something like this could do this to someone? Then again, little yellow runt is _far_ from the adverage twerp.

Jiraiya's picking seemingly random things as fast as possible. The woman behind the counter is giving us the. 'what-the-hell' face. Like any other nromal person viewing a panicing, stoticing, moping, and a fuming.

Which is what Yahiko's doing, he's deep in thought about something. And I don't want to open my yap to ask what. Meanwhile, Jiraiya finally finishes and is at the counter.

A random guy walks in- "Jiraiya, I have a job for you." Jirai-boy looks like he just decided on suicide.

"...Yes Boss... What is is?" He moans sounding utterly defeated.

"I need you to help my sister move some boxes around, 300 in it for ya'." I twitched alittle.

".. I just needta' take my kids home."

"Take it or leave it now." Laa, la la la di, di-daaa. This is not, happening to me~~~~

Jiraiya was about to snap in about five second. And I'm waiting to see blood flying when he takes down dis mo-fo.

"I'll give em' a ride home." I turned around, the deep pit I was in vanishing in a moment of distraction. The Bartender, from the Bar... weeee~

His eyes are even more red-looking in this light. Jiraiya looks up at him. "Madara? really?"

"Yeah I'm heading back anyway." Jiraiya takes a moment, bows to him. Hands Yahiko the grocerys and runs out the door... Naruto was staring at an obviously out-of-date mail box that read 'Letters for Santa' Madara, Mr. Bartender got up next to him. "Hey, perk up, you're depressing."

Naruto kind of cocked his head without looking at him. But then he followed us out.

Did it just get really really hot all of a sudden?

-Later

Even in the car the heat was killing me, despite me being able to hear the air conditioner. I fanned myself and leaned on the window. Yahiko'd let me have the window-seat. He was in the middle between me and Naruto pondering something.

Madara stopped the car when we got to town and looked about to say something, but Naruto through the door open before the car even stopped and bolted off. Yahiko was less then seconds after him. "Thanks for the ride." I said while we both had a exausted look on our faces after watching them. He gave a silent wave with a sigh and roll of his eyes. I got out running right into Hidan and Kakuzu. Hidan had the same tired expression as Madara. "Damn, and I thought chicks were emotional."

Kakuzu jabbed him in the ribs and he whined. "You should head after them." I nodded, already worried. And ran up the hill.

It seemed like it took forever to get up the hill compared to how fast the boys climbed it. But I reached the porch and trudged through the door and inside.

The grocerys were thrown still in the bag into the fridge. Then Yahiko plopped onto the couch. I looked up at the TV. Yahiko was watching the news chewing on his fingernails. I spotted Naruto run down the steps past me and outside. The look on his face while he passed made me join Yahiko.

It was talking about Sasuke. They basicly lied about what they''d said earlier. There was no 'more information'. They had no info on where he lived or where his parents were, saying his school records were mostly blank. Mentioning Itachi and that they also couldn't find him to comment, they were talking about the serial killer on the lose who supposedly got them both. Near the end it went to on-the-site interviews outside the school with his friends.

Sakura's red tear-smothered face came up as she tried to babble about Sasuke. I grabbed the remote from Yahiko and turned the TV off. We both sat there a few minutes in silence. "I've got to do something." I mumbled.

"Yes we do." Yahiko pulled me up and out of the house.

-Akatsuki Alley

By the time Yahiko'd found a ride into town by someone who didn't believe all the rumors about his 'mischivous group' (Which ironicly ended up being Hidan's Mom) and we'd gotten to the alley. All the others were already there, excluding Itachi. Sasori had Missing papers made up, Kakuzu had a bike ready and it looked like they'd only been waiting for us.

"How we going to do this?" I asked.

Deidara spoke up, his voice was moody and bored. "Me, Hidan and Kakuzu are searching the town. We called up Zetsu Yian from homeroom and Madara from the bar. They're driveing Sasori and Yahiko up to the nearest towns. You and Kisame'll stay in the area and check the fields." He didn't mention Itachi, didn't need to.

Everybody nodded and started getting ready. Kisame pulled me out of the alley first and led me to the bike racks while he started gearing up a black motorbike. My heart pounded and he couldn't get the keys in the ignition fast enough.

-Later

"Now what?" We'd searched all the fields on the road to the town. Now we were here and Kisame parked the bike infront of the Bar. We both got off and scanned the surroundings. Nothing, like there would be.

"My bike can't go on ragged roads. We'll have to walk from here. We can start in the woods." I nodded, letting him lead we headed for the path to the clearing we'd all hung out in last Tuesday. While we passed him and Sasori's road I looked up it. Deidara looked like he was taking a break on the side, although I'd think he'd want to be in the shade right now with this weather.

We walked through the clearing in silence. Both in our own worlds. We got there and it was empty. Not a trace that'd anyone had been here since we had. We made our way out . And he said we'd go to the left of the fork and down the hill.

"It used to lead to mines and old houses. The path is deserted now. All for torists. Leads to the mountains." He mumbled, but by this point I couldn't stand the silence anymore.

"Where's Itachi?" I asked, "He's not missing too is he?"

Kisame shook his head. "He just won't leave. He's blaming himself," Kisame took a deep sigh. "after everything that's happened to them. Itachi's worried about Sasuke's mental health like Sasuke's worried about Itachi's physical health."

I took that one like a stab to my heart. "Everything? whats happened to them before? and- why can't anyone find their parents?"

Kisame took another deep sigh that he let shudder out. I'd never seen him like this before. Usually he was carefree and boyish. "... Their parents both died four years ago."

"Then who's taking care of them!"

Kisame kept looking up ahead, avoiding my pleading looks. "they are. Neither wanted to be taken to an orphanage where they might get seperated. So Itachi got together with Yahiko, they came up with the plan to hide them." I kept staring. Four years would make Yahiko twelve. Back when Yahiko was chatting with me about the others, He said that Itachi was a year younger then him. A twelve and eleven-year-old planning on avoiding the cops? That stuff didn't even happen in the city! "Yahiko hid them out somewhere. He was moved here, and he brought them with him. I guess Jiraiya understood and let them do it. Their parents died in a fire, so they were able to make everyone to believe that they'd died there too."

"But then what? how could no one notice a new eleven-year-old and seven-year-old without any parents?"

"They live in the abandoned building next to the bar. I guess they found out that Madara's their Uncle somehow." My mind stopped short for a second. I then thought more. There was a resemblance. And it explained the way Madara acted earlier with Naruto. "But they didn't want to bother him with staying with him. Yahiko got together with Sasori who made fake stamps for them. Then they found Kakuzu who broke them into the school. Forged school records for both of them. And Sasori stamped them to proof they were excepted despite being half-blank. That's actually how the group started forming."

While he told the story I could actually see in my mind these freaks I call my friends actually doing all that. So that's the orgin of Akatsuki huh? "And they've gotten away with it?"

"They're still here aren't they?" We were getting deeper into the trail. I started noticing the dark, dim and damp feel that showed almost no one came around here. Trees as far as you could see, a musty smell and the trail curved around alot. I tried to imagine it back in the old days when it was traveled and all that crap.

I pushed for more conversation, I couldn't stand worrying. "So how'd the rest of you get together?"

He smirked aliitle, probably wanted to change the immidant subject away from our task too. "Yahiko and Itachi came from the city together after both their parents died. Yahiko apparently met Sasori, who was- well, kind of in a simular situation."

"His parents are gone too?" God, I know my Dad's a jackass. But my Mom's my world, compared to the other guys I have a happy perfect family.

"They died when he was around five, that's why he's with his grandmother now. Yahiko related to him and I guess he practicly coaxed him out of a corner to help. Then he clung onto him to keep him from going back." I laughed in my head. I could just see little Sasori as the shy kid. "Kakuzu got bribed to help them. But he kept coming around afterwords. I guess he kept saying he had nothing better to do. Then I moved here, and since all the kids kept picking on me-"

"Because you're blue."

"... Because I'm _blue_," He started, play-glaring at me. "Itachi took me under his wing and brought me to Yahiko's group."

"Why are you blue?" I asked sounding annoyingly innocent.

He rolled his eyes but didn't flip me off this time. Then he started with it. "My Mother... got pregnant unexpectedly. Then she kept on her regular routine like usual. I guess she didn't eat the right stuff. When I was born I was a blue baby."

"Blue baby?" I laughed aloud on that one.

"It's a thing. Heart defect, by blood can't get enough oxygen. I screwed the Doctors warnings too. I should have been crippled or dead by this age. But my old man kept me active and I've never been diffrent then other kids." He glares at me again, "Are we happy now?" I nod. So he continues. "Hidan just plain never fit in anywhere. He started bugging Kakuzu relentlessly, eventually he ended up following him to the alley and Yahiko adopted him too."

"Cute,"

He was about to talk more but then we rounded a bend to a really- _really_ old building. It looked like it'd been burned down and investigated by bored kids. My curiosity drew me to walk over to it and Kisame followed. "It's from the mining days. Half the rumors say it was a bank, half say it was a hotel, there was this old homless guy that said it was a whore-house his sister worked at." I lost my attention span for a second and looked around. I looked up through the trees, to look how the sun was shading on it. And there was a little yellow runt on the second floor.

I scrambled alittle through the wreckage. "Naruto?" There was a metal ladder on the side. Kisame followed after me and held it still while I climbed up. "Naruto? comon what'er you doing here?"

I didn't like the look of the second-floor. There was less then half of it left. What it used to be was mostly wreckage that was mostly on the first floor now. You couldn't lay down on this without something dangling off the edge. Naruto- not helping my nervousness- was sitting on the edge with one leg waving around off it. I wasn't sure how he was being held up. He looked up with that tired look in his eyes he'd had last night after he finally stopped crieing. "Nothing..."

"Well come down from there, you'll scare me." Normally I'd be mad I was being so sisterly to this kid I'd known for a week and actually be scared. But I kept thinking that if he fell he might fall on something rusty. There was a cure for Tetnis right? I was going mad and wanted to just drag him down the latter myself.

He turned his head fully to me. "This was a hangout for me an' Sasuke." Oh god, no wonder. But now I'm paranoiding about him being suicidal. "We'd sit here all day long making up stories about what this place was. What the people in it were like. How it got like this..." He looked out at the horizon. And if the emotion in his voice wasn't so real I would think he's being melodramatic. "... I was half convinced he'd be here. He talked about leaving other times in emo moments. But I talked him out of it... I couldn't talk him out of it this time..."

"... Naruto, I-"

"I called, him. The Payphone he calls me on. I called it, I woke up in the middle of the night cause I of a feeling in my gut. He's a light sleeper, I've called him before. He always answers. I was waiting for him to pick up and yell at me for waking him up. But he never did." He was gritting his teeth. He pounded his fist on the board next to him and I screamed when it gave away. He looked down at the new hole he made like it'd already been there.

"Naruto please come over here." I tryed, I felt like crying with him. I put my hand out. I couldn't reach him unless he put his out and leaned over.

"Naruto," I heard Kisame's voice trying a non-reachable gentle tone like Yahiko would do. "Itachi... will fucking kill you if you hurt yourself right now. Take Konan's hand and get your ass down here." He order/asked. I guess blunt would work. Yes, blunt works nicely.

Naruto looked back at us. He seemed to have forgotten what he'd just been talking about but his eyes still had that hurt. Like he was blaming himself for all this. He reached his hand out and I was just barely able to entertwine my fingers in his as he crawled over slowly. When he got close enough I half-held him and led him down the latter first. I tried not to glomp and hug him once we got to the bottom. I let out a loud sigh.

"I'll go back home," He said like we'd just had a nice discussion and he agreed perfectly. I opened my eyes to see him start to walk away. And the smile on his face was faker then plastic painted gold.

Kisame just sighed with me. "He'll be like this untill we find him. Lets just find him quick before the kid starts slitting his wrists and writting poems." Kisame'd tried to turn it into a joke, but I didn't go along with it or get mad at him. We continued down the empty road in silence. Got to the end that went into the hills. But by now we had to turn back or else we'd get lost.

The way back was silent too. I didn't want to talk after seeing Naruto's face. We reached the street again. I looked up towards Jiraiya's house, Yahiko and Sasori are both on the porch. Both with their own form of dejection.

"Kisame go up there and check on them." I say, he gives me the why-the-hell face. "before Sasori starts writting poetry."

Kisame gave an evil-looking smirk. "Now that would be a _good_ sign for him." He headed up the hill, I kept moving. I was just going to sit in the bar and drown my sorrows with soda so I can stay up all night punishing myself for nothing.

I passed Kisame and Sasori's road again. I looked up and Deidara was still in the same spot as before.

I barely had time to blink before I was standing infront of him and we were staring eachother down. "What are you doing?"

He looked back up at me. Hair blowing around with even the littlest breeze. Arms holding his head up with a leave-me-alone glare he must've stolen from Sasori. "Sitting," He finally answered, not even blinking.

"Don't you have something to be doing?"

"... Nope..." If I had heels on I'd be kicking him in the face about now.

"What is _wrong_ with you?" My mouth was in a thin line. He gave me a grumpy tired look like he just realized I couldn't read his mind.

"...Hn, I'm not going to the house at the top. No one goes near it, I'm not changing that just cuz' Itachi's brother is emo." I raised my hand in reflex like I was about to hit him. But I couldn't bring it down. I felt a woman-tantrum drumming up inside of me. He turned his look away from mine, looking bored. "When I wouldn't, Kuzu' told me to stay here till' I did. And I'm not, so if you can- grab me a pillow or somethin'." I let out my breath I didn't know I was holding like a angry grunt. Biting my lip to keep from yelling, which wouldn't happen anyway because I was just speechless.

"You bastard," I choked out finally, after a few minutes of just standing there glaring at him with my hand half in the air. I must've been holding my breath again because I panted and my legs felt weak.

"Konan?"

I swirled around. I have no idea how long I must have been standing here glaring at him. But Yahiko, Sasori and Kisame were on their way up the walk.

"Deidara what the fuck are you doing?" Sasori growled at the blond. Who gave what I would probably call a modest glare back at him.

"That house is fuckin' haunted. I'm not going near it."

"Don't be ridiculous Deidara." Was Yahiko's tired-sounding answer.

I'd made my way to Yahiko's side, where I knew he could keep me from killing him. Sasori walked over and pulled Deidara up roughly again- that time it looked like it hurt. "Deidara, you are going to stop acting like a spoiled little child and _listen."_

"Burn in hell," He ripped his arm free and started to leave. But he shouldn't have passed so close to me. I stopped him and slapped him across the face.

Ow, ow, ow, focus on the burning in my hand so I don't start pulling at his hair...

After those few seconds of shock he shook it off and continued to leave. But Sasori quickly followed, and continued to insult and argue with him for as far as they kept walking.

"I- I need to go see them." Yahiko stammered. I almost was mad untill guilt started to settle itself back inside me.

Yahiko ran off after them. I blinked a couple times. Trying to decide if that really just happened or the heat is giving me visions. But then Kisame had his hand on my shoulder.

"What was his _problem?_" And there I go, blinding worry with anger again.

"I never got to the part where Deidara joined." He said grimly. More stories. Sweet, my life is one big story book selling for 450 yen in Japan with parodies in Indonisia.

"So what's that one about? His dad a president? Mother a drug-addict? Were they brother and sister to boot?"

He sighed, but had his toothy shark-smile on his face. "Deidara's Mother apparently cheated. Because Deidara was born the only blond in both familys. Both his parents refused to believe they were any less then the picture-perfect couple so they decided to disown him to their fullest extent. He's had a rough life."

More Mommy and Daddy issues. But I'm getting less mad. "That's all?"

"I didn't say how he joined." He explained. "Deidara's always been out for attention. It's his thing. When he started school the Elementry bullies didn't take so kindly to him. Expecially when Deidara outsmarted them the whole way."

"So?"

"And then. One time his luck ran out and got backed into a corner. Tossed him around like a toy untill help came." He took a large sigh like the next sentances was a terminal diagnosis. "Itachi came."

"Itachi? so then wouldn't Deidara be in debt to him?"

"Deidara's a proud kid. Hated the fact that he had to be saved let alone by the sick kid that's always got more attention then him. Deidara didn't forgive it and has had a rivalry with Itachi this whole time." Sounds like him. Yup, sounds exactly like him. "Dei's always lived for the moment, we all decided this was a good thing- his planned revenge on Itachi the hero is as long-term as he's ever gotten."

I almost smiled- why'd I smile? I've always known Akatsuki was one big dysfunctional family. Everyone has that real love-hate relationship where they won't stop arguing but can't live without eachother.

"Then, of course. Deidara took an admiration to Sasori. Sasori was attempting to tell Deidara off when Yahiko intervined and ended up dragging Deidara around with us." So they've hated eachother forever. Cute.

I rub some of the burning out of my hand and clench my eyes for a minute. Then I turn back up to Kisame. "Tell Dei I'm sorry. I'm gonna go finish his route."

He smiled and nodded. Going down the hill to where the other three went. Well, I can't say I really forgive Deidara for letting his vanity get infront of him. But he's too cheek-pinchingly cute for me to hold a grudge.

I looked up at that final house. It was cliche, set a couple yards away from the other houses. Kind of looked like the Goth Manor in the Sims games Mom used to be addicted to. It certainly lived up to the name of a haunted mansion. But there was still obviously someone living in it.

I shook the memories of the past three minutes away(damn events in my life go by fast). And trudged up the hill. And my legs start to feel the toll of walking around all day. The closer I get to the house the more gravel the ground processes, and I had to really _trudge_ up the walk.

The hill didn't lead as high as Jiraiya's driveway. But I could still get a pretty good view of the town if I looked back. The place looked smaller from this angle though.

I walked up the gray wooded porch to the door. Cute, the drapes are even cornily gothic inside. I opened the screen door and propped it on my hip to knock on the dark hard-wood door with continually cliche stained glass.

I flipped through some posters. Gawd my whole damn life just feels like a giant fucking cliche. Like it's being written by an amature author with no other ideas then to just throw the next big plot-point at me. Why can't someone else be the main character? Like Naruto. Naruto's life would make a good series. But this is the jabbering of a bored chick who has too many worries and too many-

"Hello?"

-fucking cliches in her life to be able to-... relax... "Karin?"

And here's another cliche.

"Want me to take a guess at why you're here?" She said solemly. She fixed her red glasses. She had her tattered hair in a ponytail and had a over-sized yellow sweater that probably wasn't hers and navey short-shorts.

I blinked a couple times. "Um... I'm helping find, Sasuke Uchiha... Itachi's brother."

Something with her face twitched, and the sparkling pink lipgloss she was wearing gleamed and distracted me for a moment. "Dad-" Her voice stopped like she decided not to say something else. "-... Door!"

She stepped out of the doorway and back a couple steps. I took half-a-step forward to stand right in the middle. I suddenly wanted to keep my head down- maybe there's no reason to blame Deidara for not liking this place.

"What is it and why am I supposed to be caring right now Karin-dear?" The slithery voice groaned. Looking for a real excuse.

I had to force my head up when he came down the stairs and-...

"You know my dad, Orochimaru Hebi." Yes, Orbi-chakoo drunkard bastard... is Karin's father, heheh.

He'd changed from his tie-and-dress shirt at school and had a blue T-shirt that was making him look way younger then whatever age he is. "Konan Nekohi? I don't need to guess why you're here."

Of course Teachers and Students knew about Sasuke's dissaperance. Newscrews fuckin' _flew_ to find a story this good. "I just need to ask if you've seen him. Then I can leave."

Orochimaru took a sigh and I had to look away. I dunno why the guy just freaks me out. I looked at Karin for a second but her face was blank while she looked at he floor infront of me twiddling the ends of her shirt. Orochimaru took a look at her too and then came over to me. I backed up and he closed the door behind him.

"The only way you could get Sasuke back is to prove that people want him back."

"What?"

"That's why he _left._ He thinks he's a burden to Itachi and that no one will care that he's gone. Get proof he's full of shit and you might have a chance."

"Wait, so you know where he is?" Orochimaru does?

"I know how to get to him. But it will be no use untill you have something to convince him. That boys a stubborn ass, just like his brother."

Well, I've never seen Itachi as stubborn. Then again he does have two life-threatening diseases. "Well what am I supposed to do?"

"Think of it yourself. I don't have any ideas. Sign a petition?" He was just leaning against the door. Telling me all this. And now he turns around, and re-enters his haunted house...

Shit, shit, shit, shit shit, _SHIT._

-**End Chapter-**

XD ROFL

I torture Konan, beat up Dei-Chan, give luvinz to Orochi-Kunz, and re-introduce Kar-Bear!

EVERYONE OFFICALLY HATES ME!

Sasuke's being a idiot! voila! is that not DRAMATIC?

I SUCK SO BAD!

BWHAHAHAAA!

Wanna hear something stupid?... TO BAD!

It's so bad I can't stop laughing! oh well- See ya next chapter! I happily got THIS one up early! as an apoligy for the four-month hiatus? WEEEEE!

LOTS-O-LUVS!


	11. Falling Angels

DISCLAIMER: I do not own whining Naruto, chaotic Akatsuki, the emotional Sound or anything else used in this story~

I now provide you with a chapter I have written WITHOUT a cat on me... My back however still hurts from holding it and it's 11:30 PM...

So, in other news, I've re-loaded my virtual calender, AKA The Harry Potter Remeberall system.

Next Naruto-person Birthday that I'm aware of is: Neji's Birthday, on July 3rd...

YAAAAWN,

Anyway. I actually think my sister gave me the idea for what Konan's going to do... She has a habit of saying stupid things that I turn into pure gold!... Or dented bronze, it's up to how you readers feel~

Let me warn you, I actually wrote this chapter while I was upset with Sasuke. I thought of re-writting it when I fell back in love with him (One day I wanna marry him and the next I want to punch in his head and feed his body to crocodiles) But then I thought "I may love him, but Konan's pissed at him, so she probably would be this way"

Sasuke, you drive my emotions hay-wire. You motherfucking douchbag of ultimate hawtness. So sweet and beautiful- so stupid and pyschotic...

;SLANBWSKIEH;...

Thank the TOTALLY AMAZING daggerUndrea & her sister annria2002 from deviantArt for keeping my feelings for Sasuke all-loveys most of the time. THEY ARE AWSOME WEEE~~~~

annria2002 is a awsome artist, with an amazing ANIMATED FLASH DOUJIN she's making! It'll make ur luv 4 Sasu-cakes SOAR!

And daggerUndrea, is an awsome artist, all-around amazing person, who is helping ME and NARUTO to SPREAD TO LOVE AND THE CHEESE!

I've actually noticed that my chapters seem to be getting shorter... Ahhh well... Another thing to complain about. I was re-reading the 'great hiatus chapter'. 'Family Portraits' and noticed that when it's with Deidara, the line is supposed to be "But that's when he thinks of things to live for." And I just about had a melt-down at the unnoticed typo: "But that's when he thinks of things to life for."... I'm such a perfectionist bitch XD

Weeeee~~~~ Okay, enough talk, chapter now: YAY!

-**Falling Angels**-

I kind-of scramble down the hill and up to Jiraiya's house. Mind racing, heart pounding, all-around emotions making me want to tear at a living creature untill I reach the dirt ground under them.

Stop screaming profanitys in your head. Enough, enough, _enough._

I run into Deidara on the way and have to drown out the voices in my head with screaming so that he's not the one. "What are you doing? hnm."

I hold myself a moment to make sure I don't start screaming. "...Busy," That worked, continue running past the poor confused boy behind me.

Next is Hidan, who's sitting on Jiraiya's porch. But I don't try to stop and run past him fast as lightening. He might have tryed to say something too.

I pass by Mom and Jiraiya in the living room and go up into my room. Trying to keep myself from pounding my own head in.

Slam the door. Jump onto bed. Cover myself in thick, princessy covers. Shut out the world and _scream_ into pillow.

I might've dozed off. But I open my eyes relatively calm, Yahiko in my room and the lighting relatively dim.

I honestly feel like going to/back to sleep. But Yahiko's by my side looking genuinly worried, and him being genuinly anything is pretty rare... Why do I keep fucking talking like that if I've been here a week?

Regardless. I shut one eye in preperation and talk. "What?"

"Are you alright?" Sounding genuinly worried too.

I think for a second. Time has definitley passed. "I think I know where Sasuke is."

He shifts for a quick moment and gets closer. "Where?"

"I don't really _know_, but I think I know how to get him back."

He's inching closer, whispering quieter, looking worried-er... "How?"

That's what I've been trying to dream up, genius man.

-Next Day

It's late in the morning. But I don't think Yahiko let anyone wake me up. I could've swore I turned over and he was still in my room. But if he was he isn't now.

I don't really bother to change my clothes. I try to fix my hair. But I just never know what to do with it. It just sits there, blue, flat. Oh my gawd I'm complaining about my hair at a time like this.

I trot down the stairs, I seem to enjoy trotting. Mom's here, might be her day off, or something. She's sitting at the coffee table alone in the room. I walk over and sit next to her.

"Well somebodies awake." She cooes, I probably look like shit. "Want anything?"

"No." Not unless you have a rewind button, I wouldn't be too upset with Adam Sandlers Universal Remote right now. I look at what she's doing, she has her old guitar on the table. She hasn't played in forever, she's decorating it by glueing carefully cut and placed paper pieces. The guitars black with purple borders, white paper is acting as stems while petals at the tips are mint green paper. She has gold strings on the side to put on after she laminates it.

I pick through the scraps of white and find a undamaged whole piece. "Fold something," She says. "You used to love origami, I don't know what drew you away from it."

I couldn't tell you what drew me away from it. I'd get grounded. But I still remember how to make the pretty cranes I gave you every year. I used to make letters, and boxes, and coasters for Dad.

Then my 'friends' all complained that they ripped and tore too easily. They wanted something fancy from the store, I bought with the money you probably knew I pinched from your wallet.

But I'm not like that any more am I?

I'm not quite sure what to make, I'd make a thousand cranes for luck but that can take all day. Something as a good-luck shortcut for now. I try to remember what I could make.

I remember something I could never figure out how to make. But I'd thought about it once long after I'd stopped making things, and of course immidiantly figured it out.

I bent little edges carfully, flicked at the for effect. Fold, unfold, so many sex jokes for this. Wedge this in that and backwards.

"Honey," Took me a while...

Mom's finished her masterpiece, I've finally noticed the clock reading that it's two in the afternoon now. Mom's done up her guitar herself. Everythings finished. I shook myself out of it yet again. I ask her. "Why're the strings gold?" They had been expensive, but those are the only ones she'd buy.

She played a few notes. "They look like your eyes." A few breaths. I threaded the middle, and tied the paper flower up in my hair.

Here's an idea.

-Later

"Konan?" Yahiko said, he was in pajama's, tired-looking, yawning. The-_hell?_

"Were you asleep?"

He blinked a few times. "...Trying. To be honest,"

I twitched alittle, "... Do you really sleep in all that metal?"

He fingers a snakebite. "...Kind of."

I roll my eyes and shove myself into the room. I plop down on his bed. He pulls his beanbag over infront of me and plops down as well. "What is it?"

"I dreamed up how." He blinks again, adorabley confused. I held up the clipboard Mommy dug up for me. "Sign my petition?"

He blinked and looked at my 'People who want Sasuke back' paper. Smiled, and grabbed a pen.

Next~

"Naruto," He pulled the door open with surprising speed. His face was relatively stotic-for-Naruto. His eyes asked me. "Can you do something for me? one thing?" He nodded, not talking. "Sign here, at the top." I handed the board to him. Covering most of it including the title.

-Later

After getting Jiraiya and Mom's. I trotted down the driveway and straight into the Bar. I tackled a stool and sat at the bar. "Sign please,"

Madara looked at me and then down at it. Grunting after he read it aloud. "How'll this work?"

"A theory." Madara pulled a pen from under the counter and signed Madara Uchiha. The next one was Anko Miterashi. Tsume Inuzuka, Hana Inuzuka, a paw print from Kuromaru Inuzuka.

Orochimaru Hebi, who grinned quite creepily from the seat next to me. "Well good luck with _that_ idiotic theory." He mused. Karin came out of the bathroom, came over and wrote her name with a giant pink pen.

I left the Bar for the next far-away location. And Yahiko was waiting for me, leaning against Zetsu's car.

"You woke up?"

"Can't really let you go on your first noble crusade on your own." He said. "A Princess needs a pumpkin."

-Later-At The School.

"And that's how The Little Mermaid was _supposed_ to end." Was the end of Zetsu's final words before stopping the car in the school parking lot. He opens the door for me as I step out.

He signed his name with a thick marker saying he couldn't wait for Sasuke to graduate into his class. He's being too nice to be true. Yahiko appers behind him. "All the guys are here most the time." He gestured towards the school and I know he was reffering to the alley.

"Good luck." Zetsu called before watching us off and getting back in his car.

I looked up at the building like I should've when I'd first got here. But for some reason the lump in my throat has only arrived now. On a Saturday, because I just really don't want to be near here.

There's honestly no one outside, almost spooky. I know the rest of Akatsuki are just beyond the next wall, but I have to cling to Yahiko's jacket to remind myself to keep moving.

We arrive at the stronghold that is Akatsuki Alley. Everyone's here, excluding Itachi. They all seem to be moping. We did everything possible yesterday, now is just the waiting. But I know how to make the waiting shorter.

"Everybody. Konan has a plan, she wants you to sign this board." He calls out, his voice making the sentance sound out-of-character. "Just humor her at least." Cute, he's trying to act tough for his bros' too.

Cocking his head alittle, Sasori stood up and walked over to look at it. "Cute, what'll it do? You gonna get yourself on the news with it and act like it was done out of sympathy?" If little-red-ridinghood doesn't shut the hell up he'll be the next victim of my bitchslap.

"You heard the man. Humor me." I tried a glare which either worked, or Sasori's too lazy for comebacks today. Because he almost immidiantly took his chunk of charcoal he was using and scribbled his name in way-too-pretty cursive.

I flickered my sight at Deidara, but I don't think I've ever seen him more expressionless. He almost looks hurt actually.

Hidan jogged over to us quickly followed by Kisame. Who both rather sloppily wrote their names with the pen Yahiko had to supply. Kakuzu was slower to the circle but at least supplied his own pen and wrote neatly. I kind of, well, _really_ did not want to go over to Deidara for his turn.

But then Yahiko gave me the go-ahead look. I looked at Deidara again, virtually silent. I walked over to him very unsteadily. "Deidara? please?" He took a sharp breath, like he was in pain or something.

I wasn't in the least bit surprised when he just got up and left. I turned on my heel fast enough to watch Sasori yell and go after him. But it didn't matter much now.

I sat on the turned-over-recycle-bin seat he'd just been sitting on himself. I looked down at the paper. It wasn't _pathetic,_ but it wasn't very full at all. Maybe ten people but I'm too scared to count.

Well, it's just day one. I can't really expect everyone in town to flock to me. Maybe I should put up flyers advertising it's exsistance. Maybe forge a few signatures, I'm pretty good and doing that. I forged numerous love notes to girls I hated in Middleschool. Got them all into one big catfight because they all thought they were waiting for the same guy.

Maybe Naruto knows some more friends that'll sign. But at the same time I can't bring myself to even let him know I'm doing this, or, well. Say Sasuke's name at all around him. It just scares me to pieces, who knew the yellow runt was so fragile? I still can't get his voice out of my head.

Which, worrying about this does _not_ help when Kisame comes over to talk to me next. "I hope you don't hate Dei for-"

"No, really... It's just, I'm kind of... well, sad I guess. This is something that has to be done but I'm not sure how to go about it."

Kisame didn't really look at me after I said that. Even though he's usually the one who always keeps eye-contact. "It really _does_ need to be done."

"What's wrong?"

Kisame took a deep sigh that I really didn't like. "Itachi won't talk to anyone. He won't even let anyone inside. He won't eat, sleep. It's scaring the hell outta me." Well, great, just, great.

There has to be something I can do. Anything. Maybe Yahiko knows Sakura's address. But _something_ has to happen or else I'm gonna drop kick some poor idiot's ass.

-Later

"He'll pop up eventually honey," Mom whispered after I'd done a few rounds around the area and come home. Two pages of names, most of the names were written extra large and took up space.

I feel, completely, draaaained.

Yahiko came down, apparently Sakura lives a whiles away, so no hope of getting to her any time before Monday, which my then Itachi could've starved himself to death. Which won't be a very good welcoming if I can really snag Sasuke.

"I asked Naruto. Sakura and him are the only ones Sasuke ever talked to." Great, I'm looking high and low for an _anti-social._

I rolled my eyes. "I'm going to bed, okay? I can't stand any more." But I also wanted to leave because the TV News was talking about a serial killer on the loose again.

I trampled up the steps and into my room. Trying really hard not to slam my door. I jumped on my bed and started pouting rather dramaticly.

I swear, I didn't fall asleep sitting up. I just got lost in my tiredness for a extended amount of time... yeah, that's it.

I was woken up quite a whiles later. Something throwing rock at my window. Well, someone I guess. I peek out.

No, it's a thing. A golden, rather loud, and annoying thing. Named Deidara. "Psssst!" He whispers.

"What?" I try as quiet but audible as possible.

"Common down!" I roll my eyes again. Ugh.

But, none the less I turn around to sneak out. I grab the board hoping that whatever he's gonna do, it'll pass soon enough for me to force him to sign.

I sneak out quietly as possible, which, apparently, sometime after midnight the stairs become extreamly squeeky. Hoping anyone awake won't hear the door open and close, I reach the bottom. Lunge for the door handle and slip outside as sneaky as possible.

"Hi Konan!"

I have to cover my mouth to keep from screaming. Deidara, the blond little bastard. Is standing rather cockily close to me. Like he doesn't think I'm mad at him. "What do you want?"

His face does a dramatic change to an annoyed glare. He scoffs and rolls his eyes. "Listen, it's not like I _wanted_ to or anything."

"Anything _what?_"

He crosses his arms and starts looking enjoyingly uncomfortable. " I was just talking to my sister about the- er. Current issue of the week." He looked like he was pouting now. "...She... _she,_ wanted to help."

I blink a couple times. I look behind Deidara, waving rather excitedly is the girl that he's painted for Art Class.

-Later

"Where are you taking me?" I ask, getting extreamly paranoid now.

We went to the 'rich people hill'. And stopped at a big, white house that was across from the ones Yahiko had explained were Sasori and Kisame's. Although I have no idea who could be here.

Kurotsuchi, Deidara's rather giddy and sweet younger sister, was currently dragging me towards it while her loving big brother walked slowly ten feet behind us.

"Something that'll help with your plan~" However that didn't really answer my question. I kept my bitching yap shut while she knocked on the purple double-doors.

It looks like a Victorian Mansion or something. Or even white enough to be a Church. There's a bunch of girls bikes parked outside in the front lawn, on a tarp like someone didn't want the grass getting indented... The door opened and I had to stop looking at the house. I regonize the girl answering as the brunette that'd sat with Sakura's group.

Kurotsuchi perked up. "Hinata-Chan~ Konan's making a petition about Sasuke. Can everyone sign?"

Hinata blinked a second. "Um, sure. Of course, I-I'll go tell them."

Kurotsuchi grabbed my wrist and pulled me inside, barely going slow enough to stay behind fidgetting Hinata. We walked through the almost holy hallways untill we reached the giant living room.

The giant livng room that was currently holding a sleepover of monsterous proportions. A depressed-looking Sakura included. And my Angels have repaid me.

"Um, g-girls. Konan Nekohi has a petition about Sasuke-Kun, and she was wondering i-"

"SASUKE!"

I was tackled by a mob of giggling middleschoolers. Well, apparently Sasuke was making up for all the fangirling everyone was too scared to give to Itachi.

My new signatures being: Sakura Haruno(Sasuke I want U back!) Ino Yamanaka(I luv U!) Tenten Akira, Hinata Hyuga, Temari Sabaku, Heather Sabako, Hanabi Hyuga, Moegi Toketsu, Kin Tsuchi, Tayuya Muzika, Shioh Narako, Kurotsuchi Sureiyunomi herself, teacher Kurenai Yuhi and Mei Terumi who were supervising... Hinata's cousin Neji Hyuga...

I'm just alittle dizzy at the moment.

"Thanks! Have fun~!" Kurotsuchi waved. All the girls cheered from a window as I took a deep breath... Well that was a motherfucking miracle... I shake my head. Okay, maybe I'm still dreaming. That's it, this is all a dream, yes, yes... I'm being dragged by Kurotsuchi again. "Well? How's it going now?"

I blinked again... Don't let this be a dream. "...Um, as much as I think I can get." Maybe I could see how this goes. I could always go out and get more. I looked over, Deidara was sitting on a rock a couple feet away the whole time. I tried a walk over to him. And held the board infront of his face. "Your turn."

Kurotsuchi laughed, Deidara glared at it for a moment and then took the board. He grabbed a pen from his bag, and signed his name.

THIS is a motherfucking DREAM.

He handed it back to me silently. I looked at it, 'Deidara Sureiyunomi' with a little doodle wearing a top hat under it saying 'we want u'

Kurotsuchi bid me goodbye and ran off with Deidara into the night. I twitched alittle... Well, this is nothing less then perfect.

The gravel was hurting my feet and I was starting to get a headache after all the high-pitched screaming. I turned around and started towards Orochimaru's Haunted House.

I took a deep breath. I actually don't want to look at Orochimaru's face again. And I'm painfully aware that the commotion of mine running up the creaking steps alerted my presense. So I can't just turn around and hope Itachi'll live till' tomarrow.

Tomarrow, in the _morning. _where everything isn't eerily creepy and demented-looking. I've never been scared of the dark before this...

Or scared of Art Teachers... but everyone has a irrational fear right? I'm scared of clowns too... Ehhh... Maybe tomar-

-oh gawd he just opened the door. "Yes?"

I blinked, he looks creepier with all the light behind him. Like the Devil's savior or something. "... Is this enough?" I handed it to him, bowing my head and outstreching my arms as far from my body as possible.

He took it, I looked up through my bangs while he looked at it and his eyes widened alittle. "...Wait, this is seven pages."

"...Well, alot of people wrote really big, and the paper is pretty small, but it's the first thing I could find, and-"

He wacked my head with the board, and I was vaquely reminded of Proffessor Snape from the Harry Potter movies. Then I realized I was still bowing to him and slowly tried to rise up. "...I'll see if..." He looked up like he was thinking, then he slammed the door in my face.

Deep breath. Of course Sasuke's alive, of course Orochimaru wasn't lying when he said where he was- unless he's calling his kidnappers right now- or the serial killer that took him, or- er. Maybe Sasuke's in the forest and Orochimaru knows the general location or maybe-... wait, maybe-

The door opens. "He was in your _house?"_ I yelled way too loud for my personal safety. "You just said you knew how to get to him!"

"Well of course I know how to get to my own guest room." He explained completely plainly.

There was little Sasuke. Looking so tiny and depressing by Orochimaru's side. Perfectly fine, perfectly safe, perfectly fucking on my death list.

Orochimaru looked down at him. "Go on now. You said you would." Orochimaru said way too gently for him to deserve. Sasuke walked slowly to my side, silently. Orochimaru nodded to us before closing his door, then I finally twirled to glare at Sasuke.

"You're a fucking douchbag you know that?" He didn't look up at me. "Your brother was worried sick. I haven't seen him in three days. He won't talk to anyone, do you know what you _did_?"

"He could've just gotten over it." He mumbled under his breath and I swear I'm about to bend this boy over my knee.

"What about your friends?" His lowered his head down farther. "Naruto's been a _zombie_ and Sakura-..." I looked at him more. His face and body was obviously screaming guilt but if this kid is enough of an idiot to just throw everything away like that I don't know _what_ goes on in his head. I was ready to just screech and stomp away from him. But that would be very counter-productive. My name is on his list anyways. "Comon."

I snatched his wrist like a pissed-off Mom and led him off the porch and down the hill.

The walk seems to take forever and all I can think of are things to yell at this kid. But I put my mind to comming up with more things to say instead of saying any of them. After fucking _ages_ we're at the bottom of the hill. And I hang a right.

"Konan?"

"_What?"_

"My fingers are getting numb." He informs me like I'm not five years older and half a foot taller then him.

Nonetheless I let go of his wrist that he then starts shaking it like he doesn't know how pissed at him I am. I look up, according to Kisame this is supposed to be where they live now. The big, gray, square abandoned building next to the bar that has broken doors and boarded up windows. Not where you'd think someone like Itachi and a spoiled princess like Sasuke might live.

And- perfection. Itachi has finally appered in one of the doorways. He doesn't look _as_ bad as I was going to guess. His hair is no more unmanagable then usual, he has a pair of black sunglasses trying to hold it back. He's wearing a clean Memorial shirt. Wow, I was expecting rags and a soggy tissue in his hand.

I look at Sasuke in the corner of my eye. This has to be real true-to-word guilt now. Itachi just has to take a few steps forward before Sasuke runs over to him.

Sasuke gets buried in Itachi's sleeves and the latter looks up at me. "Thank you,"

I can smile now. Nothing else has happened. Just smile, and walk away. I nod and turn around.

Gawd-damn _fucketh_ this is so cliche...

But then a little yellow flash runs past my eye with lightening speed. I turn around and Naruto's trying to kill Sasuke. And he's spitting enough words at Sasuke that I think even Jiraiya might ground him if he could hear.

He's shaking him and Sasuke rapidly and Itachi just starts laughing.

Well, cliches are fine every once and a while...

-**End Chapter**-

Ahhhh, there's that...

And we had Konan using the polite version of everything that's wrong with Sasuke... I actually wasn't sure about all the crap Konan was thinking about Sasuke- because I'm CURRENTLY in total luvvies with Sasu-cakes after Chapter 500 reveled- NEWBORN SASUKE! KYAAAA! SO TINY AND CUTE! WIF DAT LITTLE TUFF OF BLACK HAIR AND CHUBBIE FACE OMFGOSHEZ!...

I actually ment for Konan to get her paper flower two chapters before this, during 'Good Fortunes'. But I completely forgot XD

This was so bad XD I suck at drama~

Me and my sister seemed to lose our writers block at the same time- because once _I _started writting something, she kicked me off the computer to write in HER story. (Which is actually a collaberation of me and her. It's Akatsuki VS Twilight, She writes the Twitard parts and I write Akatsuki-tardness... And it's not that _I_ helped her, but SASUKE wrote a suggestion for the next chapter and left it in her files...)

Anyway, this is where the big crap that we care about begins to happen. Next chapter should be better... Am I losing my sense of detail? I was re-reading the earlier chapters and I was like 'Wow this ROCKS, and the chapter I just wrote is CRAP.' ... Or maybe it's just my paranoia, and I'm not very good with scene-changes. But, Konan's met everyone, so maybe she WOULD stop detailing everything around her... ANYWAY...

This is the part where SasoDei fans start to hate me...


	12. True Beauty

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else used in this story.

YAAAAAAWN.

Okay, the up-coming drama is actually the crap that first gave me the idea of this stories plot. But you won't get to SEE the first ever scene I dreamed up. Because it calls for leaving Konan's POV. And I don't want to do that at this point.

But yeah, anyone read the big 500 Naruto chapter? (It's funny, this week, Naruto hit 500 chapters, Bleach hit 410, and One Piece hit 590 XD)

One Piece always has had a special place in my heart~ I can't wait that it's about to hit 600. And Naruto- OHHHH one of the best Naruto chapters in AGES!

Madara, I have to say he had the BEST LINE no- the BEST, MOST BADASS LINE EVER IN NARUTO! "Minato, step away from the Jinchuriki, or your son will die at the ripe old age of one minute." HOLYFUCKTH!

Madara, you're the cause of all this chaos in the Narutoverse, but DAMN you are one of THE BEST VILLIANS EVER!

...What? I'm okay with it cause Naruto lives... I wonder what happens next though?

Anyway, U GUYS SHOULD REMEMBER! Tobi's arriving soon. This is-... Chapiter 12. So Tobi will be appering IN THE NEXT CHAPTER! WOOO!

AND IT WON'T BE DELAYED LIKE WITH WHAT HAPPENED TO KARIN! I PROMISE!

I'm actually proud to say that this chapter holds the first time skip. So everything isn't happening all-at-once-all-in-a-row. So about a week has passed,

**-True Beauty-**

Yawn, it's been a couple weeks. So tired.

I swear to G-A-W-D. I can _not_ handle late-nights with the Akatsuki. Hidan and Deidara, they just keep _going and going and going._ They should be in a batteries commercial.

Sasori, ugh, receiving a damned _sentance_ from him is exausting. And Kakuzu uses such big words. I can't even spell them.

I find myself most nights clinging to Kisame's waste, trying to get pulled away. Itachi's smooth voice is good for something too, it eases the worst of headaches.

And if I stick to Kisame long enough he's bound to drop me on something extreamly comfy. Once it happened to be Hidan's bed. I woke up after the unannounced sleep-over to his Mom and Sister-or-whatever hyperventilating and his Dad trying to be hip and ask if we 'wuz goin' steady dawgz'... Hidan's bed _is_ awsomely soft though.

We did a few of those concerts, I still refuse to sing. Well, I kinda stood in the background a mouthed some words to 'Hey Mama' as an opening act. But... yeaaaah.

We did one last night too. But it ended at 8pm. So there was still plenty of time to make me sleep deprived. We were literally THIS CLOSE to walking back to the town untill Sasori got a call from Granmummy, where him and Dei got to wait around for her for some un-specified-to-me reason. Itachi and Kisame volenteered to stay and clean up the concert space. Hidan and Kakuzu ditched us for Hidan's Moms mini-van. And me and Yahiko got to walk home alone... Which was mind-numbingly boring.

_Yahiko_ is mind-numbingly boring. I swear, _swear,_ he has de-tachable vocal cords that retract themselves into his tongue at random intervals. Untill someone starts doing something stupid or dangerous. Then he starts yelling like a banshee.

Well, banshee's scream. But I swear I can feel the fear Yahiko's voice throws at Hidan and Deidara after they screw something up. He even got to use it on Sasori once that I saw. Poor little chibi-man just stood still and looked at the ground like a lectured baby. I wanted to hug him so bad~

Besides all that- when we finally reached town. Hidan and Kakuzu popped out of nowhere. Hidan wanted to do something. Kakuzu wanted to drag Hidan home, I wanted to go to sleep. And Yahiko wanted to follow Hidan so he doesn't kill himself... He has a thing for almost killing himself, he thinks he's immortal or something.

So, because Yahiko is the leader- or the hunky, metal-loving, carrot-top reincarnation of Simon Seyz. We end up chasing Hidan around town untill three in the morning...

We actually passed by Kagura's group smoking what-wasn't-cigerettes whilst doing so. I made sure to step on and crush everything that was in Akame's purse. Yahiko lectured me for that. He is soft. Toooo soft.

...Okay, he's the farthest thing from soft, but he does have a obsession with equality and empathy... And earrings, the three 'E's. L.O.L.

Finally arriving home. Yahiko pulled me up the stairs while Jiraiya laughed at us. Apparently, he was on the porch watching us chase the silver streak of light that was Hidan. And was proud to say he caught it on camera.

Hidan's slower then a turtle and lazier then a sloth. But when he's bored and wants to do something, he's pretty good at avaiding our tackles.

So at this point, I don't really _care_ what day it is or know what time it is. But I do know a big yellow thing is jumping on my bed.

"Konan-Chaaaaan~" Naruto calls. "Wakey-wakey!"

Sometimes he sleeps untill we drag him onto the bus and other times he's up at the crack of dawn screaming everybody awake. I open my eyes and attempt to focus on something. The light from my window is pretty dim. But it might just be cloudy. Naruto's fully dressed, and shaking my mattress- currently screaming 'earthquake'... This is not good for my- or _his_ health.

I drag myself into a sitting position. He jumps up and kinda half-hugs me or something. Maybe just taking a grab and my enormous boobies... Oh gawd I didn't just say that. That's what Jiraiya called them when he saw me walk out of the bathroom in my towel... I'll never do _that _again...

Deidara called them that too during a unforunate Gym class where I was wearing with one of my lesser functional sports bras. With earned him detention and a fat lip... From. er, Yahiko. He's so active on womens rights.

Stop thinking about boobies. Think about the annoying squirt on the bed yappering on about hearing fireworks last night... Now he's talking about breakfast prefferances- okay Naruto, beef ramen and anko paste is _not _a healthy breakfast.

"What time is it?" I say groggily. Because in all the yappering and drowziness I've forgotten the location of my clock.

Naruto blinks, and if he had cat ears they would have twitched. Then he starts again. "Uhhhh, 7-O-Clock-O."

Sleep. Sleeeeep is what I need.

Naruto pulls my hands and drags me out of the bed. I straighten my nightshirt- after Naruto became my infreguent alarm clock. Yahiko gave me every over-sized shirt he has and he honestly did in fact make all my less-then-apporpriate nightgowns dissapear.

Speaking of the Baka-for-Brains. Naruto's dragged me to his door and opened it. Because I seem to need to be present during the great 'waking of the beast'

Naruto jaggered the thing awake. This time starting with the earthquake and finishing with the jumping. Yahiko just started into a sitting position which turned into a hunched-over sleeping position, as this time Naruto had to glomp his back and less-then-politely-then-with-me pull him out of bed. But the Yahiko put extra weight onto the poor yellow thing and landed on him.

Naruto made one of those yells that you're never really sure is human. I used it as a caffine dose to wake me up. Yahiko rolled off him and then sat cross-legged on his floor. "Morning."

"Good morning." I replied as Naruto tried to re-inflate his lungs.

-Later

Naruto's been renting musical's from the grocery store again. "I can't believe I haven't _killed myself _here with wigs-mcgee and a furry elf- something about wig-wig-wig-and-please don't touch me with your alien hands~"

I drowned out the stuttered forgotten lyrics and tried to gulp my coffee and chew my pancakes. Yeah, pancakes. Made by Jiraiya. So one side is burnt and the other' un-cooked...

Yahiko seems rather used to it all. He's only plugging the ear closest to Naruto and has crafted a creative way to down the strange, creepy food.

"LET IT OUT- YAHIKOOOO!" Naruto continued to sing. Yahiko made a 'wha' sound and Naruto started cheering.

I tried to douse my plate with butter and syrup. Yahiko poked my arm. "That just makes it worse."

I stared at the food that then made a bubble. I then stabbed it dead with my fork and started eating as fast as possible.

-Later

"SAAAAA-SUUUUUU-KEEEEEE!" Ah, emo-mc-princess-pants. I don't have to deal with Naruto anymore.

Naruto comically took the distaint-minded Sasuke to the ground. Itachi stepped over the squabbling lovers and joined us. Followed by his boy-toy Kisame... What? shuddup, I'm not a faghag, it's a joke... I think.

"Morning," Itachi mused while Kisame waved with that grin full of teeth that could bite my face off.

"What's on the agenda today?" Kisame asked.

Yahiko cocked his head in thought. I wonder if he ever gets tired of them always asking him this. "...I dunno."

Kisame yawns. "That's a boring game."

"On the countrary, Sasuke loves the 'I dunno' game." Everyone gave a chuckle before it was time to scramble onto the bus.

We got on the left bus with Itachi and Kisame. Hidan and Kakuzu were here too. Hidan had a bandage on the right of his face probably from when Kakuzu finally caught him last night. He was pressed up against the window looking for Deidara on the other bus to make faces to.

But the bus started pulling out and Kakuzu tugged him down back into the seat as he started whinning. I rested my head on the back of the seat to wait out the next fifteen minutes with hopeful silence.

I brought my head back up when we got there. The sun was bright with the essance of a nice day. I'd blocked so much out the sudden re-listening hurt my ears. I followed Yahiko. (as usual, I'm such a cronie, maybe no better then Kisame.) I'm not quite sure I know where all my classes are, after a while I just followed Yahiko's back to all the classes.

We sat down in History. Mrs Yuhi. (Yup, she's gettin' married. To Asuma Sarutobi from Shop ta' boot) I listened to her basicly sing all the crap we were gonna do today. I swear she makes History entertaining. Why can't all the teachers be so cheerful and get the students excited like this? Oh, right, because 75% of the human population sucks donkey butt.

She was talking about the Declaration of Independance now. And overing up things that could be inproved or haven't been practiced very well in it. Yahiko always has close to brilliant comments to make. I don't even have to take notes, because she just makes you want to listen to everything that's being said.

I raised my hand a view times. It's nice to have a teacher smile at you every time you speak. And Kurenai will smile through everything. (Although, Yahiko assures me that Hidan and Kisame take this class together later in the day. And that Kurenai Yuhi can infact scream at a student through an entire class.)

I'm still in love with and vaguely jealous of her beauty though.

Later however, in Gym, all I could do was yawn and stare freightend at Coach Guy. He was giving a youth speech. So we wern't being slowly killed today, just having our brains turned to liquid.

I looked around and I noticed the thing just as Kisame mouthed the words 'where's Dei?'

He wasn't in the room at all. But there was one time when Deidara got a detention and missed classes before school even started. But it was his fault for testing out his makeshift-bomb science project on the Principal's car... While she was getting out of it.

I stretched and Guy apparently took that as a sign that I was very interested in his teaching and eager to continue. So he volenteered _me_ to climb the rope to the high ceiling and show everyone my 'ideal youth'.

I fell half-way up and Yahiko, Kisame and Kakuzu had to make a human pile so I didn't die...

-Art Class

The Nurse said that no, my back isn't broken. But I'm still in unbearable pain. Ow, ow, ow, ow.

I think Mr. Might Guy might be mighty rich. He could be bribing the Principal to let him do whatever he wants to the students. And one rumor I can't help but hear is that the Principal has a mountain of gambling debts.

Anyway, Orochimaru Hebi isn't exactly the best teacher with the best of class-teching style for me to relax in. Hopefully he'll have us draw snakes again and I can just make a squiggily line and pass it off as a Pacasoo-hodini-whatever... I didn't just say hodini...

Orochimaru entered the room only seconds after the bell rang. He's always acting like he was doing something and that being here is disrupting his schedule. I dunno, I'm really tired though. "Children, draw a water hole surrounded by animals. _Try_ and make sure that you don't put the Lions drinking calmly right next to Gazelles. Okay?"

So now Sasori is going to have the Lions next to the Gazelles, he breaks the 'rules' almost everytime. And Orochimaru doesn't open his mouth an inch about it.

I yawn, and when I open my eyes again Orochimaru's walking towards me- ohcrap ohcrap ohcrap ohcrap whatdididonow?

He gets here but he hardly glances at me. He looks at the two empty seats next to me... wait... Where _is_ Sasori?

And Deidara to boot. They're both absent. I'm not sure Sasori would let Deidara drag him to a detention with him, but-... But I dunno what else. "Alright, anyone have any idea where Akasuna is?" He calls, not mentioning Deidara's name, I think the only one in this entire class he cares about is Sasori. If it was only Deidara absent then he likely wouldn't have said anything.

I look around the room, everyone's shrugging. Orochimaru returns to his desk groaning.

"A tardy for Surei," It's not Dei's full last name. But he seems too lazy to call that mouthfull, he doesn't say anything about Sasori though. I twitch alittle. What'd that little runt do to get so much protection? Did he survive the spell from he-who-should-not-be-named?

"That's weird," I hear Yahiko speak next to me. He look over to him. "Deidara and Sasori wouldn't miss _Art_ if Nazi's were attacking the school."

"Maybe they got detentions?" I tried, maybe the experianced Yi'ko has an answer.

But alas, he shook his head. "Deidara got a detention through Art _once. _He was getting chased by half the teaching staff before running in here and locking the door. As for Sasori, he hasn't gotten in _trouble_ at all since he was six."

I look around the room again, almost half-expecting the both of them to walk through the door, just being late. But after a while, they just never arrived. And I looked back at my untouched canvas...

"Miss Nekohi..." Ulp.

-Lunch

Okay, now I'm just getting kind of pissed off.

"You mean they really wern't there?" Itachi asked curiously. "Then where could they be?"

Our li'l 'artists' hadn't arrived at lunch. I watched as Naruto as Sasuke were apparently starting their food fight before even getting out of the lunch line. Yahiko has a habit of telling me to sit down and then returning with a full tray for me. I have theories he thinks I'm anorexic, but then again I _am_ 99 pounds, and 30 pounds of that is in my boobs. So maybe I am extreamly unhealthy. At least I have a normal amount of blood in my veins and can see straight. Unlike Itachi.

Speaking of the guy who can't control his pretty long hair, I think what must of been a thank you- Itachi almost begged Deidara to decorate his cast that he still had from the magically falling poll incident. But looking at the patterns and decorations on the cast that's been signed by all of us is just making me more worried.

Hidan looked half-asleep, probably the effects of running around crazy all night. "Maybe Principal Senju just finally locked Dei in a closet to keep him from blowing up her stuff."

"And what do you suppose is up with Sasori then Hidan?" Kakuzu growled, he always seems so damned annoyed.

Hidan thought about that for a moment before shrugging. "Jerking off?"

I roll my eyes put my arms on the table. I don't think these guys jerk off, they all have too much built-up perversion they keep bugging me with. Especially Sasori, he's too stuck up. I started glaring at my food for today. I think he puts something else on it everyday. This isn't a lunch it's a bloody full-course meal... I'm not even sure what that purple thing is called. But that's the steriotypical school lunch for you.

Speaking of lunch, Naruto sat down across from me with Sasuke. Covered in what looked like cheese, with bits of broccli in there somewhere. Something perked in my brain, and I almost impusively asked. "Naruto, have you guys seen Deidara and Sasori today?"

Naruto wiped some of the cheese off his face before it dried on. Then he looked up at me. "Not since yesterday, why?"

I felt Yahiko jerk up straight next to me. It wasn't untill I started wondering why he did it when I remembered that Naruto and Sasuke had gotten on the other bus.

Itachi was the first to verbally note that. "So they didn't even come to school."

"Why wouldn't they come to school?" Yahiko asked no one in particular.

Everyone got real silent for a second, and then Hidan shurgged his arms again. "Maybe they're having sex?"

-Later

Regardless of the fact that Deidara is 100% virgin, and Sasori's 100% the guy Katy Perry was singing about in 'Ur so Gay' Hidan's an idiot, as I told him when I went off because I'm starting to pysch out again.

Which is why, when I just about screamed in joy when we had free period instead of Math, I ran over to the Principal's office.

I'd only seen the Principal once since I've gotten here. And she was lecturing Hidan and Kakuzu for disrupting Recess with a cuss-fest. I wasn't even sure of wether to believe she was really a _Principal._

She's a few inches taller then me. Has long blond hair in loose pony tails, with brown eyes, painted red nails and a flippin' purple diamond on her forehead. Today she's wearing a yellowish buisiness suit and brown tights... Did I mention the breasts that put my own G-cups to shame?

She was away from her desk when I snuck myself inside. Looking over the recess yard, I knocked on the door after opening it and she turned her head. "Konan Nekohi, is there something wrong?"

"I'm sorry but, it's just that to my knowladge. Um, two of my friends haven't arrived to school today and I was wondering if you knew where they were?" I sounded so stupid saying it. But regardless, it _is_ exactly what I need to know.

She nodded, "Teachers were telling me that Sasori Akasuna and Deidara Sureiyunomi have been absent from all of their classes."

"Yeah, you- wern't informed of why?"

She shook her head and walked over to her wood desk that had a potted plant to the right and that's top was littered with papers. "Now that you've asked, I can call their guardian's and ask if they stayed home sick."

"You don't have to-"

"Nonsense, I want to know like you do." She picked up her phone and I raised my hand in the shy kind of way.

"Uh- call Sasori's first."

She nodded, "I know, Deidara's parents come and all they talk about is Kurotsuchi." She pulls a paper closer to her and sifts through it before dialing a number. I stand there feeling extreamly awkward as she sits down silently. Eventually she hangs up. "No answer, I'll try his Grandmother's cellphone number." She dials another number on the paper she's holding. Ten seconds after putting the phone to her ear she talks into it. "Mrs Akasuna? I wa-... yes Chiyo I know your husbands dead but-... Well what's the matter I was calling to ask for your-... Miss Aka- Chiyo I-..._ Slow down!_"

I think I just found the trait that won her as Principal. I take a deep breath, the I feel Yahiko behind me. I look at him and give the 'Don't-ask-I-have-no-idea' look.

Principal Tsunade starts up again. "Yes Chiyo I know you don't like me- why do you keep calling me a slug?... Well I'm sorry about that but if you- _Hey! _Tell me what your Grandson is doing and I'll hang up then!" I hear the old womans voice shout a few more things before it stops completely. Tsunade quiets a second before hanging up the phone.

"What is it?" Yahiko asks for me.

Tsunade's rustling papers around again and picks up a phone book in one of her drawers. "According to Chiyo, Sasori's in the Hospital." Yahiko almost started to leave but I grabbed his arm. "Hold on a few seconds, I'll drive you."

"Well hurry," Yahiko said very impatient, I'm trying to keep the words from sinking in before I start screaming.

She dials yet another number. "...Yes, I'm looking for a patient... No I just need to see if he's there... Deidara Sureiyunomi..." A lump in my throat, they couldn't- but- _shit shit shit shit shit._ "...Thank you." She hung up the phone and grabbed her keys. "Deidara's there too."

_Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit._

-Hospital

Tsunade drove us, she dropped us at the door saying she told the doctors we had her permission as an adult to have as much access as her.

I jittered my legs. The beat probably matching my heart. I think me and Yahiko wern't the first ones to hear. Because eventually, the whole gang was here. In simular states as us.

The friggin' woman at the _stupid_ desk said she still couldn't tell us what was going on. Except that the two minors had been found last night in a car wreak. Yahiko'd grabbed my hand and was clutching it. My mind was blank and- yet again. I was blinded with _stupid, stupid, _worry.

I looked up at one point, right when a white-clad nurse came out. She was older, tiny woman and had frizzed brown/red hair and green eyes. She scribbled on a notepad. I must've had a pleading look in my eyes while I looked at her, she looked down at me for a second and stopped. "You wouldn't happen to be waiting for the car crash victim kids?"

Me and Yahiko nodded our heads rapidly sitting up. In the corner of my eye the others stiffened up too.

She gave a short smile and gestured for us to calm down. "It's alright, one boy is already waking up." I calmed down for a second. But Yahiko caught that'd she'd only said the one,

"What about the other?"

The nurse looked at him with that knowing look. "He hasn't quite yet. He hit his head hard. But there isn't seem to be fatal damage."

"How close to fatal then?" He said, not letting her sugar-coat anything.

She let out a sigh. I can't imagine how she feels with telling us. "He received brain damage. But we won't know it's extent until after he wakes up."

Me and Yahiko shuddered. Hidan mumbled something about already having brain damage and you didn't have to look to know it was Kakuzu that hit him after that. I was getting to the point of crieing now. And the nurse sat down for a second to comfort me while Yahiko fell back into oblivion. The nurse was stroking my shoulder whispering comforts untill my own Mother actually appered.

She was in a pair of colorful scrubs. Holding her own notepad while she sat infront of me to help. "Thank you Jacinda, hurry back to your post." The nurse got up and after a good luck look she kept going the way she had been heading. It never occured that she wasn't even ment to give us any updates.

Mom held my arms from shaking while the tears started. Itachi'd walked over and taken the free seat. I choked words out. "What's g-going to ha-happen Mom?" I tryed to speak.

"They're both going to be fine. It's alright, honey just calm down." She tryed to sooth. I was close to listening untill I looked up over to Yahiko. His face blank, he knew the facts. He couldn't be clamed by sugar-coated nice words now. And I started crieing again.

"Can we see them?" Itachi said, breaking me out of the depression for a single moment.

Mom smiled and nodded. "If he's waking up it's best that you're there." I got up almost immidiantly and she led us towards the rooms. It felt like a final walk but it that it was over in seconds.

She nudged open the door. Yahiko took a step in. Itachi saw who it was and hid behind the wall. He didn't think his presense would help Deidara any.

I hurried over to his side after my legs started moving again. He wasn't hooked up to too many things. A couple things including his leg was in a cast and his eyes were half-lidded. He looked like a fallen angel in the white bed with his friggin gold locks surrounding him.

Mom was at the foot of the bed and Yahiko was on the other side. The others were either behind Mom or frozen in the doorway. I saw Kisame whispering status to Itachi behind the wall. Itachi still had his own cast on his arm. _The one he'd almost begged Deidara to decorate_. I grabbed one of his hands and buried my face in his bed. "Konan," He whisperd barely loud enough to register. I looked up and the second I saw that pained look on his face I hated it. "Where's Sasori?"

I choked a sob that must've scared the hell out of him. But then Yahiko spoke up. "He's alive Dei," But that just made me cry some more. I could hear the fake smile on his face. "You're both going to be fine."

-**End Chapter-**

And viola~

Do you hate me yet? or am I full of myself?

I think when I don't know what else to have Konan to say I just have her start cussing. It almost works too. (She was sooo close to completely in-character untill she started ranting about Sasuke last chapter, I am made of epic fail. XD She'll be total Canon in the Epilouge though, actually, just imagine what Konan would be like if she wasn't a mentally scarred ninja.)

Jacinda is my Mommy, so I've inserted most of my family in here already XD including myself. I am shameless.

This thing that's happen to Saso and Dei is actually the first thing that I thought of for the story. The origin is that- I wanted to make a story of them in the country like ConversationHearts' 'Crocodile Farm' And then I dreamed up a scene were Saso and Dei are in a carwreak. I thought of things to go around it- took the hellish place named Pony and took some experiances from there and put them as locations for plot points, started writting, and so yay~

But the first scene I ever dreamed up- The scene where Sasori and Deidara wreak, wasn't in here because I wanted to keep it in Konan's POV.

Normal POV was mainly for the Family Portraits chapter. And will happen again in the last chapter. Just because Akatsuki's running around so much, if you stay with Konan. You're missing over half the fun~

I actually got a resent layout problem. But it's Okie-dokies! I'll just lose a cliffhanger and some suspense that you would hate me for anyway~ I think I resolve things way too fast. But I love everyone too much to really make them suffer long. Unless I'm mircilously killing them all Saw-movie-style... YAY.

People who watch me might know that I've started another story, but no worries, this one still has my full attention. It's full speed ahead to the very last dramatic plot point!

But: I'll whore myself out anyway. If you prefer Ninja-Akatsuki, and don't mind slight Twilight bashery, My newest story 'Dawning of Twilight' is a must-read! PLZ?... Okay, I'll stop, you don't have too, I just like how I'm writting the Akatsuki in that one. NINJA'S RULE! SPARKLEY VAMPIRES DROOL!

On a random note: I just looked out the window to my Mommies Boyfriends boat... He named it 'O-Suzy-Q' XD

Chapters are getting too short, I'm upset. LONGAR! THEY MUST BE LONGAR! (Am I one of those fanfic authors who complain about the chapters being too short while the readers are like 'wtf no they're not'? But this one was THREE PARAGRAPHS shorter then the last one! and the last one was only around 4000 words! and the one before it was 5000! BUT THE ONE BEFORE THOSE WAS LIKE 10000!)


	13. The Good Boy

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing in this story, Akatsuki and all things Naruto-related are owned by Masashi Kishimoto.

Has it been a while since last update? I didn't notice. Artemis Fowl has consumed my attention span...

Have I ever mentioned that politian's should take life lessons from Naruto?... Have you ever heard the part where 'Poli' is a Greek/Italian/Something word for 'Many', while 'Tics' are blood-sucking bugs. Meaning the 'Politics' can translate to 'Many Blood-sucking creatures?'... And that my friends, is the randomness joke of the day. (Drum beat) thank you, thank you.

Yawn, I'm yawning alot in these authors notes aren't I? So if Konan ever says she's tired. It's because I just yawned and I couldn't think of what else for Konan to say...

YAAAAAAAWN... Yawn... Yawn... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN...Okay I just yawned for real XD

Your love is like a papercut so sweet~ (It's not deep, but it's hurting me~) Dahh! Stupid Vanessa Hudgens album my silly sister bought .

Right now Jewel's 'Pieces of Me' is playing though, which just makes me think of Karin, Ino, Deidara and then- Um. I dunno, none of the Naruto characters seem Jewish...

Okay, since I can't think of anything else interesting to say: RANDOM FUNFACT! Whenever I watch the Musical RENT(and any other movie really) I imagine the Naruto characters playing the roles.

Sasuke's Roger, Naruto's Mark, Sasori's Collins, Deidara's Angel, Pain's Benny, Sakura's Joann, and I'M MAUREEN!...

And Konan plays the homeless lady that cusses Mark out XD

Konan: "Who the _fuck_ do you think you are? I don't need no _Goddamned help,_ from some _bleeding heart, camera man_"

Deidara: "He was only helping honey~"

Konan: "Help? he's just trying to use me to kill his guilt! This town is _FULL_ of _MOTHERFUCKING ARTISTS!..._ Hey artist, got a dollar?... Didn't think so..."

Deidara: "... Yay~ New York city! Hahahaha~..."

Hey! Ironicly, 'Adrian' by Jewel just started playing! which kinda sums up the beggining of the chapter~ WEEEE It's lucky chapter 13! you know what that means?

-**The Good Boy-**

Mom, after almost endless interrogation from Yahiko, told the honest truth. Sasori had a 55% chance of dying. And a 85% chance of never waking up. He hit his head bad and above that got a piece of metal lodged in the back of his brain. They got it out, but the swelling wasn't letting it heal right. Giving a bad blow to his entire nerve system. Among those things, his Heart has a 45% chance of giving out because of a murmur he has.

But, despite all that. He apparently had barely a scratch more. No, he's just in a bloody _coma_.

Deidara wouldn't comment, he just wouldn't. They can't make him either, which they don't need to really. He was the one beat up. His legs broken, he can't sit up because four ribs are shattered, his wrist is screwed up to hell. His foots broken, his face is all scratched up.

But he's _awake._

It's not right. Not that I could stand it if Deidara was the one in that state. It'd probably be worse for me. Deidara's just that presious baby of Akatsuki. The one that won't stop talking and thinks he needs to be included in everything. Sasori's the sarcastic asshole, the one that swore and insulted me on my first day in town. The one that wants to flip off the world and then move into the mountains to be alone forever.

And they were best friends.

And one was dying.

_This is not happening..._

-One Month Later

It's been a month. Snatch away my personality, hand me a werewolf plushie and call me Bella Swan.

Deidara's a wreak. Speaking of which- Me, Deidara and Hidan were walking to the latters house one day. A kid walks past us, talking to another kid about something. One of them says the word 'wreak' And Deidara stops walking and starts sobbing right there and then.

Yeah, it's been great. And Deidara's not just the only one that's miserable. Everyone is. Just Deidara's the most... Actively miserable.

I've had my nights where nothing's happened to trigger it but I still just begin crieing myself to sleep. It's mind-numbingly pathetic. But it's my life, my friends, my jackass-friend that's in the Hospital that won't wake up and I'm going crazy and I think I'm gonna start crying in school again oh my god I'm pathetic kill me kill me _killmekillmekillme. Please kill me now!-_

"Konan!"

I snap my head up. Yahiko gives me the 'you were damning your life again wern't you?' look.

"I'm sorry," I say for no reason.

"For what?" He asks with a sigh.

Ugh, defeated, I bang my head against the desk. "Nothing."

It was Homeroom, all the classes flew by. I guess the less-brain-dead members are doing everyones homework so we don't fail. I haven't looked at a school book in ages.

"Konan, just hang together. Sasori'll be okay." He's been saying bull-shit like that all month, "_Pay attention."_ I shook my head and looked up. Everyone was moving to their seats. I look around at everyone. Itachi's scribbling in papers. Kakuzu's doing the same- probably members of the homework crew. Kisame looks like he has a headache. Yahiko's massive-stressed and I make a mental note to really _try_ to pull myself together. Try and find something to distract myself.

Deidara's in that staring-at-nothing-untill-someone-pulls-you-out-of-the-chair place. Hidan looks like he's about to fall asleep. Without Mister-Sunshine-Deidara there to back him up and look less like an idiot while being an idiot. Hidan's laziness kicks in more often and all he does is sleep.

Zetsu walks into the classroom. I try to pay attention. I just see a orange blur behind him. "Class, attention." I swear he was addressing to us Akatsuki. "We have a new student in the school. Show your welcome."

I look at the orange blur now. It's bashfully having a rushed conversation but Zetsu holds his hand up and gestures to the room. It gives up and stands at front of the room.

I focus my eyes hard, before realizing it was water making everything blurry. I wipe my eyes and look up. Customized bleached pants covored with patches and logos. Orange jacket over a pink shirt. And a orange hat with a swirl pattern that's covoring most of his face. The top half of it is shadowed and I can barely make out his eyes. His skin is dead-pale with black hair.

He perked up slightly and raised his hand. "I'm Tobi! Hi!"

Tobi-dobi-tobi-dobi-tobi-nobody-tobi-mobi~ okay stop singing... Okay my hearts hurting again keep singing- Tobi-lobi-tobi-doni-tobi-tabby-tobi-showme-money~

A couple kids mocked '_Hiii Tobi~'_ I was silent, feeling dead-tired and slightly wretched.

"Thank you very much Tobi, you can go sit in the free seat in the front." I didn't like that seat being empty anyway. It reminded me too much of the empty seat behind me.

It's infront of Hidan and to the right of Itachi. I actually feel sorry for Itachi- it can't be fun doing five other kids' homework. Now I know how the bullied nerds feel- er, kind of.

The kid pulls the seat out with a _screech _that wakes Hidan up. Who starts up with a snore and drool on his face. Then he blinks and trys to figure out what he missed, Tobi laughs.

Hidan turned around like he was about to just ask Deidara, but the blonde is nothing but a pile of gold hair on the desk right now. And I kind of hope he's sleeping.

-Later

I didn't listen to what was going on in class. I threw my mind elsewhere and daydreamed. My life is so annoyingly cliche, I'll never call the Lifetime movies unrealistic again.

I felt the fact that Yahiko might have to drag me out of my chair again. It's like the entire chain is broken, that just the one member leaving, and Akatsuki is falling apart. There are the times where there's that itching in the back of my head, where I think- or more so _realize._ Sasori might die, Sasori's going to die, he'll be brain-dead, crippled, a vegitable if he ever wakes up. One of thems going to happen.

If he dies will it help? or will it just mean that we'll all be stuck in this state for the rest of our _lives?_ Ugh, ow. My head's hurting.

Yahiko pats my shoulder, I try and snap out of it and kind-of slowly get up. Yahiko didn't _completely_ pull me. I look over to Deidara who's sitting sideways in his chair. He might actually be having fun- watching Hidan sit infront of him and make faces and say stupid stuff.

I look at something else, Tobi, the newbie is shuffling things in his bag trying to get all those new schoolbooks to fit. Wow, he's like' _pure white_ pale. I watch him look up, he doesn't see me staring, he's looking intently at something else.

I look at Akame too. She doesn't 'acknowladge' me any more, as in- whenever she sees me she sticks up her nose and struts past without looking. I catch Kagura giving us death glares every so often. Where as the creepy one is the boy-cronie that has a crush on me, who, very actively acknowladges me... Well, my body at least.

I finally look to the floor. Yahiko's waiting for everyone- namely Deidara- to get up and moving before leading us out. Which we take up over half the class, so the rooms still pretty full.

"What's your name?" I heard someone say. I turned around a quick minute. Tobi was talking to Deidara. The moping, stotic-faced blond friend of mine. That was probably thinking of ways to kill himself right now. I couldn't hear from where I was, but I saw Deidara mouth his name. So maybe Tobi heard it. "Wanna be friends?" I almost screeched, I watched as Deidara turned his head more towards him. A disbelieveing look wandering on his face.

Then he punched the poor kid in the face and I wasn't quite as scared any more. It was actually kind of funny, don't know why so many people are shocked and running over there.

-Later

"He was the Principals _son?_" I said aloud. Me and Yahiko accompanied Deidara to the nurses office. Because apparently we counted as parental guardians since his parents hate him.

Shizune the nurse smiled nervously. "Nephew, technically. But he doesn't have any other family so he's staying with her and... I'm sure he'll be fine." Although she was reffering more to Deidara's punishment.

Deidara almost broke the boys nose. I'll never call him gay again. Or at least not an Uke. One of the volenteers is behind her holding a steak to Tobi's face. He's whining quietly and I'm really close to feeling sorry. But at the same time estactic because that's the most emotion besides utter depression Dei's showed in a while... If face-pulverizing is an emotion.

Dei just yawns. Besides the whole depression thing, Deidara's been awfully slow period, he just got his leg out of the cast. His wrist probably should have stayed in one, but that sucker-punch sure stated it's current health.

With the cast on, Tobi's _face_ would have likely broken. But regardless, I broke my finger jumping off a swing once. But Deidara broke his flippin' skeleton. I'm starting to think we need to coat him in bubble wrap.

Hidan too though, he got his wrist-cast he'd had off. But then he broke his middle finger. I really thought he was going to start crying, because it was his favorite finger.

The nurse is scribbling all-over a paper. And then she hands it to us. "Listen, the boy said he wasn't going to do anything about it." Like not press charges, I guess they do crap like that in the school. But oh well. "You three can all just go on ahead and I'll send him out when he's- um... done," AKA: stopped crying like a five-year-old.

But I'm in a very blah mood right now. And Yahiko seems relieved that Deidara's not in big trouble. So I turn around and follow the line out of the place.

The halls are empty save for Hidan, Kakuzu and a few kids hanging by their lockers chatting. Hidan's leaning against Kakuzu's locker, apparently moaning. Or maybe it's just a new type of yawn, or mating call, hard to tell.

Yahiko begins escorting Deidara to his locker, because he thinks if he's left alone for more then five seconds he'll find something to kill himself with. I hang back because the whole 'babysitting the suicidal' isn't the kind of parole I really have the emotions for. I was left alone in the hosptial room with Deidara once and I had to hold my breath to keep from crying.

Kakuzu, when he's not yelling at Hidan or lecturing us on finances, is actually a like cool older brother, one that everybody's secretly scared shitless of, but having a calm conversation with him is better then thinking about the loud-mouthed blond bitch called reality.

"How're my grades?" I ask, sounding almost dizzily in denial.

He looked up from between his weird-ass mask thingy and head bandana. "You're getting a B- in Math, everything else is B+ or A-"

Hidan seemed to be groaning the lyrics to a death metal song. Or maybe he's still yawning. "What're we doing today?" I ask. Asking that question every morning makes things feel normal for a moment. Well, normal for Akatsuki.

Hidan streched for a second and Kakuzu found a better standing position. So close but yet so far. "I don't think anyone wants to go to the Cafe today." He said, liked he usually did when there wasn't anyone around to say they're hungery.

But the thing is, we won't just go home. Not going to the Cafe, and not doing a lately very depressing concert, ment that the thing we'll do is go to the Hospital. To visit our incapacitated member.

-Later-In Akatsuki Alley

I let out a yawn, I just feel so tired. Yahiko's sitting close next to me tearing up the grass that I'm not sure of how is growing from the cracks. I think Hidan's asleep again, sleep, sleep, sleep. I never thought I'd miss his loud mouth so much.

I miss noise, I really, _really_ miss the noise. I miss it really, really bad. _The noise reminds you you're alive..._ Well that's a depressing analogy.

I think it's from a news show about the fattest man alive I saw when I was 9. That's a strange twist.

It's fuckin' cliche that everyone is so visably mopey. We're a picture draw by someone who brags about being able to draw emotion, but can't seem to draw refrained emotion. I think I thought that one up looking through library books once.

Itachi and Kisame don't really make noise anymore either. They never did really, Itachi was the quiet one and Kisame is self-consious or something stupid. It's impossible to ignore them but easy to forget they're there, if it makes any sense.

Deidara's sitting on a over turned box. He's moving though, grinding a hole in the dirt infront of him with his boot heel. It's been awhile since he bothered to even show boredom.

We're supposed to wait for Mom to finish up a late-shift at work and then she'll come pick us up, and take us _back_ to her work. Then we can sit in the creepy white room and feel more depressed. I'm still clutching onto hope with all my might though, but thinking about it prickles the back of my mind and floods reality through the holes.

Yahiko actually said _keep your chin up._ Which I try when I'm depressed, it does do alittle something. But the lack of logic for why is there, but then I can spend brain power wondering why and ignore all else.

I looked up, a pink and orange animal was standing in the entrance... Wait, that's Tobi.

He looked over at Deidara who was entranced with the beautiful cement ground now. The big black bruise was still quite noticable on his face. He got down on his knees infront of Deidara. "Deidara-Sempai? did I do something wrong?"

Deidara looked up at him just then. Eyes wide, mouth about to start dangling open. I think he twitched alittle. "...Get this thing away from me."

Hey, he said something. That's pretty cool magic Tobi. You use Nevermore? you look like the Seelie Faery type. "Why should we do that?"

"He's making me nausous." Deidara growled, "Get him _away_."

Okay, don't want Deidara killing anyone today. "Tobi, right? come over here." I called.

Deidara flipped his hair around and glared at me. " I want him _out._"

"You have no right to ban people from here Deidara." Yahiko said, finally having another perfect chance for authority-voice. Tobi crawled to me. Yahiko leaned closer next to me to talk to him. "What'er you doing here?"

He rubbed his eye and yawned alittle. Like a tired five-year-old. "I was bored, and I wanted to know if I hurt Deidara-Sempai's feelings. No one was talking to me so~" He looked around the little area we had captured. "Here I am~"

Wow, he's adorabley stupid. I love him. A stupid thought invaded my head. And before I could give it a thick coating of reason, I looked up at Yahiko. "I want him."

Yahiko smiled and looked at the newbie. "Wanna join Tobi? we're just a group of kids with too much time on their hands."

He smiled "Sure~" I think Deidara gagged, nice seeing some emotion from him again. Insert smiley face here.

Yahiko got down next to me. Listening to him makes me amazed, never knew he had a sweet, gentle side quite like this. "So what drew you to Deidara-Chan Tobi?"

Tobi took a more comfortable position sitting down next to me. Hidan apparently had never really been asleep and was laughing for some reason. And I think Kakuzu muttered something like "Another member?"

Tobi thought and then opened his mouth. "I dunno, he just looked fun, and pretty. I couldn't tell if he was a boy or a girl when I saw him."

Tobi's a pretty good athlete, he stayed out of Deidara's clutches for a whole five minutes of running around the school.

Then there was an itching in my head. After watching Deidara get dragged off for extra detention. Hidan and Itachi continuously chuckle. Kakuzu and Kisame facepalm and comment to eachother on the stupidity. Yahiko having to be the parental guardian again...

Is this the new group?

-At the Hospital

I blinked, wait, what happened?

I was overcome by a high and somehow convinsed Yahiko with three short words to insert this poor unfortunate soul into our depressed circle of depressingly depressed depression.

I'm actually starting to think Deidara's seemingly constaint anger towards Tobi is going to be worse for his general lifespan then the depression...

But really it was just like _SNAP_ and he was here and it was weird and kind of my fault and now we're at the Hospital, and the point to myself being- _what the fuck just happened?_

Tobi, the little fucker, is now happily talking with my Mom in the hallway. Itachi's there too, he doesn't come into this room, mainly because it's the only time in which Deidara is somewhat content. And Itachi's presense can send that into the shitter in a instant.

Kisame holds his persistaint front standing in the doorway. Maybe mumbling things to Itachi, but I don't really care to wonder too much. Hidan and Kakuzu still stick to the side wall lined with chairs, doing nothing more then just being here. Sasori's Grandmother Chiyo seemingly never leaves her spot from the corner of the room, however always spitting wisecracks and morbid humor about being in a Hospital all the time.

Yahiko paces the room. I sit in a chair next to the bed. Deidara's in a lala-land with his head resting on the corner of the mattress. It's so creepy it's worthy of being a My Chemical Romance album cover.

Usually, we wait untill a cranky nurse kicks us out or Deidara falls asleep. I don't know which one it'll be tonight, I just notice that Deidara seems to be extra clingy to Sasori's bedside tonight.

Tobi must feel like a-... one, two, three, four... eighth wheel, like going with your friend to their relatives funeral and being the only one not sobbing... now why the _fuck_ did I have to say funeral?

-Next day

Everything was so depressingly normal. I seem to be using the word depressed alot. But anyway.

I stumble my way over to the dresser, Naruto's behind me giving some sort of overenthusiatic pep-talk to get me there. Have you ever felt the opposite of a headache where your head is so calmed, mellow and empty that you could vomit?

Naruto tugs me down the stairs, Yahiko hands me a egg sandwich. Apparently he thinks I'm not in the condition to handle a fork.

I have to focus on eating it because it's double-stuffed and I'm trying to keep pieces from falling out, I think Yi'ko probably planned it that way. When I'm done I brush off my hands and run my fingers threw my hair to try and make sure it isn't frizzed to all hell, seeing as how I haven't effectively brushed it in a month. I use an extra shiney part of the stove to see if I have any outragous facial blemishes. Nope.

But then I feel Yahiko's hand brush a bit of egg off my cheek. Maybe I should use a real mirror. Where did I put all my compacts? I honestly don't remember. Wait, on my vanity shelf. That makes alot of sense.

But it must be too late because Naruto's heading for the door. Yawn, I can't take this blankness much longer... I think I said that last week.

-At School

It was sweet, but still widely unneeded that we were excused from Gym activities. But it's also a sizable amount creepier when Coach Guy goes out of his way to come and give us a youthful pep talk.

If we all hide in the library, the talks can't be too loud. The Librarian, Mr. Gekko-lizard thingy whatever. Is the one that makes the most noise coughing in here.

Deidara seems to have found a chair hidden behind a few bookcases, probably hoping Guy won't be able to find him. Me and Yahiko face our fate and sit at a study table, fruitlessly trying to take the blunt of Guy's speeches. Kakuzu has a rather effective way of hiding, going to memorize all the titles in a diffrent section every day. Kisame's impressive too, he trys to make it look like he's doing something.

I attempt not to yawn. Yahiko has his head on his fist waiting for Guy to walk in.

The door opens- ohgaaaaawd.

No, no, no, Guy is not wearing nothing but a bloody speedo. I didn't even know this school had a pool! what the hell?

He's still wet _too,_ this is not happening.

Now, usually, Yahiko's pretty damn pale. But he's almost as blue as Kisame right now, and I think his eyes are about to roll back.

"It is very nice to see you children!" He says, still rather loudly. "Now, normally, I spend my time cheering you all up, as you know." Scary, cheery, no diff, right? "But today I'm here on offical buisness." ...Hnnn... "I'm merely delivering a student who can't quite handle the youthful sports of youth quite yet, he's fallen and hurt his ankle during such activities." It registers what he's saying and I lean back to see behind him.

Tobi's twiddling his fingers, besides the same orange hat, he has a old sports jacket on, under it is a dirty T-shirt and then paint-stained cargo shorts. He's avoiding putting pressure on a shoeless foot. "He slip on the side?" I asked.

"No actually," Guy proclaims, "He tripped over a bench in the changing room." I blinked, Tobi rubs the back of his head, pale pink ghosting up his almost white cheeks. Smiling nervously. "But I must go now! but remember- chin up! shoulders back! chest out and smile!" He glees like that's the best advice in the world. I tried it once, Hidan kept giving me weird looks.

Tobi bashfully sits down next to me. "Oopsie."

"On the contrary Tobi. We should have tried that." Yahiko muses, after recovering with Guy's leaving, he trys being light-hearted. I have to remember to tell him he fails at it.

Tobi's head falls down to where his chin is almost on his stomach. I can't think of anything motherly to say, so I just lean on th table to narrate things.

I blinked, just once and then I notice Tobi bring his head up. He sees something, and somehow without looking, I figure out what it is. "Deidara-Sempai!"

Yahiko almost laughs when Deidara makes a sound that sounds something like one of Naruto's screams as Tobi tackles him.

-Later

Something about the weather and apparently something that concerns Anko Miterashi being late for work somehow led to Principal Tsunade deciding that everyone should have lunch in the recess yard. I try not to question anything, but make my own ideas from a pile of crushed metal in the middle of the road. And I think that might be blood. Or oil, maybe it's oil.

It seems as though Tsunade had anticipated something like this someday happening, because she somehow had enough Bento Boxes stored away for every kid in School. Mine looks like it's in the shape of a Alice in Wonderland scene. Or maybe it's just moldy.

Or the fuzzy stuff could be from a peach, I dunno, but I always peal my peaches. Which apparently is weird, but, anyway.

If I was still the the state of whining about the small town population, the surprisingly crowded recess yard would have eased my rootless worries.

Yahiko's on my left and Kakuzu's chilling on my right. Hidan's gobbling things at my feet, and that's making me more nausous then the possibley-unpeeled peaches.

I look at my lunch. I eat a few things that look good, they taste extreamly strange, then I give the box to Hidan. Who doesn't seem to care. As he gobbles and gorges so he can sleep for another month.

I get up to walk around, patting Yahiko so he knows I'm not going to walk into traffic.

These itching feelings bug the hell out of me. Everytime I try to think 'Hey, everythings gonna turn out okay, I'm sure of it.' the itching feeling in my brain and it's like someone screaming how bad I'm lying. It's like I don't wanna give up hope but there isn't any to hold on to.

I ponder my current mental dilema a while untill I get to the corner of the fence. Tsunade's sitting at the picnic table boredly splitting her fast-food burrito with Tobi. Her nephew, apparently. I just now notice that Tobi doesn't have any scars from Deidara beating him up. And however he has a thin wrapping on his ankle, he's patting it against the floor fully healed.

He finishes his last bite in a gulp. Mumbles something to Tsunade with a full mouth and she nodds, hey, someone she won't yell at.

He picks up his bookbag and comes over my way. "Hi Kon-Chan!" ...Kon-Chan? It took Kisame a month to earn the rights to that nickname, and I like Kisame a reasonable deal. But then, Tobi is so gullibly adorable... Kinda looks like Corny post-makeover from Ironside...

...Tobi and Yahiko as boyfriends... Something that would take to long for me to think about and fully relish. And Tobi's already waving his hand in my face. "Hi Tobi."

"What'cha doin?"

"Trying not to die of boredom." I think. I said that at a fair once, because I wanted to go with the other kids up on a closed down stage and then one of them asked me stupidly why I was there... My minds wandering. And Tobi's hand is in my face again. "Sooo, Tsunade's your Aunt?"

He smiles and recites something he must have made in his freetime. "She's the widow of my Mom's stepbrother." Well, close enough.

"And your parents?" Probably not something I should ask having known the entire Akatsuki's clicheingly depressing and video-game worthy backgrounds.

He averts eyes like he's really thinking hard. "Um, my Mom died a year ago." Strike one. "I dunno my Dad, but Aunty Tsunade said she knows he's still in this town." Strike two. "Annnnd... Ummmmm," What ummmm? "... ummmm... right, she won't tell me because she said he's a worthless asshole, so I really have no idea where he is."

Well, that's nice. I'd almost laugh if I wasn't fully aware of how sugerly serious he is... He acts like he's five, I mean, wow. But I'm being absurdly nosey, even though I'm kind of the one that got him entered into Akatsuki.

"What happened to your friend?" He asked, well, nosey for nosey.

I blink. "Um, car wreak. He's really fine though. " The itching, and I'm this close to just randomly screaming Invader Zim style. I think my eye just twitched.

"Okay then~" He cooes, "... Does Deidara hate me?"

"Would that stop you any?" He puckers, really thinking about it. Damn I just wanna pinch him senseless.

"...Um, no, I don't think so." This is ridiculous. I sigh, but it'd muted out by the bell.

Everyone starts for the doors. I turn around, the sun is angled with the trees and mountains that it's fooling everyone with a afternoon light effect. The light blinds me for just a second I turn around to shield and regroup my senses.

Someone roughly shoves Tobi and a couple books fall out of his bag. I instinctively bend down to help him pick them up.

The crowd quickly thins out and senses start to return. He smiles and pushes back his hat as he gets up. "Thanks~!" He says absurdly sweetly. But I look up and see his face clearly for the first time. In this light his skin looks mildly healthy and his eyes look almost red. Creepy.

"Konan!"

Getting up getting up getting up. I chase after Yahiko who holds the doors open for me as the recess yard is completely deserted.

-Later

I arch my back for it to crack. We're heading down the steps of the School towards the buses, sliently all confirming to ourselves that we'll just go straight home today.

Me and Yahiko climb bus number 1 with Itachi and Kisame. I think I spotted Naruto in the corner of my eye but I just sit down and slump in my seat for the whole ride.

"Are you sure you're really alright Konan?" It's not the first time he's said it, he's said it to all the others too. I wouldn't be the first one to not answer him too. Itachi had just smiled sliently for a total 1.4 seconds. Need I mention Deidara again?

I think about it. I'm about ready to just give up. If I give up, I won't be in a sour mood all the time, and after everything Mom's said, there really is minimal chances of a miracle. I blink. "Yeah, peachy-keen." But my lazy voice tells me there's a part that hasn't given up yet. Damn.

He rolls his eyes. Leaning forward with his head against the seat infront of us. He surely hasn't given up, but I always have thought of him as a pretty big idiot. Not an idiot like Hidan or Tobi, a very, very, _special_ idiot.

Tobi does seem like he could be legally retarded though. And I'm pretty sure Hidan as ADD. Like Naruto has ADHD. But Naruto's lovable, and it's hard to think of Yahiko as lovable in anyway.

Thinking of annoying metaphors to discribe everyone I know, I notice the bus has stopped and we're here.

Yahiko's grumpiness doesn't stop him from taking my hand and pulling me out of the seat. Kisame and Itachi are already flanking us as we get out. Yahiko raises his hand in signal that we're allowed to seperate now.

Naruto replaces them as a flanker- is that a word? And we continue on. I go slow to the point that Yahiko is pulling me. It seems to be mainly just to annoy him.

"Itachi! this is for Sasuke and Naruto!" I look up, Madara's standing on the bar's porch, he throws Itachi a basketball, and I recall Naruto popping their old one on a pile of rubble. Naruto cheers, Madara waves at the giddy little blonde that's spazzing next to me. I attempt a read out of his face, because I've never seen Madara show any emotion stronger the sarcasim. His face is still quite blank, as I can see from the setting sun that peeps out as the buses pull away. Just a thin line of a mouth and nothing much to say about his eyes that look eerily red in this light...

Wait.

-**End Chapter-**

Yay~ finished~ I had to rip this out quick, because it's way past my imaginary due date and I had to do it before I became consumed in a Holly Short & Lili Frond house on my Sims 2 game.

Since I can't think of much to say, besides the fact that: I reward the idea of Madara and Tobi as two seperate bodies of people to elric0sis. I'm gonna say what I think I already said once. After this is done, I'm gonna write a story thingy that has a bunch of events that took place in this world, but before the start of this story. Like a series of prequils. Like these Akatsuki getting together and crap. And maybe one chapter that shows what Karin was doing when she wasn't in school, which took place durring this story but we never saw it. I dunno, I just like to write Team Hawk. As for the story, how does the title 'Before the Savior Call' sound? sucky, I know. But that'll be it unless someone can blow my mind with a better one. yay.

Oh, and I kind of have a note. Chapter 16 of this story- incase I fail to mention it any other time. Will inevitably take a while to write. On account of me not being good with writting action sequences and the fact that I'm gonna have to play my Bully game repeatedly in order to get some accurate knowladge of how they'll be doing what happens in chapiterz sixteenerino~ So those are some hints of what'll happen to it. It'll be much easier to figure out once we get to chapter 15. Bwhahaha, prepare to get mildly pissed at Konan by that time.

Okay, the next chapter: Hm, There's a story to this. When I layed out the story, it came up as a perfect 20 chapters. But then I realized that I had clifhangers pre-written for scenes that couldn't be the ending scenes. So I had to mild out one cliffhanger, and combine it with another chapter, so that although it should have been a cliffhanger, it wasn't. And so another scene that happens shortly after that, ends the story and creates the cliffhanger. Which- so, okay. The last scene of the next chapter is one of the first scene I ever came up with for this story. Have fun... Oh, about when it'll be out... ummm, I've grow bored with my Sims 2 ArtyHoly house when I realized I couldn't get all the generations to fit in the house without the use of high-glitch-risk cheats. And with my next scheduled to make house, Holly Lili roomies who hate eachother. That'll last... I dunno how long, I just wanted a house where one character could become an Actress. Not to mention that me and my rather lazy sissy are making that Dawning of Twilight crap. And that Artemis Fowl: The Atlanis Complex is coming out next week, and it's the penultimate volume of the Arty series, and supposedly ends with of cliffhanger of Arty being insane... I'm also scared crapless of a TrubHolly ending, since I'm a active ArtyHoly-tard. and- I'm losing the point of my ranting...

...Next chapter, ummm. Half-written. I just need to write the beggining crap, and then some actively depressing filler crap in-between the two pre-written scenes... So okay! hopefully soon! YAY! Thanksies to all reviewers~~~!... hey, according to my readout, this is a decently long chapter... yay!


	14. The Bad Boy

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else used in this story.

Okay, so... Since I have minimal to say, I'll say this!

I had a dream once where me and my sister were renting video games at a store, Among them was one game about Silver the Hedgehog from the Sonic the Hedgehog series I luvies so much, and another seemed to center around Sasuke and Sakura as the main characters. But two stood out for me in the dream.

There was a large amount of games derived from the Naruto world. One really popular game, that I was going to rent in the dream but it cost too much, has Deidara as main character. With a Final Fantasy/Castlevania cover. He was in a Deidara-esque armor outfit with a gun standing in the rain. Rather cheesy. But after waking up, I came up with a plot. Which because of the Final Fantasyness, came out like the only Final Fantasy game I've ever actively played, which was- uhhh, the one where you play as Yuuna, Rikku, and...uh, Paine... XD

But here's the cheesy crap I came up for what it says on the back of the case! Game entitled: Deidara: Sonnet LXVI

"Tired with all these, for restful death I cry."

Disowned, abandoned, exiled, captured. And then Akatsuki disbanded. Deidara must now burn his own way through the chaos of the world looking for the closest thing to family he's ever had. But with fate turning against him, will he be able to end it when he finally has?

LGBroductions presents another video game from the life of Naruto. With hundreds of new explorable locations.

"But save then to die, I leave my love alone."

XD That's what happens when I read 'The Wasteland' comics at the same time I'm thinking. But in the dream, I ended up renting two cheap ones. One was the Sasuke&Sakura one. The other was one that: rather happily, in the dream I had actually turned over and read the back of. Now the cover was Silent Hill-esque. With Orochimaru- yes, my PRESIOUS OROCHIMARU-KUNZ Against a spraypainted and bloodstained wall that held the title. Behind the wall were zombie-like prisoners and Sasuke's silloette. My loving memory provided rememberance of what the back said. Game entitled: Orochimaru: Sinful Utopia

After giving all of his prisoners a strange new serum he'd been developing. They slowly start to change and warp out of control in ways no one could imagine. Orochimaru must get to the bottom of this on his own, or else let his own empire destory himself. If only he hadn't given his most valuble ally, Sasuke. The serum too...

With beautiful new graphics never seen in any other Naruto game. Follow the hit TV series most feared villian in his own territory, with his own enemy.

XD LOL that's it. I'm gonna go to video game college, and I'm gonna make those games XD Gasp! or better yet! a interactive Fanfic? maybe I should just learn how to make a perl game. BWHAHAHA! Beware my subconsious!... Oh, right, the story... Continue on.

-**The Bad Boy-**

Later, at a dinner I would usually discribe as annoyingly calm and depressing for that of Jiraiya's table. I poked at my sweet corn that was spilling across the plate. Soggying my instant mashed potatoes and contaiminating my Mom's world-class ham-gravy she usually only makes on Thanksgiving.

Naruto's making the most noise. Then there's Jiraiya's laughing at him and Mom's small-talk. I don't really feel apart of it. Like I'm in a resturaunt sitting at a diffrent table. But that's just more cliche crap about my life.

Yahiko never makes sound anyway. He doesn't seem to make a scratching noise of his fork on the plate either. The current plates are seemingly disney themed, like the ones you get for free after buying a twenty-dollar meal at McDonalds. But- oh, scraped a bit of potato away, is that Squall? Okay, these are Kingdom Hearts plates I see.

I had a boyfriend that was a videogame nut. It was mind-numbingly annoying watching him argue with Donald and Goofy about not healing him enough. Naruto has the game too, but he only argues with Sasuke about 'where the hell are those damned puppies?'

I blink. I'm thinking clearly, that's good, right? If mumbling about videogames is clear. Maybe something else?

Madara, a Daddy... I wonder... Daddy Madara... Daddy Maddie... It actually sounds kind of awsome.

Not that same eye color means anything. But there are very few people in this town. But weird eye and hair colors aren't really out of the ordinary. Mom's hair is pea-soup green for Goofy's sake. And Yahiko eyes are steel gray... Wait, I think Russian people have gray eyes. Where'd I hear that? Right, some documentry about Rasputin.

But but but... Could I figure out how right I am? It's kind of confirmed to me at least. But then I have no proof. And women's intuition never won in Divorce Court.

But Madara _is_ the 'worthless asshole'. He's kind of like Gaston from Beauty and the Beast, only smart. Would it matter at all if I tried to help little, naive Tobi find his Daddy? or would that make things worse and get me five weeks detention?

In my absent thoughts of weighing pros and cons in my head. I shove some potatoes in my mouth- wow, those are actually good. I forgot how real-fake food tastes.

...Yahiko's not Russian, but anyway- an accent would sound awsome on him though. I don't know what it is with me and accents, whenever I read a book my inner-voice is British.

I'm thinking relatively clearly for the first time in over a month. And all I can think of are bloody accents.

If planning ways to get Tobi and Madara together and be sure is clearing my cliched haze, I can keep going.

-Three days later-Sunday

I spent the first few days reveling in the fact that I can think clearly. But now it's the weekend, I have one last choice... Not sure why I said one last, but my imaginary due date is the start of school.

Mom has the day off and has spent it chattering with Jiraiya. Yahiko is out with the gang, but I don't think Tobi's with them, Yahiko told him to keep his distance with Deidara for a while. Yahiko just thinks too long of him being away and the group will fall apart. Too late for that. If vision had a color their area would be plain gray.

Naruto's playing videogames, Sasuke's not here, he's doing odd jobs around town for spare change. Best way for Naruto to help there is to not participate. So Naruto can actually spend a day apart from him, it's amazing.

I walk over and plop on the jade couch behind him. He's stareing at the screen in a 'gotta beat this mutant' trance. Let's test my theory on what he can do in this trance.

"Naruto?"

"Yea?"

"What can you tell me about Madara?"

"Sasuke's uncle."

"And?"

"Owner of the bar."

"And?"

"Moved here in his twenties."

"And?"

"Gets Akatsuki out of trouble alot."

"And?"

"Really doesn't like Anko."

"And?"

"Has only had one girlfriend his whole life."

"And?"

"Tells stories about not seeing her for 14 years and for all he knows he has a kid."

"And?"

"Sasuke knows he has a kid cuz he's really smart and got ahold of some records and me and him laughed for hours because through the kid Madara's related to Tsunade."

"Thank you Naruto,"

"Your welcome."

Well, mission accomplished, that was inhumanly easy. I was about to walk away when he said twenties. But if him and Sasuke have already done the work for me.

"Jiraiya?" I call over as I get up to see him in the kitchen.

"Yes doll-face?"

Did he seriously just call me doll-face? anyway. "Do you know where Sasuke's at right now?"

"I saw him mowing Kagura Bitchy's yard when I took out the trash, why?"

"Top secret cliched buisness." I twirl around and head out the door. Great, he's at Kagura's, and even Jiraiya knows she's a bitch.

I exit the screen door and stand on the porch. I can see the navey and gray thing down below is Sasuke. At Kagura's pimped-out rich people house on Kisame and Sasori's street.

A flitter, just thinking Sasori's name and it's like I got wacked upside the head. I blink a second and compose myself, forgetting anything I might have started thinking, and head down the driveway.

I scamper down the whole way and skid through some rocks. I barely miss running into a car driveing over the narrow road. I gleefully look both ways before crossing the street after that and reach Sasuke with only minimal damage. "Ey, Emo-Princess."

He lifts his head and glares through my skull. "What?"

He's adorable when he's pissed. "Naruto said you- um." Patiently waiting for luck to run out. " found out Madara had a kid?"

He leans onto the handle of the turned-off push mower. "Yeah, it's that new kid."

I twitch alittle, "Twerp, let me uncover a mystery single-handedly!"

"What? It's not like we never accomplished anything before you got here." Okay, if my life was a story, I wouldn't be a main character. I'd be a support character that leaves after a story arc and whose fanbase is more of a miniature cult. But Sasu-gay has a point, I should be thrilled I hardly have to do crap.

But the story of my life most certainly wouldn't win any adventure awards. I just magically ask the right person first and then automatically get all the information I need. But moving on. "Does Madara know he's here?" I try.

"Not a clue, he made jokes about probably having a kid since the only lady he accurately recalls hooking up with. Madara's one of those guys who's a genius, but in some cases is extreamly stupid. Like Einstine trying to talk about the social interaction."

Sounds like he could've spawned a Tobi. But anyway, Sasuke's views are less interesting then Itachi's. But that may be because I know he isn't in all cases mentally stable. "And how do you suppose, great prophet, how I were to intervine in this situation?"

He thinks about it, maybe taking the great prophet crack as a compliment. "How smart do you think Tobi is?"

"Null in void." I spurt out quite bluntly.

Sasuke absorbs such information. "I dunno, start by bringing the two together and see if they notice something. Otherwise, walk up to Madara and tell him you were doing a family tree report and that you quite casually 'figured something out'."

I nodd, I was actually pretty close to thanking him but a shutter on the house moved and I scurried away out of Kagura's possible sight range.

I paced along the road for a while, actually seeing if I could think up a better idea then Sasuke's. Nothing came to me, probably mainly because Sasuke's was so geniusly simple and easy. I sighed, and decided to walk up the road, past Kagura Bitchy's house. And see if Kisame will give me a ride.

Kisame's been doing pretty good compared to the rest of us. No matter what he seems to keep one, blue shoulder stiff for whoever wants to cry on it. But I'm being poetic, and trying to keep my head going in a straight line.

It gets to the point where I have to pass Sasori's house, which for an outsider, even then you might not enjoy it. It's darkly painted with a tattered set of wildflowers on the frontyard.

The top roof has a flat spot, where Chiyo would stand on and yell for Sasori to get his sorry ass home. I'm currently reluctaintly picturing the inside of the house dusty from not being in use since Chiyo decided to move into Sasori's Hospital room.

But, worst of all, there's a black carcus of a car the state pulled back to it's owners house. There's not a piece of it left, just the charred skeleton. They'd lost control of it and it plowed into the only tree on that long, annoying road. _Apparently_ they got out before the car blew up.

My mind tryed to process the thoughts of what Sasori's last pre-comatose moments were. I jogged the rest of the way and rapped on Kisame's door.

-Later

"Konan, you sure you're okay?" Kisame asked me again when we got to the School's. I turned dead-pale after passing Sasori's house, and I guess I haven't colored up yet.

And I'm sick to my stomach, Kisame practically lifts me off the bike. "Yeah, just tired. But thanks again, Kisa. You can go now."

"You don't a ride back?"

"I'll find something. You go on ahead." He studies my expression for suicidal thoughts, then he reluctaintly kick-starts his bike again and drives off.

From what I understand, Principal Tsunade has a condo built behind the school. But I go into the store first. I don't have any money to spend, this month I gave it to Yahiko as an Akatsuki activities fund. Last months' was lost on numerous bets with Hidan, Kisame and Deidara. Deidara got a hat, Kisame bought us all Dinner, and Kakuzu conviscates every penny Hidan picks up off the side of the road.

I just go inside to check myself in the mirror. Upon looking I'm tempted to finger some makeup and try and color my cheeks. I stand there, ignoring the impatient looks from the clerk. And try to will some pink into my face.

After about ten minutes, where I at least convinsed myself I no longer looked like a zombie, I exited and tryed to look around and make sure I had proper directional skills.

Going around the post-office, there's a dirt road lined with actually really cool-looking trailer homes. And occational oversized one that looks more like a condo. I look for the mailbox reading Senju.

It's on a painted mailbox. On closer inspection, the paint looks fresh. Probably done by Tobi actually. Another thought enters my head and I growl it away.

This one isn't a oversized trailer, it's a honest condo. Stone walkway and cement driveway that's covered with pastel rainbow chalkmarks. It's perfectly behind the school and on a forced humorous thought I imagine Tsunade crashing in on any attempted test-stealers.

Suddenly, and quite conviniantly, my legs turn to jello and even thinking of walking up there is like doing what you're supposed to do to get out of a nightmare. Then I wonder if maybe this plan is alittle too conviniant, and that once it's done, I get to fall back into depression.

Or worse, the depression goes away, along with all the hope I have left. But, home is ten miles away, and the nearest toilet I currently want to puke in _is_ in Tsunade's, suddenly very scary house.

Or maybe the pinkness is just giving the effect of fear. But my legs start moving without me telling them to and I force myself not to stop again. Yup, all much too melodramatic.

Eventually, I just had to arrive at the door. It's dirty white, and screaming at me 'TURN AROUND TURN AROUND TURN THE FUCK AROUND!' but I didn't get this far listening to the inanimate objects yelling at me. I wonder if they talk to the others? I swear Deidara was at least talking to himself once.

I blink and choose to stretch out my hand and knock on the door before more convinance comes my way and someone opens it themselves. Then I heard a screeching sound that kind of reminded me of Chiyo's voice. A couple minutes of me singing nursery ryhmes I didn't remember remembering, and the door opened.

Thank gawdz I don't have to face Tsunade. Tobi opened the door, wearing his cute little hat and a matching orange longsleeve. I'm also surprised he had black jeans in his wardrobe. But combined with his other features he looks like a bi-shonen Halloween decoration.

"Ko-Chan!" He yells after registering it's me. And all thoughts of a scary Halloween decoration evaporate. "What're you doing here? I was going to play twister- but it's kind of hard with only one person isn't it?"

I blink, hey, reality can be unrealistic. "Um, yeah, it's pretty hard."

"Aunty Tsunade won't play it with me, she says she has too many things that'll get in the way. " L.M.A.O. he did not just say Aunty Tsunade. "Wanna come in?"

"Urm- no, Tobi, I was actually hoping you'd hang out with _me_ for a while." Maybe I should have had Sasuke write down a list of lines for me. " Um, everyone is busy and I just kind of wanted company."

"Sure!" He gleed. He almost cutely picks a black hoody jacket off a rack. "Aunt Tsunade! I'm gonna play outside with my friend for a while!"

"Try and be back by Dinner," I hear Tsunade's surprisingly civil and relaxed voice echo from somewhere inside. Tobi puts the jacket on and steps outside with me.

"So where are we heading?" He asks as we start down the walkway. Having someone beside me strengths my legs and my goal.

"Um, we can just walk and talk. Just something to do." I try, then I notice I remind myself of someone. Of my Mom, talking to me... when I was four.

I realize we're heading for 'the road' yay. Ten mile walk again. And no Akatsuki to make every moment seem like a TV episode. Just a hyperactive orange thing with a cutsy attitude and possible ADHD.

"So how's your friend doing?" He asked just so innocently I could cry. You just had to ask you idiotic pumpkin boy.

"Fine, Tobi... Fine as can be,"

He cocks his head. He's now walking backwards infront of me. "Are you sad? He'll be okay."

I must of sounded too grumpy, but regardless of better thinking I spat out right after him- "How do you know?"

"Because if he has so many friends waiting for him, he wouldn't be mean and just leave you guys alone." Then a thought hit me, maybe Sasori's just sitting in the convines of his subconciousness watching out his mind screen laughing at all of us worrying about him. It sounds likely. Or not.

But Tobi has that sweet optimisim that most of the time keeps you from yelling at him. Almost in a charming way. Kind of like how Madara's charming no matter how much of a jackass he acts like. Yup, they're related.

Looking around, some trees are changing colors. It's barely even Fall yet though. Yahiko told me once that it really rarely snows here. But that I did get here one what was one of the driest seasons on record. Usually it's raining alot.

I guess if my life was really cliched every sad moment would include rain falling on my head. _Heartfelt conffesions in sparkling rain._

That was recited to me by Deidara almost two months ago. Why do I keep thinking about Sasori? dammit, dammit, _dammit._

"Kooooo-Chaaaaan?" Tobi cooed in my face. I'm dazing off again.

"Um, nothing Tobi, I just got lost for a second. So, how you like it here?"

He threw his head back 'umming' "...Um, there's this girl Kagura that keeps texting me."

"Don't reply to her." _Ever._

-Later

"We're here!" He yelled. However he stayed by my side the entire time, he seemed to be much, much more energentic... Much, much, much, mulch, mulch, mulch is how I feel.

"Okay... Tobi," I panted slightly. It might be alittle my fault since I didn't want to break at the tree. For, um, unmentioned reasons... "Let's... take a break, I'm alittle winded."

"Okay! relaxing is good for you." He mused. I grabbed his hand and led him forward those suddenly really heavy steps.

"We can sit down in the Bar for a while." I breathed, trying to sound casual.

Tobi cocked his head alittle again. "Hnm, for some reason Aunty Tsunade didn't want me to go to the Bar~" Well, there's many reasons kids shouldn't be in Bars, but I think that's not the point.

"Um, it's okay, I go there all the time. If you get in trouble you can blame me okay?" Yup, detentions are coming my way...

On the bright side Tobi nodds his head and happily follows me in. The place is dim-lighted as usual, with drunkards laughing and clinging to the counters. Hey, Orochi-fuck-you's even here, happy days. Sasuke and Naruto have made they're way here, I think Orochi-fuck-you's hitting on Sasuke. Or feeling nausous, hard to tell.

I try to non-chalantly lead him over to the nearest table. It's set high up and we have to hop to sit on the stools. Those settings confuse me greatly, but moving on. I'm talking deliriously. But then again I've been thinking deliriously for quite a while now. I think I used to be sophistcated, must've been the weed.

From previous experiance, I know sitting down will call for Madara to come over and ask us if we need anything. Anko doesn't ever do it and stays behind the counter, something about not leaving her lower torso open to attacks. Or something else equally deranged.

It takes a couple minutes in which I have to keep the charade and try asking Tobi what his favorite animal is, because the sent of strong whiskey has apparently made me drunk, dazed, and insanely stupid. Tobi gladly took it and recited a long list of animals, half of which I think are extinct and some I've never heard of.

Then he seemed to turn the conversation into something about clothes. I don't exactly get to wear much designer anymore- On one fateful laundry day before my life fell into the shitter, I went to school in one of Yahiko's stained tank-tops. Effectly embarressed that me and Hidan had the same shirt that day. I then begged Naruto to give me something of his, since he was wearing a tank-top, T-Shirt, long-sleeve, a vest, and a jacket all at the same time. He refused, saying he was in training for the most clothes at the same time.

I turned the conversation to Cars effectively when I started remembering the part where Deidara and Itachi managed to sweet-talk Sasori into giving me his hoodie. The only time I got to see him without it on, and he had a pretty awsome red spiderly shirt under it.

Yahiko concluded the exchange with the amazing tale of the only other one ever getting to wear the sacred hoodie being predictably Deidara, after the two ran into eachother one extreamly rainy evening, Sasori having an umbrella and Deidara having walked around outside without one for the two hours previous.

This is the part where I think of a metaphor about this. But I can't think of one. I just know that these memories are really, really sad. And I still don't want to stop remembering them. But there's that itching part, like a little demon in my head musing how if I forget it won't be sad anymore.

Well, there's the metaphor, little demons, where'd I get that? Right, I was moping on the living room couch one weekend while Naruto lazily watched a Soul Eater marathon.

I compare my current plan with Medusa's schemes as Tobi chats about- somehow the topic is King of the Hill now. And something about- Fantasy Telemarketers? what?

Madara finally got to the damned table before my brain could explode. "What're you guys doing this evening?" His features aren't showing anything, but years of being in the buisness makes him have a seemingly gentle-if-not-for-the-bored-tone greeting for everyone.

"Um, nothing, I-" I have no fucking lines to send. How was I going to do this again. Ugh, blame the little red demon in the ugly Armani suit.

"Hi!" Tobi exclaims, having stopped talking once he appered.

Please, let my work be done for me. I pray to you God, if you love me you'll give me this.

Madara looks at him. "And you are?"

"I'm Tobi~" He cooed in an adorabley polite way. He held out his stone-white hand and Madara shook it.

"Tobi!" I heard a voice, which I always hear loudly, but not with such forced enthusiasim. "Yeah you're the new kid! Nice ta' smell ya!"

Sasuke, a better actor, had a innocently curious look on his face. "You're the one staying with Principal Tsunade right?"

"Uh-huh," I feel an urge to punch Sasuke rumbling. Mainly just for him being a smart-assed little twerp.

"That one?" Orochimaru slurrs, theatricly congested-sounding. "He'sss ssupposed to be the sson of her whorey sssister. Motherfuckin' woman killed hersself lassst year."

That hissing almost distracted me, but I look up at that little twitch on Madara's wide-eyed face. Well shit God.

Sasuke planned this. He friggin planned it. I feel like an entirely diffrent-viewed and better written story went on while I wasn't here, and I was used by Sasuke more then the other way around.

Madara weaved alittle, I blink, he blinks, then I weaved. I'm looking past him, in time to see Karin come in, she pulls Orochimaru out of his stool and he downs his last gulp of water before walking a straight line out of the place.

Insert internal screaming here.

But this is what I wanted to happen, I guess I just kind of wanted to have a bigger hand in it. Like being the only one able to desipher the code on the tomb in time to reunite the two people whom in seeing eachother in such desperate sign, figure out they're Father and Son... If I ever had doubts of not being like a girl.

I sit up straight and stand. "Tobi, I'll be back in a second." I walk the short distance. "Sasuke, outside, now."

-Later

After a very stress-relieving fight that consisted of half-hearted kicks and lots of noogies. Emo Princess Sasuke crawled away assisted by a histaric Naruto as the sun began setting on this very annoyingly conviniant day.

"Your Mother was Tsuki?" I heard Madara say from behind me. I turn, he's escorting Tobi outside.

"Yeah~" Tobi mused, He looked up at the probably six-foot-something man, that actually looks extra mencing in the red light.

Madara was quiet for a few seconds. "I haven't seen her in fifteen years." I stand put, because the dramatic part of my mind tells me that if I make a move I'll draw distraction. But I keep my head half-turned, paranoid even looking directly at them will break the moment.

An extreamly exhilerated feeling, I'm almost positive that this is the clichest thing ever in history. But my life is a cliche,maybe everyone else are the weird ones for not knowing the right people.

The corner of my eye I'm useing to survey the exchange gets focused, Madara cracks a smile- the most emotion I've seen from him that wasn't sarcasim. He brings his hand up and places it on his head. I think Tobi had probably been thinking the same thing, using those chibi-sized brain cells to their fullest extent. "... I can take you home if you want, Tsunade might not like to see me. But you can't hike there in the dark."

Tobi nodded, brain cells having done their analizing and converting their use to speech. "Yeah, she doesn't" He rolls his eyes around like how he does when he thinks. "Really doesn't, yeah, really, really, really doesn't."

I turned around, climbed the couple steps to the porch. "So?"

Madara's expression was back to his usual. Glaring at me slightly through it. Tobi got the opposite reaction and grabbed my shoulders. "Konan Konan! guess what I think!"

"I have no idea." I groaned, he giggled quite giddily for a couple moments.

Madara led us off the porch. Okay, my lazy adventure is over. Now I can just go, jump on my bed and moan at my life. Mooooan.

"Hnnnh," 'That's it?' is what I say in my head. Hawt damn. "Listen, Tobi, you can leave if you want." The entire reason I dragged you away was to take the two hours to walk here and two minutes to accomplish my mission.

"But-" He started, but then he perked up and looked behind me. Down the road of the dead I never want to walk down again. "Hey! Konan lookie!"

I lookie, Kisame's bike is parked on the corner with said boy on top of it. Yahiko joggs over to me panting... Advenutre, senses, tingling...

"Konan," 'I don't wanna know,' I think as he takes a second to breath. "I just... rented the warehouse... come on over we're doing a concert..."

"Wait- right now?"

He breaths a few seconds more before finally being able to stand up straight. "I've been running around trying to get it done all day. Come on, we need something to do."

But I just did my slightly unneeded task of the day. "Who's going to come Yahiko? You didn't advertise or anything."

He raised his hand, finally being able to smile proudly. "Our fans have E-Mail, and when people hear the music they'll start comming."

I take a few seconds. Another WTF moment... No, this doesn't make any more sense five seconds later. But that just means I have no reason to object that he won't double-object. And Yahiko as a Lawyer is just a down-right scary thought. "Okay, fine. I'll come. But-"

"Tobi wanna come?" He asks, I twitch alittle, is it because I have boobs that no one wants to let me do anything? Okay, fine, I'm not the most stable right now, but at least I'm on _crazy!_

"Yeah yeah yeah!" He jitters. He grabs Madara's arm. "Canni Daddy?"

Me, Madara and Yi'ko-Kun all had the same 'did that really just happen?' expression. Madara grunted what must have been a yes rather awkwardly and Tobi jumped up and down and ran over to join us.

"Did Tobi just call-"

"Sasuke'sfault." I stammered and started franticly tugging his jacket sleeve.

-Later

Madara dropped me Tobi and Yahiko off at the warehouse. Kisame parked his bike the same time we got out. Something felt homey about Kakuzu popping his head out of the steel doors. "Is Deidara with you?"

"I told Hidan to track him down." Yahiko replied. I looked around, suddenly praying for the two maniac's to pop up.

Madara had already pulled out and left us. I inched closer to Yahiko. "Have you seen him today?"

Yahiko shook his head but answered. "In the early morning. He was just kind of straggling behind us and then he vanished. Zetsu already checked his house."

"He'll turn up," Kakuzu through in. I think he's actually trying to be considerate. And that's pretty scary. "Common, let's... Um, do something productive."

Do something productive... That's it. All day I wanted to do something productive, that's why I went on the wild-tail adventure, that's why Yahiko went through so much trouble to randomly get a concert ready.

And for some, cliche reason. The thought of coping through the rest of my life by just doing things to survive, is actually utterly freightening.

-Later

"Uggghn, but I don't _wanna_ do anything!" Hidan groaned in a extreamly comical fashion.

He'd returned from his search half an hour into the show. Without Deidara. The only thing keeping my from completely panicking is that I know he couldn't really effectively even _try_ to look. Not in his chronically lazy condition.

Yahiko did a performance, Itachi did one, Kisame and Kakuzu did a almost forcibley funny comedy act. And now the only thing we can do is give an encore for this very, very mini concert.

I can't sing, I mean, I could. But, I can't hold those amazing tunes and I'm one of those Konoha Idol auditioners that's not bad enough to get put on TV but not good enough to make the cut. Plus, I've become amazingly shy since getting 'sober'.

And Hidan isn't really in the mood to do anything. Even if he tryed he'd sound worse then a dying monkey in this state. And since one of our star heartthrobs is missing in action, and Kisame and Kakuzu can't keep carry a tune in a bucket. We have the final ultimatum.

"I can do it!' Tobi cheers quite cutely. "Can I? Pretty please?"

I understand that magically finding his Father must have made him extra hyper this evening. But... his name is Tobi. He has a unhealthy obsessiong with a pumpkin hat and he kind of looks like a vampire in the dark. I swear his eyes are fucking _glowing._

Yahiko sighs. "I'll introduce you. It's better then a repeat proformance."

Everyone did pretty okay tonight. Itachi sung a sorrowful song that really fit everyone's mood. Yahiko tryed to force some enthusiasim with his song, but no matter what the mood, Yahiko's voice and look aren't a combination that makes you wanna jump around... Okay his performance was out of characterly amazing but still. I'm stressed and I think slightly schizophrenic.

I can hear Hidan begin snoring. Yahiko goes out to introduce our newest member. Tobi grabbs my hand. "Are you okay?" He says affectionately.

I smile down at him. He's about my height but he's cocking his head again. I don't know if that's a tick or if it's part of his secret evil plan of being the cutest 14-year-old in the world. "I'm fine Tobi, now, go impress some new friends."

He smiles and scammbers away onto the stage. Yahiko hands him a mic. And I suddenly have to tightly shut my eyes and sit down.

I need medication, or _something. _When I wasn't anywhere near them, I hardly thought of the others, except maybe what Itachi might do to me for beating up his baby brother. Maybe I through myself into denile that anything else _bad _could happen.

I take deep breaths. It doesn't do much more then keep me from hyperventilating. A clicking noise catches my attention and I see something black and gold.

I ran over to him and grabbed Deidara in a hug. He just yawned. "Did you miss me? hn,"

I laughed alittle, "Shut up, stupid little... girly man thing." I had to honestly check to make sure I wasn't crying.

Kakuzu was controlling lights. Hidan was- well, he was asleep. On one of the couches. Yahiko was talking to some fans that must've lived out-of-town. Kisame and Itachi- I honestly have no idea where they are. They were here a second ago, I swear to God.

_In the cold,_

_In the cold winter._

_Under the full Moon_

_Like a Midnight sun,_

_In the cold winter._

I blinked a second, Tobi wasn't bad. He had a beautiful voice really. And I'm iffy on using beautiful for boys. I smiled alittle. Maybe I can get another miracle and everything can be okay?

I looked up at Deidara, he averted his eyes, listening too. I almost called his expression awe-struck, but there's something diffrent there.

_Underneith the stars_

_Fall asleep with my_

_hand on your heart_

_I won't let it skip a beat..._

_In the cold,_

_In the cold winter._

Deidara sat down on a free couch. I joined him thinking maybe his leg was getting tired. I looked around, I suddenly really wished I wasn't alone.

When I looked back Deidara had his head in his hands. "Dei? something wrong?" He blinked, then almost a nervous chuckle. I tapped his shoulder for attention. "What?"

He almost went to look up at me but then he turned his gaze back to the ground. "... I, I kinda had something you should know about..."

"What is it Dei?"

_Hey Love,_

_I won't hurt you_

_Night will come and go._

_I won't hurt you,_

_You'll Never Dream Alone._

"What?" I shouldn't of screamed so loud, so- _judging._ But then I hoped I could've been louder, to maybe draw someone in here with me.

"I was driving Konan." He repeated it like he really needed to. "Yeah, that's right, all of this is my fault. It's my fault Sasori's half-dead in the Hospital." He said with attempted irony.

I blinked- can't think straight, can't think straight, I get angry when I can't think straight. "Deidara, it's- it's okay. It wasn't your fault, it was an accident."

"But when Sasori wakes up, he'll hate me. My fault, playing with the damned radio. Going too damned fast. But my defense is that it's the breaks' fault, they gave out. It's his crappy cars fault."

The itching at the back of my head. I hate it.

_Dreams,_

_Dreams in a vivid slumber._

_We're connected,_

_when I hold my breath,_

_you're the only one who knows_

_how to wake me._

"... Well, then, I guess you can save your strength if he doesn't wake up." I tried to ease. But I still can't think straight. And Deidara's sounding crazy.

He finally looked at me. His bright blues looking more like stones. "He'll wake up."

I blinked, my face was heating up, I think I was almost sweating. I blinked back sadness or anger, whichever emotion wanted to come next. "... What if he doesn't?"

I almost didn't register it happening. But Deidara got up and left out the back door. No one's around, no one but a snoring Hidan. My legs yelled forward.

He'd thankfully stopped just a bit outside the door. "Dei- I."

He laughed again, he _laughed_ again. But it wasn't that jingling chuckle he always had. He turned around. " You're so pessimistic Konan."

I stared at him with probably an awed expression on my face, "Are you this serious?... Sasori-" I didn't want to be mean and say it. But looking at his lost eyes right now, I need to get it through to him. "- Sasori's. Probably going to die." And with that the anger flinched on his face. "Even if he doesn't. He'll be in a vegged state the rest of his life. Deidara come on. When-... when you love something you have to let it go." I finished. He has to understand now.

_Underneith the stars_

_fall asleep with your_

_hand on my heart_

_You won't let it,_

_skip a beat._

_In the cold,_

_In the cold cold winter._

He stared at me. With his face blank, he stared at me for a second like he didn't know who I was. "Our lives aren't like that Konan," He said

"You have to be serious Deidara... Please you can't be like this."

I looked at his bright blue eyes. And for that one second at least. I knew he hated me. "Konan, you have no idea what you're talking about." He started taking a step back. I thought a second too late about how our presious, vain, stupid, desperate baby could view things. "When you love something, you let it go... But... you... cling on... to what keeps you breathing."

_Hey love,_

_I won't hurt you_

_Nights will come and go_

_I won't hurt you,_

_You'll Never Dream Alone_

"Deidara!" He sped off to who knows where. And realized I just lost all sense of what I thought was reality.

_I won't hurt you_

_Nights will come and go,_

_I won't hurt you,_

_You'll Never Dream Alone..._

-Later

"What!"

Hidan was wide awake now, but he looked like he could have been in a trance Kakuzu, Kisame and Itachi all sprinted out the door the second I opened my mouth. Tobi, looked like he just completely deflated. He took a few steps back before falling into a chair and looking like Hidan.

Yahiko didn't want to believe me. He didn't want to believe that I just said Deidara ran off, in obvious distress and instablitity. I started choking back sobs.

I did that, I think I just did this. I think I just killed someone.

No one knows where Deidara would go. Sasori might, but he's half-dead. Deidara would go to one of us if he was upset. But we're- _I'm_ the one that made him like that.

I'm sitting down on the couch now. Yahiko pushed past me to go out the door with the others. Tobi's pulled his hat down over his face. Hidan's on my left mumbling things. Looking absolutely dizzy despite having been sitting down this entire time.

Hidan thinks it's his fault, Tobi thinks it's his fault, Yahiko thinks it's his fault, Itachi probably even thinks it's _his_ fault. But I know it's my fault, and I kind of want to start screaming really loudly right now and just cry untill I've drowned myself.

What made me say all that? I've been giving up, but did I _really_ have to take away all of Deidara's hopes now, or could it have been worse if the life support went flat while we were sitting right there?

I don't know. But it's my fault. I think I'm even blaming myself for them getting in the wreak in the first place. Maybe if I'd volenteered to stay with them that one night. Maybe, maybe.

Zetsu got here now. I see Tobi run over to him and start crying. Hidan's yelling at himself. I just go cold.

-A Few Days Later

I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed. I don't want to get out of bed.

Naruto tryed to pull me out. But he just looked so scared, like doing the wrong thing right now would break me. Sasuke seemed to have tryed something too. But when Naruto started getting upset, he got better priorities that deserved more comfort then me.

Mom always seemed to know that she has to leave me alone when I'm like this. But I've never been like this this bad before, I'm sure. So she's just been sitting in her room with her door open. Playing her guitar and waiting for me to make some sort of... Productive behavior.

I'm done with productive shit. I told Deidara his best friend was going to die for my own sake. Because I wanted to run away from everything that was happening. Everything I've been through, and I'm still nothing but a stupid, selfish, spoiled little princess.

I'm not sure how much I've slept or how long I've been laying in bed for. I haven't eaten, I haven't even gone to the fucking bathroom. I've just cried in the pillow 75% of the time, and cursed my life the rest.

Everytime I sleep it's a nightmare. I think, I just know I wake up somehow feeling worse then before.

I don't know where Yahiko is. It's killing me to think he's been away this whole time trying to clean up the mess I made. How productive that's going I have no idea.

-Later

My eyes open again. I at least know a day has passed. All the other times I've 'woken up' there was a morning light coming through my window. But now the room is dark, the sky is dark. Mom's guitar has stopped and I can't hear anything. But I can feel something, well, it's more like I can hear a presense. I can't say that I feel anything but utter depression.

I just have to move my eye around to see Yahiko standing in my doorway. I can't say I've moved my position at all. I've been on my stomach in my bed with my arms around a pillow this who time. My arms numb, I can't even feel the numb feeling. It's just like there's nothing there.

Yahiko sees that I'm awake and comes over. He puts his hand next to me to get my attention. "Konan?"

I nudged my head out of the pillow alittle. That's the most movement I've done. "What happened?"

I sound like I'm in denile, but I need it played over again. My own memories of screwing up are pretty stale. Yahiko answers me gentley. "It's Tuesday night Konan."

It's been barely three days. But I almost force myself to keep tears in my eyes. To remind me how much a screwed up. I just don't deserve any of it anymore.

Yahiko doesn't sigh, he more so breathes heavily. He sits down on my floor and puts his hand on my arm, the one I still have feeling in. "Konan, you have to get up." I blinked some tears away. I'm not sure I deserve to leave my room. "We're all still looking, can you help us?"

I've been sitting here in my bed for days while all my friends have been out- I don't know, putting up missing posters again... Sasori made those posters. Of course. Duh.

My current emotional moods aren't making any sense. My little happiness high has backfired and the littlest things are driving me crazy. But I'm losing it. I'm losing the only thing that ever managed to help me.

I tried to pull myself up off the bed. I get to slowly twist into a sitting position, Yahiko's on one knee watching me. "Konan, say something."

I make some squeeking noises just to put him off for a while. The blood rushes back into my arm in a incredibly painful prickle feeling. I can't move my fingers, so I focus on that for a while. Just focus on the pain in my arm like I'm some kind of cutter.

When I'm able to move my index finger again. I have to say something. With alittle deja vu moment. "I have something I should tell you."

I say the whole story. Almost identical wording as Deidara, but diffrent keywords. That's all. But the reactions are diffrent. I can't run away like Dei did. I don't want to. I don't want to run away again. At least that moral is fresh in my mind.

Yahiko doesn't tell me what a idiot I am either. He just sat infront of me and listened untill I couldn't sit straight anymore and I had to start squeezing the air out of him.

-Next day

I try and breath. Just breath steadily. I sob a few times. But I'm getting up.

Jiraiya already called me and Yahiko off school for the week. And there's no crying and holding my Mom either, she's still at work. Naruto's at school, and Yahiko already set out at daybreak to continue doing what he's been doing while I sit a blame myself.

I get dressed slowly. Just a blue off-shoulder shirt under a pink jacket. Green mini-skirt and I decide I'm decent enough to leave the room.

Jiraiya's locked up in his room I think. Or left. Can't blame him, I'm sure I'm not very pretty to look at.

I work my way down the stairs in a annoyingly slow pace. I try and stumble-step my way to the door to go quicker. Wow I must look pathetic. But my legs feel like rubber and I want to start crying again.

Now it's time to turn the handle of the front door, which seems like it might be harder then you'd think. I lean against the door. It's already afternoon, I've already spent too much time in my room. I don't have to run out of the house right away. Just preparing myself alittle isn't so bad.

I notice a stack of videos next to the TV. I remember hearing noise from the TV. And there's some blankets on the couch.

I try and remember something from when I was wallowing in bed, when I heard the TV. I remembered Yahiko's voice talking, and another familiar one. And Naruto laughing with someone else.

Naruto, Itachi, Sasuke and Yahiko. They've been staying down here at night. Watching these videos. While I was crying upstairs.

I found I had enough strength to get over there. Fueled by distraction curiosity. They're all old homemovies. 'Yahiko's school play' 'Akatsuki picnic' 'Deidara's evauleation' I actually smiled. There's no way that's spelled right.

Maybe written by the Akatsuki's baby himself. I can hear a squeekier version of his voice screeching 'I wanna write it!'

There's my trigger. The trigger for this weeks adventure. I have a drive, I want to get out of here. I haven't been with Akatsuki that long. I want to get a chance to see these movies, and I want the others to be with me.

Sasori or no. I can't run again. If it hurts, even if it hurts, I can't run because they're all I have...

Corny, I know. But it keeps me moving.

-Later

I made it out the door, and slowly down to the bottom of the driveway. Actually thinking suddenly that if someone sees me they may think I'm looking for a rope to hang myself with.

I'm not really sure if I have anything to do. I was just going to come down and see if I could find someone and they'd take me in as a partner in whatever they're doing.

Really loud bickering. I look up. Crap-shit.

I hide behind a length of uncut grass. Realizing how much I might have really had to do with Sasuke's grand-plan. Principal Tsunade was having it out with Madara on the bar's porch.

I peek out. It's almost funny, if I was in the mood to laugh histarically right now. Tobi's kind of awkwardly standing far, far off to the side watching.

He doesn't look too hot, He's wearing dirty black clothes, they're really eminating his mood. Okay, here's a little idea, even if it doesn't really get anything done.

I wave my hands around. Hoping Tobi will sense my hands waving before anyone else does. What? stuff like that happens, it's in the air, I think. I don't think I caused it but Tobi weaves and just really glances in my direction.

I put my finger on my lips, just cause I can imagine him screaming 'Hi Ko-Chan!'. When he understand quiet is needed, I urge him over here.

He looks back at his bickering guardians. And starts very carefully inching backwards. Then he sprints to my side behind the grass.

Getting pretty scared crapless one of them's gonna start yelling 'Where'd Tobi go?' I take the little pumpkins hand and try and stealth through the grass. We by some miracle make it to behind Jiraiya's house and under cover of the thin woods behind it to where I finally feel moderately save.

"Hi Ko-Chan!" He yells in my ear. I shush him despite probably being a mile away from anyone that can hear. "You're awake!"

A stray thought of wondering if he really thought I was dead asleep this whole time. But I shake it off. "Tobi, give me an update, what's been going on?"

He does his thinking pose. "Ummm, we're supposed to spread out and... look untill we're about to fall asleep." Either they convinced their parents to call them off, or, as I'm sure is happening in at least half the cases, have just skipped school to search for the blonde. Tobi quieted down after he finished that. And I figure he's remembering those first few minutes after I broke the news.

"Tobi!" On what I'm sure is reflex, Tobi almost answers, but I covered his mouth.

"Tobi, we're friends right?" I sound pretty damn desprete.

He looks at me before smiling huge. "Of course Konan!"

I return a smile. "Well, I want to help. But I think you can guess that if you get tied into that argument down there I'm not sure what I could do alone."

He nodds, seemingly understanding completely. "Okay, do we go deeper in the woods?"

I nodd. One of them yells his name again. Tobi catches himself and probably makes a mental note to only listen to what I say for a while. We stand up and scoot through the woods for a while.

When we made it out I was half relieved and half pissed. Cause I was getting covered in sap, but, now we're out in the open. And Tobi's hat his probably visable from Mars.

At the fork in the road infront of Jiriaya's driveway. Of going up to Jiraiya or down to more houses. I've only been there three times at absolute most. And that was only ever up to Hidan's house. Deidara's is a little whiles farther down.

All the houses are the same tiny shapes with diffrent pastel colors. And there's a painfully lack of trees after it gets to the yards. Tobi actually leads the way between two houses. We both peek out from behind one very cartoon-style.

I don't want to get caught standing in the middle of the road, my a Principal and a Madara. But I don't want a overprotective HillBilly to start shooting at me either. So I take Tobi's hand and try and skittishly pull him over to a house I'm sure about.

I stand as close to the blueish purpley house as I can. It's Hidan's, labled by a tropically clothed gnome underneith the mailbox. I'm almost positive there's alot of people in there. So I figure it'd be okay to stay near the house and duct behind something, and Hidan's parents won't mind. I'm probably the last hope they have of grandchildren.

That was almost a laughable thought. But moving on. I could almost swear I saw Tsunade wandering around the top of the hill. But I just set Tobi at a hidden spot by a bush.

"What now?" He asked hushed.

I looked around. Feeling quite lonely. I need a six-foot-tall Kisame on my shoulder right now. Then I'd feel alot less defenseless. "Let's go with," Stay right here? "Ummm..." Dammit I look like Tobi right now.

I step out alittle farther into the road. It's a dirt road. And rather deserted. And I kind of feel like a spy right now. But moving on.

I kind of move back to the side again. I can see where the smart people park their cars. Madara's black and red figure, followed by Tsunade's yellow and orange one, both get into his truck and start driving around.

We probably can't hide behing houses, too many openings where we might get caught. I rush over and knock on Hidan's door,

Nothing... The only time Hidan's house is fucking _empty._

I double-check and look through the window. No, the TV's off and a rush to the other window shows the Kitchens empty. And unless it's after midnight, if Hidan's Mom is home, I have learned, she is in the Kitchen.

I grab Tobi's hand and pull him beihnd his house. Half-hoping there's a mini-pool we can jump into.

_Knock knock knock._

I twirl around. Deidara's little sister Kurotsuchi waves at us cocking her head from behind the glass back door.

I practically lunge for the door and pull me and Tobi inside. Suddenly panting, what? this is the most activity I've had in days... Lemme alone.

"Who's after _your_ bounty?" She asks. Deidara's sister looks like a thirteen-year-old boy. And was taught by only the best in cockiness and smart-assery. Kind of makes you want to noogie her.

She's still smiling. And waiting for us to calm down. I almost thought it'd be hard to look at her. "Hi... Kuro..."

"What are you guys doing hiding in backyards?" She asks slowly. Cocking her head farther with each sentance.

"We're hiding!" Tobi exclaims. Yay. I'm still kind of waiting for Tobi to start talking in third person.

She smiles more. "How's the search goin' Tobers?" These two apparently met during the grand search.

"Konan's helping!" Kurotsuchi nodds, not bothering to state how obvious that was.

"Okay, did you try the creek? Deidara said he always wanted to learn to swim~" Learning Deidara can't swim somehow worsened my conserns for his well-being, despite there not being much water around here. But then again I hadn't realized there was a creek anywhere around here. I'm just the frantic new girl...

"Hidan went down there." He notified. "And Kakuzu went to the next town to see if he's become a famous prostitute like you suggested." I blinked... No comment on that.

"Okay, so the search continues. Monnstery and Daddy went to a theater to see a play. Is that as disgusting as I think it is?" I nodded, Tobi thought for a second. And then nodded too. Kurotsuchi took a breath and seemed to come more down to earth, as her name would call for. "He's around somewhere. Dei's too vain to kill himself before kicking Itachi Uchiha's ass at least once."

"Are you sure?" I asked, just cause I had to.

"Pretty much." She confirmed. "He'd slaughter a small herd of cows before getting upped by Itachi. I don't think he'd go that far off the deep end. He's probably in the woods pretending he's a hermit and eating bugs." She was thoughtful for a moment. "... He doesn't like worms though. I tryed to have a lunch of worms for my science project and he started throwing up... He didn't mind helping me finish the burnt-over-a-open-fire ones though!"

Okay, maybe pyschosis runs in Dei's family. Might explain the sentance I just heard and then why his Mom's sush a evil bitch.

"Okay then, We can check the woods!" Tobi announced. Although I have a hunch that's where everyone _is_ checking. That'd be the hardest place, and Yahiko's pretty good with smart crap like that. I wouldn't mind reuniting with the guys right now though.

The door knocks. Why does everything have to happen on que? Why can't there be a period where I get to sit around and wait for something?

Kurotsuchi skipps over to answer it. And I'm not really sure waht to do anymore. Tobi's looking in the yellow fridges' freezer, and that sounds more productive the what I'm doing right now.

Okay kids, and the keyword for today is 'Productive'! Can you spell that? 'P-R-O-D-U-C-T-I-V-E'...

... I think that's how you spell it. I don't know, I feel like an idiot alot more often now.

Or maybe everyone around me is just really smart. What's Tobi's IQ? Maybe he's just a crazy child prodigy.

Then my brain cells kicked in. What's Kuro doing home from school?

"Hidoid!" Said 13-year-old yelled. It took me a second to dissect that nickname.

I was suddenly flanking Kurotsuchi at the door. "Holy Hell it's alive!" Hidan yelled loud enough for Kurotsuchi to bust a gut. I growled slightly and pulled him inside the- what I'm noticing is a very yellow- house.

"Hidan." I said sternly.

"Good God don't eat me!" I groaned and rolled my eyes while Kuro fell to the floor.

"Be serious Hidan! I'm out of my funk! give me an informative update!" I just asked Hidan to be informative. I'm an idiot. I need a genius, like Yahiko, or Itachi, or Einstine.

Sasuke would even do right now. Because then I'd also have something to punch. "Okay, uhhh. Dei's gone AWOL, okay?"

"I know that much!" Benefit of the doubt though, I didn't think Hidan knew the definition of AWOL. Maybe he heard it from Kakuzu... I don't really know why Hidan seems so stupid to me. He _is_ in his proper grade. Maybe it's the jumping out of windows thing I've heard about so many times it's like I was there.

I take a few breaths. I've been having alot of breathing problems lately, maybe I need a breast reduction. Or does that not really effect you at all? Maybe it's just lung cancer. Tobi pops up by my side. "Hi!"

"...Orange thing..." Hidan declared. "... Yum..."

-Later

Kurotsuchi was entertaining Tobi with stories that she claimed might help them find Deidara. Which started with one about Deidara and a 'fateful Shampoo bottle' and from what I heard ended with the missing blonde crying himself to sleep...

I tryed to have a intelligent conversation with Hidan. Which was working better then I'd thought, but maybe it's because Kakuzu's not next to him being a genius. "So you haven't found _anything?_"

"Not nothing." He moaned, sounding dissapointed. "We found a little black thingy that might've been part of his shirt."

I blinked. And raised an eyebrow. "Where'd you find that?"

"...Um, on my roof."

"Why would Deidara be on your roof?"

"... Well... it was the last place I would check. And they always say to check the last place you would look. And... Deidara's had some fights with my roof, so why would he want to go there?"

I didn't want to ask how Deidara could fight with a roof or why he would hate it more then he does Itachi. So instead I tryed, "... You know why they say something's always in the last place you look?" He cocked his head. Head cocking is getting very obnoxious to me. "Because why would you look anywhere else after you find it?"

Hidan seemed to have a moment of revelation. "...Wow, you're like' a decendant of God... or, Satan... or the Alien that dropped a comet on us or whoever created the universe..."

"What?"

"I have many arguments with those people." He said as-matter-of-factly. And I kind of felt like twitching, but no time to question Hidan's religon right now.

"Okay, well, is there a meet-up point for when you're done for future refference?" Wasn't I drooling into my pillow half an hour ago?

Hidan cocked his head- ohmygawd I want to kill him. " Uh, well we all end up back at the Bar."

I'm scared of the Bar. Maybe I can just have Tobi deliver the message that I did infact contribute. Even if it was never really to the searching part of the mission. "Okay, so, what were you going to do now?"

"Uh, I was gonna ask Kurotsuchi if she had anyother ideas."

"Kurotsuchi is telling Tobi a story about Deidara's relationship with Giraffes right now. And despite her being the most cool and collected out of everyone. I don't think she has a better clue then any of us right now."

Hidan kind-of rolled his eyes and sunk back into the couch. "I tryed ya' know."

"You tryed what?"

He fully rolled his eyes and groaned. "I looked when he first dissapeared. I dunno what it is, but that brat's a genius at hide-and-seek. I looked high and low for him all that day. Then I give up and he just comes out of nowhere."

He actually sounds really sencere. Not the time to mention that they'd been in the same room while Hidan was sleeping. "You did what you could Hidan, I know you did."

"Whiney little pyscho brat." I mumbled leaning his chin on his hands. "Got me out of school though."

I sighed. Me and Hidan sat there for a couple minutes, untill Kurotsuchi hopped back over to us. "Hey, the parents will be back soon. Time ta' high-tail it."

"Thanks for the help Kuro."

"Ah' not a problem. I don't get to talk to people much anyway." I stretched my arms. About several things cracked. Don't feel so uptight anymore.

When we got outside, and a safe distance from the house for incase the parents get here sooner then soon. We stopped to collaberate. "So, pumpkin, did she give you any ideas?" Hidan asked first.

Tobi didn't even assume his thinking pose. He just blinked and said: "Nope."

"Well then, what do we do now?" Everyone shrugged. I covered my face and let out a low moan.

"This means the Bar is the next destination."

"Okay," I sighed, straightening up. "Nothing else to do. Let's get drunk."

-At Akatsuki Bar

Does it sound stupid that I forgot all refference to the Akatsuki group and Akatsuki Bar?

I feel pathetic. But enough of that. We got inside, Anko's manning the counter. A bunch of people I regonize as people I don't know. Some rowdy kids at school playing pool. But I can see Karin sitting in a stool.

"Karin?" I pointed at her. That kind of sounded stupid.

Moving on.

"Hey, how's life going?" She mused. Looking really bored.

"Chaos, you?"

"Steriotypical." She declares. "I'm waiting for Daddy to finish spewing out Breakfast and Lunch in the toilet so I can take him home for Dinner." She looked up when she saw Tobi. He might blend in with this lighting. "Maddie's kid. He's hunting you."

Tobi hung his head. "I needed to do something~" He whined. Sounding pretty ashamed.

"You can blame it all on me Tobi," I told him.

Anko pulled herself up and sat on the counter. "Don't worry about it. Madara's the kind of jackass that spoils his long-lost kids."

Karin hopped off the stool when the bathroom door swung open and Orochimaru trailed the wall out of the bathroom. No theatrics today, Orochi-fuck-you's hammered. I should write his name on my wrist so I never call him that accidentally in class. Or infront of Deidara.

When we find Deidara. Try and be positive. Pessimisim got you into this mess.

Karin waves at me as she passes by with her drunken Father on her shoulder. He starts singing and I suddenly hope Karin owns a set of earplugs... Dammit Orochi-fuck-you's the perfect nickname.

When she opens the door and it swings shut I spot a few familiar faces. "Hey, Hidoid, Tober's. Outside."

My current sidekicks followed be unquestioningly (Well, Hidan complained about the apparently over-used nickname) outside.

"Hey Itachi-Kun's nice to see yous~ how're you treatin'?" Orochimaru cooes as he passes our star heartthrob to all ages and genders.

Itachi politely smiles and waves him off as the singing teacher stumbles away. "Konan, you're back. Very happy to see you."

I didn't see the big blue mass so I screamed alittle when I got picked up and squeezed from behind. "We still love you~"

After being put back safely on the ground and getting my sudden onset of vertigo done with. I stammered. "Nice to see you~ How you treatin?"

Tobi laughed and clapped his hands. Where as I think Hidan's suffering from a case of LSS. Lost-Seme-Syndrome. But he hasn't started crying like Deidara yet, just looking extreamly awkward.

Wow, gay jokes have to stop. Cause I'm pretty sure if I drew up a charter it'd confirm all of these guys would have flirted with me at least once. Well, except Itachi, so Itachi might be gay. Or just inhumanly decent, which is the less likely option. Then there's Tobi, but he's only been in town for half a week, so...

When my vision comes back from spider-vision. I can look around. Two members with terrific stamina arrive coming around the bend from the road of doom.

When Yahiko looks up and sees me it's like he just got the breath knocked out of him. "Konan?"

They jog the rest of the way over to us. Yay, me and Hidan reunited with our Seme's. Semi-happy ending. "Yes?"

"You're back." Like I've been gone for two years. He sounds really out-of-character. "I- uh, umm... am happy."

"You look so cute when you stammer Mr. Metal." I think blush creeped up his colorless face.

He blinked a couple seconds before walking to behind me. By now Kisame and Hidan were laughing-out-loud. It doesn't substitute the missing voices. But this is all we can do for now.

"TOBI!"

Said boy jumps, he looks over his shoulder to the two people he's currently going to get tag-team spanked by. "Where have you BEEN?"

Tobi turns back to us, I couldn't discribe what his eyes showed in those few seconds, but I think it was the secret to stopping world hunger and global warming.

He twirled around to face them when he was done scheming. A total of 1.7 seconds. I then heard the weepiest sentances I've ever thought could come out of a mouth.

"I had-ed to g-get somewhere safe~ I didn't like all of th-th-the yelling it was hurting me! I'm really really sorry I just didn't know what to do!"

Madara and Tsunade both blinked in union as this registered. The demented red eyes were just too _cute_ to be lying, is what their minds said.

"Tobi honey it's okay- here we won't fight anymore st- stop crying!"

"Common bud, I didn't do anything! I just couldn't stand there I'm- uh sorry it's all fine and dandy now right?"

Tobi continued to weep as the two suckers beckoned him over. "Y-you pwomise you won't yell anymore?" Did he just say _pwomise?_

They both ferociously agreed and made little amends. "Of course of course it's okay Tobi!"

He took a moment to probably give a heartbreaking tear-stained smile. "Canni say bye to my friends?"

"Of course! and then we can all go back home and talk about this okay?"

"O...K?" Madara moaned agreement with Principal Tsunade. Apparently dreading the thought of 'compassionate communication'

Tobi twirled around and returned to us. "Thankies for the help guys!" He cooed. He came up to me and-... kissed my check. "Thanks for all your help 'specially Konan-Chan!"

He returned over to the grownups as I blinked, and I felt heat on my back from where any of the guys that might be crushing on their only girl-friend were fuming... Okay, Tobi's been put on the charter.

Yahiko came up to my side after Tobi vanished into Madara's truck. "Yi'ko?"

"Yeah?"

"That was actually kind of scary."

"... Yeah," Note to self, think twice before turning to puddy by something Tobi says. It might be an assist to his world domination plans.

"I feel like I need a bath." As Madara's truck pulls out, a Van pulls in.

"Hidan is that your Mom?" I turn to look at him but he seems to be _behind _Kakuzu. As the Van passes Hidan jumps on the back of it and then shimmys over to a window. A loud screech as he climbs through it.

"Goodbye Hidan." Kakuzu growls sarcasticly as it goes down the hill.

Yahiko turns to address those present. And with the absense of so few I kind of notice we're not such a big group after all. "Well, no one's found anything. We'll start again tomarrow when we wake up. Current sleeping arrangements?" He asks.

Kisame raises his hand. "Itachi, something I need to talk to you about."

"I'm at Kisame's tonight." Itachi comfirms.

"Goodnight." Kakuzu turns around and stomps his little feeties away to pout that his boyfriend ditched him.

"Konan?" Yahiko says. Yeah, the group is too small now. And everything seems too normal, like it was better to be drooling in my pillow.

I smile faintly as me and Yahiko go up the suddenly really steep climb.

-Later

Please, God, if you love me. You'll make something _productive_ happen...

Nothing's happening.

Laying in my bed I started sifting through my drawers. Looking for something to do or look at... I found the wrong thing.

I'd sworn Sasuke'd kept it. But actually it seems the mini-Uchiha boy had snuck in here with Naruto and put it back. The old 'People who want Sasuke back' petition I'd made up spur-of-the-moment. I looked up and down the first page. But then I couldn't take my eyes off one in the middle.

In way-too-pretty cursive, 'Sasori Akasuna' jumped out at me like a crazed cat. I touch the name written with charcoal, it smudges away gently. It's too soft, too fragile... It feels exactly like Sasori's hands in the Hospital room, when I tryed to hold his hand.

I'd wanted him to squeeze it like in the movies and on TV. Show some sign he was there. And now I guess I'll be crying myself, patheticly to sleep again tonight.

But I don't want that, I can't _stand_ that. It's not bad to want to forget how much pain I'm in right now.

I have to get up and leave my room. I try to calmly woosh past Naruto and Sasuke comming up the stairs. (Maybe I could go back to blinding worry with anger again. I still haven't gotten over Sasuke's runaway-fit. No, no, too tempting. Too tempting.)

I feel them peer at my back for a second but I continue on to outside. I try to take a deep breath of the outside country air. Well, I don't feel like crying as bad now...

I start to calm down alittle more. I close my eyes, and I feel how tired I am. I just want to sleep a full night for once. This is the kind of thing I was running from with that bitch Kagura. And if she wasn't such a steriotype meangirl, I wouldn't really mind going back.

I'm calm, yes, calm. But falling asleep standing up on the porch isn't going to be very good for me or those around. I open my eyes.

I blink a second, then a couple times. I rub my eyes clean, that's not what I'm seeing. A gold blob getting closer to the porch.

Oh God, oh God, oh God. Oh thank you God. Deidara...

He's mostly visable now, walking far too slow and too still to be a Deidara in any right mind. I rush down the steps to his side. I take his shoulders and I go over to sit him down on the porch. The moon illuminated his spot and I could finally see his face.

His blue eyes narrowed to the ground and thick lashes covoring most of them. His hair was down and cuddleing his face. A baggy denim coat he held tight around him was all I could make-out of his body. He was dead-pale considering his usual color and was this close to the fetal position. "Deidara?"

His eyes flickered alittle. I looked hard at his painful face, there was a black n' blue mark on his left cheek, "Dei what happened?"

His eyes didn't move this time at my voice. But after I repeated the question and a few seconds passed his eyes lifted up just barely. Only enough so that I could see that very instant where all the life drained from them.

It started out as alittle squeek- then like a gasp. His head started to bend down and with a deep breath he began screaming non-stop at the very top of his lungs

-**End Chapter**-

Yayayayayay... 'Never Dream Alone' is owned and sung by Ashlee Simpson...

Okay, so, as for the beggining half, that Soul Eater refference came from me watching marathons of Soul Eater everynight for the past four days. Oh, and, for those whose brain almost exploded. King of the Hill's racier episodes are featured on Adult Swim, and on the Adult Swim website there's a game called Fantasy Telemarketer. That, my friends, was a dissection of one of my random jokes. Explaining anymore would take all my- extreamly large- freetime. And beddy-bye time is nearing.

But also to note: In 'Before the Savior Call' the sequel/prequel to this will most defintely include this chapter from Sasuke's POV. The: "entirely diffrent-viewed and better written story went on while I [Konan] wasn't here," XD wow, Sasuke's POV. I'll have to gain a few IQ points before I can attempt that. Smart-assed little twerp.

So originally, the part where Deidara leaves was supposed to be a cliffhanger. But Deidara returning was a bigger cliffhanger. And I couldn't seperate them so I had to move things around a bit . So this was techinically two chapters in one! (You can tell too .)

Oh, yeah, and. MY 16TH BIRTHDAY IS COMMING UP ON AUGEST 25TH!

...My Mommy and Grandmommy... are going to throw me a Japanese-style Sweet Sixteen... I AM DOOMEDED!

XD I had to beg them not paint my face Geisha-syle. I'm being talked into weird hairstyles, my Grandma's making a Kimono, GAH!

But worst of all, it's the evil age! 16! EWWWW!

On the bright side, I get to blast Naruto-Seiyuu songs through the speakers.

Hmmm, Itachi's Seiyuu singing Birthday Girl... I might not mind wearing the inaccurately fashioned Kimono.

...Okay, next chapter will hopefully be up soon. It will probably be short, unless I can come up with some awsome filler. And once again, chapter 16 will be delayed due to research gathering. If my sissy Heather will let me play anything but Guitar Hero and Kingdom Hearts . But now she seems to be obsessed with Final Fantasy X-2 that I RENTED!... GAH!... HEY! THIS IS A RLY LONG CHAPTER! YAY!


	15. Lifestyles of the Eternally Fleeting

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Naruto, or any other of that awsome crap Masashi Kishimoto dreamed up. Why does everyone keep putting down Kishi-Kun?

Ugggh, at the time I'm writting this. I had decided to not wake up untill 5pm. (I'm spoiled so Mommy didn't wake me up) Gah!... And I think I dreamed of Hidan in a circus... And then something about video game pirates, elementally powered children in a toy store, and radiated murderous teen girls... What a wonderful dream to start off my routine of writting down my dreams! ^_^

Anyway, I've been thinking about my next fanfic. And, hmmm. Who's up for a close-to-plotless story, featureing the Akatsuki from ages three to eighteen? Maybe I could call it Chibi Akatsuki... That's actually the story that I'm trying to make into a doujin, but, I also want to make it a fanfic~

Let's see, it starts with the Akatsuki ranging from ages 3 & 7 (Dei youngest and Kaku oldest) and goes up untill they graduate highschool, so they'll start as toddlers, go up to children, then to tweens, then teens, ending with ages 14 & 18. Then a epilouge that can finally introduce my OC's the Akatsuki Alternate-Universe Children.

I have such uncreative names for them, Exti, Ryo, Mizuge, Sunako, Nevaeh, Nagato(the 2nd), and Bon-Bon... XD I fail.

Anyway, At this point I needta' color my entries for the fair. Oy, one picture is a combination of most of the OC's I've created. One I remember making quite a long time ago, and I broke the number one Anti-Mary Sue rule, she was Kakashi's daughter... My current common sense forced me to mentally delete her inherited Sharingan. GAH I fail...

Other characters in it are, My evil OC twin sister Barbra, my sissy Heather, my OC daughter Cindy, Barbra's daughter Cynthia blah blah blah, from my Sonic the Hedgehog fanfics, Rouge and Knuckles' children Mi and Nicky, Fang's girlfriend Denise, From my Klonoa fanfics- Guntz' Mommy Uzi, from Case Closed/Detective Conan- Jimmy Kudo's little sister Dora, and from my Naruto ficcies- Deidara's daughter Exti, Kisame's daughter Mizuge, Hidan's bestest friend Chevonne, and Itachi's girlfriend Kyoko...

It took me untill I started coloring it to realize all the OC's were girls XD But, at least only 50% percent of them were Mary-Sue!... I think... I should take a quiz for some of them . I didn't put Kakuzu's daughter in it, I almost did. She's my favorite Naruto OC, and she's supposed to be adopted for an heir, so I didn't have to worry about making her look too much or too little like her parents... Which was the problem with the other Akatsuki's children. Konan's daughter Bon-Bon is a failed re-color of her with fancy hair. . But, it's actually supposed to be a running gag that Deidara's DAUGHTER looks EXACTLY like him... But my entries are gonna be my pictures: OC montage... Akatsuki at the Bus Stop... Artemis Fowl character group... Lady Mizukage on a mission... Tithe, Valiant and Ironside character Cafe... and, um, what was the last one?... uhhhhhh, crap... I think it was something Naruto... ummmm... poopy, I forget... (Runs off to find entries) ... Ah yes! My rly old picture that was the cover for my imaginary Naruto Dating Simulation game! Date Sakura, Ino, Hinata or Tenten! Because their boyfriends were killed in war! If you're lucky, you might be able to unlock the elusive Karin!

I fail, XD Okay, as for my Sweet 16 update... Mom insists we get her boyfriends, brothers, wife, as translater for when we go to the Asian Market for stuff to make my Dango and Anko paste .. And the party list suddenly doubled to about twenty people... Whaaaa! But I don't LIKE social interaction! THAT'S WHY I WRITE FANFICS AND MAKE INHUMANLY LONG AUTHORS NOTES!... Anyway, time to start what's going to be a painfully short chapter, oh noes!

-**Lifestyles of the Eternally Fleeting-**

Deidara's gone.

Everyone came outside when they heard the screaming. Mom tryed to calm him down, tryed to get him to breath, But in the end all she could do was hold him still so he didn't hurt himself. I just had to soothingly talk to him, but he wasn't listening. It was like a tantruming child covering his ears and _screeching._

After what felt like hours of unrelentless screaming, although it could have only been a few minutes. Yahiko had to call Emergency to come get him. They had to literally drag him into the back of the Ambulance before driving off.

The ringing was still in my ears. By the time the car was gone half the town was in our front yard. Naruto was trying to get me to snap back to life when I saw Kisame and Itachi comming to my side. I didn't really _see_ them though. This was after reviewing what happened infront of my eyes after my mind cleared.

Hidan must've stopped to collect Kakuzu, because they came up together a couple minutes later.

Karin was here in a couple minutes too. Kurotsuchi came, just in the corner of my eye I could see. Yahiko must've said something, because everyone got really grim.

But I can't hear any of it. I still hear the ringing of sirens and Deidara's voice.

-Next Day

That was a dream, that was a _dream,_ that was a dream. Please let that have been a dream

I'm in my bed again. But I don't remember walking here. I don't really remember anything. It's too vivid right now.

I try to relax. If it was a dream, I'm going crazy, no problem there. If it wasn't, then I need my strength to start crying again.

Or else I'll start screaming... It couldn't have been a dream, I remember Deidara's nails digging into my hand. I can _see_ it too. On my left hand, four dark red cresent scars between my thumb and index finger. Fresh blood still damp around a few.

A chunk on my middle finger too. From his thumb scraping it. It wasn't a dream. I'm still in my clothes, Sasuke and Naruto are asleep on/near my chair. The sun's up like nothing happened last night. But it did.

Of course he shows up _after_ everyone stopped looking for the day. And arrived at _my_ doorstep when I was the only what who wouldn't know what to do.

Mom's not working tonight. Which explains why she's in the doorway. She tip-toes over to my side careful not to stir my watch-boys.

"Honey? how you holding up?" She asks, trying to sound normal in a whisper. Trying to help me move on from the torture I had last night.

I have to think for a minute. I'm not sure what emotion is really bugging at me right now. I almost feel betrayal, but it's not Deidara's fault his mind unraveled and snapped. "I think I'm fine." I try and push the conversation away from me, I'm not the only one that's probably going through Hell right now. "How's Yahiko?"

She trys a smile. "He's just worried about you baby, come down stairs and we can see what's going on."

I realize it's my curtains making the room dim. I'm still in my clothes- shit I already thought that. I sit up and take a few breaths. Mom goes over to my chair and shakes the boys awake. Naruto, who was half on the floor, snapped up the second his eyes opened. "Konan!"

He scurries over to my side and you kind of have to smile at him. His bright yellow long sleave with a blue swirl pattern is almost glowing to my eyes.

I stand up, I don't like worrying little Naruto, he's amazingly sensitive for being a crazy, stubborn little twerp. I pull him off his knees with me as Sasuke gets up too. "Come on guys lets head downstairs." Mom beckons, leading the way out my door.

My mind wanders around my pretty colored room. Which makes me want to think of Deidara, but Naruto pulls me outside before my thoughts can get too angsty. We clatter down the stairs and the sound just seems too normal.

Going downstairs, it really is bright outside. It must be early morning, but there's a happy part, because everyone in the room has a sense of gloom that let's me know we're not just going to forget and run away from this. Let's just hope I can stand still too.

Itachi and Kisame are both still here. Itachi perked when Sasuike came down the stairs, he's sitting in a loveseat. Kisame just stopped in his tracks from pacing behind him. Yahiko and Jiraiya are sitting on the couch, thinking about something you can tell.

Kakuzu's even outside, leaning on the doorframe although the screen door is shut infront of him, which kind of makes me figure Hidan's here somewhere too. We reach the bottom of the stairs, and I immidiantly take a place standing behind Yahiko on the couch. He turns to address me and confirm I'm really here.

"Konan, you're awake."

"I've already slept enough, so-..." I really don't know how to start the first conversation after last nights events. "...What are we doing?"

Yahiko turns back and does something like a grunted sigh. "We've talked about it, we went for a coin-flip option. If you're not awake by the certain time, we were going to hang around a mope all day. And business tomarrow."

"And I'm awake, so?"

I can hear him smirk in that ironic way. "We'll go to school. When we're out, we'll figure out what the hell goes on next."

I can hear Hidan's chuckle from somewhere outside, hidden where I can't actually see him. Naruto's absently playing with the end of his shirt while Sasuke's joined Itachi. Jiraiya, for the first time I've known, is quite silent. And Mom has her hand on my shoulder. I let out a loud, almost annoyed sigh. "Okay, well, I didn't do my homework at all. So how screwed am I?"

-School

Hidan's quite tearful Mother agreed to give us all a ride to School since getting ready had made us miss the bus by mere minutes. Hidan flipped through radio stations in the front seat while his Mother only half-heartedly scolded him for listening to such violent music.

Not much cheer, but it wasn't totally mind-blowing depressing like usual at least. Itachi talked to me about some things we're doing in class so that if I fail, I could always try and ace a make-up test and blame everything on puberty, as Kisame noted.

Puberty aftershock usually stops around fifteen, but Kakuzu came up with blaming the scientific point that teenagers are stupid because the part of their brains that makes decisions isn't fully developed untill twenty-two. But then again he began explaining scientific ways of how wrong that all could be after Hidan pointed out that Kakuzu is still only eighteen.

We got there early enough to rush to class. Tobi was waiting infront of the main doors for us. Yahiko had called him about the news, but him asking about the details of what happened was actually seemingly more comforting then it was sad.

In the Hallway we all split up to go to our individual classes. That was only when I really started feeling dread, when we seperated and the happiness high of being together, as much as possible was gone.

Even Naruto alone could do _something_ to cheer me up. But he's in the next building. And I instaintly knew I wouldn't be able to really function in Gym, Art, Science or Homeroom. Not even just because of Sasori. It was depressing enough having all those classes with a zoned-out Deidara a few seats away. But it seemed so much worse having no Dei at all. That was just scary enough to cry at.

-Later

I was never really told _why_ Art was ironically not scheduled, or that we'd get an extra-long recess. Not that I can complain. I'd have died if I saw the two empty easels next to me.

"Yi'ko," That nickname gets more endearing the more I know him. "do you have a plan?"

He knew exactly what I was talking about, but he avoids it none-the-less. "About what?"

"How we're going to function now that we're down two of our members." Two of our most personalitied and idioticly endearing members.

He looked at me for a few seconds probably thinking 'thanks for asking bitch' before averting his eyes and sighing. "I don't know. It was all bad enough before."

"Before Deidara went crazy." He almost smiled at that blunt truth. But it was a sad kind of smile that usually comes with crying.

"Tobi's pretty upset." Was his only reply.

"I know, he's not giggling." It almost seems mean that I'm not weeping right now, but I think Yahiko knows it's pretty obvious I'm faking it all.

He looks out at the recess yard. Scooping out our remaining members. I have to follow his look, Kisame and Itachi are by the swing set, talking about nothing again. The sad smile is on Itachi's face, he's trying not to be upset about the absense of his arch nemisis. Even if that was clearly one-sided. Kisame's sitting on the swing that's too small for him and probably trying not to break it.

Hidan and Kakuzu are off to the side more. By a fence seperating the playground from a line of alley ways in the Middle School section. Hidan has his hand sticking through a hole, blindly scratching something with a piece of chalk on the otherside. Well, I'll guess it's chalk, that's what's littered at his feet. Kakuzu's leaning against the wall all bad-ass style saying something like a lecture to Hidan, but he's not even looking at him. It's just instinct for him to yell at Hidan I think.

Tobi's up by the doors, sitting on a step. Tsunade's supervising him from the picnic table she's sat at once before. Zetsu's behind Tobi, talking to him, like keeping him from drifting off to utter depression. He's probably upset too, they were his students. And him and Madara are like the adult members of Akatsuki.

Just looking at Tobi is pretty damn depressing. He lost a best friend that's he's only known for so long. I turn back from him and look at the ground. "We can't survive like this much longer Yahiko."

Another sigh. "Or else what?"

"I dunno, we'll start killing ourselves probably."

He seems silent for a minute. Like he's really wondering about it. "You think so?"

"I feel like it. Most of this is my fault."

"None of this is your fault Konan,"

"Then whose fault is it?" I snapped at him, he avoids looking directly at me.

He's thinking again. Like he wants to say something that makes sense so I'll calm down. But I'm feeling unhinged and ready to yell at anything he says. "... Nothings as bad as it seems Konan. Deidara'll-... Deidara can snap out of it."

"You have no idea what's going on inside his head right now. I don't think anyone does. The only one that could even give a possible guess is fucking half _dead."_

"Sasori-" He turned to me for a second. But he can't say anything else.

He knows he's going to die too. We're both lost in a stupid metaphorical sea of reality. I can see Tobi watching us, he's only about three feet away, of course he can hear us.

Self-conciously I look around, Itachi's watching us too, Kisame's trying not to. Kakuzu is too and Hidan's turned away from us but he's stopped whatever he was doing.

I try to take a breath. A nice, calming breath. It doesn't work very well, and no miracles happen when I open my eyes.

Actually, the opposite happens. I hear a laugh, well, a nercous chuckle. It's not Yahiko. I'm angry at myself, and I'm impulsively curious when I'm angry. I looked around rapidly to locate the voice.

On the other side of a chain-link fence, that fails to completely seperate the recess yard from the street, Kurotsuchi has her fingers entwined in the rings.

I literately push past Yahiko to get over to her. My hands almost instinctively entwine themselves above hers, now that I'm closer I can see the tear stains on her cheeks.

I can feel Yahiko behind me, comming up to see but stopping short. He's letting me take care of her. "Kuro are you okay?"

"Dad used to like him." She mumbled. "Well, he used to not mind him."

"Kurotsuchi?" She gave that tear-filled nervous chuckle again.

"He came back for me... He- he said hw was gonna take me with him... He wanted to wa-wait out untill you guess stopped being so- so." She laughed again. "So 'stupidly depressing' he said. But- but Mom wouldn't let him take me." I felt tears wanting to join hers, but I held my breath, I can't break down now, it wouldn't help her any. "He wanted to hide out untill Sasori woke up, then we could be normal again... Well, his version of normal, normally fabulous is what he likes." She leaned her head against the fence like she was remembering some fond memories. "...She commanded Dad like a dog, told him to 'get that filth out of my house'... Dei looked up at him like- like he wanted help..."

She sucked in a breath, she was getting ready to hyperventilate. I moved my hands down to cover hers. "Shhh, just breath." I sounded like my Mom. So soothingly motherly, is feels right with me.

"...D-dad just stood there a minute... b-before he whacked Deidara across the face... It-it wasn't even really hard. Deidara didn't even move. But- but... He always knew Mom hated him more then a demon. But, but Dad was always netural. He didn't care, but he didn't- he-" She let out three really hard sobs. Yahiko was behind me with a hand on my shoulder, listening. I'm sure the others were closing in as well. "... Deidara just left after that... They wouldn't let me leave with him... And then-" She couldn't talk any more after that. She started to slide down the fence, her hands clinging to the fence being the only thing keeping her from falling flat down.

And then he came to my house... dammit.

-Later

Tsunade let Kurotsuchi inside to stay for a while. Assuring that she would be calling in their parents finally now that there was some proof against their abuse

I'm alittle dizzy at this point. Kakuzu and Hidan went on to class, Kakuzu to inform our teachers, and Hidan just because he couldn't deal with hearing anything more. Kisame, being second oldest at this point was keeping us updated on the world around us. But me, Yahiko and Itachi were all kind of dazed out in the Principal's office.

Itachi had his head in his hands, putting all of this together for his own. Yahiko looked positively miserable. He's blaming himself again, even though he doesn't have anything to do with it.

I don't have anything to do with it. But I keep convinsing myself it's all my fault. Trying to guilt myself into holding it together for everybody else.

Tobi's across from us. Holding his knees to his chins, in a little wonderland I'd really like the directions to right now. Tsunade entered.

"Kurotsuchi's fine kids. Just shook up after everything that's happened." She explained. "... I can send you all back home if you want." 

"No," Me, Yahiko and Itachi all said in almost perfect union.

Tsunade sighed and Itachi took control this time. "We can go back to class now. Don't worry about us." He sat up so that he might look considerably put together.

I'd have to guess it's roughly two or one-thirty. So we'll have make the last half of Science at best. But Math with Iruka Umino will probably start with some sappy crap about the poor tragedies that have been happening to students lately.

"Tsunade, I feel alittle sick." Which wasn't a complete lie.

-Later

After vomitting the liquid pooled at the bottom of my stomach, Yahiko pulled me off to wait for Homeroom to start. Homeroom I can deal with. Just because I love Zetsu.

Bowing to the porcelain god in the Nurses room gave me time to think, well, between hacking. When I wasn't completely dazed in my worship.

Maybe we could go with Yahiko's plan. Smile our way though it untill either someone pulls Sasori's plug, or Deidara snaps out of it and gets let out of the _asylum._

If I didn't completely and utterly trust everything Yahiko said, I wouldn't have believed it for a second when he said that that was really where they took Dei. He was being too chaotic to just be handcuffed to a Hospital bed. They took him to the nearest asylum, a couple miles past this place. Figures the smallest and most isolated town on earth would also be the perfect location for a crazy people house.

Deidara's gone insane that's for sure. I'm not sure how much of it was my fault any more. There's the vain part of me saying that he's had a screwed-up life and it was going to happen eventually. He certainly wasn't ever normal. But then I'm not sure any of Akatsuki is. We might as well be an organization of crazed killers trying pathetically to take over the world. Yeah, we'd have our own uniforms and everything.

Naruto could be the good guy that kicks our asses daily. It makes a reasonable amount of sense for my graphic-novel leveled dramatic life.

Maybe I could wear a really skimpy version of the uniform cuz' I'm the only girl and that's the comic book steriotype. And maybe I really am fucking nuts thinking about my super-villian uniform while the world falls apart around me... Wonder what my abilities could be?

How about super-stotic attack? nothing can make me flinch. But my weakness is something really pathetic... Like oil, oil is pathetic.

I sound so crazy I could cry. I need to do something. Like slit my wrists, then me and Dei could be roommates.

By the time we're actually in Homeroom- I couldn't notice the transition of Yahiko pulling me out of my chair right away- I'm pretty damn dazed, and finally found the road to wonderland. And I'm very giddy to see the little pink bunnies-_ snap the fuck out of it you stupid girl!_

My rather harsh consious snaps me back to reality- my new least favorite word. If Zetsu mentioned anything about our dying classmate and our crazy classmate I didn't hear it. He's lecturing something about Science and writting things on the chalk board. Looking at everything he does to keep me focused- whenever he lock eyes with and Akatsuki member he smiles.

I feel like ryhming things in my head again-ian-ian-ian-ianianian...

I must have been pretty dazed out for quite a while. Because the clock says that it's almost ready to go home and mope for me. I'm pretty good and letting time pass by like I don't want to hold on to anything.

I liked the dazing though. The dazing distracted me from the nausa in my stomach and the sour taste in my mouth. I take a loud intake of breath. That's called a sigh, but it seems more like the first calm breath after a fit of hyperventilation.

I can see Hidan. He's actually awake. But his legs are up on his desk, and he's staring at the ceiling, waiting for it to cave in on him.

That actually sounds kind of nice right now. The ceiling caving in and then I don't have to sit here and really how out of it I am... That's not completely suicidal is it? Kind of sounds pretty logical.

Zetsu notices the clock is ticking down. So he makes his closing words. Blah, blah blah.

I can feel my head cocking pretty devilishly now. And I know I'm staring at nothing. And that I probably look like Deidara again. No, Deidara had a bit more depression. I just have complete and utter defeat.

Waiting for the ceiling to cave in...

I blink and the class is empty. I zoned out again, I only came back when Yahiko smacked his hand on my desk. "Konan can you _hear_ me?"

He sounds extreamly pissed that I've lost it too. " ... I'm sorry,"

-Back at Home

Guilt at making Yahiko's leadership situation worse kept me from dazing out too much. I kind of want to start screaming though...

Deidara screamed and then he couldn't stop... Yeah, that's a bad idea.

Yahiko bid good-bye when we got off the bus. None of that 'figuring out what next' like he'd said. Even the wise, understanding leader has to say 'fuck you' every so often I guess.

He's pulling me up the hill to the house. I can't barely notice Naruto's behind us. Then I wonder if I forgot my backpack- wait, no, on my shoulders. Yup I'm good.

Eventually, we finally make it to the porch. Yahiko turns around like he wants to say something. I can feel Naruto on my right looking completely worried. And something about the 'yeah we're screwed you wanna get up and leave too?' look that Yahiko's giving me triggers something.

I lift my hand out of his and I walk over and bang my head really _really_ hard on the doorframe three times. After I've check to make sure I didn't crack my skull I look back at him. Naruto's kind of wide-eyed and Yahiko has a very annoyed face on instead. "Are you good now?"

"Yeah, thank you kindly." Naruto sputtered out a chuckle that he couldn't hold in. Yahiko seemed to take relieve in the fact that I wouldn't get shipped off to Deidara's new house _too_ soon.

We got inside and Naruto thundered up the stairs to do something that I'm sure wasn't homework. Mom's reading the newspaper and Jiraiya's kind of just _looking_ at us.

"...Ko-Chan, ya' got alittle something." He gestures to my forehead with the hand that's holding one of his corny-joke cups.

I rub my forehead, "Gone?"

"Yeah, just alittle stray blood." He said, expression unchanging. After standing there he hustled over to the couch with Mom. Who gave a nervous, awkward smile when we looked at her.

The phone rang, loud and slightly annoying. "Naruto, I think that's your hubbie."

Naruto appered at the top of the stairs. "Buuut, I only call Sasuke. Not the other way around unless he has something to yell at me about. And I didn't put anything in his shoes today." It's so cute how he mentions nothing about the hubbie comment.

Yahiko walks over to the phone and picks it up. "Hello?"

I started over to stand behind the loveseat. I waved and Mom and Jiraiya, I probably look pretty morbid right now. Kind of like that scene in Valiant where Val introduces Ruth to her fairy-drug-high buddies.

"What? why?" I heard the voice on the phone screaming loud enough and say '_just get over here!'_

Yahiko shook like he just had a tremor. He handed me the phone and asked Jiraiya for the car keys. "Hello?"

"Konan? You need to get to the Hospital right now!" Chiyo said on the other line. A strange tone in her usual sarcastic voice. She honestly sounded scared about something.

"What? is- is something wrong with Sasori?"

A split-second of silence. "Something is _very_ wrong. Get over here quick!"

-At the Hospital

We parked the car across the street and made a mad-dash through the parking lot. Yahiko had to grab my hand to keep me steady. We buzzed past nurses and doctors and through the white-tile halls.

We stopped infront of the door. Yahiko was shaking, my hand was still in his. Or maybe I was the one shaking.

In the bed, Sasori had his arms crossed, looking at us with those apple-cyder eyes I realized I missed so much. He looked like he could have been pouting. If he wasn't panting ever so slightly. "Where's Deidara?"

If I wasn't before I was definitly shaking now. I collapsed under my feet, still clutching Yahiko's hand. Hereing nothing more after "He's okay Sori'. You're both gonna be fine."

-**End Chapter**-

BumbumBUUUUUM!... anyway...

Party... overly extravagent Kimono... Relatives I've known my whole life... several old ladies my Grandmother invited that I don't know the names of...

And Mommy wants to display my fair entries...

It's 16! what's so special about it? that it ryhmes with sweet? I'm not gunna start driving for a while because I have too short an attention span to pay attention and too bad a memory for remembering locations. I'm uber-anti-social because I believe a large amount of teenagers my age are fucking idiots. GAH! WHY? WHY COULDN'T WE JUST GO TO A MOTHERFUCKING DINNER! WHHHHHHHHHHHHHY!

... Oh, right, enough about me... The chapter, of course... (shudders to think about Mother's plan for Sweet 18th)

Hey, guess what? I only just now realized that in the very first chapter I misstyped 'Wine' Did I seriously type 'Whine'? Wow, that's embarressing. Any other epic-typos?

I remember one scene in Confessions of a Teenage Monster where it was very dramatic, I read through the part three times. But only after I posted it did I realize I called Yugito a 'He' twice XD But I also noticed somewhere, where it was supposed to say 'Bag' it actually said 'Back' O.o I think that was my brains fault... I've decided what mental disorder I have though! I think I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder!

Aside from my typo problem. I never mentioned: The scene where Deidara loses it, the end of the last chapter- was the _very first_ scene I ever came up with. Then I was wondering like: "Wow, awsome angsty, where would that fit?" And then I read-through Conversation Hearts' CrocFarm and was like: "Kewl! Now just think up depressing crap for all the other characters!"

Okay, now, after this chapter, in 17, Deidara will _finally_ take a back-seat in the story. (The last few chapters have loosely centered around him. And the part that was supposed to be Itachi and Sasuke was also invaded by the popular little blonde.) But 16, MAY TAKE a while to write- in fact. I'm gonna play Bully right now!

Action- hopefully _good_ action- will be up next chapter! What's the next thing Konan's gonna screw up? FIND OUT NEXT TIME! ON SOS: SAVE OUR SOULS!


	16. Road Trip

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else used in this story.

OOOOOOOOOOOKAY... Ow, my head hurts .

**CHAPTER HAD TO BE UPDATED** Because the site somehow managed to delete an entire sentance I had in here.

Of course, it had been the one explaining how Karin got there, which, obviously, had been a big part... I have no idea what happened, and it's actually kind of funny XD

ROFLOLMAO

-**Road Trip**-

Note to _fucking _self. That prickling itch in the back of the head calling for reality? _don't, fucking, listen to it anymore._

Admittedly, a miracle. Sasori, who as previously explained to have almost zero chance of ever waking up. Is fine, perfectly fucking fine... I never thought this would make me want to strangle him so much!

_Why couldn't you defy all logic two days sooner!_

I kind of want to shoot myself with a revolver right now. Splatter my blood on everything. Because that's how I should be. I drove Deidara, literally, to the brink of sanity, and then pushed him over the edge with a bulldozer. And now I've been proven wrong, and there's no way to tell him how wrong I was, because he's tied up in a straight jacket right now.

According to Jiraiya, king of annoying phone operators, Deidara's been thrashing around so much, they can't keep him still because the proper amount of sedatives to calm him would lead to overdose at his age. Jiraiya called back and got a gossipy operator that said something about them not even being able to check him in properly yet, and other depressing crap like he's still in his regular clothes because he won't stay still to change.

Mom said that they can't do anything harsh on him since he's a minor, he'll just be manually controlled enough to keep him from killing himself. I keep imagining a padded room. Because Deidara is most certainly the kind of person that would revert to banging a head against the wall to do the job.

Mom ran a bunch of tests herself. She says that Sasori hit his head and injured the part of his brain that controls the nervous system. Which explained the slow recovery rate he was having. Even now that he's awake he can't really feel anything. But he can move, which didn't make sense to me, but it's supposed to be his nervous system that's hurt, and not his motor skills. Which I guess is supposed to make sense.

I gave side-glares to Chiyo. 'Tell us he's awake over the phone so that when we get here we both need out on stretchers' is what I kept thinking.

"Well that's a nice happy ending ain't it!" She yelled and then cackled while standing on the chair infront of us. We're in the waiting room, the next day. Mom's checking all of Sasori's perfectly healthy vitals while me and Yahiko have been sitting here like zombies all night.

It's Sunday now, I believe. Yes, schools out. We didn't have to get called off. Jiraiya said that the rest of Akatsuki are tracking down some rides so they can get here and faint with us.

But the thing is, this is bad. This is really, really bad.

Yahiko is avoiding telling Sasori 'Yeah, Dei's in the Crazy house. Sry he's not here to annoy you.' Because you know those two really do adore eachother. And I don't want Sasori to find out Dei's bonkers, go into a corner, and write emo poetry.

I hop up when Itachi, Kisame and Sasuke arrive. Naruto's here too, but I only care about the first two. I grab itachi's shoulders and shake him. "Itachi! say something way too smart so I know I'm not dreaming!"

He blinks a few times, and I think his eyes did a somersault to re-focus. He looked at me with the dark eyes that had gray, half-blind pupils. "Um... When Sasuke was a a baby, he very cutely downed a entire pot of spagetti."

"That wasn't smart."

"But if you were dreaming would you imagine my stupid-ass little brother so cutely." He has a point, I guess I haven't hid my annoyance for his stupid-ass little brother very well. And that deduction was way to smart for me to think up.

"... Dammit, I'm not dreaming." That's a bad thing. Because I don't want to know what happens next in my life tied together with strings of bad plot developments... My eye just twitched.

"Ah, yes... Sasori's boyfriend is pyscho isn't he?" Chiyo noted slowly as she had stopped jumping on the waiting chairs. "We may have to do something about that. If he's still in the looney bin, him and Sasori won't be able to have recovery sex, and then Sasori might not heal properly."

I'm note quite sure how serious she was being about that statement. But she is the wise, all-knowing adult right now. Because Zetsu, who came here ironically right after me and Yahiko, is off getting drinks. And Jiraiya writes porn, so... yeah.

"Not to mention the poor boy will be a virgin the rest of his life. Well... I'm not sure is ass-sex counts for offical virginity loss." She crossed her arms and thought really hard about it for a while. "... Either way, I won't get and grandchildren from that spoiled little fag."

I remember one time where I'm 97% percent sure that Sasori was very much hitting on me. But I won't burst Chiyo's bubble with knowladge that her son is actually bisexual. She hasn't been able to make gay jokes in almost two months.

Chiyo raised her finger. "None the less! If we tell him his lover is in the Asylum, he'll start crying! and I'll have to comfort him and pay for his therapy sessions! NOT TO MENTION ALL THE PAPER FOR HIM TO WRITE EMO POETRY!" She screeches, and no matter how crazy it is, I'm kind of jealous of Sasori, and want Chiyo to me _my_ Grandmother.

Kakuzu and Hidan apper in my vision right as she says that. And it's kind of hilarious, because I never thought I'd see Hidan and Kakuzu giving the same expression of 'what the fuck did we just walk in on?'

"What the fuck did we just walk in on?" Hidan asks.

"So... Sasori really is awake?"

Yahiko shrugs. "Actually, he very much is. But we don't know what to do about the Deidara situation now."

"Cooool!" Tobi magically appered behind them. Followed slowly after by Madara, panting, having apparently been trying to catch up to him.

"Okay, so this is all giddily exciting." Kisame says. "But what are we going to do?"

It's kind of surprising to me that we actually seem happier that Sasori's alive then we would be if Deidara just got let out of the asylum. But I guess that's Sasori's Bi-shonen charisma. I look to our fearless leader Yahiko for the answers of life. "So? what _are_ we going to do?"

"Well, if Sasori's awake, Deidara has no reason to be crazy anymore." Sounds obvious. "And I'm not sure we can pull Sasori out of the Hospital to prove to Deidara he's alive. And, even if we could, the thought that Deidara went through so much while Sasori was napping might drive _him_ to the edge and over again." Wow, so Sasori's crazy too? I'm actually thrilled about this. I'm not a faghag, I'm a pyscho-hag. Yay me.

"So the plan is?" Itachi said, his tone saying he already had an idea of where this was going.

Yahiko rolled his eyes for a reason my attention span won't allow me to explain. "The plan is: We break Deidara out." ...Wait, _what?_

"ROAD TRIP!" Hidan yelled throwing his arms in the air.

-Later-Normal POV

Principal Tsunade Senju was getting ready for doing nothing the rest of the day. In her delux condo she had built next to the school, shortly after the founding of Akatsuki.

Because those adorable little holigans, as she often reffered to them in her mind. Were pyschotic. And she was pretty sure they had once snuck into the school and tampered with some records... While they were still in Elementry School...

She didn't want to say 'worst of all' but, worst of all, Tobi had apparently joined them. As he kept wanting to 'hang out' with them and at the Dinner table would talk nothing more then about Ko-Chan, Zetsu-San, Hid-Kun, Deidara-Sempai and Yahiko-Bozu...

Which was cause for much stress when she heard Tobi jumbling things around in his room and then run past the bathroom door, and open the front door.

She was behind him in 1.3 seconds. "Tob? where're you goin?" She said, her mouth full of toothpaste and toothbrush...

"I'm gonna hang out with Dad!" Tsunade blinked for a moment. Toothbrush still in the hanging-open mouth she watches after as Tobi climbs into the van. As it starts to drive off she smiles. Maybe Madara wasn't such a bad guy after all. Maybe it's just what they both needed to find eachother. She continues to smile as she wipes her mouth and turns around to go inside...

-Konan's POV

"Okay, I couldn't find a black ski-mask but I have a orange one and a blue one. And I was thinking that they might get scared by the orange one if they've seen Cry_Wolf."

"That's my boy." Madara mused after Tobi climbed into the front seat and emptied his backpack full of all the things he thought we would need.

This is not happening...

"It's not going to be that extravagent Tobi. This thing was voted top ten for the worst Asylums." They have a list for _best_ Asylums?

"We're really doing this?"

"Yes, Konan, we are."

Well fuck-shit. I suddenly don't want to resolve the problem anymore... Am I seriously taking breaking into a asylum worse then all the other crazy stuff we've did?

Wait, yeah, there's a logical reason why. Because this is _illigal._ And I haven't known anyone long enough to realize how necissary it is.

"We are so awsome~ We are so awsome~ We are so awsome~" Hidan sang in the seat infront of me. Dancing around in the chair.

Madara's car is painted black with red clouds on it. The work of the artists we're going to save right now... ow, my head hurts.

The inside is extra-big, there's two front seats, and the back has room for four, and then two extra pull-out seats on the backs of the front ones. So it comfortably fits our little retrieval squad.

Yahiko is trying to throw out stragedies, but no one's hearing him. Cause Hidan's singing, Kisame's moaning, Kakuzu's yelling, and Tobi's throwing out stragedies ment for superheroes with special powers. Like controling paper and magnetic charges and spitting out snakes like the people in Naruto's video games.

My head's aching, and I'm kind of hungry, Yahiko wouldn't even give us time to do crap. It's the middle of the night, and we're seriously going to an asylum... I kind of feel like crying.

-Later

"Hey, I think I saw this place in a video game once." Madara called when we pulled up. "It was called 'Happy Volts'."

The place is surrounded by a rusty chain-link fence. On the inside it looks like a courtyard with lots of shrubs and a statue of Jesus or some other guy in the middle. The building itself is big, square, and grey. Yup, perfect for a Silent Hill game.

But there's no bloody-soaked pink bunnies running around. You need those... Wow, I'm delirious, what time is it?

Snap out of it- This isn't happening. This is all one big dream. Yes, a dream. We are not really breaking into an Asylum. Our previous exploits have all been, admittedly, random, over-the-top and sometimes pointless. But this tops the motherfucking list.

"We're not really doing this are we?" I asked Yahiko while everyone was getting prepaired or doing something else equally unmentionable.

"Yes Konan, we're doing this." 

"You want all of us to get thown jail for- whatever this is?"

Yahiko sighed. "You have no idea how seriously messed up everyone here is." Actually, yes, I do have an idea. "This is something that we really do need to do."

"That's- that's just... There's not even a word for it- it's _crazy!_"

Yahiko took a breath and watched me. Like he's been waiting for me to do this.

"I can't take it!" I yell, I must sound so corny. "I can't _do this!_ I can't break into a fucking _Insane Asylum_ Yahiko!"

I'm ready to just walk back home _now,_ Maybe I can get a ride to town in one of the Police Cars that take these idiots to jail. Play the victim and if a loud-mouth member is in the car with them say they dragged me here and I had to escape.

Yahiko tries to tell me something but I just scream with my mouth closed and cover my ears.

_This is not happening. This is not happening. I never moved here, I never met these amaz- fucking ridiculous people. I'm still in my old delux apartment in the city with the mis-matched room full of crap I don't use with the alchohol bottles under the bed and cigerette stash under my make-up kits, with the old friends who wern't my friends. In the life that I considered calm, and SIMPLE._

"Ah-" I squeek after I move my hand. A papercut on my finger, from the paper flower I made. That I still have in my hair, that hasn't fallen apart _yet_ after all the sleeping on and hair-pulling I've been doing lately.

It makes me look up at Yahiko, he's not trying to say anything anymore. Just holding out his hand with gray eyes _pleading_ I come with them. And I have to take it... Because I love these fucking ridiculous, _amazing_ idiots.

And because I'm not wearing very good shoes for walking. Yeah, that's the reason. I'm not an idiot in love.

_I can't run again. If it hurts, even if it hurts, I can't run because they're all I have._

I grab his hand, I let out a exausted breath that made him smile. I look around at the display behind me... And I think have way too many people for a quiet, inconspicuous breaking-and-entering into an Asylum.

I think Hidan's imagining what he's gonna be doing. Cause he's making wooshing noises and flailing his arms around and doing jumps and spin-arounds. Kakuzu's just staring at him like an idiot. Itachi's completely calm, like this isn't going on right now, like he's waiting in line for the School lunch. Kisame's the only one with a 'normal' expression. He's giving the Asylum a look like it's a giant sumo in a tattered loincloth covered in jelly and about to glomp him. While Tobi's cheering and excited and picking Madara to talk about his happiness to...

Well, at least with Deidara back, the group will look _brighter._

"Come on, we have to find a way in." That's right. There was never a real plan. Suddenly I'm really glad that at least half of the people here are freakishly smart. But then there's Hidan...

"Found it!" I turn over, Hidan's standing next to the sign that has the name of the place on it. Kisame was grabbing Itachi's bag out of the car and waved us over. Okay, maybe Hidan isn't a weakness.

"Who's there?" I older, dumpy voice calls. By some screwed-up miracle we all manage to get behind the car before the flashlight hits us. Well, except Madara and Tobi, who have just been volenteered distractions.

After a few minutes, Tobi did his magic. "Hi sir! Me and my Daddy think we need to join you establishents!" Awww, he even mispronounced establishment, cute factor gets a A+

"Uh- yeah! what are your requirements?" Madara went along.

The guard blinked at them, "Uhh, well, I guess you have to be deemed insane."

"Really? could you deem us insane?" Madara asked.

"Hmmm, I dunno, you have to do something insane."

We all started crawling out from behind the car and squeesing past the sign into the area. Kisame streched his arm out to quickly close the car door. It shut with the natural _BANG._

"Ah!... See sir? We _hear_ things! We need to be commited!"

"Well glory me, I heard that too! Maybe _I'm_ bonkers?" The guard wondered while I figured out why this was one of the worst Asylum's.

We all got up to walk when we where covered by a giant rock and some trees. When we got to the fence part we stopped.

"What do we do from here?" Yahiko asked for suggestions.

"What's that shack thing?" I tried.

"Tool shed?" Hidan said.

"For when the crazies have workshop Hidan?"

"Whaaaat? shuddup."

"It's a control booth. I can see computer lights inside." Kisame said. I looked up- there wern't many cameras, and none could see us from where we were.

Kisame handed Itachi his bag. "I can take care of that. How do we get over there?"

In the courtyard there were three guards, all dressed in white with gloves and all. I gave myself a job to keep an eye on them while the others decided the hard stuff. "Hey, there's a hole." Maybe it's not so hard. If _Hidan_ is so skilled at it. Or maybe the big silver idiot isn't as stupid as he always is.

At the bottom of the fence, there was in fact a convieiant hole, in this convieniant passage way that for all we know was built here by the Asylum's inmates. It looked hard to get through, but not impossible. "So who's going?"

"I'll go with Itachi," Kisame raised his hand. Practical match-up. Tiny boy genius and big, beefy bodyguard. It's like Artemis Fowl or something. They both got down to get ready to go through the hole

"I'm gonna check the cameras." Droaned one guard, waving as he walked off. Yahiko pulled me over to him behind a tree when he appered from around the building.

Kisame was half-way through the fence waiting for something. Itachi was directly behind him. Yahiko covered my mouth- probably waiting for me to say something stupid and attract attention. Stupid, paranoid, pyschotic, leader, metal man.

"Mmhf!" I screamed, still muffled by his hand. Kisame jumped out just as the guard turned his back to open the door, he grabbed the man in a choke hold and rammed his head into the door. Then he fell limp to the floor infront of really, really scary Kisame.

Itachi moved on to open the door and stroll inside. While Kisame turned around and leaned on the fence infront of me and Yahiko. "Konan?"

Yahiko parted his fingers for me to speak. "Yes?"

"I just knocked out a Asylum Security Guard using a move I saw in a video game."

"Hmm-mmm." Good, someone who shares my conviction of this being totally fucking insane... He's much more skilled and loyal then me but he's also a six-foot-tall blue guy. So...

He blinked his beady eyes for a few seconds untill Itachi poked his head out the door. "All the cameras are turned off. You guys can go ahead in, we'll stay to make sure they don't get turned back on."

I don't want to point out all of the actioness from that sentance that deserves to be in nothing more then a action movie. Not everyday life. I'm starting to feel suicidal again, and not really care what shoes I'm wearing.

Kakuzu was the first one I saw come up from our right. "I have an idea."

"Does it involve death?" I meeped out.

"Depends on how much power this thing really has." He holds up something that resembles a pimped-out watergun, only strangely more mencing.

"What the fuck is that?" I shouted maybe too loud. Yahiko went back to covering my mouth again.

Kakuzu leaned slightly to make sure the guards were still doing their jobs very suckishly. Apparently so. "This is Tobi's 5th Grade Science Project. One of the things he brought." Wow, so somebody _was_ listening to Tobi.

"What does it do?" Yahiko asked, still holding my arms down and mouth shut.

"It- umm, shoots potatoes at 100 miles per hour."

I blanched, making whining noises from my covered mouth. Yahiko commented, "Try and make sure he land in a soft place."

Ohhhhhh gawdgawdgawdgawdgaaaawd...

"Weeee!' Hidan says moderately quietly, appering from somewhere behind Kakuzu. "Awsome! I brought my sling-shot too! We getta' be snipers!" I roll my eyes and Yahiko sighs.

"I'm going to stand atop the control room- uh, thing. And try and nail one guard." Kakuzu turns to the giddy little silver thing- you'd think we'd all want to wear _dark_ colors while breaking into somewhere. But I think me wearing bleached pants was part of my subconsious wanting us to get caught. "Hidan, you go somewhere, and when I give the signal, we have to try and knock the guards out at the same time."

Hidan blinked a few times. A logical thought, probably something like: How do I know someone out with a sling-shot? invading his brain. But then his usual stupidity flooded back in, or, maybe it's called optimisim. "Okay! I can _do_ this!"

_"Shhhh"_ The two elders growled. And a stray thought for me that I think we may need to buy a muzzle for Hidan the next time we break into someplace... Wow, I really did just say that...

Kakuzu climbs through the hole and Yahiko pulls me and the giggling Hidan away as I notice Itachi and Kisame drag the security guard into the door and then close it...

This is not happening...

-Meanwhile-Normal POV

"Hmmm, I don't think so, my uncle Gikikou does that too."

Madara and Tobi had come up with their plan on how to distract the security guard from his currently blank security screen and the chaos about to begin behind him.

They were currently trying to convince him that they both needed committed. Which was harder then they thought, although, it could also be that the guard was an idiot. Like all the other guards, since it seems as though idiocy was a requirement for getting the job.

But this just ment that there would be no suspision that these two seemingly insane people were trying to do something that may be illigal or semi-illigal, or even techinically illigal.

Madara put Tobi down from the boys previous position on the formers shoulders. Madara took a deep, nervous breath. And bent down to whisper to Tobi. "Kid, whatever happens in the next ten minutes. I want you to know it's desperate, and that I still love you. Okay?"

"Okay!" The boy replied.

Madara stood straight and walked over to the security man. "You're right bud, why should you bother dealing with us? For all you know, we're trying to distract you from six teenagers trying to break into the asylum, or steal your wallet." Madara picked up the wallet hanging from a chain on the mans belt.

"Oh I don't believe that. Why would six teenagers want to break _into_ an asylum?" The guard exclaimed.

"I guess that shows how crazy we are- ohhhh, hot-mama. Is that your wife?" Madara looked at a picture inside the wallet of the said guard wearing a hawaiian shirt, standing next to what looked like a warthog wearing a dress and too much jewelry.

"Oh no sir, that's my Mother. But a beautiful lady though, isn't she?" He smiled proudly.

"More then beautiful. Mmmm." Madara drooled. Then he perked up and twitched. "Oh no!"

"What?" The guard said, taking out his stun gun from it's holster.

"I'm sorry- but when I'm sexually aroused, my second personality emerges! Oh noooo!" He twitched and did a series of other rapid movements of the arms and head. Before straightening out and blinking. The he smiled and started hugging the guard. "My name's Yuuna-Chan! And I think you're cutsy-cootsie-coo!" Said the poor, desperate man, in a very high squeeky voice.

"Uhhh, wow, maybe you are alittle insane... But then again, people with mulitipul personalities can live a normal life in society." He informed.

"Cuuuuu! you're so adoridible mister!" He squeed, voice raising a few pitches as he squeezed the life out of the man.

The guard looked down to Tobi. Who was standing two feet infront of them. Hands behind his back with a cute, almost curious look on his white face. "Hey kid, do you know how to get him to stop."

Tobi smiled, and it grew a bit more terrifing with each word. And he cocked his head slightly. And very sweetly said: "Yes, I do."

-Back with the Others-Konan's POV

"Karin might already be inside." Yahiko said, when he scoped the courtyard. "We can go ahead now."

Yeah, about that. On the way here, we got stopped by Karin, who had bribed the entire story from Naruto. And, because of _me,_ she insisted she come along. This is what happens when you're nice to someone, they repay it to you by risking their freedom to do the stupidest of crap... But anyway.

"But, how do we get over here?" I could, of course, guess many ways of getting over the fence. But I didn't want to do any of them.

Yahiko probably had too many ideas too. He turned and leaned against the bottom half of the fence that wasn't chain-linked. "Hidan, I'll let you handle that." ...WHAT?

"Oookay!" He cheered almost to himself. He jumped up and grabbed a tree. And I immidiantly shot up after him.

"Hidan what are you _doing?"_ I asked in a hushed frantic tone.

"Gimme a second!" He groaned. Our dumb luck and the guards stupidity isn't going to last this entire crusade I'm sure.

I'm still trying to figure out the exact logic of breaking into a asylum. Yes, we want Deidara out. But couldn't we just have a nice meeting with the Insanity Board and ask nicely to see Deidara? Maybe convince the stupid little twerp that Sasori's alive and then he can be out by the end of the week and _then_ we can have the cute little Seme-Uke reunion?

...Maybe Yahiko's just impatient. Or is so supremely smart that he knows some hidden fact that would keep that from ever happening. And our only hope is to break Deidara out of the asylum... Oh gawd I don't know which option makes more sense anymore!

Hidan was halfway up the tree. He grabbed onto a branch and climbed up to sit on it. He could jump right off and onto the other side of the fence now.

I looked over to the amature 'control room' that Kakuzu was actually rather stealthily placed ontop of. Only reveiling himself to give Hidan the signal that they were both ready.

I was still standing up, using the tree as a cover. I looked up to check Hidan, he pulled a weird thing, that looked like a pimped-out slingshot..."Hidan what is that?"

Hidan brought it up to admire. "It's my old slingshot, I got Itachi to fix around some rubberbands to make it hit farther. And then I put my Dad's hunting scope on top of it." ... Well, that's very... Effective?... um, there's no word for that I don't think...

Hidan started to aim it at the guard that was walking back and forth infront of the front doors. And all I could see was the potato shooter hanging over the edge on Kakuzu's end, which, even if someone did look up to see it, could be mistaken for a camera.

I saw Kakuzu's hand come up again. And after a five second interval that I don't remember anyone discussing (Maybe it's Seme-Uke Telepathy?) The muffled woosh from the potatoe gun was the only thing I could hear.

Well, that was convieniantly perfect. Kakuzu's guard fell into a patch of shrubs as Hidan's stood there with his head tilted back a minute before falling onto the ground.

'YAHOO!" Hidan yelled- no _screamed._ "I'VE NEVER HAD A BETTER SHOT IN MY LIFE!"

A potato shot into the tree branch behind Hidan, that liquified the potato and broke the branch cut his celebration short.

Over by Kakuzu, he was doing a series of gestures, that if they had a meaning, would be '_Shut the fuck up you idiot scumbag you! or I'll come to your house with an axe and chop your dick off!'_

Hidan seemed to cooperate. He jumped off the branch and onto the other side of the fence. Still grinning like the idiot virgin he is.

Well, at least he isn't sleeping all the time now. It's refreshing... When it isn't nerve-racking.

Yahiko gets up and addresses me. "Konan, can you climb the tree?" A voice in my head screamed 'No!' and the amount of time that I was silent trying to decide wether to mimick or not it told him the answer. He turned to Hidan. "Hidan, can you catch her?"

The silver idiot, whose white clothes seemed to be glowing in the dark, cocked his head. Yahiko sighed, and although I myself would assume big and beefy Hidan _could_ catch me. Yahiko apparently knows otherwise.

"Konan, start up the tree."

I meeped. And felt alittle dizzy and watery-eyed. Common, you're not some fashion-crazed girly girl. You've been reffered to as tomboy before... But, but, but, that's a _really_ big tree. And there's a scary, and sort of looming Insane Asylum on the other side.

Yahiko kind-of pushes me into the tree gentley. I breath deep, oh- gawd what's that chemical smell? Nevermind, nevermind. Over the fence I go.

I grab onto the vines scaling the tree like Hidan had. I have to try three times- suddenly realizing how heavy my under-a-hundred-pounds body weight is compared to the strength in my arms. And immidiantly deciding that I'll star doing yoga with Mom when we get back, or, get out of prison for doing this in the first place.

I'm half-way to the special branch when I- don't really slip. Just very quickly slide down the tree and have to be caught by Yahiko.

He sets be down to shake my head and readjust myself. My shirts ripped in a very conveniant place, my pants are shredded, and my knee is bleeding... But I didn't scream this time!

I nodd to him. And Hidan yawns really loud. I start climbing up the tree again, taking note that I need to hold on harder, and also that I need to come up with a believable story for why it looks like I slit my wrists. Jiraiya, it's almost certain that he knows about our little road trip. But I think I'll hold off on telling Mom for a while.

Actually, the only people that know we're doing this that aren't here are Jiraiya, Chiyo, Zetsu, because Tobi blurted it out to him. And Sasuke and Naruto. But Itachi forbid them from coming. Because Sasuke raises peoples blood pressure with his amazing smartass ability, and Naruto would be ten times more louder then Hidan.

I kind of desperately grab the branch and pull myself pitifully onto the top of it. Swing my legs around a few times untill I'm sitting on it like Hidan had been.

...Thaaat's a long way down, and I'm flashbacking, to when I was four, and at the park. I thought it would be fun to get to the very top of the roof of the jungle gym. I got there, and when I looked down. My tear ducts switched on and I starting screaming like crazy. And Mom stood under me for almost half an hour trying to get me to jump down to her before she had to climb it up to get me... I'm currently absorbed in this memory as Yahiko trys to get my attention.

"Konan! Konan I can climb up and over and then you can jump down for me to catch you." Aww, so cute. All that needless trouble just because I'm having a panic attack.

"No, no, I- I c-can make it." Fuck I just stuttered.

"Konan?"

"No need to give the girl special treatment~ Ha ha ha." I try to say.

I blink, and my tear ducts are about to switch on when someone walks in next to Hidan. "Konan? get down here." Kakuzu says in his usual might-be-annoyed-might-be-bored-or-something monotone.

I gulp, not really a way to logically buy time. But with Akatsuki together again, we can go ahead and act like four-year-olds and not need a logical reason to sit in the tree and shake uncontrolably... I kind of teeter over alittle before my arms push off without me wanting them to quite yet.

Kakuzu catches me and I swear to fucking gawd. For those 3.8 seconds I was completely crushing on him. He put me down... I'm good now. But I'm dizzy from the ten-or-something-foot fall, and I'm probably blushing like crazy, either at the large dose of trouble I cause just jumping out of a tree, or the thing with- wow those are pretty big muscles on Kuzu's arms I've never noticed them before...

Hidan raises a hand and points to me. "Boobs!" I looked down, my red shirt's hole had gotten bigger, and me wearing a front-snap bra right now ment that I didn't even have that to hide my-... supreme... boobage... Does anyone have a pin or something?

Kakuzu politely noted my giant cleavage and then punched Hidan for his rudeness.

Yahiko scammbers up the tree in about two seconds and barely touches the branch when he swings himself over the fence... Yeah, I feel awfully pathetic right now.

"...So?"

"Now we go inside." Okay, that's good info.

-Meanwhile-Normal POV

"Why couldn't you just do that _before?_" Madara practically moaned, staring, open-mouthed at the unconcious security guard under him.

"You never _asked_ me if I had an idea." Explained Tobi, holding the metal baseball bat over his shoulder.

-Back with the Others-Konan's POV

Before going to the door. Yahiko checked on the potato-victim guard. He wouldn't be waking up any time soon. And on the big statue in the middle of the yard there was a little plaque that read: 'Thompson Asylum. Home for the Mentally Unwell'

I'm in a bad movie. That's it. A really, really bad movie.

The Yahiko pulls me off and we walk around the other knocked-out guard and to the front doors.

Inside, everything is steriotypically grimy. White tiles, and another sign in the middle. With 'Thompson Asylum' on the front again, and underneith that a note that all guests must check in with the receptionist.

Moving forward, Karin's leaning against the receptionist desk. "Well?" Yahiko asked.

"Receptionist isn't in." She said almost absently. "But, because of that, no guests are allowed beyond this point."

"So there's no way to claim we're guests?" Kakuzu confirmed.

"No, but I have a distraction idea." She explained almost badassingly calm. "Deidara's in Block B, Cell 1. Which according to the map is forward, forward, forward, right at the recreations room, and then onward to the last door on your left.

I can hear screaming. Lots of screaming. I can't really pick out any that are Deidara, but agonizing screaming alone is freaking me the hell out. And I think I hear drilling too. Don't tell me they have their own personal dentist here?

Or maybe the drill has nothing to do with teeth. I don't want to know. "What are you going to do Karin?" Yahiko asked again.

She shrugged her arms. "Make em' chase me?"

Yahiko gave a sigh, and he sighs alot, but this sigh had a really annoyed 'wow this is a stupid idea' empathsis on it. "Okay, do what you can."

Wait- "Yi'ko, she's _twelve years old._"

"I'm good." She held up a collection of perfume bottles in both hands. I flinched alittle. Why is it so obvious she's Orochimaru's daughter?

Yahiko scans the map on the left wall. Before I could try to state any more reasons of how _wrong_ this is. Karin seemed to go on ahead. Infront of the room was a door that led to one of those square hallway things. I used to think it was for sound proofing but seeing as how I can here the screams of the deranged from _here._

We follow her into that room as Hidan starts giggling again. And he's doing little dances apparently called 'I'm breaking into an asylum!~ I'm breaking into an asylum!~ I'm breaking into an asylum!~'

Kakuzu pulls Hidan as Yahiko pulls me up to a wall. Karin looks back at us and gives us a victory sign before she calmly strolls through the door.

Just as the door closes I hear the painfully stupid line of "Hey! you're not supposed to be here!" Through the windows we see her sprint off to the left as a man in white comes in from the right and chases her.

"Quick let's go." Yahiko pulls me back up and we go through the door ourselves, starting for the opposite way Karin went.

"Yahiko?"

"Yes?"

"I'm breaking into an asylum."

"I know! awsome right!" Hidan squees again and Kakuzu actively punches him in the back of the head.

We hear more yells as Karin makes sure all the guards in the area see her. "Come on, we can't slow down now."

Yeah, very nice line Yi'ko. Next can be Yippie-Kai-A.

We hear lots of thundering steps going up. Which convieniantly signals that Karin has led the upstairs. Yahiko pulls me along and Kakuzu and Hidan follow behind quite effectively.

With the halls empty we're free to just keep walking, going through the doors already opened by Karin and her security stampede we can still hear upstairs.

Well... This, is, uhhh... This is-... This is something else... It's humid in here...

Then we get to a door with a 'Recreational Room' sign glowing above us. Yahiko and Kakuzu both look through the windows on the doors. "There's two guards in there. We have to get through the door on the right to find Deidara."

"Which door?" Hidan said pushing Kakuzu to the side to look.

"The one with 'Block B' in big, pretty letters above it Hidan."

"I can't see the stupid signs!"

"It's on the side you hold your knife with." Kakuzu explains. Hidan looks around.

"That one?" He points to the left.

"That's the one you hold your _fork_ with Hidan." Kakuzu said, voice getting blood thirsty. "Your right is the hand you _write_ with."

"Huh? Oh, okay, why didn't you just say that sooner?"

This is not happening...

"So what now?"

"I'll go!" Hidan raises his hand quite gladly.

"You're going to distract them while we go on ahead?"

"_No,_" Hidan pointed his finger in Kakuzu's face. "_I'm_ going to make them not look at you while you guys go on to the write-way and hide while you wait for me to come back for you! I don't wanna miss the breaking-out part. I always wanted to see Deidara in a straight jacket~"

Yahiko blinked. Kakuzu blinked. I blinked. And Hidan just stood there like a smiling, virgin idiot... moving on.

"Fine, but don't get caught." I've decided to stop questioning Yahiko's orders.

Kakuzu pulls me to the side, apparently knowing what Hidan's going to do. Yahiko follows our lead on the other side.

Best course of action. Because Hidan's next move was to kick down the doors and quite obnoxiously yell. "Hey! ya' fuckin' pansies! Suck me!" And then running off to the hand that he holds a fork on.

Well, at least the psychos I'm with are fearless. Or really stupid. Hidan may be both, or a extreme case of one.

Yahiko leads the was when it came to scuttering across the white room littered with couches and things crazy people apparently like to do. Then going through the door that had 'Block B' in big, pretty letters.

Yahiko motioned us over to a empty hall. On the other side of the hall was another room that read 'showers' And since it's roughly three in the morning, I don't think we need to worry about any late-night bathers.

There were loud footsteps going past the door, I'm feeling very impassive, a part of my brain is probably believeing this is a dream. Maybe when I jumped out of the tree I hit my head, and they had to take me home. And I'm imagining all this... Well, this'll keep me from crying for the next while...

"Hey! there's a bunch of commotion upstairs!" One guard says. Oh, hey, Lady Luck still loves us. People go up and I hear one guy muttering something about sucking. Oh, Hidan's comment. They can't find him.

Yahiko peeks out the door after a couple minutes. I kind of feel like laughing. Maybe psychoness is contagious. Outside the general area is deserted. I tip-toe over and close the doors to the Rec-Room just in case.

"Hidan..." Kakuzu trys to call quietly although that never really works. Yahiko found another map on a wall. And is double-checking his memory of the places entire layout.

I circle around, I am calm. I am at peace with being here now. It's not that crazy- "A-"

"Hi!" Hidan cooed after popping out a laundry basket and sticking a crazy persons sock in my mouth- _EW_.

His following words were 'ow-ow-ow-ow' As Kakuzu grabbed his overly gelled head and pulled it out. Okay, I'm actively freaking out again, and I have the taste of schizophrenic foot sweat in my mouth.

Yahiko 'shh'd' all of us and motioned for us to follow him down the hall. I smell really strong chemicals and I still hear screams of metal pain and something is most certainly fucking drilling.

Yahiko speeds up to the end of the hall. He checks a sign and motions us over. I'm the first one to run infront of the window to look inside.

The room had a undressed cot and a toilet. The walls are disgustingly dirty and there's one spot on the right side that I really hope is tomato sauce. The floors are black and white checkered, and there's a barred window opposite the door. But I'm not really paying attention to any of that, after getting over the 'tomato sauce' on the wall my full attention is on the gold-and-denim boy sitting under the window.

Deidara doesn't look much diffrent then when I last saw him. But I can actually see him clearer now. His pants are the same dark blue jeans he left in, just ripped, torn and really really dirty. The baggy denim jacket is still on him, and his hair just looks slightly more ratty then before. He's in a trance with the wall or something, with half-lidded blue eyes completely blank. "Dei? hey 'Dara! there ya' are!"

"Shut up Hidan!" Kakuzu growled as he hunched down to try and pick the lock on the door.

"I found him~ I found him~" Hidan sings annoyingly. But the only thing I'm concerned with is that Deidara doesn't even show any sign that he hears us.

"Deidara?" I try, sounding alittle desperate. "Deidara, Deidara honey, Sasori woke up."

Something changed, no, something _more_ then changed. Something erased, Deidara's eyes got instaintly clearer, and he looked up at me as innocently as a toddler. "... Really? cool..." ... WELL FUCK-SHIT! THAT'S ALL THE HELL I HAD TO DO? "...So can we go home now?"

Yahiko was at another side of the hall, keeping watch for people coming. But I just stepped away from the door, silently seething. Kakuzu seemed to give his lock-pick one final punch and then pulled it out and opened the door.

Deidara tranced out to infront of Hidan. "Hey! Dei! How you doin?"

"I think I have an ulcer." Replied the newly, mentally, if not completely healed Deidara.

"AGH!" I slap him across the face and start throwing a temper tantrum consisting of grunts and screeches.

"Konan, now's not the time to be slap-happy." Yahiko attempted to point out.

"I missed you too Ko-Chan." Deidara said, not even hurt really, just in an ironic sort of way. And I screech again-

"_I have been fucking worried sick about you for days and that's all you can say you faggot-assed little motherfucking twit!"_ I'm not sure I ment to say that out loud, but it came out. And I had to pant heavily afterward.

Deidara blinked. "How long has it been?"

"Two, three days I think?" Yahiko tryed to remember. Okay, worst of all. Everyones just as- as- _blank_ about it!

Deidara cocked his head. I haven't seen him as himself in almost two months, but for some reason I don't care... _at all._ "Hmm, I don't remember much."

"Oh common! nothing! I always wanted to see inside the mind of a pyscho! It was gonna be my next science report." Hidan whined, truely dissapointed.

"Well, I remember absently, sadisticly loving the nurses' torture that even when I wasn't thrashing around. If she touched me I'd start screaming like crazy again." He recalled. And my emotions right now are nothing more describable then W.T.F.

"Nice jacket."

"Thanks, stole it from the dude my Mom's married to." He replied to Hidan, lifting his arm out to model the dirty sleeves.

"Hate to break the chit-chat guys. But the guards are coming back." Yahiko hushingly growled.

"I got it!" Hidan yelled raising his hand for volenteer.

"Be quick Hidan, we're going to head for a diffrent way we came in."

"What about Karin?" I asked, Deidara perked up like about to say 'Karin's here?'

"If the guards are coming back down that only means one thing." Yahiko explained like I couldn't already guess. Well, I almost couldn't guess. And Yahiko's freakishly smart, so... Distracting myself from the captured twelve-year-old...

Hidan waved us off before running down the hall. He stopped at one turn and waved to apparently a on-coming guard. "Hi honey!"

"YOU!" The guard and two of his companions chased Hidan down a seperate hall without even noticing us standing right here infront of a open cell door. The power of Hidan's big mouth, you have to admire it.

"What next, O holy leader?" I asked him. Decideing that I'm allowed to be pissed off now.

"Now," He starts, "we run like half-dead chickens." Deidara makes the appropriate sound effect as I second-guess having come to get him out.

Now, let me explain that this is very much was we get to do. As we go the opposite way Hidan did, circle around a room that probably doesn't need to be there. And end up going the same way Hidan did.

-Meanwhile-Normal POV

"Okay girlie. You're gonna go play with some equally bitchy friends now. Okay?" The big, bulking guard that had finally grabbed Karin as she hopped over desks in the main office now had her over his shoulder as he took her down the floors to put her in a holding cell untill police got there.

"Yippie-Kai-A."

"What did you think you were doing anyway? this some kind of hazing?"

This man was one of the smart guards. But since he was one of the beefiest, he was put in charge of standinf infront of the really, really insane crazy peoples doors all day. Probably the only way Karin got caught too.

If this is put off as a hazing gone bad. She'd get sent back home after a few days. And Daddy Orochimaru's form of punishment for Karin is sending her to stay with Aunt Orochimaruko, and her adopted boys. Jugo, who was a sweetheart despite being schizophrenic and needing constaint supervision. And then there was Suigetsu... Karin could fill the a dictionary with things wrong with Suigetsu. From A for Absurd, to M for Maniac, to Y for Yucky. Although she hasn't found a word for Q yet.

Karin decided to bite the mans arm yet again. Which he hardly flinched at, but it gave her enough time to grab another perfume bottle from her purse and throw it at the floor.

"What do you think you're doin-" The man slipped on the puddle, and fell right on the bottom step of the staircase. He didn't let go of Karin, but she didn't intend for him to. She readjusted herself on his shoulder and scratched at his face.

Inflicting harm on a federal officer should get her a few months in Juvie, and maybe enough time to level-up her puppy dog eyes to where Daddy won't be too harsh on her.

-Back with the Others-Konan's POV

Yahiko got us to the door we'd been inside waiting for Hidan the first time. Through the shower room. And on the other side to the laundry room. Where Yahiko's window theory had been right. "How'd you guess-?"

"It's so humid in this place, there wern't any vents and the only windows were in the prisoners rooms. So I figured a small room like laundry would have a window too, especially if it was right next to the showers." ...How the fuck does he do that?

Deidara's just streching his arms and cracking bones he hasn't moved regularly in three days. Kakuzu... Kakuzu is insanely calm right now, like Itachi always is. But I think he's worrying about Hidan, and maybe using his brain power waying the odds of Hidan getting out.

Which raises my question. "What about Hidan now?"

"I'll go find him." Kakuzu says right after me.

"Wait," Yahiko stopped him. Raiseing his hand up to touch his shoulder "I memorized all those maps, if I find him I could help him tire out the guards and still be able to make it back here. But you promise me you can get these two out of here."

Kakuzu looks at the door like he's finalizing the odds of Hidan's manuevering abilities, and then to me and the twit Deidara, thinking if he wants to be saddled with the psychotic baby and the girly bitch.

He decided. "... Okay, but tell Hidan if he gets caught, Kakuzu's going to break him out of jail, and then chop him into little pieces and throw him in a river... And then save yourselve at all cost, because next in line to lead this group of fucktards is me."

"Got it,"

Yahiko zooms out of the room and Kakuzu opens the window for us all to jump out of and into the bushes below. "You're really next in line for leader?" I asked, for some reason surprised.

"Well, you haven't been added to the offical list yet. But it goes him, me, Itachi, Sasori, Kisame, Deidara, and Hidan."

"...Really now?"

"Yeah, cause Kisame's bad at making life-or-death decisions and Itachi's the decendant of a God or something." Kakuzu seemed to forget Deidara was here. And then the blonde fumed, I could feel heat radiating off his body and he growled like the perfect Dinosaur imitation. But it kind of cheered me up alittle.

-Outside

After jumping out of the window and pulling Deidara away before he set the bushes on fire. We walked along the fence untill we found a tree that we could do the same thing as before on.

This time, my climbing skills were noted, Kakuzu climbed up first, then Deidara was made to poutingly stay while I pulled myself up and over to be caught by Kakuzu again. Then Deidara, quite elegantly actually, climbed the tree and plopped down on the other side with us.

We made the way silently down the convieniant path, after squeezing out from behind the sign, we noticed there was a second car parked behind Madara's truck. "...Zetsu?"

"Hi kids!" Our Homeroom teacher greeted smiling, standing next to Tobi, and Madara who was sitting on top of the unconsious security guard.

"DEIDARA-SEMPAI!" Tobi zipped over to us and tackled Deidara to the ground.

I blinked before looking back at our adults. Madara looked at Tobi seemingly smothering the screaming Deidara and then up to us. "That kids talented you know."

"Yeah, sure is." I agreed, failing to mention Tobi's other skill of slightly evil excuses that he used on him and Tsunade.

"Where's the others?" Zetsu asked.

"We have to wait for them." Kakuzu informed. "But what are you doing here?"

He blinked before raising his hand. "Tobi invited me. I was thinking I could help with rides."

"Deidaradeidaradeidara- Deiiiiidaaaraaaa!" Tobi cooed giddily. Wiggiling ontop of the tortured Deidara-Kun.

"Son, get off. People'll think you're gay, and half of them already do, so..." Madara couldn't finish that sentance.

"Son?" Deidara spoke in what was more a exhale. Then he sat up and held Tobi still by the shoulders and looked rapidly back and forth. "... TOBI'S AN UCHIHA?"

-Later

It wasn't too much later. Just a lot of nothing for five minutes, except for Deidara having another, much more comical mental breakdown as he tried to scrape the 'Disgusting, filthy, poisoness Uchiha germs' off his poor unfortunate skin. And screamed at Tobi full-blast.

I might be worried about that if the Asylum wasn't roughly thirty yard away, and there was already lots of commotion going on inside it.

_I hope_ there's alot of commotion going on inside it. Five minutes is a long time for fat, stupid guards to run around for. But it was only after that that I could see some commotion by the front doors.

After that silver and orange blurs sped out from behind the hedges. Both of which screaming "Start the car start the car start the fucking car!"

These calls brought Itachi and Kisame out of the control booth. The came for the mini-door inside the gate and Itachi unlocked it convieniantly with keys he must've found in the shack/control room.

So, quite quickly, Madara hustled them all inside Zetsu's car and then we were gone in roughly 5 seconds. Madara stayed back to play the victim and sync with the unknowing guards memory.

Once we were down the road and out of sight. However. "Cool! can we do that again sometime? hn?" Yahiko wasn't fast enough to stop me from lunging for Deidara and attempting to strangle him

-Later

I just broke into an Asylum...

This is not happening...

Me and Kisame were practically holding eachother, exchanging our stories of survival. Although Kisame's consisted of sitting in a dark shack with Itachi for half an hour, he still had alot of thoughts to talk about.

Deidara was unvased by my attempt on his life, and was still complaining about being next to and Uchiha. A cheerful Uchiha, that was currently hugging him, and telling him how much he missed him.

Deidara tryed to pull out of Tobi's hold, suceeding, and leaving the boy temporarily confused by only having a jacket in his arms now that he opened his eyes... Wait a second, Deidara was wearing a _black_ shirt when he ran off.

We looked high-and-low for him for three days and he slipped past us enough to_ change clothes?_ how did he do that?

Itachi turned around in his seat just then. "Here, wear these." Itachi handed him two wristbands, likely to hide the bleeding scars I just noticed on Dei's wrists from, ya' know, trying to break out of the handcuffs they probably had to put him in.

"I'm not taking anything from you stupid Uchiha!" He yelled, rather predictably.

"Oh my God." Kakuzu groaned before yanking off and throwing back his own wristbands. Dei inspected them and decided that they did infact go with his outfit.

My hugging with Kisame got tighter as my mind started going over all the things that are crazy about this situation again.

We were nearing the Hospital now, Yahiko didn't even have to sound the command, I find it mildly depressing that is was obvious what the next stop was.

Tobi had moved on to lay down in the seats and had Deidara's lap as a leg-rest. "Get offa me!"

"Why?" Tobi cooed so damn innocently, you'd think he was the stupidest being on earth.

-Later

Zetsu let us all pile out before he skidded off to avoid any lawsuits. Tobi was cradling Deidara's jacket like a priceless treasure, although I have a hunch it's to get all his Uchiha germs on it to piss of Deidara, and that small action will assist in him taking over the world someday... Make his Daddy proud.

We got to the check-in counter that my own Mommy just had to be standing at. "Konan! kids where have you been? Your clothes you're filthy a-" Then she noticed Deidara, and she was silent for quite a while.

"I love you Mommy," I came up and kissed her cheek, then moved on.

Deidara also came up and kissed her cheek as everyone bowed, waved at, or avoided eye contact and we continued going forward.

Anyway. We were at the waiting room when Deidara got up to the head of the crowd to turn around and make faces at us. And there's know way that I was the only one that wanted to punch him at that point. I'm tired. Like, _really_ tired.

Deidara turned around when we entered the room, and Kurotsuchi got up from a seat in the waiting room when she saw us.

"Tsuchi~" Deidara cooed, barely surprised. "How'd you know I'd be here?"

"I came by to see the others." She said, not screaming and crying like I was about to expect. " And Chiyo said they went to break you out." Blush on my cheeks, wow, all the embarressment is finally hitting me. "... Mom and Dad, er, are in... well, they're kind of like in deep, deep shit." She explained.

"Cool," Replied Deidara hilariously calm.

She smiled at that. "... They want to take me to Granpa Onoki's... Well, they're _taking_ me to Granpa Onoki's."

Deidara started laughing, that golden bell laugh I have to admit I really, really missed. "Haha, you have to bunk with Akatsuchi."

She half-glared at him for that. "Yeah, asshole, that's why I'm here. If you're out, you're supposed to come with me."

I could see Dei's cocky-ass smirk that I also really, really missed. "I can't come."

"I knew you wouldn't." She said sounding rather happy by the fact. She half-punched his chest but then it turned into a hug. In which Deidara picked her up and twirled her around alittle. "I'll miss you." 

"Miss you too." He replied, pecking her cheek... When he's being super-cool older brother, Deidara looks extreamly- um. _Un-_gay, actually.

Hidan and I think Tobi were the one's _Awww_-ing. Kurotsuchi punched his chest again when she let go. "And remember, no girlfriends with vagina's." Deidara's puppy-blue eyes got wide and he started whining and quivering his lip. Then he pointed at me. Kurotsuchi looked. "... No, not even Konan. She's too hot for you anyway." Deidara made a loud, whining sound that could compete with Naruto. Kurotsuchi gave her pathetic big brother another hug before waving us all off.

She stopped only for a second to peck Itachi's cheek.

Deidara did another choking scream and I think almost started crying. Itachi did his form of a blanch and started hiding behind Kisame. And for Deidara's sake, we were trying desperately not to chuckle.

Deidara would have stood there staring at his ghost image of what just happened. But Hidan and Yahiko both started pushing him down the hallway,

Poor things only hope now is to see his vaginaless girlfriend... Wow, yea, gay joke need ta' stop... Later tonight.

Eventually Deidara actually seemed to blink himself to life. Then he began spazzing out and attacked Tobi, wanting his jacket back. Tobi held it away from him while Deidara tryed to get it back- hey, I just noticed. Tobi's about three inches taller then Deidara. L.O.L.

Deidara's cussing him out and runs up ahead to pout. One of us, _someone_ was this close untill the final stage to the plan started up.

Deidara'd stopped infront of the doorway. I had worry-crap running through my head suddenly. Everything from it not working to Sasori being friggin' _dead_. Because I'm pyscho now.

Yahiko nudged Deidara inside the room while the others were still arguing behind us. I joined by Yahiko's side. Deidara just stood half-in the doorway looking at Sasori, who was not only alive, but awake, and giving Deidara that 'what-the-fuck-are-you-looking-at' look of his.

I could see Deidara visibly shaking, and my heart sped up alittle. Deidara eventually wobbled over to the side of the bed and got down on his knees and buried his face in the bed like I had once.

Itachi was right next to the doorway, seemingly _scared_ of going near Deidara or else tip him over the deep end. I walked inside alittle keeping Yahiko at my elbow. Trying to slow my heart-beat down.

_Everythings okay now, everythings better again._

The room was dim and Chiyo was in one of the chairs by the wall asleep. Deidara rolled his head over to look at Sasori. "What'cha been doin' Sori?"

He looked like he might roll his eyes. But the look on Deidara's face that I couldn't see must've stopped him. I could even swear I heard some tears of relief in Dei's voice.

"What have _you _been doing?" He asked like he hadn't just woken up perfectly fine after a month-long coma.

But I got closer, still dragging Yahiko with me. Moving like you would searching the dark room in a horror movie. Now I could see Deidara smile in basic embarressment as he re-buried his face. "Nutin'."

The others made it to the doorway. When I actually paid attention I could have laughed at Itachi still hiding. Hidan was laughing faintly for no apparent reason. Kisame looked over at me with the victory smile and if Kakuzu let anybody see his face he'd probably have it too.

"We went to alot of trouble getting him back." Yahiko said, his voice raspy for some reason. "Let him calm down."

I have a hunch Deidara's flipped out before. But I also have a hunch that Hidan's broken into a legal establishment before. And sometimes that Kakuzu's killed someone before. It's just a vibe. But it isn't a joke anymore that some of us are probably clinically insane... Well, too much.

"What did you do this time?" Sasori asked that snapped me out of it. Deidara gently banged his head on the mattress.

"He threw a hissy-fit because he didn't have his hubbie to give him kissies anymore." Hidan said, Deidara started laughing into the bed and I choked a chuckle myself. _Now_ Sasori rolled his eyes.

Deidara kept laughing before slipping off the bed. Still laughing, by then everyone was chuckling in their own way.

Oh my gawd. We just broke into a fucking asylum. Broke someone who obviously needs to be in there out. Probably sent Karin to Juvie in the process. And above all, are now laughing like maniacs over it all.

I. Am. Fucking. Crazy.

But we all are, what was it? 'mentally crazy souls only need other mentally crazy souls, then they crazier.' Screw my life to hell. I'm a Faerie of the Unseelie court. Make me a rug of mice tails and fall in love with me.

Deidara plopped his torso back on the bed when everyone had stopped being crazy. Yahiko pulled some chairs over and me and him both sat down. "So what's wrong with you? hn, can't control your bladder? can't see out your left eye? can't have sex _ever?_ cause that one was _always_ a give-in."

Sasori rolled his eyes. Tiredly, and settled into his pillows. He has alot of them, I'm actually envious. "Can't feel anything, which you would think would lead to those."

Everyone was quiet for a while. I leaned on Yahiko who started patting my hand like a dog. He shuddered a sigh, quietly. Deidara looked like he was about to fall asleep. I could see Tobi trying to peek over Kisame's shoulder.

I was tired, killer tired. Just wanted to fall asleep on Yahiko's shoulder right there. Deidara's lullaby-voice chattering nothing wasn't helping at all.

Everyone was in the room now. Kakuzu was chatting with Sasori while Deidara was lulling to sleep. But Sasori smiled though, looked like the 'god-my-friends-are-idiots-and-i-still-love-them' smile too. Hidan grabbed a blanket to drape over Dei. I can't imagine what the last time any of us slept right was.

Tobi plopped down next to Deidara with that 'Hi I'm Tobi' smile of his. Sasori looked down at him. "What's _that?_"

"Meet our newest member, Tobi."

Sasori's eyes looked him up and down. Flashback to when _we_ first met. "You replaced me before I even died. Sweet."

Tobi looked like he was pouting. Then he looked behind him to me.

I smiled. Half-asleep. "Sori's a flippin' jackass, you just need to get used to him." Tobi smiled again before turning back.

I looked up. Madara, fresh from the battle field appered in the doorway. "You guys should all get home." He looked around the room. "I'll keep Tob' and Dei. Rest of you high-tail it."

Yahiko had pulled me out of the seat before I could protest. I might of sleep-walked. It seemed like we'd gotten outside way too soon.

"Where you headin' Kuzu?" Hidan asked oh-so-causally. Fag probably wants another sleepover.

"Kisame's." Was the flat reply. I opened my eyes to see the look on Kisame's face that said he had no idea of those particular sleeping arrangments.

"Kisa, I need a nights rest. Can I stay too?" Itachi grumbling asked, he looked about as sleepy as I was.

"Sure~"

"We'll steal Sasuke for a sleepover." Yahiko called before Itachi could ask.

"Great, so all I get is my _family,_ PERFECT!" Hidan whined.

"Maddie," I grumbled. Madara glared at my nickname for him. "What happened back at-... 'Happy Volts'?"

He chuckled at that. "They never got the chance to sign Deidara in. I talked to the cops. They've probably forgotten Deidara was even there." We were all in the car now. Pulling out of the Hospital soon.

"What about Karin?" I mumbled, I was already mostly asleep.

He sighed, I could hear it. "They caught her. Guess what? she threw flippin' _perfume bottles_ at them to keep their attention. She'll be goin' to Juvie. But I think she knew it was comin'. I'll get contact info from her Dad for you."

Well, that's a Val if I've ever known one. So what am I? a sober Lolli?

God, making refferences even when I'm... half... asleep...

Zzzz...

-Next day

Stupid... clock... must... kill... hate... all... machines...

Wait, I don't have an alarm clock. That's Naruto's job.

I got up. I was in my bed. Still in my clothes. I was pondering who must've carried me here before I saw Naruto on the roof.

_If Sasuke had a mental breakdown again and Naruto's suicidal then I'm gonna-_

And I thought the drama of my life was over for now. Oh, that's right, it _was_ over. I just slept through it all.

Yahiko came into my room and looked out my window. I groggily got up "What's going on?"

"I dunno, sirens are everywhere. Jiraiya went down to see." He pushed past my stuff and-... climbed out my window...

I, of course followed him. Naruto and Sasuke were both there. Straining to see over trees and hills to where all the cop cars and ambulances went. After I myself gave up I looked down at the town. I spotted Deidara's tuff of hair leaning out a second-story window at the bar. And the big blue thing on the ground yelling up at it was obviously Kisame.

There's Tobi, Yahiko's here, that's Itachi.

Sasori's at the hospital. Karin's in jail. Naruto and Sasuke are here.

Jiraiya's walking up the path. Mom's just reveiled herself running over to him from the porch. I've just spotted Orochimaru on the hill next to his house.

Madara's talking to Chiyo. I even see Kagura, Akame and their boy-cronies. There's Kakuzu-... And I've scanned the rest of the giant crowd. No, I'm sure not _every_one could be there. That'd be weird. But it's a big crowd. I keep looking. and looking, and looking...

Where the fuck is Hidan?

-**End Chapter-**

...How did I guess this? The one chapter I _warned _would be late. And it's up extreamly early! GAH!

I was up untill 2:30am finishing it too O.o I'm weird.

If you have any idea's on what happened to Hidan- since I'm SURE the next one will take a while to finish. Go ahead and throw em' I'll give you a cyber cookie and a illiama named Hal.

I'm currently glareing at all you readers that have alerted and faved this story, but failed to review. But ahead-of-schedule cookies for- um, xxlunafurxx? and then miss cuppycakes RandomDustBunniezAngel... you can get cupcakes too.

Yes. Cookies, cupcakes and pie for all my reviewers. Because you make me feel warm and fuzzy ^_^

Tomarrow... I must go to the Asian market, because I just HAD to beg my Mom to let me make Dango and Anko paste for my Birthday party... And then yeah...

Now, I really want to update the next chapters soon, but as you could have guessed, it's Hidan's turn for the spotlight, and for some unfathomable reason, I want to write Hidan well... Why? I dunno,

I bow to you all, and thankies. This story will end with a complete 20 chapters. Have funs, and I'll tune you in with the sequel consisting of prequels... I am not spelling those right and it's driving me so crazy XD


	17. Last Living Savior

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything Naruto, including Akatsuki and crap... Ow, I have a caffeine withdrawel headache.

I'm here AND IT IS TIME FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER-CHAPTER-CHAPTER!

Of Hidan... currently, he's just so cootsies to meh! (huggles imaginary Hidan plushie)

OKAY!... Hahaha...

Okay, so, ummmm... yeah... uhhhhh,

Okay, so as for my Birthday par-tay. Um, yeah. I felt Halloweeny in the black and orange Kimono. Ah, and my pictures didn't win anything in the fair. First place went to this really pretty fairy picture. Second place went to a bright, colorful landscape picture. And Third place doesn't exsist . Hmmm, as for the latest Naruto chapters...

NUUUUUU! KISAME! I LUB U! ITZ OKAY! DON'T CWRY! POOR KISA-KUNS!... POOR KISA-KUNS IS GUNNA BCUM A AKATSUKI ZOMBIE WITH TEH OTHERZ!

Time to spazz out that- I must have somehow pressed a button- or the c_at_ pressed a button, and the words messed up to where the site deleted my one line for last chapter... It's back up though, It's funny, because without that one sentance, the readers would be like 'How the fuck did KARIN get there?'

I forget what day it was supposed to be last chapter. Regardless of what it was- it is Monday in this chapter. No time skip- I just need it to be Monday.

XD LOLROFL. Anyway, now it's Hidan's turn for the spotlight. We lub u, u little satanist u!

-**The Last Living Savior-**

"Jiraiya!" I yelled down. He looked up at us on the roof. I made the signal motion and he spazzed out and got under me.

I jumped off the roof and onto him while he grunted quite comically. Yeah, heights don't scare me all that much no more.

Yahiko chose to slid down a drain pipe while I could hear Naruto and Sasuke arguing about weither to jump or- Sasuke's suggestion "Go down the stairs like a _normal_ person?"

I waited impatiently for Yahiko to jump off the pipe before we raced down the road. I'm quite impressed neither of us tripped at the speed we were going. Because I could keep track of the time it took to get down there.

I ran into and almost knocked over Kisame, who only avoided going off-balance by picking me up as I rammed into him. "Hey, no fire girly. Just casualties."

"This is fucking screwed." Madara grumbled. He'd been walking around talking to random people. "The cops won't stop talking about a serial killer."

"Serial Killer?" I recalled them fretting about it on the news when Sasuke'd run off. "wait, he's really this close?"

"The cops think so, but they won't tell me what the hell is really going on. Townspeople are already composing their interviews for when the media gets here. I'm half-sure someone just fell down the stairs."

Oh, yay, someone's dead, this is great. Yeah, just perfectly fuckin great after everything I've- calm, calm, calm, and collected. Lets see, Yahiko's pouting because he doesn't have enough information to brainstorm on. Poor genius boy.

Kisame's stretching around and yawning. Then he uses his height to an advantage and tries to looks over the crowd- wow, didn't know there were even this many people here. Maybe the whole town _did_ come out to see what's going on.

Deidara, our little basket-case, has made his way to the roof of the Bar, and Madara is currently yelling at him to stop moving so much before the roof caves in.

Kakuzu joins my side. He looks pissed-to-all-hell, which would make anyone understand that talking to him is lethal right now. So I asked: "Where's Hidan?"

A low rumble which was Kakuzu's form of a growl. I think we all kind of- well, wanted to relax after breaking into an Asylum and all. "He's probably on the other side of the ambulances giving the cops hell for waking him up at a reasonable time."

Kakuzu went forward into the crowd and I lost sight of him within seconds. "What do you think really happened?"

"We're sure to find out soon enough." Yahiko groaned. "Lets just all go get ready-" He stopped short and looked up. "Deidara! mental status?"

"What?" Yelled the blonde tettering over the edge of the bars roof.

"We're good." Yahiko confirmed. "Common."

Slight feelings of a rag doll when Yahiko grabbed my wrist and started pulling me up the hill. Okay, we don't care about the ambulances and cop cars anymore, I'm good with this.

-Later

Yahiko escorted me kindly to my room so I could get dressed. And I relish in the believable theories of him being and obsessive compulsive control freak. But besides that. I put on a white t-shirt with lacey accents and some of my bleached jeans- that seem to be getting holes in them.

I don't look absurdly pale anymore despite some paranoia of what might've happened down the road. I give up on make up, I just put on lip balm and dab my eye lids with eyeshadow so I don't look like a mannequin. Because I can become so blah-say about things to the point where my eyes become half-lidded and I look high.

I hoist up my backpack and exit my room, Naruto's running around the halls and seemingly speaking to Sasuke at the same time, despite the boy standing still as stone at the top of the staircase. I don't register the topic of his blabbing and just focus on making sure he doesn't run into me.

Yahiko exits his own room and grabs Naruto during his marathon. A quick noogie on his yellow head before he follows me downstairs as Naruto whines loudly. Mom and Jiraiya have eyes on the window watching outside, but Mom's taken out some of the cereal choices and milk for us.

Naruto tumbles down the stairs with Sasuke trying to keep up. Naruto tackles a bowl and tears a box open and starts pouring Lucky Charms messily. Mom attempted a lecture that Naruto couldn't hear over the noise. When he was done, Sasuke sat across from him and poured his Cheerio's into a bowl like a normal person.

I took a box of Choco-Pebbles, while all possablities of breakfast conversation were killed by Naruto's mouth opening again. I think he's talking about ponies and super-spies, which must have been his dream last night. He's so ridiculous I'm not even mildly pissed that it's most partially his fault Karin's somewhere eating jail food right now.

Well, maybe juvie food is better. I have no idea, maybe I could ask Hidan next time I see him.

-Later-At School

Kurenai Sarutobi is- happy day- on maternity leave! You gotta love her.

History is gonna be taught by Kakashi Hatake while Kurenai's baby daddy Asuma takes over Science. But I'm currently having prophetic visions of him falling asleep and leaning onto a vial of very bad stuff and pouring it into a glass of super-bad stuff.

I guess Shop isn't that importaint. Who wants to teach kids how to make cars, fix bicycles and mold ashtrays anyway?

Kakashi fits as a History teacher, he's even the steriotype that wiggles in his opinions and stuff, but he asks students for their take like Kurenai would.

After the first time, Yahiko had a discussion with Kakashi on what he was passing notes to me about. So he allowed it al long as the homework we turned in tomarrow was correct and wasn't written in Itachi's handwritting.

Alot of them were coded sentances, losely asking me if I hate anyone, want to kill myself over breaking into a legal establishmetn, or am at all stressed about my currently living arrangements and social life. Hm, alittle bit yesterday, but I'm cool from here on out. Nothing can top my coping radar like that.

Kakashi's explaining all the reasons why the White Star Line on the Titanic sucked. And I'm actually kind of bored out of my skull, yet it is surprisingly entertaining with some of the facts of how much the rich-peoples-luxury-crewsmen had actually ensured the deaths of thousands of people. But maybe I'm just becoming morbid.

Homework is that we get to list all the things we could have been able to do to make sure everyone could've gotten off. And Yahiko's latest note suggests not jinxing it with the 'Unsinkable' title.

-Later-Gym

Sadly, because our mourning is done. We have to interact directly with Guy again. The scary green monster is smiling that demonic grin, and those wide, thick, and completely square teeth are scaring me.

Guy's resently taken an interest in Kisame, which is bad for the poor blue guy, cause this means he gets extra pep-talks and gets to start every exercise. Which is extremely sad.

But it's hard to cry for Kisame, when I keep cheering on that motherfucking bi-polar douchbag faggot artist Deidara, who's running around like a rabid dog like nothings been going on for the last month. And it's funny to see all the dumb-founded looks from the kids in the room that were _there_ when he was taken off to the Happy Farm. But it's funnier when Guy notices and starts happily screeching so scarily, kids start making runs for the door.

-Later-Art

"Good morning children!" Calls Orbi-chaku-scarezoid. "I have very, very good news for you!"

Insert all the kids in class staring dumbfounded at him here.

"Our fellow classmate, Sasori Akasuna, has resently woken from his coma. And he will be returning to school in the next few days!" Some of the more considerate kids gave half-hearted claps. "Oh yes, and you all remember my daughter Karin, the girl that none of you like?" I actually hear a few chuckles. "Well, while getting groceries last night, she was hit by a semi-truck! And will not be returning to school. Calling hours are none of your buisness because according to her diary, it was suicide because of everything you've all done to her. Congratulations!"

Orochimaru twirled around and then starting talking about how we all get to paint pictures centering around horrible ways to meet an end. Deidara, however not as mentally well, but still smarter then all the other currently shocked kids in class, raised an eyebrow to me. I signaled for him to wait a minute.

When Orochimaru asked for us to show the pictures, hamming it up with a the sad voice of someone who may have been crying, I walked up first and displayed my picture of a familiar girl being chased down the familiar grungy white walls of a building, being chased by men in white. Deidara started to laugh.

-Later-Lunch

"Really~ I feel so loved!" Deidara chuckled more as me, him, Yahiko and Tobi walked through the halls heading for the lunchroom. "Hn, I can already see her in the bright orange top and mini-skirt with stolen cigerettes and a homemade scrunchie!"

I give him a tired look like a Mother would give her child. "... Okay, Dei, I'm ready to hug you." He glees and then jumps on me... Okay, yeah, I forgive him. It's something about him being so pretty, and charismatic, and... Uhhh, I dunno, loud.

"Creative, Deidara, and such a pleasant vision." Yahiko monotoned. The hallway looks almost steriotypically full, Tobi seems to want to cling on to Deidara like a monkey while Deidara's talking too loud about Karin's conviction to clobber him. We're already in view of the cafeteria doors where Itachi and Kisame are waiting for us. "But did anyone notice Kakuzu missing during Gym?"

Not untill you mentioned it, but I'm in denile, so I'll let the answer go to someone else. "Eh, you know Kakuzu skips Gym whenever he doesn't feel like excercizing. Besides, hn, he's the last one of us that'd end up in a life-threatening jam."

Yahiko nodded thoughtfully at Deidara's mind-blowingly intelligent reply. And I wonder what we would find if we dissected Deidara's brain. Because normal people don't go pyscho and then become absurdly intelligent the next day. But there's alot of tests scientists would want to run on the group of pyschos reffered to as Akatsuki.

When the group met up we all went over to the food line to try and grab the good stuff before we started to feel like steriotypes.

After a whole lot of nothing. We were leaving the lunch line. And now, the start of episode 56 in 'The Life of the Destined to be Killed Teenager'

Kakuzu arrived, and after whispering something to Yahiko, exited the cafeteria just as eruptly as he entered. And my women's intuition was telling me to KILL MYSELF NOW. "Kakuzu says we need to eat in the alley.

Deidara chuckled, Kisame seemed to blanch, he's seems to keep joining me in being the only one that realizes the magnitude of situations. Itachi's impassive and probably thinking: 'Oh, lunch outside, that sounds quite pleasant, insert smiley face here'.

-Akatsuki Alley

I gobbled the mayjority of my lunch and threw the plate in the dumpster hiding our spot. I have a feeling I'm going to have to be worrying about more then food in the next five minutes.

We arrived in the alley, clench eyes, take a deep breath. Open eyes-... wait, where's the blood?

The alley is no diffrent, and is being slowly filled. Except me, and actually Kisame and Yahiko, who are standing in the gateway and thinking: 'Did we blink and miss the drama?'

Hidan's at the wall next to another dumpster, drawing perverted doodles, when Deidara jumps up to sit on the dumpster next to him his attention is caught only by the noise of the metal whining under the fourteen-year-olds weight. "Pyscho! you're in one piece!"

"Why do you, Madara, and Kisame keep calling me pyscho?" All those earlier comments about Deidara being smart are now questioned after hearing how very honest he is about not knowing.

Hidan just shrugs and jumps up to clobber Deidara. Who then starts a food-fight that was surprisingly active since Deidara's lunchplate consisted of a bunch of candy and nutrition bars. But they sprayed that soda can at eachother for quite a while.

Kakuzu was in a corner far away from Hidan, seemingly keeping an eye on him. But he always does that. I suddenly wish I hadn't finished my food cause now I feel like I have nothing to do.

I went over to Itachi. "You going to drink that?" I pointed to the un-opened Coca-Cola by his side.

He grinned up at me, "They didn't have my favorite, take it."

I picked the can up and shook it before spraying it's contents on Deidara and Hidan.

-Later

The class bell for whatever-the-fuck class we have next rang but we wern't really letting up. Screw that I'm a girl, Deidara and Hidan were chasing me around the alley like I was a bloody fat guy, who got liposuction on his stomache, and they forgot the boobs and- more equally gross stuff.

When Itachi was done with his food he got up and half-effectively tried to trip either me or my pursuers, I'm not sure which side he's on. Yahiko went of to Kakuzu and I swa him try to say something but Kakuzu waved him off, wow. A Yahiko-pout, that needs it's own definition in a dictionary. There's no word for it.

When we suddenly heard another bell ring, that was kind of a reluctaint que that we had to start moving.

Hidan grabbed Deidara. "Race- HEY LOOK A SPI-DAZZLER!" Hidan pointed the opposite way as Deidara got thrown off his mojo and actually looked the other way, before he sped down the alley after Hidan. Itachi started tugging Kisame apparently ashamed he missed a class. Kakuzu was slowest out the place and me and Yahiko waited for him.

Yahiko wacked him on the shoulder. "What was that? You scared the shit out of all of us."

Kakuzu kind-of shurgged, I leaned back and watched down the alleyway. Everyone was back inside now, I snapped back straight to throw my own part in. "Everything seemed perfectly fine."

Kakuzu sighed, I've never seen him seem so modest before. "That's one of the reasons why I needed you guys here." He said, his voice sounding out-of-characterly soft.

Yahiko might of even been as confused as I was. "What happened Kakuzu?"

Body language and the look in his eyes was saying he didn't like what the next sentance was. "When Hidan got home last night he found his family slaughtered upstairs. That's why the cops were everywhere."

-Later

We missed Science, but we made Math with only a warning from Mr. Umino. No need to say that I wasn't paying as much attention to what letters equal what number as I spent time staring at Hidan.

I was half-convinced Kakuzu was lying. I _wanted_ that to be a lie. But then I could almost see why Hidan was acting so normal. Because I feel pretty damn calm too. But I don't think I would be if I went home today and Mom and Jiraiya were dead.

Hidan's writting on his paper, but it's impossible for him to be taking notes. Hidan doesn't take notes, and his notebook is full of scribbles and weird stuff that I'm not sure what are. But this day still feels pretty damn normal, well, as normal as I've experianced here. Despite Sasori still being in a hospital bed and Hidan being an orphan and all.

His Mom was sweet, I'm not sure what kind of woman could put up with a son like that. And his Dad was always full of jokes. Then he had a sister- well, according to him she wasn't a sister, but the girl his age that lived with him- she was pretty awsome, she couldn't put Hidan in his place, but she tried pretty valiantly.

She _tried. _Damn this is unreal. The author of my life doesn't know when to put meaningless filler when you need it. I should write a complaint.

It's like no matter what kind of scenario I'm in in my life, the bluette named Konan is always screwed. Weither I'm a teenager girl dealing with unreal drama, or if I was a super hero, I'd probably end up fighting the arch villian of the series while surrounded by my weakness and no plot-wise reason to stay alive.

Yeah, I don't think I hate my life, but you have to admit it sucks pretty bad.

I keep looking up and over at Hidan, trying to see if he's writting something. Just unidetifiable scribbles, this is driving me crazy. I sit back in my seat, block out Math, because frankly I'm not sure I want to learn Math at all. And I wait out the rest of the day.

-After School

Homeroom was called off due to something about school sucking. And I'd been looking forward to everyone being in the same class for a while. Instead, I'm walking closer to Yahiko then usual, and were going down the steps to get on the bus.

Hidan was so _bloody normal_ when he grabbed us from behind I almost thought the latest incident was a dream. "What're we doing bitches!"

"What are _you_ doing Hidan?" Yahiko asked, it was his usual reply to when Hidan asked, but the meaning kind of hit me in the head.

Hidan umm'd. "Errr, well, I was thinking-... Uhhhh, I dunno, whatta you wanna do?"

"Hidan, I think we all need a break from activity." Yahiko said, but kept the topic of why away from him. "Let's be lazy untill Sasori gets out of the Hospital."

"Agh, you're no fun." He groaned. When we were all off the steps. Hidan turned and grabbed Kakuzu. "Ey, Kuzu."

"What Hidan?" He wasn't sounding as annoyed as he usually is when he says that.

"Can you go tombstone shopping with me."

I turned around so quickly- but the Yahiko grabbed my arm and started to pull me backwards onto the bus.

-Two Weeks Later

_This, is not real._

_It's like I'm eating a pissed-off eel._

_And I know, that I shouldn't be,_

_So content with it._

_But the eel, it is good._

_But people miss-understood~_

_The dazed look, on my face, as pain~_

_Now I'm feelin' a bit dizzy._

_Do I have a grandpa named Izzy?_

_I see Jesus, infront of me._

_and he's sayin' to me._

_You're buddist, what the hell are you doing here?~_

That was the song I wrote for Literature. Technically, Mom insists we are christian. But buddist was funny.

But my life, it is, so confusing. It's like, I'm eating, an eel-

Stop singing about eels...

It's been a few weeks. Sasori's out, and he was on the verge of letting me say he's grumpy as ever, untill we casually said Hidan's family is dead. And apparently he's considerate.

But that's the thing: Everybodies being all tender, and quiet, and sweet for Hidan... And Hidan keeps looking at us and asking what the fuck is up. Then I usually feel like hitting my head on the table repeatedly. But that's where Yahiko told me I need to smile as best as I can and try and make some perverted jokes.

Hidan and Kakuzu don't come to school sometimes. Yahiko told me Kakuzu's trying to get Hidan to snap out of it before he- er. Well, Yahiko uses a better word for it. But I reffer to the action of snapping out of reality 'Pulling a Deidara'.

But Hidan doesn't seem to posess Deidara's stage of inhuman depression. Which I kind of which I did, because suffering on my own is kind of-... depressing.

It's almost a relief when Hidan isn't in school, because then, we can pretend that nothing weird is going on, and that Hidan Kakuzu just both have the runs and will catch up much, much later.

"Deidara-Sempai!" Tobi is the closest one to cheery, with and away from Hidan. Because he seems to practice the act of excaping reality. "I don't understand my Math homework. If they're letters, how are they numbers. And if they're numbers, then why aren't the numbers to begin with. And if it's supposed to make sense, why do I have to learn it?"

"I understand Math as much as the next kid Tobi." He stopped short like he got an idea. "Actually, you might be able to pull off drooling all over your paper. And then they'll put you in a fun, happy class where instead of Math, you make pasta pictures!" Deidara exclaimed.

Tobi's mouth fell open. "I love pasta pictures! oh-oh-oh will they have tomato sauce to? I like to use it to color the red stuff!"... Heh, heh, I've started to believe that Tobi is never serious. The cute, naive, retarded act is all a ploy to take away from his world domination plan.

"Deidara, don't tease Tobi. Our school doesn't have a special kids class." Kisame patted the two boys on their heads.

"You should know that Deidara, they went on a field day trying to prove you had ADHD so they could get one and then qualify for a good-school grant." Sasori groaned out, waiting rather impatiently ahead of us.

"If I had ADHD, I wouldn't have to supreme ability to sit and beat such difficult video games. Hn," Deidara announced.

"All special children have their inhuman gifts, Dei-Kun." Sasori cooed almost sadisticly.

"Oh _shuttup!" _Well, at least _they're_ back to normal.

"Whatever Deidara," He said, hands on his hips doing a Diva-level pout. "Just because you were in the looney bin doesn't mean I have to treat you lightly." It took a few blinks from all of us to realize what he just said.

"How'd you-" Deidara started.

"Who told you?" Yahiko almost growled, ready to pulverize whoever did.

"Hm? oh, no one. I read it on the internet." I don't know what it was, but it made me, Kisame and alittle bit of Itachi start laughing histarically. While Yahiko blanched and Deidara was hit with a giant wave of bashfullness.

-Later

The last weeks were unmentionable, uneventful, unbelieveable, ugh. Just, no. This isn't real.

Real, yes, real is my new least favorite word.

It's Saturday. Naruto and Sasuke are off- I dunno, trying to figure out what their sexual prefferences are. Yahiko said we might go 'play' in the woods for a while. Which would actually be pretty refreshing, everythings been doing nothing for so long, maybe we can just move on from this without drama- fuck I think I jinxed it. Or maybe it won't! yes yes, it probably won't!

Yahiko's pretty normal, well, normal for him. And normal for him is pacing around the house and doing nothing. So he's good.

I'm lounging on the couch. Not much to do. I could use Sasori to yell at right now. Or Deidara to start a snow-ball reaction of something. Or Itachi just to look at. Itachi's inhuman.

And Hidan's pretty damn fun, when he's normal. And he is normal- but that's supposed to be a problem. But maybe I'm digging way too deep into things, or maybe I'm jinxing things. Crap, fuck oh shit I know what's wrong, I'm insane. That's what it is, oh yes everything makes sense now. I am content. I understand everything.

This is how the Budda felt. I understand it all. Lessee, I'll use my new-found clarity to think... Hidan needs a hug. Yes, I need to hug him the next time I see him.

Yahiko's pacing, I don't know why he paces. I know nothings wrong, because he always does this. It's like a reflex of not getting to control anything with an iron fist- oh! that's why he has all those piercings. I feel like a God I can understand so much now.

I seem to be posing for noone now. Like I'm one of the pretty fifties ladies on those old couches with the weird hats and boas. And I'm bored, despite my new-found power of understanding.

Yahiko flopped on the couch next to me, looking rather restless. "Are you ready?"

"I think I'm insane." I say rather calmly.

"Then revertion is complete." He announced, crossing his arms and grinning cockily. "Common, lets go. We might be able to round everyone up." Oh, yay. Hidan to hug!

I bounced myself off the couch and we walked out of the house. The weather had been pretty mild, and very little rain despite Yahiko saying that it usually rains alot here. Ohhh, maybe I brought the sunshine~

I grabbed his arm as we trodded down the hill. Okay, time to take my high down a few notches. No need to smile like a pyscho the rest of my life. Yahiko can help me, he's admirabley experianced with pyschos.

I feel something toning me down, then I look up and I notice Kakuzu and Hidan are down in front of us. Hidan's sitting on a rock and Kakuzu's trying to talk to him. I say trying because Hidan looks like he's in a diffrent world.

Insanity high tuning out, because I know somethings about to happen. Yahiko gives me a glance as he pulls us over to the two. "Kakuzu?"

Our eldest elder looks up at us in almost a glare. That's the frusterated face he usually has when dealing with Hidan, but there's something new about this one. "I think we need to talk.

Hidan chuckled alittle. Well, at least he isn't screaming. Yahiko back-tracks a few spaces, and Kakuzu comes up to talk to him. I move so that I'm still close to Hidan but can hear what they're saying.

"Ko," Hidan called. I went over to him.

"What've you been doing?" I asked, sounding rather motherly.

He laughed again. "Would you believe me if I didn't remember?" He said, he looks tired to all hell.

"Kakuzu?" I turned around, Yahiko was standing next to our also very tired-looking senior. "Kakuzu what happened to him?"

Kakuzu took his face out of his hands. Brushed back some strands of hair that was falling out of his bandana. "What just happened- was I found him at his house with a rope around his neck."

There was no real emotional reaction to that sentance, but I looked back to Hidan who yawned loudly and tryed to crack his back. I just started smiling, and stood up on my knees and hugged his shoulders.

-Akatsuki Alley

School's closed of course. But the alleys always open. Yahiko was at the store using the payphone to start calling all Akatsuki. I'm letting Kakuzu take a break. He's off walking his stress away, so I get to look after our currently suicidal member.

"And then, like, the cheif kept fucking cursing me out. And the kid was hiding behind a tree, and, so I couldn't stop laughing, and-" He also currently won't stop talking.

He kept yapping and yapping, untill I think he ran out of stuff to yap about. Yahiko's still getting ahold of people and Kakuzu still hasn't come back yet. "Hidan?"

"Whaaat?" He groaned, sighing, and probably realizing how much trouble he's in now.

"What was your girlfriends name?" I asked. "Chi-chi. That you kept insisting wasn't your sister?"

He puckered his lips like he was thinking really hard. "Um, her name was Chevonne. She's techinically was my cousin. And her name was a mouth full, so I couldn't ever say it when I was younger."

So cute, and it makes sense too. I keep conversation going so nothing else happens. "Now, what's your favorite animal?"

"Uhhhh," He's too dazed to realize the idiocy of the question. "I wanna say Zebra, because they act all retarded and look stupid. But Dinosaurs are awsome. And Dogs eat people, soooo." Why does he keep making me laugh?

Thudding from the other side of the wall and a mini stampede arrives. First ones here are Tobi, Deidara and Itachi. "Hidoid!" Deidara cheers before scrambling over here.

Tobi excitedly follows after Deidara, where as Itachi comes by my side and sets a big bag of stuff down. "What's that?" I asked.

"I think we'll be camping here a few nights." Itachi said, sounding very positive of the fact. He pulled out a big princess pillow and gave it to me.

-Later

Deidara and Hidan are talking about pointless stuff, so I don't have to any more. We were later joined by Sasori and Kisame. Yahiko got back, and eventually, Kakuzu was done with his hours-long walk.

Itachi lit the candles scattered around the room/alley/place. It looks like a room now, with all the pillows, and blankets and crap. I actually fell asleep quite quickly. Like, the second I set a head on a pillow and got covered, I woke up and realized I'd passed out.

By the time I woke up, Itachi, Yahiko and Tobi were asleep too. Kisame and Kakuzu were in a corner keeping my side company, Kisame waved at me when I woke up. Deidara was seconds away from sleep, the only thing signalling he was still awake was the talk-like noises comming out of his mouth, and the fact that Sasori would tug at his hair whenever he shut his eyes. Because if Deidara goes to sleep, Sasori would have to talk to Hidan. Who didn't look like he'd tired at all.

I closed my eyes and willed caffine into my system. Then got up and crawled over. "Deidara can break now."

Sasori gave a thumbs up sign, and then let go of Deidara's pony-tail before turning around and laying down. Deidara didn't even comment, he was in Freddy Krugers turf now.

"What's keeping you awake Hidan?" I asked, still sounding sleepy.

"I dunno." He monotoned, sounding more bored then tired. "Nightmares, but I do wanna go to sleep."

"Do you need a nightlight?" I asked. And started biting the inside of my cheek to stay awake.

He seemed to wonder for a second. "Eh, I didn't try. The only one I ever had had clowns on it. And clowns scare the shit outta me."

Well, clowns scare the shit outta everybody. With their white faces, red noses, and the ability to fit into tiny cars. It's like- I dunno, super-Orochimaru with a cold... Wow, that vision _was_ scary. "Hn, well how hard have you tried."

"Uhhh, I took some pills." He recalled.

"How many?" I'm still dozing off.

"... Uhhhh, I think around seven."

That got me to open my eyes. And I also noticed Kisame and Kakuzu's background-noise conversation stop. "At a time?"

Hidan didn't answer that one. He was still remembering. "Maybe closer to ten. I dunno, the bottle was empty when I was done."

That got sense, and a second wind to hit me. I sat up a bit straighter and looked at him. "... How do you feel now?"

He did a half-sigh. "Eh, jittery. I-" Hidan's vocabulary probably doesn't have a word to explain.

In the corner of my eye I can see Yahiko moving. I think he heard the latest few sentances. "Hidan? how often has this been happening?"

He's thinking so hard now I think steams comming out his ears. "Everynight, for- uhhh, couple weeks. A few."

Kakuzu sighs behind me. And Yahiko's standing up to come over. "Hidan, I think you need help."

He laughs almost loudly. "Ya-hoo! Can I get Dara's old loony room?"

-The Next Day

_Sunday, I hate you._

_Sunday, I do~_

_Sunday, I'd rather-_

_wake-up with the flu._

Screw Hidan. I should get that loony bin room.

Hidan's emotions have deteriorated since last night. I think the word for why is- lessee, withdrawal? Yeah, when everyone started waking up, he was cranky as hell. Like, Sasori cranky. And with bigger muscles to do worse damage if he decides to hit you.

Well, he hasn't hit anyone yet. He killed this poor mouse with his fist though. Yeah, that's a bad sign.

The pillows were in neater piles now. And Hidan had been given most of them. But now all he wants to do is walk in circles and yell about God sucking. Yeah, weither the rumors were true before or not, Hidan is now offically a satanist. Or at very best he just hates God, but maybe more so in the sense of Mel Gibson when drunk.

Tobi keeps trying to start a conversation with him, but then Hidan says something perverted and evil. And Tobi ends up either weeping, or getting this look on his face like he's trying to decide which weapon he should kill him with. I don't know, Tobi head just scares me.

It's been a few hours since waking up. Yahiko told me that Tsunade knows were doing something here, so there's no fear of getting kicked out. And Jiraiya and Mom both know we're doing damage control with something. No need for details quite yet though. Earlier Naruto and Sasuke played delivery boys and got us food. The only time Hidan stopped yelling.

Untill now, now Hidan's finally sat down and isn't screaming. Which might be worse. Yahiko went over to him. "Hidan, you need to tell us what's wrong."

Hidan peeked through fingers to glare at him. "Fuck you,"

"He's been addicting for weeks. That's what's wrong." Kakuzu called, he was leaning against the wall next to Hidan. And had been following him around before. "You realize that's stopping now Hidan?" Kakuzu's reply was a growl. Or maybe just a hoarse groan, hard to tell.

I remember one girl I knews sister got addicted to sleeping pills, apparently, it's the drug that you can legally buy in any store on the planet that's the one that's worst for you.

"Withdrawal symptoms for those are bad." Yahiko turned to listen to me. "Like, _really_ bad. The person might not survive without medical supervision."

Kakuzu lifted his head up. "So we have to take him to the Hospital?"

"No we _can't."_ Hidan growled, sounding clearer then before. "I had to fucking _beg_ those godforsaken cops not to take me to a foster home. If this gets out then I'm already five hundred miles away."

Great, another seperation threat. But I can think clear enough after so much experiance to know that leaving his only friends in the world right now is not what Hidan needs. "Well what then?"

"I've been taking them for two-motherfucking-weeks. It can't be that bad already."

"If you've been taking them dependantly it doesn't matter." Yahiko explained. Hidan just groaned again.

"...I feel sick."

Nice to be the informative one for once: "Nausa isn't really one of the symptoms for withdrawal."

"Well not _that_ fucking sick." He snapped, his pinkish eyes starting to look alittle red, all over, for that fact. "I just feel like fucking shit."

"What do you want to do?" Kakuzu asked him.

"I _want_ to go to sleep but-" Even Hidan could see where this was going.

Kakuzu held out his arm to help him up. "You'll have to pull a few all-nighters with us Hidan." Hidan groaned again so loud it sounded more like a demons purr. He grabbed Kakuzu's wrist and hoisted himself up.

The second he was on his feet something didn't look right. His eyes went blank and I could even see his body tense up, and he fell right back down. "Hidan!"

-Later

"Symptom number four." Sasori read. "The one in withdrawal will be likely to suffer from mild epileptic seizures."

"Isn't a seizure where you start shaking alot?" Tobi asked so curiously sweet he sounded like he was literally four years old.

"There are three levels of seizure. The first one is what Hidan had, which is really just an instance of the brain shutting down. And the reason why he recovered so shortly after."

Hidan was a utter wreak. He looked hungover laying across the pillows and holding his head. He wasn't talking anymore again, he looked like he was in too much pain. Kakuzu was next to him, and I'm guessing he's having the same feeling I am. I'd stage my own death before I was made to leave Hidan's side right now.

Sasori and Deidara were gone for less then five minutes to grab the collection of medical dictionaries no one wanted to buy that were on sale at the store. Deidara only went because Sasori's current nerve damage makes his hand-eye coordination fail him quite often. I'd go on about how hilarious it is to see Sasori act clumsy, but now is my time for stressing.

Lets see. Sasori lacking a nervous system. Deidara's mentally pyschotic and in need of medication. Hidan's in withdrawal for medication. Itachi has several life-threatening illnesses. Yahiko had leader-stress-disorder. Oh- and Kisame's a blue baby. Yes, yes, yes. I don't think they've discovered the mental disease Tobi has yet. And Kakuzu is just plain worried sick over Hidan. And I never thought of Kakuzu as the worrying type.

Then there's me. And I'm insane. I want to go back to the content insane right about now, I liked that part.

While Kakuzu was glued to Hidan's side, Yahiko was more of like on a rubberband. He'd walk away to see me, and give an update of his latest worries. Then he'd be back next to Hidan. Watching him like we were counting down the minutes to spontanious combustion. This is almost like when we just broke into that Asylum. But it's diffrent still-

I'm more scared about this. I'm more worried about this. I'm more freaking out about this.

I want to cry more about this.

"Konan?"

I looked up, Mom was in the doorway with her best doctor smile. Holding a medical bag and one other bigger case that probably has a few things the Hospital doesn't know she borrowed.

She tip-toed through our mass of tired, huddled group and knelt down next to Yahiko infront of Hidan. "Hey, you're Hidan. Heard you did some pretty stupid stuff."

Hidan cracked a eye open. "And you are?"

"Konan's Momma, call me Yugito. Yugito Nekohi." She was getting her cocky tone, the one she uses for all the druggies she sees.

Hidan snickered. "Neko- haha, ura' pussy!"

Hidan continued to laugh at himself as Mom's grin got wider. "Can I take your hand?" She took it before the reply came and stuck a needle in his wrist.

"OW!"

-Later

Hidan was hooked up to something- Uhhh, I think it's a feeding tube actually. Hidan's appitite completely dissapeared after the seizure, and Mom said the tube would be easiest for him anyway.

Hidan just keeps tugging at it and complaining. Which is getting closer to normal for him. This time it's Deidara, Tobi and Kisame who have passed out. The sun just went down a couple minutes ago.

Mom sat down inbetween me and Yahiko. "So these are the ones you've been fretting over this whole time, huh?"

I smiled nervously. And looked over at Hidan. He still looks miserable, but in the bored way. "I love em, what can I say?"

She smiled back. "I'm crushing on Hidan myself, the little charmer." She mocked. "But there were some scars on that boys wrist."

Yahiko looked absolutely grumpy. "We've been through too much too quick."

Mom just kept smiling and patted his shoulder. "I'll come back later tonight. But I want all of you to get some sleep." She got up. "Behave as best as you can." She paused while she was heading for the exit, "Pussy's got claws~" Hidan made a shrieking noise while Itachi started laughing. Sasori's just in the corner, miserable at the fact that Deidara and Tobi are asleep on his legs.

-Next Day

"Ow, ow, ow, ow," Were the first noises in my ears when I woke up- roughly around noon. It's school time, but everyone's still in the alley. "I want to gouge out my brain with a butterknife." Hidan groaned. I turned over to watch. Yahiko seemed to be using my head as a weight on his legs to keep him from jumping off the walls.

"You're just _bored._ The chaos in your mind does very little to entertain." Deidara spoke from experiance. "Hn, yes, you need some entertainment!"

Sasori was up and pacing the room instead of Yahiko. He pulled a small puppet out of his bag. Untangling the string in seconds before dropping it to the floor. He made it bow, and then do a series of funny gestures.

Hidan watched and then laughed after a couple of seconds. "Hee-hee, it's a mini-pinocchio~"

"A very ugly Pinocchio." Sasori commented. "This is from when my Father told me to pick out random parts, and then he put them together. I liked how the bulgy eyes looked in my hand. So that's why I chose those for starters."

It did a few other rather entertaining things that Sasori himself wouldn't ever do, even if he was drunk, stoned and delirious. Before comically skipping over to Hidan, who was still resting his hurting head on Kakuzu's leg. And the puppet popped him in the forehead, which made him whine. Before Sasori somehow manuvered it through a flip and back into his bag.

"You're playing with your puppets again Sasori?" Kakuzu commented after Hidan stopped deliriously laughing at the previous display.

"I guess so, they don't feel anything, so I guess we have things in common now." He explained. Then he hunched down infront of Hidan, and shook little Ugly-Pinnoch in Hidan's face and made him laugh more. "If you give me a happy smile, you'll get candy."

Hidan smiled wide and stupidly. Sasori smirked back and dug into his bag. He handed Hidan a little wrapper with something round inside. Hidan popped it in his mouth without second thought and then spat it out after two seconds. "What was that?"

"That was kelp-flavored." Deidara and Tobi both started laughing histaric. Kisame just woke up, and so in his drowsiness is mumbling to Itachi about us all being insane.

Yes, and insane is good. Insane is _content~_

This is what the hippies of 1970 thought like.

-Later

"Why, Naruto?" Yahiko spoke into the phone. I could hear the loud, whining vioce on the other end. "It has to be quick."

Yahiko hung up on the poor boy. I was kicking me leg around. "So?"

"Naruto's got a cold."

Ha! That's hilarious! "And?"

"He wants _you._" I blinked. Why has my heart suddenly warmed up and I feel so fuzzy? And to think Yahiko wouldn't have even called home if I hadn't begged him to escort me to the bathroom.

Itachi and Kisame came up behind us. "Hey, Itachi wants to come." Kisame said. Itachi smilingly waved at us.

"How's Hidan doing?" I asked, like much could have changed from when I was in there five minutes ago.

"He's about to finally fall asleep. He won't even notice you're gone." As much as I'd love to sit next to Hidan and talk to him while he cusses and whines. I miss Naruto-Kuns.

"Then it's the three of us off?" I asked. Yahiko nodded.

"Zetsu said he'd drop us off." Itachi said. He most obviously is missing his brother. Who at the remembering of him- I instaintly imagine him being tortured by a stuffy-nosed Naruto. Which sounds entertaining to watch.

On que a honking noise from up ahead. Zetsu waved at us from inside his car. I wacked Yahiko's arm. "Race!"

-Jiraiya's House

"An' dhen Kiba juz _sneezed_ on meh!" Naruto stuffily whined. "I knew I wuz gunna die dhen!"

"And he kept me awake all night _whining_ about it." Sasuke said. Pouting in Naruto's frog-shaped fuzzy chair.

"I wuz dying!" Naruto insisted.

"You were _congested!"_ Sasuke groaned. Itachi was cracking up, and Yahiko stood in the doorway, likely depressed that he was legally related to the snot-nosed yellow fluff ball, that was currently wrapped up in navy pajamas and lots of blankets. Surrounded by tissues and some '_dherapootic'_ stuffed animals.

Almost hard to believe this little ball of clothes was the one crying like a wittle baby because he had a telepathic realization that the grumpy little cute-assed fucker in the chair over there decided to run away to Orochi-fuck-you.

Yahiko moaned and then came over to me and tapped my shoulder. "I'll be walking around outside."

"Yu-kouz westess!" I'm not sure what Naruto just said. I think it could have been a porn movie title. But moving on. Yahiko leaves the room, and Naruto just keeps talking. "Sus-gay!"

"What?"

"Uoh duk."

Sasuke blinked a few times. "_What?"_

"Ouhg duack!"

"Is that even english?"

Naruto took a deep breath and tried to position his tongue so he could speak clearly. "Yoo suck!"

Sasuke got out of the chair and came over to wack Naruto. After the wack, Naruto sneezed in Sasuke's face. The following was then Sasuke scratching at his face and whining like a little girl. About four hours later, Sasuke complained of a sore throat.

-Later

"Your brother is impossible." I made very clear to Itachi on our way out.

"He's a spoiled little brat." Itachi said, sounding slightly proud.

It's raining now that we're leaving. Back at the alley the brought in a tent for if it did. So no worry about that. And however me and Itachi have both agreed to return to Hidan's pyschotic side now, the ten-mile walk is all the more unpleasing in the rain. "We have to find Yahiko. He's late."

"He might've went to the woods when the rain started." Itachi said. "Or the bar, the woods sound more like him though."

I grin, why does that make sense? "I'll look. Go see if Madara or Anko will give us a ride." Itachi nodded and patted my shoulder before jogging off to the Bar.

Ahhh, okay. This'll be the last of it, right? wait- fuck am I jinxing it again? dammit.

I go towards the clump of woods, I'm not sure where I'm supposed to look here. And- ... and the rains getting harder. Dammit.

I pace around in circles. Waiting for someone to turn up, insert fifteen minutes of me getting very wet and very annoyed here.

I'm sitting on a rock now. Wondering why Itachi's taking so long in the bar, why Yahiko's missing, and why the author of my life can't magic up an umbrella for me. Wow, this is cliche.

I'm pouting, very effectively. This would be a good picture, wouldn't it? I'm cold- and actually. All the water makes me wonder when the last time I showered was. Damn, I might've become a slob by being surrounded by guys all the time.

While I'm sitting here, moping, and hoping I don't smell. I finally get the next plot development. I figure in the rain, comming down the hill- Jason? Michael? The Collector? Kishimoto? Another random rapist? No, better, Yahiko!

"There you are asshole." I grumble, jumping up. "I've been looking all over for you!" Well, technically I looked for two minutes and then sat down and pouted- but.

I can see him grin as he gets closer. "Yea, sorry, I got sidetracked." It isn't untill he's right up to me that I notice how messy he is.

"What happened to you?" His shirt, coat, and pants are covored with mud, but anything else he might have had seems to have been washed away by the rain.

He wiped his face. "Nothing, ran into Kagura's cronies."

I raised an eyebrow. "You beat em' up?"

His grin got snarky. "Yes, actually. They wanted to fight me for you. How could I not?"

I giggled, which sounds weird considering I'm grumpy and soaked. "I thought I was rid of them."

"They must've been off taking wrestling classes. Not that it helped any, wrestling is pretty pathetic compared to karate."

"You know karate?"

He sighed, and the started glaring at the clouds. "My dad was a teacher. But what about you?"

"I dunno, I'm still concerned you have a internal injury that'll rupture and cause me more hell next week."

He sighed again and sat down on my rock. "Too much drama. I'd think you'd get scared away again."

"I told you, I figured out I'm insane." I hunched infront of him. He actually does look like shit. "They should've aimed for the jewelry. You'd cry more over a lost earing then the rip when it was pulled out."

He rested his head in his hand. "Yeah, thanks. Now I feel like crap, and girly. Maybe I should forbid anymore gay jokes." He pondered for a minute. Before he sighed, again. Maybe he's just trying to catch his breath. "What made you want to stay?"

"Hm?"

"Well, more directly- you were against breaking into an asylum." He noted. "You were this close to walking away."

"Hn, walking away wouldn't solve anything." I said, like suddenly I'm mature. "Why?"

"Just wondering." He said more quietly now. Now he just looks tired.

I stood up, my shins don't seem to have the strength to hold my upper body comfortably. "Now for me." I said. "Why are you such a persistaint _leader?"_

He looked up at me, and his grin came back. "You really want to know?" I nodded insistaintly. He chuckled. "... When I met them, I just wanted to help out. It started with Itachi- and you can't say no to Itachi." True, true. Where is the hot-ass fucker anyway? Sitting infront of Madara's fireplace sipping coco? "I couldn't leave them alone. And more people just started adding to the group- well, it was a group before I knew it. Eventually, when we were all really together, I just looked at us and was like: I can't let anything ruin this." That's, well, sweet. And, well, it sounds like something anyone would do. But the way he tells it puts a purer meaning to it.

I wanted to sit down, but the ground is kind of mud and he's stolen the nearest seat. I just crossed my arms, feeling awkward. "Why'd you even start?"

He smiled, in a diffrent way. "I'm a over-caring person. Before my parents died, I had a brother, he was always really sick and-" I think the rest is depressingly easy to figure out.

I tryed to this of something to say. "... What was his name?"

He smiled alittle, like he was remembering something. "Nagato. He was the shy one. The one his big brother always had to be looking out for" He was quiet again, and the smile faded.

"It wasn't your fault-" That was the corniest thing every to say.

He tryed to smirk again. He was still staring at the ground. "Doesn't make me feel any better... I guess that's why I took all the guys under my wing... I wanted to help them and try to-... redeem myself or something..."

The rain seemed to pick up is a overly dramatic way. "Well, you've been doing a damn good job..."

The smirk started fighting on itself again. "Thanks... but there's the one thing that's been buggin me."

"What's that?" Now words are just spilling out of my mouth.

"... I don't know why I saved _you_." He tryed to look up at me. "If I'd just left you alone, you would've stayed with that bitch Kagura and never given any of us a second thought..." Well, that _might _true. "What made me want to try and snap you out of it?"

"I don't know..." I stood there, deep in my mind begging for fate to give me an umbrella. This was too cliche. "I hadn't ever thought there was anything, well, so _evil_ about me. Untill- well, you started to point it out."

Yahiko stared at me. For a split second I thought he might get mad... He stood up alittle shakily and I almost had to go over and help him up. He looked me back in the eye and was grinning again. "You're such a Princess."

"Why _do_ you even care?"

His gaze fell again for a moment. He leaned towards me, looking tired again. "Because somewhere along the line of trying to be your friend I fell in love with you,"

"Why?"

He started leaning into me for support. "Cause you showed me that that my reasons meaned something. That miracles are allowed to happen." _Miracles. _A more then cliche concept. But better then the word 'cliche' . "And sometimes they just really do." his face was wedged in my neck now. I was almost sure he was falling asleep.

The rain was letting up, alittle. Still pouring though. But that wasn't what I could think about. Right now, I'm just relishing in how right Mom was with those constaint, no longer lying assurances I would be happy here. I pushed his shoulder. "Wakeup," When he brought his head back I smacked a kiss on him.

-**End Chapter**-

WEEEEEEEEEEE!

MY MOMMY GAVE ME MIDOL B-CUZ I HAD CRAMPS! AND WHEN I TOOK IT- IT GAVE ME A CAFFINE HIGH!

WEEEEEEEEEEEE!

AND I CAN GET ON MY DEVIANT ART AGAIN. YAY!

MIDOL IS MY FRIEND! EVERYTHING IS IN PRETTY COLORS AND 3D! AND WE WENT TO THE STORE AND MY FACE WAS LIKE THIS THE WHOLE TIME

8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D 8D

IF THERE'S SOMETHING OFF ABOUT THIS CHAPTER, IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE OF THIS! WEEEEEE!

8D... THERE WUZ ALOT OF SCENE CHANGES IN HERE!

(Several changes were made to the ending of this chapter to try and keep it as non-corny as possible. I think I still failed pretty epicly though XD)


	18. Angels and Cranes

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, Akatsuki, or anything else used in here. Including 'Take me or Leave me' Which was written by amazing Jonathan Larson!

The countdown! CHAPTER 18! The penultimate chapter!... Eh, I just like the world 'penultimate''. Because I'm the only one in my family that knows what it means. But techinically, the next chapter is the last chapter. But then there's a epilouge. Which makes the story end of a perfect 20!

Last chapter had alot of scene changes. I just couldn't think of any filler. And I was on a caffine high during most of the Hidan-is-a-druggy parts. Yeah, about that. I listened to Paris Hilton at full-blast for a while, and then I was all better.

XD That Midol is STRONG!

But yeah, I can get on Deviant art again! So far so good at least- You see. I'd been looking for the Wedsday spoiler for Naruto chapter 509. Because I was too impatient to wait to read it on Thursday.

I got to the site, and I was looking at the untranslated page scans. While trying to see through the bad quality, the site was re-directed to a porn site XD

But then I was like- wait, if porn can show up on this computer- So I tried my DeviantArt, which had been blocked due to nudity. And- VOILA!

Meanwhile, I had 230 DeviantWATCH messages, all I did though, was go to Annria2002's latest chapter for her animated Heroes ComeBack Doujin. And, then, I started CRYING.

Those things have made me sad and depressed before. But the latest chapter- TEARS WERE DOWN MY FACE! BLOODY HELL!... Oh, right, moving on. TIME FOR THE CHAPTER! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!

-**Angels and Cranes**-

"Come on, take a bite." I waved the full spoon around. "Aren't you hungry?"

Hidan's bright pink eyes followed the moving spoon, "I'm motherfuckin' starving. I just know I'll puke it all back up."

About a week- well, almost two weeks. Like, a week an a little bit of a half, it's Wendsday, and this started on a Saturday, and a week passed and so then- Anyway. "Puking days are probably over already. Do you want Mom to put the feeding tube back in you?"

Hidan paled, and he's already pretty pale, so he's nearing Tobi's realm. I spent a day and hours of staring at a cookbook to get this concotion right. It's supposed to be sweet potatoes and chestnuts. According to Naruto it looks delicious and Jiraiya almost cried when I said it was for Hidan.

Kakuzu's sitting on a discarded pillow from Hidan's giant pile. "I hate that stuff, it's too sweet."

"Sweet?" Moaned Hidan. "But I like sweet~" He cried, reaching a hand out longing for my little spoon.

A sound of golden bells. My poetic term for Deidara's laugh. He's in the far corner behind us watching like it's the latest hit TV show.

I hear the clacking of Mom's heels as she comes in for her check-up. "How's the specimen feeling today Konan?"

I turn to look at her, "He won't eat cause he thinks it'll make him throw up."

She puts on her thin green gloves, more so to intimidate Hidan then to do anything. "At this stage your body has settled into it's own chemicals and your nearing completion." She pauses and bends down to his sitting level. "Translated to idiotinese, you won't throw up and you're good to do whatever you want now. If, that doesn't involve riding moving carnival rides or jumping out of windows."

Hidan half-rolled his eyes. She usually slaps him for that. "Now I have to edit my to-do list."

Mom poked him with something like she usually does when he's consumed with something, "This is going to be tested. If everythings out of your system, I think you can sleep indoors again."

"Fuck, and I was making friends with the motherfuckin' rats in here!" He turned to the corner. "Sorry Sori,"

The grumpy red chibi flipped him off without looking up from his dollies.

Mom stood up and put the syringe in a bag. "I'll be keeping a close eye on all of you, after this okay?"

"Yes Mommy," Me and Hidan both said in union. She smirked before twirling around and leaving. I raised my spoon again. "Eat,"

Hidan looked at it, after three, quick blinks. He lunged for the spoon and bowl. Tackling me and taking them. "Mineminemineminemine!"

He shoveled contents in his mouth inbetween yelling the same word over and over and either feeling me up or attempting to tickle me. One of those. Itachi and Kisame returned from rations collecting and joined Deidara in the background laughing.

-One Week Later

Hm~ I've made the cranes I wanted to get to. 12-thousand to be exact. I made a thousand for everyone that needs one. A wish for Yahiko, that he finds something to hold onto for himself. A wish for Itachi, to have all his wishes come true. A wish for Kisame to find himself. A wish for Hidan, to find solitude in self of mind. A wish for Kakuzu to care for the perfection he's got more often. A wish for Deidara, for the love in his heart to stop forgetting we're all right here. A wish for Sasori to see that everything he wants is right infront of him. A wish for Tobi to stay just exactly the way he is. A wish for Zetsu to forget the world and hang with us in wonderland. A wish for Madara, to smile more often, and even a wish for Sasuke, to stop acting like an idiot.

And a wish for me, to never let them go.

Vibrating on my bed to wake me up. I roll over and start moaning. "Naruto, get off." My new first words everyday.

"Wakey-wakey-wakey!" He yells, then he decides to tackle me. "Yugi-Nii-Chan's making pancakes!"

He pulls me into a sitting position and then moves to my floor so he can continue hopping like some kind of frog. I grab my pillow and ceremoniously hit him in the head with it. He just laughs and trys to his me back, but I just pull him in and try to smother him with it.

"Hey, kids." We look up. Yahiko's standing in the doorway, already dressed, and probably looking way more mature then us. "Sandbox's closed. Up n' attum."

Naruto pulls me into standing before he leaves the room and slams my door. Still laughing out in the hallway. I rush over to my dresser and pull out something I can put on quick, ultra-faded jeans cut to the knees and a shirt that was originally a really short dress.

My cranes are in a row and both sides of my vanity mirror. I've had to remake my paper flower twice, but the paper I used this time is so strong, Moses could close the sea up on me and it'd still hold.

I left my room- backtrack- return, grab my backpack, _then_ exit. And I scuttle down the stairs.

Mom's setting the pancakes in everyones plates. Naruto tries to take a bite out of his before it's out of the pan. And I'm only 47% sure Mom didn't hit the hot pan against his chin on purpose.

"And then, my editor said: Who's this Mary-Sue blonde in chapter three? and I told him I'd send him a link on the intro-web." Jiraiya continued on with his story.

"And what did you link him to Jiraiya?" Yahiko droaned on, Jiraiya's told several stories about him making his editor blanch.

Jiraiya grinned. "Tsunade Senju's bio on the schools website." I started laughing, while Yahiko face palmed. Naruto started staring at Jiraiya, silent and agasp. And slowly getting paler and paler.

"Pervy." Naruto spoke, awe-struck. "Did you write a sex scene with old lady Tsunnie in it?"

Jiraiya swallowed a large bite from the pancake. "Not till' next volume buddy. I remember from experiance that she isn't the most easy lady to get ahold of."

Now Naruto was blanching, and I was the one staring in awe. Yahiko just sunk into his chair, trying to hide his laughing. While Mom turned around smiling widely. "Syrup, anyone?"

-At School

"AND THEN the little runt started YELLING at me and I was like- hn-... uhhh, Well I don't remember the exact wording, but it was supposed to be a Boondocks refference!" Deidara ranted and raved as we stepped off the bus. Sasori was several paces behind us, ignoring the fact that he was the subject of this rant. Tobi seemed to be playing the part of 'The bitches best friend who always agrees with her'

Naruto had one hand holding Sakura Haruno's, and another tugging along Sasuke. And he was swinging his arms happily as they walked to their school. Itachi, Kisame, Hidan and Kakuzu, dismounted the bus behind them.

Due to a cow in the road. The bus had been delayed. So we then ended up comically sprinting for our classes when the bell rang seconds later.

Kakashi Hatake allowed me and Yahiko to avail the tardy slip, for the soul reason that me and him rushed into the classroom seconds before he himself did. We bowed, headed for his seats, and then announced that Coach Guy would be estactic when he heard of our running skills... Gulp.

Kakashi lectured about the first presidents and/or kings of various places for an hour, untill the bell rang. Kakashi stopped us as we passed. "Do you want Coach Guy to learn of your amazing running skills?"

Me and Yahiko shook our heads slowly.

Kakashi picked up a file. A _big_ file. He stifled through it, and then opened a drawer. He pulled out the thickest book I've ever seen and handed it to us. "This is the entire history of grammar. There are exactly seven grammar mistakes in it. Find and fix them by next Monday, and I'll be so content, I might just forget all about boasting about you two."

Yahiko stared at the book. Then he took it out of his hands, and held it as best as anyone could hold a fifty-pound book. You could tell the wrinkle by his eye was a grin behind the surgical mask as he waved us off.

Outside the classroom. I looked up at Yahiko. "Well?"

Yahiko looked at the foot-this book in his arms. "... Itachi might owe me something. And he's been saying that he always has nothing to do in the early mornings."

Meanwhile, in Gym. Which at least for today we were safe in. "HELLO STUDENTS! I AM HAPPY TO SAY THAT TODAY IS A BEAUTIFUL DAY FULL OF YOUTH AND POWER! AND SO IT IS YOURS TO DO YOUR BEST IN!"

Many groans from all every student that was currently standing here, in the required Gym uniform, and a few sobbs from a few spaces down from me.

"NOW THEN!" Guy seems to feel like yelling today. "I WILL START THE JOGGING LINE WITH THE TALLEST!" Oh, the sadness. "BLUE YOUTH! BEGIN!"

Kisame sighed. But he's pretty used to the 'tallest starting' by now. He squats down for a final stretch, and then jumps up to race around the room.

Wind seemed to blow Guy's Moe haircut. His eyes shined up, and he started to tear. "...Beautiful, just, beautiful." Guy whipped around, and his thumbs-up followed Kisame racing around his room. "HOSHIGAKI! I WILL REMEMBER YOUR NAME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!"

Kisame wasn't running fast enough for us to miss his groan. Guy's said that several times. Kisame would die before Guy remembered his name for more then five seconds. Maybe it would have to from being eaten alive by sharks too.

Later, Orochimaru, whose fake theatrics were still going full-stong in pretend mourning for his very much alive daughter. (We visited her in the pokey last weekend.) Orochimaru was currently in the mourning stage of silence. And he would only talk when he was telling people what they should do today. Which now was to be landscapes.

I tried to make a farm house, that looked like a recolor of Jiraiya's place. Orochimaru doesn't comment on the pictures now, except sometimes for (According to Yahiko) his second-favorite student.

Sasori came up after me and Yahiko. His picture was a ship that looked like the Titanic against a sunsetted 'landscape' sea. "Beautiful, Sasori. Your pictures warm my heart." That did _not_ sound right comming out of his mouth.

After that was Tobi, who excitedly displayed what looked like a finger-painted picture. "This is a colorful fairy meadow!"

Orochimaru nodded his head. Then it was Deidara's turn. He'd made a Fall meadow full of molting trees and a few woodland creatures in the distance.

Orochimaru nodded...

Deidara looked up at Orochimaru, no telling what was going on inside the scattered thoughts of his gold-covored brain. Then he looked at Tobi, and then Sasori who was returning to his seat. Then back to Orochimaru again.

Deidara put down his painting, and got up to stand on the top of Orochimaru's desk. "What the _hell_ does Sasori have that I don't!"

Orochimaru looked up at him, and tryed to give a surprised face. However the moment before he assumed his theatrics he'd had a 'I knew you'd do this one day' look.

Sasori stopped and turned to look at Deidara. Who continued on his ranting. "That picture sucked! The sky looked like it was done with crayons and the water was all one color!"

From my spot next to him, I could see Sasori pose to begin his 'Why I'm better then you' speech. "I'm sorry Deidara. But after you put me into a coma and I lost all feeling in my body, it's a tad bit hard to control my brush strokes."

"_I_ did?" Deidara yelled from atop the desk. "It's because of _you_ you got hurt. You were too busy trying to get me to stand before your bloody hunk-of-junk car blew up _you_ were the one that got blown away by it! hng. Sasori Akasuna, you are nothing but a hypocritic, attention-seeking, spoiled, midget, _control freak!_"

Sasori, whose loss of nerve control seems to also prevent him from hiding his blush, is silent. Along with everyone else in the room. Orochimaru's white face is starting to turn red also. "...Pfft," He tries to hold it in.

Suddenly, Tobi raises his arms in cheer. "YAY DEIDARA-SEMPAI!" Orochimaru lost all control and fell out of his chair laughing histarically.

...

LATER ON!

"Motha-fuckin' _WHAT?" _Hidan yelled, and then changed to the same state Orochimaru has been in since we left class.

Now, in lunch. Deidara's -um 'stand up' performance has spread throughout the entire school. Deidara, however probably beaming with pride, is acting like nothing happened. And even having a one-sided conversation with Sasori, whose face now offically matches his hair and hoodie~

"Moving on," Yahiko shakily announced. Apparently embarressed to all hell that he's sitting at the same table as Deidara. "So, what about you guys' class activity?"

Kakuzu groaned. "Hidan got lectured by Asuma Sarutobi in Science."

"That lazy motherfucker is just a dull pieca' shit!" Hidan announced after he immidiantly stopped laughing. "He told me ta' stop writting stuff about Satan in my notebook!"

"_Were_ you writting stuff about Satan in your notebook?" Yahiko asked, getting ready for lecture mode, dissapointed one of those rumors might be true.

"Hell no stupid-ass shit-faced fucker!" Hidan swore, glaring at Yahiko for even assuming such. "Satan's a whiney little bitch! I was writting my prayers for Jashin-Sama!"

Deidara stopped talking to give Hidan a WTF look, while Kakuzu groaned, Yahiko raised an eyebrow, and for some reason, Itachi and Sasuke were laughing. "...Hidan, who's Jashin?"

Hidan's face calmed and he blinked. "Jashin-Sama is my Lord." He said so innocently, I imagined him in my head turning his head in a circle and then spitting pea-soup.

"Kakuzu," Yahiko asked. "Who is Jashin?"

"He won't stop talking about him." Kakuzu groaned. "He's been talking my ear off about him all week."

Hidan looked at us, dumb-founded. "How do none of you know about Jashin-Sama?" Itachi and Sasuke started laughing louder- I've actually never heard Sasuke have a honest laugh before- Apparently the genius Uchiha brothers know who Jashin-Sama is.

Kakuzu groans louder. "You talk about him like he's a all-powerful anime's leading bi-shonen and you're his love interest!"

Hidan glared at our elder. "Heathen! Jashin-Sama hates gay people!"

Kakuzu's head banged on the table. "Hidan... Why do I put up with you?"

I have no idea. After our last fit of drama, Hidan's moved in with Kakuzu, and I swear, one night I looked down at their house and swear there was blood on one of the windows.

Lunch ended with Naruto interrogating Sasuke on who the hell Jashin is. And if he's at all related to Charlie Sheen. We all split up and me and Yahiko joined Sasori and Itachi in Science.

Asuma was moaning when we entered. His desk looked cluttered, and for some reason, his trash can was overflowing with dead bugs. "Mr. Sarutobi? What happened here?" Itachi asked.

Asuma looked close to crying. "He carved something into my desk. I only thought of it as something to be fixed untill-... Where are they comming from!"

I blinked, confused. All four of us went over to look at his desk. Carved into the front was 'I call thee lord for a gift of punishment. Pain and horror for all those who crawl, death will befall the crawlers that join and die here.'

While we read. Several flies came into the room, and flew over Asuma's desk, and then died. Falling out of the air and onto his desk.

Well all then decided to return to our own desk. And we all made note to check our own desks for any writting or dead things.

Asuma seemed miserable about his current curse, and most of his chemicals were ruined by bug carcusses. So we learned how numbers are turned into letters that are turned into chemicals today.

Later on, we traded Itachi and Sasori for Hidan and Tobi in Math. Iruka Umino was quite cheery as he talked about the numbers I hated.

Hidan was bored, and rocking back and forth in his chair. Moaning, and I tried not to wonder if they were chants.

Tobi was attempting to learn, and kept staring at the board with a concentrating, determined face. He farted several times.

Yahiko was doing fine with all the science babble. While I named off a few careers in my head that had nothing to do with dealing with numbers.

... And then we went to Homeroom!

I was joint-hugged/smashed by Deidara and Kisame. And then Tobi took it as a group hug and joined in. After those few minutes of suffocation and attempted murder in the first degree, Zetsu walked in and broke it up.

"Boys, we all know Konan's a pretty girl, but when they say no, you watch from afar, okay?" Deidara whined and objected, while Kisame comicly slumped away and Tobi cocked his head.

"Thank you," I said, breathing finally.

"No problem ma'am." He patted my shoulder. "Okay class, Principal Tsunade wants you to work out the mathmatical aspects of everyday life. So today we'll be researching common poems." Everyone chuckled as we went to our seats. Zetsu wrote some things on the board.

"Mister Zetsu!" Tobi yelled as he raised his hand.

Zetsu turned around and blinked at him. "Yes Tobi?"

"Is that letter an A or an O?" He pointed to a word on the board. Which most clearly read 'Look'

"...Um, it says L.O.O.K." Zetsu said, Probably not wanting to say the word look, because that may lead to 'at what?'

"Oh, I thought it might be 'Loak' " Tobi explained.

Zetsu blinked some more. "...What's a 'Loak' Tobi?"

Tobi looked at him a few seconds before answering. "I just thought that would be a cool video game character name! 'Loak'. And then he could have the ablity to look at stuff specially. Wouldn't that be cool?"

Zetsu stared at Tobi with what could only be pure wonder for a few moments. "...Yes, Tobi. 'Loak' is a good video game character name..."

Tobi smiled proudly as everyone gave him weird looks. Deidara banged his head on his desk for knowing him, and I just bit my lip and listened to the lessons.

Other then Zetsu doing the usual of telling Hidan to stop talking to himself, Yahiko to stop sign-languaging some of the answers, and explaining to Tobi why 'the meany old teacher told Mary her lamp couldn't come with her to school.' Class ended normally, loud chatting from the members surrounding me as we walked outside together. Sasori still wasn't replieing to anything Deidara yapped about, Hidan felt obliged to tell us the amazingness of Jashin-Sama while Kakuzu was the only one that still had the guts to tell him to shut up. And Kisame was talking to me about how scared he was of Hidan right now. Which was really scared, due to Itachi's detailed account of Asuma's curse.

We were outside and about to get on the bus when I saw Itachi stop Yahiko. I looked to where they were pointing- the strangely un-empty recess yard.

Apparently, Sasuke was in a intense brawl with someother kid. One that I actually regonize- wait, that's the boy that signed the 'Get Sasuke Back' petition all that while ago. Wow, they really _do_ like eachother. Yahiko and Itachi ran over to pull them apart. I got up to the fence to watch. Naruto was apparently discarded from the brawl as he was holding a rag on his face on the sidelines being tended to by Sakura and Hinata, who'd also signed that petition.

"Break it up you two!" Yahiko pulled them apart. Itachi was literally dragging Sasuke away kicking while Yahiko checked on Naruto.

Itachi brought Sasuke onto the other side of the fence next to me. "What was that one about Sasuke?"

Sasuke was looking like he wanted to plow through the fence and get back to the fight, his opponent currently being pulled away by two others. Itachi took his shirt sleeve and wiped some scratches on his face clean. "That loser Neji always picks on his cousin- Naruto went after him to back off." He clawed at the fence. "You should've seen it- he kicked Naruto's- _stupid_ ass. I wasn't just going to _stand_ there and-"

"I get it Sasuke." Itachi interupted. "But you shouldn't jump into stuff like that so quick, alright?"

Sasuke was writhing in his anger, Yahiko came around the fence with Naruto, who was about ten times worse in the bloody department. "Sasuke~" He moaned, with a fat lip. Then he comically opened his arms. "My hero!"

He jumped on Sasuke with a hug, which Sasuke's reply was several insults and other ways of telling him to let go. But then Sakura tearfully ran over and joined, and Hinata stood by, thanking and bowing rapidly.

"Those little idiots." Yahiko muttered. Holding his head and sighing.

Itachi laughed under his breath, watching Sasuke being hugged to suffocation. I had to smile a bit too.

_HOOONK. HONK HONK._

We twirled around, Kisame was begging the bus driver to wait _just a few seconds more._ While me and the boys had to chase after it.

-Later

We spent enough time chasing the bus that we were still panting throughout the small amount of time it took to get home. Me and Itachi successfully stumbled off the bus while Yahiko seemed to be able to maintain a modest setting of balance. Kisame was standing next to Itachi to help him _stand_ after that.

Naruto and Sasuke immidiantly took a seat on the porch of the bar. Panting, and I think Naruto was still bleeding from somewhere. I was about to go over there and check their damage, untill one member, who usually didn't take the bus because he lives right behind the school, caught my eye with his colorful clothes and signature hat that was glued to his head.

"Daddy!" Madara was on the porch, putting the bars garbage in a garbagecan when Tobi tackled him. "Aunt Tsunade said I can stay with you tonight!"

Madara took a deep breath to refill his lungs. "Okay son, that's nice, but please-" He weezed. "no hugging infront of the customers. They pay their tabs more often when they're scared of me."

"Okay!" Tobi yelled, very loudly. He turned around and started jumping up and down and waving. "BYE Konan-Chan BYE Itachi-Kun BYE Naruto-San BYE Sasori-Teme BYE Deidara-Sempai!"

Well, that was just cute- wait, what honorfic did he use for Sasori!

He runs into the bar as Madara heave a few more breaths. Sasuke turned to address him. "Cute kid,"

"Yeaaah," He groaned, finally being able to stand straight. But then he smiled, quite giddily. "And the cutest thing is- he's _your_ cousin!" Sasuke blanched, while Naruto started laughing.

I started my way up the hill. Somehow, the colorful house at the top keeps me from getting tired when I do this. And I know I've already ran up and down and across this thing at least a million times already.

Of course, it wasn't untill I was at the top and standing infront of the front door that I was stopped. Yahiko grabbed me from behind with his hands wrapping around my waist. "Where're you going? We're going to have a Sushi party at the bar."

"Let me put down my bag! gawd!" He chuckled in my ear before letting go. I pecked his cheek before I opened the screen door to discard my bag and yell that we'd be at the bar. When I turned around he was already heading down the hill. "What are we celebrating?"

"Hidan's broke his old record of how long going without a cast somewhere on his body!" He yelled back up. Wow, yeah, that's something to celebrate about.

I have to grin to myself and twirl in glee before heading down to help supervise my boys.

-**End Chapter**-

Yay! Happy filler chapter where nothing productive happened! YAY!

XD Lessee, I never thought I'd get anything about Jashin in here. But then I got an idea- and just had to roll wif it. Am I the only one, that when I heard the english voice actor for Hidan say Jashin- I thought it sounded like Charlie Sheen? Well, regardless, Naruto sure did.

Latest Naruto chapter: Holy crap Konan! You ARE epic! Wait- MADARAAAA! You stole Deidara's thunder! You lost an arm during battle and are also perfectly fine! (My sister keeps asking how Deidara was able to live through that and why blood wasn't pouring out of it horribley)

Meanwhile, actually, My step-sissies moving soon. I'm 83% sure I'll be keeping the computer. Otherwise, my Momma's gonna be _yelling~_

Next chapter will be the LAST chapter! but then there's the Epilouge, which is techinically the last chapter. But I like the fact of saying LAST CHAPTER! WOOO!

Chibi Akatsuki might take a few slow updates before I really get into it. Dawning of Twilight's progress is sure to slow since sissy's moving. And then I have three other stories that are hiatused... Hn.

Okay, The corner of Madara's face looked pretty much like Madara, but, Obito still seemed possible. And I don't like that- DAMMIT KONAN! JUST GRAB IT AND RIP IT OFF! YOU'RE KILLIN' US HERE!

Anyone willing to join me and RandomDustBunnyzAngel for if Masashi Kishimoto decides to make the Tobito theory true? We need japanese translaters of the threats, and to ask for food and directions- and some rich kids. Cause we'll need to buy the right nails to make the boat. Wait- if we have rich kids, they might be able to buy a boat. Or better yet- a jet... Hnn, but I still like the idea of building a boat, and naming it Teh Otaku Killerz.

Really, Masashi Kishimoto won't realize that if he does that- thousands of those strange, and possibly retarded Tobito believers will be able to get into Harvard. And then- then- GASP. They'll be qualified to run Wal-Mart! AND THEN THE WORLD WILL BE DOOMED! OH NOES!... Expect longer author notes next chapter. Because I don't put authors notes in epilouges... Cuz- I dunno. My rambling has a tendancy to ruin endings... Hnnnn, hey, if you wanna do something- How many chapters do you think Naruto is likely to end at? Hmmmm, Hnnnnn, Heeeeeee... I dunno... FUN FACT! Kakuzu's least favorite food is infact Sweet Potatoes with Cooked Chestnuts! (And his favorite food is Liver... ewwy, I thought Liver might be tasty untill my Mommy's boyfriend let me try it... Ewwy...)


	19. Fighting your Demons

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT OWN NARUTO! If I owned Naruto, I would be awsome. BUT I also would not be able to bring myself to hint at the Tobito Theory...

Yes, the Tobito Theory is so threateningly huge, the T's in both 'Tobito' and 'Theory' are capitalized...

TT... Haha, LOL... Anyway... NO AUTHORS NOTES IN THE EPILOUGE CHAPTER! Don't you love me? 

It might seem anti-climatic if I finish and post this at the same time as the last chapter, have I? at this point I do not know... But a note: The epilouge for this chapter was re-written, I originally wrote it back while I was writting, like, chapter FOUR. It said everything I wanted to say- but there was nothing WEEEEEE! about it. So it was re-written while I was during chapter, like, Fourteen...

XD but yay! This will be my second, finished story with correct grammar arrangements! The first one being Confessions of a Teenage Monster. (Go to Fan History Wiki and type in my username if you want to hear the story of my technical 'first finished story')

COATM is getting revised because Naruto's OOC in the first few chapters and I noticed some awkward moments/unexplained happenings after it was finished. SOS may be revised if I get to the point where I can't stand those teeny, tiny typos...

But Chibi Akatsuki will be the next projecto~ After that's done- I dunno. I'm sure I'll get another story idea during its process. And I want to write something with Naruto. Because I love Naruto. Because he's so stupid but in such a cute way! WEEEEEE! And if you have Naruto- you have to have characters like JIRAIYA which means you'll need TSUNADE! and then SASUKE which means you'll have to have ITACHI & THE OTHER AKATSUKI! And if you have the Akatsuki, you need KAGE'S AND JINCHURIKI! and if you have Kage's and Jinchuriki, YOU NEED BODYGUARDS AND OTHER UNDERMENTIONED CHARACTERS! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

...Or, I might just end up making yet another Akatsuki AU... Because Akatsuki are awsomely hawt, and in a AU you can use honorfics but still make jokes about American celeberties... So, Orginally, this chapter almost never came to be. But I realized- I'll be doing all this angsty crap with Akatsuki- it needs a FINALE! And so this chapter was came up with-... uhhh, how'd I get the idea for this chapter? wow, I dunno, I can't remember... Hmmmmm...

OKAY! so, If this were an anime: The intro for Chapters 1 through 7 would be Leave me Alone(I'm Lonely) by P!nk. And the outro would be 4Ever by-... some Disney girl I don't remember... Chapter 8 would be like a lost episode. Then Chapters 9 through 19 would have the intro One of Those Girls by Avril Lavigne. and the outro song of Addicted by Kelly Clarkson. The Epilouge Episode would be introless, however with Kelly Clarksons 'You Found Me' playing in the background. And the ending credits would have the song Runaway by- uhhhh, that might be Avril Lavigne again... This is how much free time I have! And with sissy leaving- I'll have ten times more free time!... If I even get to keep the computer! I hope so! WEEEEE!... A TIME SKIP HAS HAPPENED! You can decide how long it's been since the events of last chapter. A month, a year, a day. There's no reason to state it. And Konan's never going to, so- actually, AT LEAST a week has passed. Because to keep the chapter from being depressingly short, I had her talk mindlessly about stuff they did... Moving on-

Okay, I'll stop talking for now. But NOW you want to read the last chapter don't you? YOU KNOW YOU DO! WEEEEEEEEEEE! CHAPTER!

Fun Fact: A character that never appered before will be in this chapter. And their roll was almost taken by my sister. Untill I decided on an actual Naruto character to play it XD

-**Fighting your Demons**-

"And THAT is the story of how I got this sex tape created." Chiyo finished. Holding up the little black casette tape. "And you will be watching this if you are more then twenty minutes late tonight."

Sasori glared at the woman. All of us were standing behind him, waiting for her to give the OK for him to be able to walk away.

"You may leave now, be careful dear! AND USE A CONDOM! I know you stick to the boys during your orgys, but when you're nearing the finale, it's hard to tell which one is holding the boobs."

That sentance- wasn't even funny. It made me too nausous. Sasori continues to glare at her, before he decides to turn around and come with us.

With Kisame and Sasori down, me and Yahiko have still yet to collect-... All the people I didn't just mention.

So, we tumble ourselves down Rich People Hill and into the Shop Line. Yahiko goes to the shortcut for Buisness Summerhomes and does his fancy whistle to signal.

"AHHHHHHHHHHH THE MARSHMELLOW AGAIN!" That sentance-... I'm not sure I want to know the back story to that sentance.

Through the trees I can see Hidan jump out of- thankfully- a first-story window. And you can faintly hear Kakuzu yelling at him from inside the house. Hidan runs over to us and stops himself by jumping and skidding through the dirt and to our feet.

He turns around to lay on his back. "Awww, man! Ko's wearing pants!" He whines.

I bring my legs together to squeeze his head. "Get up. And no, the pervert charade doesn't fool anyone. We know you're crushing on the Beastieboys."

Hidan jumps up. Normally, it would be hard to feel so motherly with someone half a foot taller then you, and so very bulky. But Hidan's just that stupid. "Shaddup, Beasty-boyz rock!"

Yahiko seems to groan, meanwhile, I can see Kakuzu locking his front door and running over. "Hidan, they already look annoyed. What did you do?"

"GAH! Everyone's gangin' up on meh!"

Meanwhile again, across the street. Screaming is heard. "HELP!" We turn around, Deidara runs out of the bar. "IT'S WORSE THEN SPARKLY VAMPIRES! MAKE IT STOP!"

Everyone had a moment of 'worse then sparkly vampires? no such thing!' untill Deidara's chaser ran out after him. In his underwear...

"DEIDARA-SEMPAI! Common I know you're good with fashion! HELP ME CHOOSE!" Tobi yelled, wearing a pair of boxers, that creepily matched his hat. He was holding one pair of peach-colored jeans, and a pair of jeans covored in sparkles... Why do I suddenly have the feeling that he is going to be the one that kills me someday?

Deidara jumped off the porch and ran to hide behind his Danna. "MAKE IT GO AWAY!"

Yahiko had a leader moment. He quickly grabbed Tobi's shoulders before he could start chasing Deidara in circles around Sasori. "Hey- Tobi! you know what- I like those sparkles. What do you think Konan?"

I nodded rapidly. "I like sparkles."

"Okay!" He through the other pair, perfectly, in a garbage can behind him. Then he wrestled on the bleached blue-jeans stained with glitter, paint, half-washed marker-pictures, and spi-dazzler studs that might have once upon a time formed a pattern. "I'm ready to go now!"

"Good Tobi, now we have to get-"

"WAITWAITWAIT!" Tobi interupted. Then he ran to the doorway of the bar. "DADDY! CAN YOU GET ME MY BELT!"

"Which one?" Madara yelled, he was closing down early, and according to the sign he had in the window. The reason was 'Too many drunks'

"THE SHINEY PINK ONE THAT SPARKLES IN THE LIGHT!" And thank gawd they're drunks. Madara took his very ashamed time going upstairs and looking for that belt. But then he threw it out the window so he wouldn't have to walk through the drunks holding it. "THANK YOU!" Tobi put on the belt that had the cootsie little heart belt-buckle. "Now I'm ready!"

Yahiko face palmed and I was trying not to feel embarressed. I just have to think that all of Tobi's actions are to take away from: once again, his world domination plan! and all the depression turns to fear!

Tobi hopped up, Deidara was either loving clinging to Sasori or still too scared to come out from behind him. Yahiko took a deep breath, Hidan was laughing, where as Kakuzu has long ago mastered the art of pretending he doesn't know us. "Okay, as I was saying. Now, we can go get Itachi."

And the Kisame is nothing without his bestest buddy! Poor blue guy looks so lonely without him. I go over and hold his hand. We gaily swing and skip together towards the run-down building our mortal god calls a home.

Me and Kisame start up the stairs untill we turn. The others are following us, minus one blonde and one world-domination seeker.

"I am _not_ going to the Uchiha's." Deidara pouted like he didn't have one clinging to his arm right now.

"I-it's sc-scary. I don't wanna go inside!" Tobi started tearing up as he shakily held Deidara's arm.

"Fine, wait here then." Sasori said, but there was sadisim in his voice, because we could all predict that reply.

Deidara's pretty blue eyes got wide. He looked at Tobi, and then at the building. Tobi. Building. Tobi. Building. Tobi. Building. Tobi. Building. Tobi. Building. "Don't leave me with Tobi!"

Tobi didn't seem to react to the comment. But us continuing up the stairs silently just felt so evil and wicked~ Deidara seemed to screech, before pulling away from a whining Tobi and chasing after us.

I've been up here enough before to not be paranoid we'll break the steps. I'm still holding onto Kisame's hand to keep from slowing down and falling back. We all hear laughing as we make it to the top. "Naruto! step away from the Uchiha's!"

Naruto starts laughing louder as he grabs Sasuke's arm all possive-like. Itachi's sitting on a blanket across from them having fun just watching the polar-opposites interact.

Me and Kisame go over. Naruto tackles Sasuke and holds him hostage. "Naruto, you can keep the asshole. But we only ask that you hand over the nice one."

"Will I get my five-million ryo and hellicopter?" He yells.

"If by that you been five bucks and a remote control hellicopter. On Christmas yes."

Naruto pulls his imaginary gun away from Itachi. And nodds. Then he goes back to molesting Sasuke.

Kisame helps Itachi up. "Oh, Madam Konan, I'm not sure how to repay you." He takes my hand and bends down to kiss it. Behind me, Hidan makes a very loud 'Ewwww!'

We turn to leave, and someone makes another noise. This followed a piece of cardboard falling down. And was Deidara screaming like alittle girl. Everyone stared at him for a while, untill he started looking utterly suicidal, and we allowed him to keep 2% pride and run the lead back downstairs.

Once we had all squeezed through. Deidara seemed to be hiding behind something, while Tobi was finishing up a game of tic-tack-toe that he was playing with himself in the dirt. "Darn it! Why can't I ever do this!"

"Alright then. What's our first destination?" This entire group-up is just to get together and run around aimlessly. If it wern't for Itachi's comment, we might have stood here and done nothing for quite a while.

"We can walk to the Cafe," Yahiko suggested. Hidan made a screaming noise, and Deidara has willed his brain into forgetting the events of the past ten minutes, and is back to whining. Tobi is also whining.

"Guys! I lost to myself in tic-tack-toe!" He groaned, very childishly.

Kakuzu raised an eyebrow. "How the hell do you lose to yourself in tic-tack-toe?"

Tobi blinked at him. Like he said something insanely stupid. "Simple! you play by yourself, and you end in a tie." Wow, that was simple. I feel-... rather retarded right now.

But, Deidara just punched Tobi in the head, probably for making _him_ feel stupid. "Okay okay okay, break it up." Yahiko put his hand out to keep Deidara from farther mauling. "We start walking now, okay?"

"OKAY!" Tobi yells, then he grabs Deidara and Hidan's hands and starts pulling them into the distance. Down the road, to hell.

Itachi's turn to face-palm. As Kisame's jaw drops open, Kakuzu groans about crap, and Yahiko clentches his eyes shut, in denile. I'm just standing cutely next to them. "Well, are we gonna start walking?"

All the guys slowly nod, while still doing what they were previously doing. Sasori's just standing there, completely impassive. And so I get to lead the way, when we turn the corner, Tobi, Dei and Hidoid are already becoming ants. Although the latter two seems to be chasing the former.

-Later

We caught up to the Uke's pretty damn quick. Since they all seemed to have collapsed into a heap shortly after their sprint, and the Seme's then had to pull them along. Tobi doesn't have a Seme, except when we're in Homeroom, and he raises his hand every couple seconds to ask Zetsu something. So right now, he's just crawling after Deidara.

I think my legs are getting stronger. Or these shoes Hidan and Kisame got me are just totally wicked. I'm not as tired when we get to the break tree as before. Everyone sits down to regain their hype.

Bark has grown over the burnt dent that was in the tree from Dei's joyride. Needless to say, Yahiko forbid him from getting a license for a while. Despite Deidara's argument- that I gladly joined in on at the time. 'It's Sasori's stupid cars fault!'

But Deidara's still the kind that would have a comical collection of speeding tickets in his glovebox. Just like Yahiko's the kind that would get pulled over for going too slow. And Hidan's the kind that would get into a fender-bender infront of the Court House.

And Sasori's the kind that would quickly put on a skirt he hides under the seat before the cop came to his window, and he would then proceed to flirt his way out of a ticket in a russian accent...

I think me, Kisame and Itachi are gonna be the only ones that end up driving. Yeah... No explanation for Tobi needed at this point.

Sasori currently looks bored. While Deidara re-charges his batteries that died during the grand Tobi chase. Kisame is pacing around the tree, talking to Kakuzu whenever he passes his side- where Kakuzu is checking the money in his wallet. I guess he keeps accusing Hidan of stealing.

Hidan has already recharged, using the power of Jashin-Sama's yaoi love. And is currently climbing the tree, and just egging on Deidara to go after him. Which I think he's about to. Itachi might be meditating. He's been doing better health-wise actually, which you think all the crap we've done would have killed him already. He just sits cross-legged next to me and raises his head every so often to tease someone or make a comment.

Yahiko's also walking in circles. But it's up on the road. Rarely does a car pass here, and when one does, it usually honks at us. Which can get annoying. There's some new rumors going on at school- The reason all of us were absent from school for almost a month? oh, it was because we were having a sexathon and couldn't pull ourselves out of eachother to learn things.

Then there's the one- yes yes. It was that- no, Deidara wasn't in a _Asylum._ He was hiding out, because he was the one that hi-jacked a truck and ran Karin over! Yes! all the students in school actually _believe_ Orochimaru! Because he's genius! honest! and SANE!

Oh oh oh- and another one. Me and Yahiko are all chummy because I'm pregnant. But I lost the baby and am now emo, that's why I haven't gained any weight. And so I'm now sleeping around with all the other Akatsuki because I wanna get pregnant again. Oh- don't get me started on this next one- Tobi keeps calling Madara 'Daddy' because he's his pedophilic lover. But Zetsu loves Tobi too- and is trying to get him off the addictions to Madara's meth stash. No joke- we all started laughing when we heard that one.

Besides that, Sasori isn't really alive. He's a zombie now- no, this week he's a vampire. But yesterday, he was a vampire zombie! Yes! Naruto truely did report hearing this!

It's fun, because all those people make me feel ten times smarter. And then I do modest on my Math homework. It's a good system.

Hey- wait, I forgot one rumor. I'm surrounded by all these hot guys and I'm lesbian. Yay, I wish. When it's that time of a month and ym hormones betray my morals, Yahiko has to lock me in my room before I attempt to rape Itachi or Deidara, or both, at the same time... It's all Coach Guy's fault, he wreaked the girls' changing room, and we all had to change on one side of a curtain, and I saw Dei and Ita getting out of the shower. And I proceeded to tell Guy I was sick, and I then went to the Alley to put a ice-pacl between my legs and cry softly... Then I kinda felt guilty and made sure to tackle Yahiko and serve his every whim for a week...

And I know what you're thinking. But no, not now, nor any time soon. Because apparently, Akatsuki is full of perverted Amish guys... The real Amish, not the kind they pretend are real and try to outlaw. Okay? well- maybe not Amish. We all act too gay for that. But we're virgins dammit. Very, very perverted virgins...

...Moving on... Must be getting to my time of month. I don't keep a calander anymore. Too many jokes for Hidan to make when he comes over.

I bring my head up. I've been sitting here, the entire time. Just thinking. Thinking. Thinking... Actually- you know what? we could become Amish. I kind of like that idea. Maybe would could start a new Amish trend to- Women having multipul husbands. That sounds fangirlishly, obnoxiously epic.

"Hey," I called. Not being directly to anyone. "Say: 'Aye'."

During my thoughts, Deidara had climbed the tree. Yahiko'd picked up his pacing pace. Kisame'd joined Itachi on the ground. And Kakuzu's apparently yelling up at Hidan because he noticed he was missing some change.

Deidara: "Hn- aye!"

Kisame: "_Yaaawn._ Aye."

Itachi: "Aye,"

Yahiko: "Aye."

Hidan: "Yea well fuck you too- aye!"

Kakuzu: "Aye- Hidan put your hands where I can see them!"

Sasori: "... Aye... hn..."

Tobi: "..."

"Tobi?" I looked up. Tobi, at one point had apparently made it to the top of the tree.

"Lookie!" He pointed from the top.

We looked where he pointed. Down the road where we just came. Madara's truck zoomed past us, with what was less of a wave, and more of a middle-finger at us hiking losers.

After that. Yahiko had to sit down. Deidara fell out of the tree in shock- Kakuzu caught him and threw him on the very pale Sasori. Itachi blinked a few times, Kisame started crying. And Tobi just clapped his hands because he saw'ded his Daddy firstest!

-Later

"Whole buncha' mothafuckaz up in hear." Hidan grunted as we finally neared our destination. While Kisame and Deidara had already found their second winds and were waving us down, having sprinted to the finish before us. Yahiko's pride had taken such a fatal blow, he had to hold onto _me_ for support this time around.

Tobi joined his Dei-Sempai and was now doing jumping jacks- or something close to that effect. Currently, since Hidan was being tugged along by Kakuzu, who was interogating him about where his money went, Sasori was the one farthest behind. Being about a foot behind Itachi.

After the hyper ones, I got my feet to the uneven sidewalk. Joined then by Yahiko, and the rest. "Okay..." Yahiko called/moaned. "Now where too..." He was too tired and upset to make it a question.

Itachi raised his hand. "I have to go to the bathroom." He was close to seeming sadistic with the grin of irony on his face.

Itachi has the irony grin on alot. Makes you wonder if all Uchiha's are world domination bent geniuses. If so, Itachi's going to achive it, and then give it to Sasuke as a Sweet Sixteen present. I can see that happening. Meanwhile, Yahiko nodded, and Itachi, Deidara, Kisame and Tobi went to fight for the bathroom.

Sasori weezingly joined our group, having achived making it too the sidewalk. "Stupid... people... all of you..."

"We know we're all inferior to you Sasori." I cooed. "Now just sit down before you have a heart attack and we have to spoon-feed you again."

Sasori gave me what could arguably be the fiercest glare he's given to anyone but Deidara or his Grandmother. "Stupid little twit- _Hidan_ was spoon-fed, not me!"

Yahiko took his comeback chance to regain some pride. "No, Sasori. You just had to time your feedings and make sure you were in the bathroom at the right time. Claps for Sasori, he never shit himself."

The red chibi was ready to pounce on Yahiko, when a man dressed in rags came up. And he chose not to act violent infront of someone who might decide that he was the smartest in this group. "I'm sorry children, but I'm short just a few cents for the payphone. May I borrow just a quarter?"

Yahiko instinctively dug into his pocket. "No change sir, have a dollar." He said grinning.

"God bless." The man said, before nodding and turning to head for the payphone.

Yahiko turned back to us. "Alright, anyone hungry?"

"Nope," Kakuzu said, followed by head shakes and more no's.

Yahiko rolled his eyes. Surrounded by bottomless pits that decide to fill up when they have nothing better to do. "Okay, what else is there?"

"We could take Hidan's necklace and start running." Kakuzu suggested. Hidan grabbed his necklace and backed away from him a few paces.

"Mindless Kakuzu. That will have no climax. I vote we look for a refridgerator box, and put it over Deidara and Itachi's heads. Then sit on it." Sasori called. Sasori's motto: When pissed at the world, torture Deidara.

Kisame returned to us. "I have an idea!" He said, picking up on the conversation. "Bungee-jumping!"

"I feel like destroying private proberty." Hidan said. "Tobi! what time does your aunt usually get home?" Hidan called, as Tobi followed shortly after Kisame.

Tobi thought for a second. "Ummm, I think she's doing things in the school for a while today~" Absently, a thought hit me that Deidara and Itachi are alone somewhere right now. And I tried to remember if any of us brought cellphones- wait. How many of us _own_ cellphones? We're going to have to find some other way to contact a ambulance.

I think that right after that- it hit Yahiko too. He went from trying to figure out what to do- to completely blank. Not wanting his brain to think of the possabilities.

As if our angels were confirming they wanted to screw us today, we all heard Deidara's voice, far off, start raising several pitches.

-Later

"HE was pushing ME!"

"I didn't do anything Deidara_, you_ tried to climb over my _head._"

"YOU WERE IN MY WAY!"

"If I was in your way then I can't understand how you manage to get past the _air_ daily!"

"YOU'RE _SICK!_ AND _DISGUSTING!_ AND _EVIL!"_

"AND _YOU_ ARE_ INSANE!"_

Itachi has lost his temper. I can honestly say, I have seen it all now. I don't know what might've happened in that line to the bathroom, but whatever it was, it sure pissed these two off quite effectively.

Meanwhile, we were back to square one. "And there's nothing tall enough to bungee jump off of Kisame. So that's why _that_ idea is out of the question."

I'm sitting on this pile of things I don't know what are. And studying Itachi and Deidara's fight, because angry Itachi is just so rare and fasinating. Things start to catch my eye though, I turn my head to look at some rags that have left on a trashcan that are blowing in the wind. "I have an idea! let's all grab some girls and tell them we're gay and see what rumors start tomarrow!" Hidan yelled out of my eye-range.

"Us being gay is the oldest rumor in the school Hidan." Yahiko explained.

"Let's tell them we're straight!" Kisame tryed. I start to not register what they're saying when I regonize those rags.

"No here's one! let's throw Itachi in a sewer, and tell everyone he ran off when he found out we wern't gay!" Deidara yelled. Then I heard a smack that might have actually been Itachi being violent with the back of Deidara's head.

"Let's do that with _you_ Deidara. And then we can all walk away and do something productive so we can balance out our joy." That was from Sasori's voice, but-

"Yahiko?" I whispered. He turned to look at me, and I met his eyes. "Look over there." 

I pointed to the rags. He regonized them too. "How'd those get there?"

It's been getting colder lately, Halloween's comming up. And trees are changing, and all that poetic crap. All the poetic crap that explains why those rags logically shouldn't of been discarded.

Everyone's still spouting their suggestions of what to do now when Tobi speaks up. "Hey! looky looky!"

Tobi was pointing to the old building we usually do concerts in. Some of the old lights seemed to be on inside, even though Yahiko's rented it so many times, the guy actually let him buy it. So all the more reason why the lights shouldn't be on. "Did that guy go in there?"

Yahiko thought for a moment, but then Tobi yelled again. "Hey! It's Aunty Tsunade!" Okay, moving on.

"What would Tsunade be doing in there?"

"I dunno~" Tobi sang. Smiling randomly, being his demented self.

Itachi had stopped yelling at Deidara. "We _were_ looking for something to do." He said, while Deidara continued yelling at him.

Yahiko sighed. "Fine, we can go check it out." He led the way and everyone slowly decided they had nothing better to do then to follow.

We all scurried over, and Kisame and Kakuzu pulled open the giant, heavy metal doors with the usual rickety sounds. When they were wide we all entered. Yahiko and Tobi ran up front and started looking around, untill Tobi pointed to one of the suspended bridges above. "Aunty Tsunade!"

Up on the bridge, Principal Tsunade was sitting down, giving a smile that looked very off. "Hey, Tobi honey. What are kids doing here?" She asked.

"We saw you. What are _you_ doing in here?" Yahiko called.

Tsunade nodded her head. "I'm looking for something one of the students might have hid up here is all. Oh, Tobi, how's your Mother?"

Wait, what? Tobi cocked his head before nodding. "Fine,"

"Alright, well you kids get out of here, I'm about to give up and head out. Be careful now." Tobi nodded, then he grabbed Yahiko's hand and led him back over to us.

Tobi kept moving towards the door, when we were all the other side of it he put his finger over his lips and shushed. "Tobi, your Mother is dead." Itachi noted.

Tobi nodded. Keeping his finger up. "She is, that was the code Tsunade taught me for if I'm ever in trouble. I call her and ask how my Momma is." He whispered.

The air got silent for a minute. "Is Tsunade in trouble then?"

He nodded his head again. "I think that's what she just said."

Yahiko looked back inside the building, the door was still open. "How do we help?"

That was followed by Kakuzu raising his hand. "I have an idea."

-Later-Normal POV

Her only hope, ironicly, would be the rambuncious group of local kids that she kept having to send to detention. Yay.

Tsunade took deep breaths with her mouth closed. She watched in the corner of her eye as Akatsuki closed the double doors again. And she let herself relax. She just wanted them out of there.

When the place was pitch-black again, minus some light that still came in through a space in the doors. She heard shoes clacking on metal. "Well, wasn't that cute?" The man came into the dim light from the window and knelt down to her. "Wish they could've stayed. I love kids." His face was full of wrinkles and he had a X scar on his chin. He squinted at her through the light.

"Just tell me what you're going to do?" She growled.

He grinned down at her. "We could always go to your house. How big of a family do you have? I like getting people in groups."

"You're a monster."

"No, I think I'm just a social person." He said. "Last job I did, I had to rush it. Much to my dissapointment when I figured out they rushed my time because their son wasn't home yet."

Tsunade glared at him. Her hands were bound and her feet were taped to the floor, much to the sadness of her urges to kick him. "You've actually been going around, killing entire families for months. A serial killer, that's the most pathetic title on this earth! You couldn't find anything better to do?"

He shrugged. "I don't like that title. It's too cliche, and makes the simple-minded think of breakfast food."

"Alright then, torturer. Why don't you just hang me and get it over with? I'll even write a suicide note. Let you take a break from being suspected for a while."

He went back to grinning. "I have no worry of suspect. I've been walking up and down this road for days and asking everyone I see for spare change. If anyone see's me being questioned by police, they'll come down like 'He's just our poor homeless man'. Don't you think?"

She couldn't deny. She didn't suspect him of anything at all when he wobbled up to her asking for help to find his cat in the building. It was truely such a stupid lie, it couldn't of been a lie. At least that's what she thought.

She opts to stop talking to him. No point to argue with a insane man whose 'work' has been all over the news for almost a year. She already tried fighting earlier, all she got was painful realization that all of her kick-boxing wasn't going to help against the defensive and offensive arts this guy was specializing in.

It was about half an hour as he sat in the shadows, just letting her emotions play with themselves before something started to happen, the bridge they were on shook. Just like someone was walking on it. But Tsunade had long since stopped struggling, and her captor wasn't leaving his spot from the shadows. But the light in the building kept either of them from knowing that.

The man was about to roll his eyes over his victims restarted attempts when he felt a presense behind him. Followed by a very hard object being hit over his head. "Got it!" Hidan yelled.

Tsunade looked up, before she was able to do much more then that, Kakuzu was behind her taking the tape off her feet. "That took a while!" She yelled at him.

"Yahiko wanted the plan to be perfect. And me and Hidan have been here the whole time." He explained. After the tape was off she pushed herself up.

"Aunty!" Tobi called, he opened the heavy doors by himself and waved. Tsunade jumped skillfully onto a crate, and then onto the ground. "Hi!"

"Hello Tobi." She said sweetly. Before Itachi and Kisame were flanking her and took off her arm restraints. "What have you been doing?"

"We were trying to decide when we found you." He notified. Tsunade nodded absently and Kisame and Itachi led them both out.

After that, Yahiko and Konan came inside. "Kakuzu! status?"

"I'm fine." Came the elder. "Not sure what the hell Hidan's doing."

"I'm looking for something to hog-tie him with!" Came said boys reply. "And then- hey! he's still awake!" He finished, sounding slightly dissapointed.

After that, a clank. Like something was turned on. And then a rumbling. Before the roof started caving in.

-Konan's-POV

"What was that?" I yelled.

"Seemingly." Yahiko groaned. "His back-up plan."

Our heads fling up in time to see a piece of the roof break off above us. The danger doesn't register untill after Yahiko's already grabbed me and pulled me down. It falls on his back and rolls off.

Feeling suddenly very annoyed. I push him into sitting position. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine- just get out of here." He cringed from the blow. But right then I felt Itachi's hand on my shoulder.

"Are you two okay?"

"Itachi get Konan out of here now!" Itachi nodds and leads me up and out the door. Wow, maybe I am still a damsel in distress.

"Kisame, get him," Itachi says annoyed. Kisame joggs over and helps Yahiko up.

They both join us outside and they close the big metal door. "Do you want to kill him?" It was more of a confirmation then a question.

"No, we're just going to trap him untill the cops get here." He says. Taking a lighter and setting the vines on the side of the building on fire.

-Meanwhile-Normal POV

Deidara already heard the command and had a tank of gasoline (conviniently if not stupidly placed within his reach) and was coating the roof with it. With matches in his pocket that he planned to set with. He hardly even realized how much he might get on himself or how flamable he already was. But that's just like him.

Sasori was down below, not really wanting to participate in the arson. And not really being able to. "Deidara get your stupid ass down here!"

Deidara threw the tank over the side of the building (a yelp from Hidan making him laugh) "Gimme a second I need to set the roof on fire!" Deidara said as-matter-of-factly, he took the matches and was about to strike them. Untill a whining distracted him. Turning around, Tobi had made his way ontop of the roof. "Tobi get your stupid ass down there! hn,"

"Deidara~" He whined getting over to him. "Let me do it, you might fall!" He argued, like falling was the most dangerous accident that might happen at this point.

"YOU get off here Tobi!" Tobi gave him a look of complete blankness like Deidara's just said the stupidest thing in the world. "Tobi?" The boy then outstreched his arm and pushed Deidara off the ledge.

_BAM_

"Deidara dammit!" Sasori wiggled and tried to push Deidara off of him. "That _hurts_ get off!"

"Thanks for breaking the fall Sori'. Hn," Deidara shook his head for a moment. Tried to regain his composure, like Sasori wasn't spitting cusses and death threats at him, _again._ "Wait, you feel this?"

"Of course I fucking feel it you little imbe-" Sasori stopped. "... I do."

The two stared at eachother in that miraculous awe moment. Untill their concentration was thrown off by the roof going up in a giant inferno.

-Meanwhile

"SHIT shit shit shit!" Hidan pulled his one blazing hand off the roof before smothering the flames with his shirt.

"Be careful you idiot!"

"I AM BEING CAREFUL!" Hidan yelled back at Kakuzu.

"You ARE NOT BEING CAREFUL!"

"ARE TOO!"

"ARE NOT!"

"ARE TOO!"

"ARE TOO!"

"ARE NOT!"

Silence, besides the cackling of the flaming roof. Then: "Thank you for agreeing with me for once Hidan."

"GODDAMMIT!" Hidan then decided to ignore it. The two had climbed out the window and were now currently scaling the second story of the building. Looking for something to help climb down.

They continued to shimmy past windows and avoid placing their hands on the parts of the roof that were currently burning.

Just then, the window Hidan had been trying to work past broke open. "You motherfucking little bastard!" The criminal yelled, trying to reach out and strangle him.

However Kakuzu was put off-balance by this. Hidan seemed to impassively come up with humor. "Gasp! watch your tongue!" Hidan dug into his cargo pants and pulled out his best friend, his little red knife. "Say 'ah!'."

"AHH!" The man yelled, probably just out of fates councidance. Hidan slashed the knife across the mans face. Slicing through something, before the man screamed in agony and thrashed his arms more in Hidan's direction.

Hidan still had a sturdy hold of the gutter they were holding. So being pushed shouldn't of done anything. So it was purely the gutters fault for breaking, and sending Hidan and Kakuzu down- and convieniantly, in a dumpster located directly below them.

Kakuzu made a mere grunt and Hidan did no more then complain about what disgusting guck he might have fallen into.

After a few moments, when Kakuzu registered that they just avaided a serial killer. "Good god, the things I do for friends."

"Kuzu?"

"Yes Hidan?"

"Did you ever notice our lifes are more dig-deeper-cliche then a Marvel comic?"

"I've always reffered to Runaways."

"I have a thing for Nico."

"I've always leaned more towards Gertrude." Hidan layed there relatively silent for a few minutes before he hopped up and started digging. "Hidan, now's not the time for dumpster diving."

"Just a second, I heard glass break when we fell." Kakuzu couldn't really comprehend how Hidan could have heard anything more then the raging inferno above their heads. Or the fact that Hidan the pulled out a six-pack of alchohol bottles seconds later.

"Who wants cocktails!"

-Meanwhile

Tobi was still on the roof. Walking along a trail on the roof that- thank his lucky stars wasn't ablaze.

"Tobi!"

"TOBI YOU MOTHERFUCKER GET DOWN HERE SO I CAN KICK YOUR ASS!" Yay! Deidara-Sempai! Tobi thought. But he also had the side thought on his mind that he would not be going towards that voice right now.

Then a third voice called his name. This one in the direction he was actually going. He hopped over to the edge of the roof and peered down. "Hi Daddy!"

Madara glared up at his son, who was standing on top of a roof, that was currently on fire... Yup, that was his son. "Tobi! Get down here!" 

"That's funny!"

"What the hell is funny Tobi!"

"Everyone keeps saying the same thing!"

But maybe he got the ditziness from his mother. Yes, as far as Madara was concerned, that's what it was. "Just get down here!"

Tobi nodded smiling. And then jumped off the roof.

Madara shook sense into his head in time to catch him. "I didn't mean that way!"

Tobi cocked his head. "Was I supposed to use another way? Why didn't you tell me?"

There was no reply to that sentance that would make Madara feel better. So he set Tobi down, and groaned. "TOBI!"

Tobi turned around, "Hi Deidara-Sempai!" He gleed, opening his arms. But when his Sempai did get to him, he punched him in the head. "Owwie." Then, Madara punched him in the head. "Owwie!" Then, Tsunade came around the corner. Fuming. So Tobi decided to say a pre-"Ow..."

-Meanwhile-Konan's POV

Okay, I know everyone but big bad and evil is out. Because Tobi is currently being beaten by our former hostage, Deidara, and Madara. And Hidan was currently throwing Molotov Cocktails at the windows. While Kakuzu and Sasori have joined us... Well, this feels rather quaint.

Hidan seems to finish, and Tobi and his attackers have also joined us. Yahiko panted, sitting on a crate that hadn't been used as firewood. "Is everyone okay?"

"Hidan has second-degree burns on his hand." Kakuzu pointed out, gesturing at our little drug addict.

"And I have a tongue in my pocket!" He dug inside and took out a bloody pink thing- ohmygawd that really is a tongue.

"Cool!" Tobi cooed.

"Can I play with it?" Asked our little blonde psycho-case.

"Give me that." Tsunade grabbed the tongue out of his hand. And then- when she registered she was holding a tongue. Made a rather girly noise and threw it away.

Madara raised an eyebrow. "That's not what _my_ tongue looks like." He said, probably trying to desipher what the adverage, healthy tongue looks like.

Yahiko moaned. "Okay, can we be serious a few seconds?"

"Sori feels this!" Deidara then proceeded to poke Sasori, where as Sasori replied with wacking his hand away several times untill he finally just punched him in the face. Deidara wobbled around dazed for a second. "...Weee... yay, hn."

Yahiko sat straighter and raised an eyebrow. "Okay, that's good news."

"I think my brain just had to be knocked into a diffrent position." Sasori said plainly, as Deidara started rubbing his newest lump to see if it was bleeding this time.

Kakuzu groaned. "Alright. So we saved the day yet again. Now what?"

"At least it was legally this time." Hidan mused.

Tsunade suddenly looked more uneasy then the adverage former hostage victim. "What _illigal_ saving have you done?"

"We-" Tobi was tackled from behind. By none other then- Mr. Zetsu.

"Tobi! You good boy! Hey, I need you to look over some tests for me!" I'm not sure how long our teacher had been standing here. But he took Tobi off as the sirens down the road got louder, and Tsunade tryed to forget he was about to say something.

-Later

"Okay, I'm bored again."

"No one _cares_ Hidan." Kakuzu moaned again.

We were given a ride back to our little village. Itachi stood crossing his arms, while behind him, Kisame gave Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura a detailed and exaggerated discribtion of what we did today. "Don't be so harsh, Kakuzu. I'm bored by now too." 

"Well you're just _boring._" Deidara moaned. I think he's laying on Sasori's lap or something. "Stupid Uchiha."

Itachi seemed to smile. And then cocked his head. "You're so restless Deidara. I have an idea. Lets tie you down onto Tobi's bed. And see what he decides to do. If it turns into the right thing you might become alittle less stuck up."

I could feel the heat begin to radiate off Deidara's body as his cells leveled up into Hostile: Uchiha Mode. But I think I figured out Itachi's master plan. He's becoming Deidara's rage outlet. Quite ingenius actually, makes Itachi more heart-throbby. Sasori backs away from Deidara as the blonde jumps up- Oh, this is good for Itachi too. he can get some excersize.

As Deidara chased Itachi into the field, Zetsu's car pulled into the bend. Zetsu had to stop it eruptly when Tobi opened the door while he was still moving. Tobi ran over to me "Konan Konan Konan-Chan!"

"Yes?"

"Have you ever heard the story about the evil doctors daughter?"

Zetsu had parked his car and I smiled over at him for a moment. "I'm not sure I have Tobi, why don't you tell me?"

Tobi started telling the story. Yahiko was trying to explain to Hidan that one near-death experiance a day is good enough. Kisame was doing sound effects for the kiddies now, Naruto was excited, Sakura was awe-struck, and Sasuke looked somewhat bored. Like he hears this stuff everyday. You could still hear the screaming and see the figured of Deidara and Itachi running around the fields. Sasori scooted closer to me, and it's hard to remember back when we hated eachother when I look at his chibi face and he just looks scared crapless Deidara's going to drag him into that.

Zetsu leans against the porch of the bar while Madara's been sitting on it the whole time. Farther up behind us, Jiraiya seems to be interviewing Tsunade about her capture, and she just keeps hitting and cussing at him. Orochimaru has joined them, and when I look back and forth, I kind of see Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura being them in fifty years...Wow, where'd that come from?

Yahiko sat down after Kakuzu took over the roll of lecturing Hidan. "Well, they took the man away. And apparently, Zetsu says that the buildings in decent shape." He grinned. "We'll actually have something to _do_ in the up comming days."

Tobi was still talking, and I don't recall the story being this long, but I nodded. "What was that ones story?"

Yahiko grinned. "Maybe be met Kagura." I chuckled. Yes! if I hadn't been dragged away from Kagura, I would've become a serial killer, that makes sense! "But really, they said he was a former buisness men."

"Headlines, 'Broker who went broke, and then broke down.' " He nodded.

"Danzo- something. Funny what happens when crazy people have no friends, right?"

I laughed at that too. "Truely."

-**End Chapter**-

WEEEEEEE!1111111!

And it is now done! Thankies to all my BEAUTIFUL REVIEWERS! that make me happy and fuzzy! Cookies, Cupcakes, Cakes, Pie, and Illama's for you all! WEEEEE!

LUB LUB LUB LUB! Wonderful journey from-...wow, when did I start this?... ummm, it was 2009... Uhhhhh, I dunno... Long ago... In a distaint time... I came up with an idea, thankies to Crocodile Farm by Conversation Hearts, and my just plain luvvies for Konan-Chans... and other Akatsuki... Akatsuki!

Is it weird for me to say that I thought Akatsuki having to save Tsunade was genius? Is it weirder that I didn't decide to do that untill three paragrapths before she appered? Oh, and, I'm sorry. Danzo's last name escaped me. That's why they never said it . It's Shi-something, right? Darny. And yes, in confirmation of the 'fun fact' at the begging. My sister was almost the serial killer. But I decided to make her the absently mentioned 'Heather Sabako' in chapters 8 and 11. Weeee!

AND TRY TO REMEMBER If you want to: Ask me in your review after reading the Epilouge, for me to send you the EPILOUGES EPILOUGE!

Okay, SOOOOO... And then... Wow, yeah... I LUVVIES TO ALL MY REVIEWERS AND READERS! STAY HEALTHY! DON'T DO DRUGS! WAIT TILL AFTER MARRIAGE FOR SEX! PEAAAAAAAAAAACE!

And now, for the Epilouge, which was dreamed up, well, close to the same time I came up with the actual plot of the story. WEEE!

THANK YOU EVERYBODY! GOODNIGHT!


	20. Maybe

-**Maybe-**

It's been four years. Yup, four years went by so fast.

Mom moved out of Jiraiya's when I turned 18. She's dating a childhood friend in the next town over, couldn't be happier. Gets on TV every other month for her life-saving treatments too.

Yahiko's still his secluded self. Not much to say about him. He's still good as a worthy leader. It's just that he's keeping his mouth shut more and more. He'll lose those vocal cords eventually.

Itachi got a online deploma, he moved away with Sasuke and became a Teacher. He sends letters every so often.

Sasori got a College scolarship, he moved away right after graduating. Deidara does better everyday. But you just can't win over the school asshole like in the movies sometimes. Actually, I haven't seen Dei since _I _graduated. I'm _pretty_ sure he's still going to school.

Tobi had contracted AIDS. He's had it since he was born actually. No one thought he did untill Maddie kicked the bucket. I miss him, honestly. Not the guy you'd think you'd miss. But anyway, Tobi got moved away by his frantic Aunt looking for a cure/better chance of survival or something. But she should take it as miracle enough that he really lasted this long without medication.

Kakuzu became a big-shot lawyer. He kept coming around for Hidan. But, well, sometimes you just drift away. I guess Hidan says he calls _him_. And that he has a wife with twins on the way.

Hidan sold his parents' buisness the very minute he turned 18 and got possesion of it. He started a cult- er. Religon. I _told_ him I'd dabble in it... But...

Besides all that. Naruto still dreams of fame and fortune, and he keeps calling Sasuke constaintly, they need to make a movie about him. It'd be a hit on Lifetime.

_You found me,_

_when no one else was looking._

_How did you know?_

_Just where I would be._

_Yeah, you broke threw_

_all of my confusion_

_The ups and the downs_

_and you still didn't leave_

_I guess I just saw_

_what nobody could see,_

_The good and the bad_

_and the things in-between_

_You found me..._

I held my iPod in my hand sitting in the chair. Yahiko and everyone, they really did find me. I don't know how I could've ended up otherwise.

And we rode it all out. We rode it all untill the very last second. It was amazing. And I wouldn't change any of it.

They may all be gone from me now. In one form of the word or another. But if they'd never tryed, I wouldn't be who I am today. I always knew it wouldn't last forever. But it's side effects will.

...

PSYCH!

Did you _really_ believe that? gawd you're all so pathetic. Stupid telepathic aliens reading my mind.

Hidan really did start a cult though, it's creepy-ass shit. The friggin' religon for emos and women who have miscarriages. Thank God I'm such a devot cristian thought, cause it's kind of interesting in the way where you would almost join just to see what happens.

I don't have an iPod either. Kakuzu watches our spending like a hawk and won't let us shop anything from retail. This is a portable radio Dei won in a Art Fair.

"Tobi Uchiha," Principal Tsunade Senju calls with a smile. The boy looks like a damned vampire wearing that black graduation robe instead of all his bright pinks and oranges.

Unlike Deidara, who customized his gown in Lady-Gaga level weirdness. He just looks like a girl.

Hidan's yelling his lungs out from the seat directly next to me. I have to squeeze Yahiko's hand to drain out the pain in my ears. Kakuzu tries in vain to tell him to shut up.

Sasori's plugging his ears even from the other side of Yahiko. Itachi smartly chose the seat farthest from him on the end so he could freely use his hands to clap for the screeching little Tobi and cheering Deidara.

Madara, the poor, yes very alive man however. Had unknowingly chosen the seat directly infront of Hidan. Poor, grumpy, bar owner.

Naruto's behind us whining at the pain in his ears. Sakura's unhinged herself to yell at Hidan to shut up. Which Sasori thanks her for. Sasuke learned to block it out way better then any of us long, long ago.

Mom's with her boyfriend. Who wants to be a rap star. So that part was only half-true. He's friggin' hilarious though. Ya' fool.

I never mentioned my sweetheart angel Kar-Bear! After getting out of juvie. Orochimaru kidnapped Anko from the bar and they all left town. I miss Ankies~ But Karin sends me postcards. Last one had them at the Grand Canyon.

After Sasori's Grandma kicked-the-bucket. She left him a giant fortune that he claims he never even knew she _had._ (however, her Will had entitled the money to: 'My faggot Grandson and his group of holligan friends')

Me and Yahiko rented an apartment across from the school, just to survey things. Poor Kakuzu ended up having Hidan and Kisame move in with him. Where as all Uchiha's, Itachi, Sasuke, and Tobi, all ransacked the bar as a home finally. (Weekends at the bar... Not a pretty sight. Expecially if Deidara enters... Long story)

Deidara, the little spitfire. Moved in with Sasori. But no, no proof has been given that they're gay for eachother. Me and Kisame once snuck over to spy on them for a week straight. They didn't have sex once dammit. All that happened was Deidara bugged him, they argued, threw stuff at eachother. Sasori tried to read and Deidara would spend two hours trying to read over his shoulder. Then they argued and threw stuff again. Finally me and Kisame agreed alone that they wern't gay. Just utterly in love with eachother. I still have money on that one too.

However they tried many escapes, Deidara and Tobi were finally allowed off the platform once everyone had been given their little papers that said they were possibley, modestly smart. But now it's time for the great escape.

With family heirlomes in storage and all needed items in backpacks. We raced eachother to the Cafe.

A silver thing named Hidan got a head start fueled with adrenaline. Kakuzu snatched him eventually and me and Yahiko took the head front.

Deidara was dragging a very angry-looking Sasori, while he stripped off his robe to blind us all with the studs and glitz on his clothes. Hidan exclaimed this out loud.

Tobi was trailing behind him, trying to run and hug Madara at the same time. Eventually Madara got him off and Tobi started after to join us. Before turning around for another wave... I actually got the Madara-with-AIDS idea because, wandering into his room one fateful night. Discovered a DVD rack that included three diffrent versions of RENT... L.O.L.

Anyway, Itachi was bidding goodbye to Sasuke, as Naruto came over to squeeze mine and Yahiko's souls out of our noses. Naruto and Sasuke stole our runaway-idea. And cheated our 'after graduation' rule by getting excepted to colleges by lying about their age. So now, they had Sakura scrambling for an online degree, as she was coming with them.

Jiraiya was just egging it on when he bought the boy a sportscar. That only Sakura has a valid license to drive. Sasuke had a license in the palm of his hands, untill, for the first time. Deidara teamed up with _Itachi_ and created a scene to get Sasuke un-licensed. Because Deidara's a jackass and Itachi's paranoid.

Hidan was getting cussed out rather cutely by Ino Yamanaka. They formed a rivalry somewhere, and the blond that looked way too much like Deidara was mad that he was running away before she learned how to drop-kick him.

Eventually, goodbyes had to end and Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura got a rather unfair head-start for somewhere that wasn't here.

"Wait, are we _walking?_" Sasori said, dread in voice. Deidara and Tobi started gleeing.

"Oh I just want out FINALLY!" Hidan yelled, melodramatic and rather excitedly. Kakuzu countered with a hard punch in the face.

Itachi's cellphone rang. "Hi Sasuke!" Oh geez.

Kisame started laughing histaricly. But then I started giving the long road infront of us the same 'oh-gawd-no' look Sasori was giving it.

"Do the Princess_es_ need carried?" Yahiko asked. Deidara started singing something with the lyrics 'Sori-sori-princess-of-all-dollies' Which Tobi joined in on.

Before Sasori slapped Deidara and pulled Tobi's hat over his face. Badass, hawtass, jackass, tightass, there's no diffrence with Sasori. You just need to love him.

Everyone finally got their attention drawn away when a black van pulled up next to us. Decorated two years ago by our bored artists with red clouds. Zetsu poked a head out. "Do the children all need assistance?"

We all scrambled for the doors, then The car jerked forward. Try again. Zetsu hit the gas pedel again. Hidan lunges for the door and gets a face full of pavement as it speeds ahead to five feet infront of us... Well, he said 'assistance' not 'ride'

We started walking after it. And it drove forward, a couple times it sped forward and we had to chase to keep up with it. Eventually it pulled to the side of the road. It had stopped fifty feet infront of us of course though.

So we kept walking forward. Already tired, sweaty, and grumpy. Down the open road infront of us and secretly praying that van doesn't start moving again untill we're sitting on it's red velvet interior.

But eventually, everyone was chatting so loudly I couldn't understand any of it. All I knew was Deidara was poking Sasori, Tobi was poking Deidara. Hidan and Kakuzu were arguing about something that you didn't have to hear to know it was pointless. Kisame was swinging his sword around and Itachi was yakking about how he was missing Sasuke already. And finally- that Yahiko was holding my hand.

Maybe we give up and turn around. Maybe we start to hate eachother and split up forever. Maybe we join a mafia and become prostitute-drug dealing-hitmen.

Or maybe there's the truth;

Maybe we'll be great.


End file.
